Chapter 2.
Fine Feathers Don't Make Fine Birds
Swallowing his pride, Luhan went for another session, only to apologize for the way he had acted the day before though. No way in hell is Luhan going to admit that he has depression when he obviously doesn’t. Luhan knocked and waited for Doctor Lee’s deep voice only for a much higher one to respond.
“The door is unlocked.” Interested as to why Doctor Lee isn’t here today, Luhan decided to open the door and take a step inside. “Oh, you must be Doctor Lee’s three o’clock, you’re Luhan right?”
Luhan made his way inside and nodded.
“Yes, I’m Luhan, and who may I ask, are you?”
“Ah, right sorry, where are my manners? I’m an intern for Doctor Lee, my name is Wong Meiyin, please do just call me Meiyin.” Meiyin brought her hands up for Luhan to shake, looking up at his eyes expectantly the entire time. Not wanting to be rude and scaring off a poor intern Luhan decided to be a gentlemen just this one time and returned the gesture by shaking her hand.
“Hi, Meiyin, it’s nice to meet you.”
“It’s nice to me you too Luhan. I’m sorry that Doctor Lee isn’t here right now, he’s at a conference in Shanghai right now but he’ll be back next week.” Luhan’s body tensed at the mention of that city, catching Meiyin by surprise. She pretended not to notice though, unsure of what Luhan’s condition is like and why he had reacted in such a way. I’ll need to get to know him better first.
“That’s alright; I guess I’ll just go then.”
“Wait!” Luhan stopped and eyed Meiyin curiously.
“Yes?”
“If you don’t mind, you can talk to me instead. I’ve been helping out with most of Doctor Lee’s patients, that is, if they’re comfortable with disclosing their personal information with an intern like me. I understand if you’d rather not though.” Luhan thought about it for a bit before sitting down again. I guess, it wouldn’t hurt to talk to her…
“So how about we start with you telling me a little about yourself. You can tell me whatever you’re comfortable with Luhan.”
Sitting in the back of the lecture hall, Luhan stared into space while listening to his music. Like always, the profs ignored him and left him alone to do whatever he wished. When classes finally ended Luhan found himself looking forward to his session with Meiyin. He has had two sessions with her so far and never has she ever pushed him for more information. She’d simply sit there and listened intently as Luhan talked about himself. They weren’t all that important really, he just talked about the things he did during the day and such during their first session. By the second one though he had told her about how his mother had forced him to come here in the first place. Before Luhan knew it, he found himself opening up a little to Meiyin, it was nice to have someone to talk to again.
“Hi Luhan, how was your day?”
“Boring.”
“Your classes?”
“Also boring haha.” The corner of Meiyin’s lips rose at Luhan’s light chuckle, well that was a first.
“Is the content too easy for you or are they simply not of your interest?”
“Probably a little bit of both.”
“Mmm, I see… ever thought about changing a few of your classes?”
“Not really.”
“Why not?”
“Never really had an interest in studying, I just need to get the degree so I can take over my father’s company.” Jackpot.
“Oh, I see… Is that something you want though Luhan?”
“Maybe, maybe not. I’ve never really wanted anything and it’s not like I hate the idea either, I guess I’ve just come to accept it.”
“And you’re okay with it?”
“More or less yeah. It’s no big deal really, it’s only normal for me to take over.” Never mind, I guess there’s something else that’s triggering the depression, though this is a good first step.
“Hmm, alright then. Is there anything else you’d like to talk about Luhan?”
“Not today, though I wouldn’t mind if you told me a bit about yourself. You know, maybe it’ll help me open up a bit more if I know what you’re like.” Meiyin thought about it for a second before nodding, anything to help him open up.
“Sure, ask away Luhan.”
Luhan’s mother has started to notice some changes in her son’s behaviour and they’re good changes too. She hasn’t seen him smile genuinely for so long now, and it hurt her so much knowing that she wasn’t able to help him. Her once outgoing son, the boy who enjoyed playing soccer with his friends, the one who would befriend someone no matter what their status was and the boy who would joke around all the time brightening their empty homes dark atmosphere had changed so much ever since High School came around, the same time that Zhang Yixing had left for Shanghai. He started to look down on others and grew arrogant due to the popularity he had amongst his classmates. He had never cared about dressing in brand name until then, often refusing to wear clothes that weren’t of the highest quality. Soon his circle of friends changed as well, he only associated himself with those he deemed worthy. Most of them didn’t even like each other, simply friends by name. Luhan’s mother sighed as she looked at an old picture of a ten year old Luhan with a nine year old Yixing smiling next to him. She still remembers how they would set up a campfire in the backyard of this very house, telling each other scary stories before their topic would switch to their own hopes, dreams and fears. The two had never imagined life without the other. I guess your departure had a bigger impact on Luhan than we expected.
“Hi Luhan, how was your day?”
“The usual.”
“Boring?”
“Yep.”
Although there hasn’t been much progress in Luhan’s life at school Meiyin noticed that Luhan’s tone when he spoke changed and the empty look in his eyes started to have life in them. If only I knew what was really wrong though, I could help him with so much more.
“How was your day, Meiyin?”
“Busy but it’s alright since I’m doing something I love. Thank you for asking Luhan.”
“Mmm, okay.”
“Hey Luhan, how do you feel about me asking you some questions this session?”
“Yeah sure, why not?” Meiyin took in a deep breath to calm herself down before speaking up. She has been doing a good job with Doctor Lee’s other patients so far and she’s hoping Luhan would be the same.
“Why do you continue coming here for the sessions when you feel like Doctor Lee’s diagnosis is wrong? Do you perhaps, have something else that’s bothering you?” Luhan was taking a back slightly by Meiyin’s question, he hadn’t thought about it that way.
“… No. Like I said, I’m only here cause of my mother.”
“You can simply tell her it hasn’t been working. I mean, if you really didn’t think that anything is wrong you wouldn’t have come here in the first place right?”
“I… I can see what you’re trying to do and no, I’m sorry but whatever it is that you’re thinking, you’re wrong. I’m only here until the end of the month to prove to my mother that everything is in fact alright. I’ve told you this already Meiyin, I thought you were listening.” Luhan didn’t know why but he was started to grow extremely frustrated at Meiyin’s questions.
“Alright, I’m sorry if I offended you in anyway Luhan but please do feel free to tell me if there’s anything on your mind though.”
“There isn’t.”
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