“You didn’t have to walk me all the way to the door Oppa. I could have made it in safely by myself.” I say as we reach the door of CF 23. “It’s fine Arian “Nice to meet you Arianna and welcome to the YG family!” na-ah. I was heading to this floor anyways.” “JiOppa is JJANG!” I exclaim as I jump him for a hug. His chuckle vibrated my shoulder as he laid his head on it. Butterflies started hatching inside my stomach and I could feel their wings flap through my system. Something just felt right about being in his embrace. The smell of his cologne made my heart beat out of time. I don’t know why this is happening to me but something about this just feels right…

Jiyong's POV
“JiOppa is JJANG!!” she yelled and hugged me with a vice like grip. I chuckled at her silliness and hugged her back. Her long black hair smelt like strawberries… If I could, I would stay in this spot forever. We stayed like this for a few minutes until she jumped like she saw a ghost. She quickly let go, bowed, said bye and went into the room. That was weird… “Oppa!” a female called out to me from behind. The mirror at the end of the hall reflected Jenny walking towards me. Ugh not her again. I swear she keeps a tracker on me cuz I see her everywhere. Please don’t catch up to me. Please don’t… I try my best to walk as fast as I can to the restroom but she is coming way too fast for me to make it in time. She’s like a cheetah chasing after her prey. “OPPAAAA!!!!” before I know it, I’m being tackled to the ground. Noooooooo!!!!! “There you are Oppa!” I push her off of me and stand up. “yes. Here I am but I am super late right now and I gotta go..” I say trying to escape from her but she has a strong grip on my wrist practically chained me to her. “oh! Where are you going?! I’ll walk you there.” she offered with an obsessed expression on her face. “it’s okay. I actually really need to go to the bathroom which happens to be right here! Oh well, nature calls!” I say then rushed into the restroom. Aish! That girl is Cray.

Arianna's POV
I sat down in my designated seat with the help of the placards that labeled everyone’s seats. My placard was the only one that wasn’t written in Korean which made it easy to spot my seat. I just sat in my seat and read the packet that was placed at my spot. Good thing it was in English! Slowly, the room got more crowded as more and more staff entered. It was pretty loud from all the conversations that I did not understand but once YG entered, the whole room became almost silent. Following YG was 2NE1. My inner fangirl wanted to go nuts but i tried my best to keep calm. How the hell can I keep calm when 2NE1 is right there?!?!?! YG greeted everyone one by one and introduced the girls. The closer they got, the more uneasy I became. For some reason Minzy kept looking at me. When she looked away, CL would look at me n whisper to the others. They each took their turn looking at me until it was my turn to be greeted. “Hello Arianna-ah, glad you could make it to the first meeting.” YG said with a smile. “Hello sir! I am glad to be able to attend today’s meeting sir!” “I want you to meet 2NE1, this is CL, Bom, Dara and Minzy.” “Annyongsaeyo!” they said in unison. “Annyongsaeyo! Ariannaimnida.” I replied and bowed. “Oh! So YOU are Arianna. We have heard so much about you!” “Really?!” “Yes! The boys and trainees have mentioned you a few times.” in a good way I hope… “Ahh..” I gave a nervous chuckle. “Our Arianna-ah has a bright future ahead of her here.” YG smiled and greeted the next person.CL welcomed kindly. I bowed as they each passed by me. I wonder what everyone is saying about me… Whatever it is that 2NE1 has heard, it got them to notice me.

For a few minutes I just sat in my seat, wondering who and what said things about me until the meeting started. YG stood up and said “First off, I would like say congratulations to Chaerin-ah, Bom-ah, Dara-ah and Minji-ah for your hard work and achieving your first world tour! From the moment I meet you four, I knew you girls had so much potential. You guys have exceeded everyone’s expectations and this is why you girls deserve this tour. As you all know, BigBang also is planning their world tour while everyone is still preparing for the 15th YG Family Concert that is coming up in a matter of months. Next year will be a very busy year so please look forward to next years activities. For the concert, I have personally asked an American band and company to assist in the concert preparations. They won’t arrive until December but I have requested to have webcam practices with the band and Lauren until then. This meeting is meant to introduce everyone so we will start out with the girls. Chaerin-ah please introduce yourself.” She stood up from her seat with a big smile. “Annyonghasaeyo Chaerinimnida! I am the leader of 2NE1 and in charge of rap/vocal. Thank you all for coming out and helping this world tour, which has been my dream, become a reality. Katsamnida!” “Hello I am Park Bom, I am in charge of vocals in 2NE1.” One by one, everyone introduced themselves. When the person besides me finished her introduction, my mind went blank. Everyone had their eyes glued on me and I could feel my nerves erasing my mini speech from my brain. There was an awkward silence until YG reminded me that it was my turn. A few girls whispered to each other in the corner of the room and my confidence disappeared out of thin air. With wobbly unstable legs, I lifted myself from the chair and opened my mouth.

