Okay. I honestly don't know what to do anymore! 

Grrrrrr.

Alright. Imma start from the top. 

Mkay.

So. Let's pick up from where we last left off, shall we? So, Chan just told me that he didn't want to date in high school and my highest hopes and dreams were crushed. Oh wait a sec, I'm not even allowed to date in high school, what was I thinking?

After that party, we texted a little bit, but I really felt that I was guiding the entire conversation... it kind of really . It just felt so forced, you know? It wasn't natural, AT ALL. And to be honest, I did not feel very comfortable. These feelings made me start liking Chan... a lot less. A LOTTTT LESS. Which makes me sad, but at the same time, I should be grateful. Hadn't I wanted to get over Chan?

Anyway. Now, it's March and the Ashville High School Music Program went on a huge field trip for a music competition. In upstate New York, we would be competing against nationwide orchestras and there would be a celebration/awards ceremony after. I played the violin, like any other stereotypical, good Asian girl. K LAUGH ALL YOU WANT RIGHT NOW. I DARE YOU. AIGHT?

Let me tell you, I absolutely love my orchestra friends. Back way when, I was a little embarrassed and ashamed of being part of something... not exactly "cool". Butttt, I've learned to love it. I appreciate them and they do understand me very well. Plus, they're not typical orchestra members portrayed as nerds. Yes, they challenge themselves academically, but c'mon, they do know how to have a good time. So, I was super excited.

So like 5 hours later, we left school on Friday to upstate New York to stay at the Hilton hotel. It was beautiful, to say the least. We checked into our rooms at like 11 PM since we already went out to dinner and everything, and we were too exhausted to stay up or anything. That next morning, we dressed in our concert attire, prepared our instruments, and got ready for our competition. We weren't expecting to win, since we were good for our area, but nationwide, we weren't ranked with the rest of the orchestras. BUT WHATEVA. I was only excited for the ceremony at the end.

Sooo. We played alright at the competition. Not our best, but the acoustics of the stage sounded absolutely stunning and beautiful.

All in all, it was a very positive and educational experience. And it helped me forget about my life back in suburban and smalltown Ashville stuck in the middle of nowhere New Jersey where the only boy I could possibly set my sights on was Chan Lee. 

Ohhh. There were plenty of cute, Asian boys here at the competition. Mhmmm. Indeed.

Fast forward after a whole day of boring orchestra stuff, us girls got ready for the ceremony. 

I love love love dressing up and getting all dolled up. I think it's so fun to kinda pretend to be someone else just for one night and forget everything. So Shelley, I, and my other orchestra buddies: Lily, Brielle, and Jamie put on fancy dresses and did each others' make-up. I was sooo stoked for this party.

When we walked down the steps of our hotel lobby, the guys turned around and their mouths dropped open... just a littleee. Min smiled extra nice at me. 

Gahhhh. I love looking nice and feeling someone appreciated. Who doesn't?