A/N: Sorry for never really updating guys...with all of my stories for that matter, lol. Its just I get writers block, and then I'm too lazy to even try and update. And just...I feel that no one really cares enough for my stories lol. Or anything I do, actually. So this puts me off a lot. But whatever, I'll try and update at least a bit more regularly. K bye.


Lydia has known for about 2 weeks now. I realized after I proceeded to murder Hok with my hair straightener, that I was actually glad he had told her. Although I didn't let him know this, it kept him cowering in fear, and promising never to tell my secrets ever again. Which also made me glad. With each passing day, my feelings for Ryan just grow stronger and stronger, and this frustrates me, because I don't know what to do with these feelings. I'm torn between telling him the truth, or just trying to forget about them all together. I have a feeling, a small hunch, that he returns the same feelings towards me. But what if I'm wrong? What if I tell him, and he doesn't feel the same way? If he rejects me then and there? If he says we can no longer be friends, because he cannot handle his best friend being head-over-heels with them? I wouldn't be able to handle this, I really couldn't. Having years and years of friendship just wash down the drain like that...it wouldn't be worth it. I would rather keep him as just a friend, than to lose him completely. So that leaves me with my other option; trying to forget. Trying to forget all these romantic feelings I have towards him, try and find somebody else to love. As much as I think this is the safer and smarter option, I can't help but shake my head at my idiotic thoughts. Impossible. It is impossible to forget, to just simply give up on these feelings. I'm in too deep now, I can't turn back. But it can't hurt to try, right? Which is exactly why I'm currently standing in line to get into Purple Moon; the town's best nightclub. With high hopes that I will meet a suitable guy inside, I walk pass through the heavy looking doors and scan my eyes across the dance floor. Nightclubs have never really been my thing, so I actually have no idea why I decided to choose this place to start looking. Maybe it's because this is where most of the guys hang out, anyway? Trying to get into as many girl's pants as they can...hopefully I can find an actual decent male to talk to. Hopefully. I sigh as I make my way towards the bar; the less occupied place in the club. Everyone seemed to be on the dance floor, grinding against each other and into each other's ears. " bunch of fools," I muttered to myself as I ordered a glass of water. I didn't drink alcohol, and I didn't plan on starting tonight, either. Another thing Ryan and I have in common. I sighed as I thought of him, no matter what I do I just can't stop thinking about him. I've barely been here 10 minutes, and already I'm standing up to leave. Pathetic. This is the thought that enters my mind as I make my way towards the exit. It was a mistake to come here, I don't fit in. This is a place for one night stands, casual flings, affairs, youngsters...whatever you want to call it. But not for people who are in love. I shook my head as I fished around for my keys in my bag, scowl clearly visible on my face. I let out a frustrated sigh as I slammed the door shut, starting the engine and driving off into the night. 

A/N: So uhh...sorry if you didn't like this chapter...as I said, I kinda have writers block at the moment...lol. This is all I could think of right now...please comment and let me know what you think on this chapter, cause I'm kinda getting discouraged...I feel like I'm failing you all with this story right now...so sorry Cassie, sorry if it starts getting pathetic....I'll try my hardest, kay? Mmm...happy reading.