“Hello. I- I’m A-Arianna Ca-Canosa. I am a new trainee and will serve as a backup singer. This is my first time being in such a great activity so please look after me. Thank you.” I bowed and sat down with my head low. Whew. That was hella scary. I didn’t dare to look at anyone in the eye so I listened to the rest of the meeting with my head down. “Here is the set list so start practicing your hangul Arianna-ah.” YG said as he handed an English copy to me personally. “Neh! I will rehearse hard.” I say sincerely. He walked back to the front and said “this meeting is over. We will meet again in two weeks in this room.” YG was the first to leave and everyone followed him out except for 2NE1. They were still in their seats discussing other tour details. As I walked pass them, I bowed and smiled at the four. But as soon an I turned towards the door, I hear CL call out my name. I did a quick spin on my heels and walk up to them. “Arianna, are you in a rush?” CL said in perfect English. Out of the four of them, she speaks the best english. “No. Not really. I was actually just going to find a place to practice the set list.” “Oh, well sit with us and we could help you.” I took her offer and sat across from them. Each of them had a bright smile on their faces that I couldn’t help but smile back at them. “So Arianna-ah, how did you get accepted into YG?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Alright one more take.” I took a breath and pressed record. This was the two millionth time rerecording this song and it was already 1am. As the intro played, all my focus was on hitting all the right notes because if I mess up again, I don’t think I’ll get any sleep.

Tired of being alone
Sick of being single
I think I need me a boy
I need a boy like

senggak omnun mal tu
orinedul malgu nal
gamsa anajul yeh~
shimshim haltte gakeum
nonun aedul mal gu
naman saranghejul

gamanissodo danyeojadeul
jeonhwagil naemiljiman
jarangseureopge nae sajineul
keonae boinungeureon

boy i need a boy
mwol hedo ipeun
momae do ipeun
boy i need a boy
baby i need you
boy you need me too

syojuboda buinekidojal eoulrinun keureon namja
kimchi bokkeum babeun naega jal maga daesin jal mandul su innun namja
naika manhado daeron kyuyun namja nan gureon namjaga johdeora
namjadaoun cheok hamyeon sodo

somseo haljuk anun boy
pyeongsoen sikkeuhancheokhaedo

dulman isseumyeon

boy i need a boy
mwol hedo ipeun
momae do ipeun
boy i need a boy
baby i need you
boy you need me too

dashi nae ga sumeumeul dweke hae jwo
dashi dalkomhan no rael mandeulke haejwo

you know donina mwo dan ji keu reon ke anya
naemameul jugo shipeun saram

i need a boy uhmm yeah yeah
boy like you gotta make you mine
I’ma treat you right baby

boy i need a boy
mwol hedo ipeun
momae do ipeun
boy i need a boy
baby i need you
boy you need me too

boy I need a boy yeah
nae mareul deutgo inni
baby I need you boy you need me too
boy I need a boy

(I Need a Girl - Taeyang IU version)

SUCCESS! Finaaaally!!!! Now all I gotta do is stay up another hour to upload it… As I edited the clips and added the harmony, I receive an e-mail. Once the first part was done, I checked my inbox. Weird that someone would email me so late.

Hello Miss Canosa,
I and a few other talent scouts have recognized your talent through videos on YouTube. Due to high demands from a few of our staff, I would like to offer you a position as a back up singer for 2NE1’s 2012 world tour. Based on your videos, I am sure you know who they are. Yang hyun-suk and I look forward to hearing your feedback. Please fill out the application attached if you are serious about accepting the position. Thank you for putting this offer into consideration.

