He scoffed and grabbed the pillow out of my hand, sticking it under his head.

                “Come on now, Dani.”  He slid over a little, away from me.  I wiggled closer to his side and put my head on the spot he left for me on the pillow.  “You could never be replaced.”

                “Well, duh, I didn’t mean that,” I jeered.  Yes, I did.  “I just meant, your flavor of the week is lasting a bit longer, isn’t it?”

                The smile that spread across his face made me more nauseous than the scene in that slasher flick where the killer used the hack saw on that one guy’s limbs.

                “I don’t know.  I just really like her.  She’s cool.  There’s something about her, I think.”

                “She’s hot.”  Damn her.

                He snickered.  “Yeah, that too.”

                Well if I wore cutsey, girlie outfits, I could be hot too.  Skirts, fitted tees, dangly necklaces to draw attention to my chest – or lack thereof.  I never wished my school had a uniform requirement before.  International schools in Seoul usually take on the mentality of American schools.  Which generally mean a lenient dress code.

                Subtly glancing down at my trademark baggy clothes, I fought the urge to roll my eyes.  Who was I kidding?

                “Why isn’t she your girlfriend yet then?” I asked as plainly as I could.  I slipped my arms under my back so he wouldn’t see my hands shaking.

                He shrugged, sliding an arm under my head.  “I’m working on it,” he stated.

                I closed my eyes after seeing he had closed his.  We lay there a moment longer, listening to the forgotten variety show on my TV that I’d forgotten to turn off before I left for school that morning, not saying a word.

                “How do you feel?” he finally asked.

                My eyes snapped open and I glanced over at him.  His eyes were still closed.  “What do you mean?”

                “From your psychotic run after school today,” he reminded me a little irritated.  He had yet to open his eyes, but his eyebrows furrowed and he frowned.  “Don’t your legs hurt?  Your body must be exhausted.  You shouldn’t push yourself so hard like that.  You’ll get do damage to your muscles.”

                “Oh…”  I was about to tell him I was fine, but then an idea clarified in my head.  I flipped onto my stomach and pulled my legs underneath me, wrapping my arms around my head.  “Ow,” I moaned.  “Everything hurts.”  I turned my face up a bit to see him eyeing me skeptically.  “Owie…rub my shoulders?”

                “What was it you said to me when I asked you for a back rub...?” he mused.  “Oh, yeah, you told me to rub my own back.  Rub your own shoulders.”  He smirked.  I hated when he did that.  I loved his mouth.  God, could I be any sicker?

                I sat up on my legs and pouted.  He stuck his tongue out at me.  “No fair.  It’s only funny when I say stuff like that to you.”

                I could see his stubbornness fading.  “Alright,” he conceded.  “Come on.”  He sat up and moved to the head of my bed with his back against the wall.  He patted his thigh.  I sat between his legs with my back against his chest.  He felt around for the remote and changed the TV channels until he came to a rerun of an American sitcom before he began massaging my shoulders.

                A few seconds in, I could feel my eyelids growing heavy.  Every muscle in my body relaxed.  I closed my eyes, but I fought hard not to fall asleep.  I didn’t want him to have the chance to sneak out.  Since he hadn’t been one for sleepovers these days.  Sure, he’d still sneak in so we could hang out and chat, but he’d left the past few times in the middle of the night before the subways closed.

                Stupid Natalie.

                He must have thought I really did fall asleep because he stopped massaging my shoulders.  I heard him resume channel surfing.  He didn’t move me or make any attempt to get up, so I remained ‘asleep.’

                I felt the vibrations from his cell phone in his back pocket through the mattress.  He cursed quietly and his fingers stopped combing through my hair.  He shifted ever so slightly to pull out his phone.

                “Hello?” he said just above a whisper.  I strained to hear who was on the other line but since I lacked super human hearing, I couldn’t even catch bits of the other side of the conversation. 

                “Hey, yeah…” He paused to listen to the speaker.  “Oh, man, I want to and I would but…”  His fingers started toying again with strands of my hair, absentmindedly.  “I’m kind of exhausted.  I had these tests in chem and calculus today, they really kicked my .” 

                Liar, I thought.  He would have told me if he had tests today.  I’m the only one who can get that procrastinating jock to study more than 20 minutes. 

                “Yeah, this weekend then.  I’ll call you tomorrow, Nat...”  Natalie!  I should have known!  “Cool, sounds good.  Ok, bye.”

                I heard his phone shut and I felt him stretch and move a little.  I could only imagine he was trying to put his phone on my night table rather than try to fit it back into his pocket without waking me.  I tried to relax my eyelids so he couldn’t tell I was still wide awake.

                His chest expanded and fell with a heavy sigh.  “See Dani?  I’d never replace you,” he whispered, sliding his hand over my forehead and down my hair.  “So I don’t know why you’ve been acting different lately.  You’ve been acting, off, I guess.  But it could just be me.  Maybe I’m imagining things.  I mean, you must know how important you are to me.”

                He paused as if he were waiting for me to argue with him.  “I do kind of like her though,” he continued.  In my head, I ran through every swear word I knew in Korean and in English when I heard the soft honesty in his voice.  “It’s different from those other ones.  All those other ones.”  He laughed once lightly.  “But you.  You’re my favorite person in the world.  I trust you more than anyone.  If you tell me you don’t like Natalie or you don’t think we’re good together, I’ll stop.  I don’t want to be with anyone you don’t approve of.  You’re a girl.  You know girls better than me.”

                God, Ji Ho, just twist the knife a little more why don’t you?  Then yank it out of my chest and pour some salt on the bleeding wound.

                Ok, I decided when I felt him adjust my shirt which had bunched up when he pulled away from me.  I’m going to stop being an immature, whiny little brat.  If Natalie is what Ji Ho wants and he needs my help again, I’m going to help him!  I heard him click off the TV and then he disappeared.  From behind my eyelids, I saw the lights in my room go out.  The mattress sagged under his weight when he crawled back into bed and slipped his arm back under my head.

                Whatever it takes, I’ll help him.  I won’t like it and it very well may kill me, but I’ll do it.