When Hana is drunk, she talks a lot.

                When Hana is upset, she talks a lot.

                When Hana is being Hana, she talks a lot.

                So that car ride was full of Hana ranting about how no one ever tells her what’s going on and how I never learn from my mistakes and how HanMi was probably going to have some little brother or sister soon and how we were just bad parents and how we just needed to be locked up in separate rooms for the rest of our lives because obviously we just couldn’t be next to each other without turning it into some sort of “romantic moment.” (Her words, not mine.)

                “Hana, we didn’t do anything.” I said for the millionth time, with a heavy sigh.

                Hana turned around and attempted to point at me. “And another thing! You, my friend, just had a baby! Do you really want to go through the whole pregnancy thing again? Because I was there. It wasn’t pretty. Or fun. Or even okay. It was horrible. And I’m not even talking about giving birth.”

                “Hana!” I cried out the same time Himchan said, “Okay! I think it’s time to change the subject.”

                But Hana was on a roll. “You were an emotional wreck. When you weren’t freaking out about being a bad mother or worrying about finding a home or a job, you were worried about your baby not knowing about YongGuk and YongGuk not knowing about the baby. You were, like, constantly worried about him too. Which I didn’t get, because you left him.” She turned to look at YongGuk. “On your birthday, she cried for a good three hours and ate nothing but that ramen you like for the whole day—“

                “Hana!” both Himchan and I snapped. She ignored us and only spoke louder.

                “She was so upset that she almost drove back and told you. Not just called you, but drove back to Incheon.” She hit the headrest on her seat as if to add emphasis. “I had to stop her though, because I knew that if she did, it would hold you back—“

                “You told her that?” YongGuk cut Hana off, suddenly sounding irritated. Hana nodded, looking proud of herself.

                “Yes I did. You were going off to be this huge artist. A baby would just slow you down—“

                “Hana, you don’t know that.” She fell silent from shock and YongGuk’s tone. He didn’t yell, or even sound the slightest bit angry, he just sounded disappointed. Almost as if what she’d said was a complete lie and it hurt him that Hana would even think that. Even I was surprised.

                “But with your career—a baby—wouldn’t—what?” Hana gave him a confused look, shifting more in her seat so that she was fully facing him.

                “Yah, would you sit down properly? Are you trying to get yourself killed?” Himchan demanded, trying to push Hana back into the correct sitting position with one hand while he drove with the other.

                YongGuk shrugged. “I would have figured it out.” He glanced at me. “You could have told me.”

                I stared at him in disbelief for a second before glancing down at my hands. “I know that now. Sorry.” I whispered.

                The car got silent for a second.

                “I’m serious, Hana, sit down.” Himchan finally said. Hana huffed at him, before sliding down in her seat and turning around and sitting in the seat the correct way. She reached over and turned the radio on, blasting it to full volume. While Hana and Himchan sang along in loud voices, YongGuk and I stayed silent, staring out the windows and avoiding each other’s eyes.

                Who would have thought this time last night we were actually bonding like old times?

                This was just a reminder that it was never going to be the same between us.

                No matter how much we tried to pretend.

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I'M GOING TO SLEEP NOW!!!!!!!!

goodnight ^^

enjoy this short chapter :)

thanks for reading!