Sincerely, YG Entertainment Talent Scout
Kwong Chae Hee

I reread the letter five times before it finally sinks in. OH EMM GEE!!!!!!!!! ASDFGHJKL!!!!! Out of excitement I start jumping up and down like crazy. My body wanted to run a marathon around San Jose to celebrate. This feels sooo unreal! Why would they choose me?! Out of all the hundreds of talented singers, they chose ME! My videos on YouTube aren’t THAT popular… I only did these videos because I like the songs and wanted to sing it in English. Anne’s encouragement to start doing those videos is finally paying off. That night, I absolutely didn’t get any sleep. Everytime I think about it, my heart beats ten thousand times faster and my excitement CANNOT stop. Trying to keep calm is impossible although I try my best to conceal my feels out of fear that someone is watching from a far. Once I do calm down, I think about my family and if they would even let me… Going on tour for a year would break my grandma’s heart and I know my dad wouldn’t allow it. My dad is so against me pursuing music. When I was younger, I would have a lot of band concerts, choir performances and after school rehearsals but my dad would never want to go. Anything that had to do with him having doing something for me or my sister that doesn’t benefit him, he wont want to do it.

When I finally showed him the email and my videos, he stayed silent and shook his head. “How long have you been making these videos?” “For almost a year… I rewrite kpop songs into English and sing it my own way. Some videos are choreographed and I dance in them. So far I have around a thousand subscribers…” I say quietly hoping that he would be impressed but his expression did not change one bit. “So that’s why you spend most of your time in your room. What is this YG Entertainment? Who’s 2NE1? Why do they want you?” that last question hurt me a little but I already saw it coming. “It is a very famous music company in South Korea and 2NE1 is a girl group signed to YG. I guess they saw my videos and they want me to be a backup singer for their world tour…” “World tour?!?! Korea?!?! Are you nuts? You aren't even a professional.” no. You are. “Yeah I know that but they want ME. They specifically messaged me. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity that I refuse not taking. I would not even tell you about this if I wasn’t completely sure about it. Dad, I need to do this.” “No. You can’t leave. You are still only 16 and you still need parental supervision! Don’t think I’m going to let you do this.” he laughed a sinister laugh and said “Do you really think you can make a living off of this? What makes you think you are the best and that YOU could be a ‘Popstar?’ Get your head out of the clouds!” The tears started to blur my vision but I can’t let him see me weak. My emotions inside were boiling together. All the anger and frustration and sadness in me wanted to pour out of my eyes in tears. I took a deep breath to calm down a little. “I believe in my dreams. God has given me this gift and this opportunity. There is no way that I will let this pass me by. I may not be a pop star or anything but I will be doing the thing I love and am best at. This is where my heart is and God is telling me to follow through. It’s not about the money or anything. This is about me and my dream.” “See?! You are just dreaming! Wake up to reality!” “This is reality! My dream is turning into reality! Nothing and no one will stop me. No matter what anyone says, I will make a decision for myself because at the end of the day I am the one is affected by it. Either let me fly or let me fall. If this opens up more doors for me then I know that I made the right choice. But if it falls through the floor, then it will be a lesson learned. Please dad… I need to do this for me…” "Get out then. If you want to go through with it, then get out of this house."he sighed and walked away. Once he was out of my room, a waterfall of tears fell. After a good five minutes, I knelt down next to my bed and prayed. “Lord, I pray that you hear me now. You know my situation and my heart but I pray my dad would get an understanding. Thank you for blessing me with this gift and this opportunity. In your name, I proclaim that I will be a singer at that concert! In your name, I can make my dream come true!” With that, I regained the strength to start practicing.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Ahh.” they said in unison. “oh yeah. YG showed me one of your videos. He really sees a lot of potential in you Arianna-ah.” “So does a lot of the Oppas and Unnies.” “Jincha?” “Neh. So do we. If it’s not too much but can you please perform a song for us?” “Right now?” a large lump in my throat grew and it made swallowing my saliva harder. I am soooo not prepared!!! I didn’t even practice…. They each gave me a puppy dog face, anticipating my performance. “ummm… Okay.” “Yaaay!” I grabed a nearby guitar and placed my seat the center of a clear spot.

I get out, I get out of all your boxes
I get out, you can't hold me in these chains
I'll get out
Father free me from this
Knowin' my condition
Is the reason I must change

Your stinkin' resolution
Is no type of solution
Preventin' me from freedom
Maintainin' your pollution
I won't support your lie no more
I won't even try no more
If I have to die, oh Lord
That's how I choose to live
I won't be compromised no more
I can't be victimised no more
I just don't sympathize no more
Cause now I understand
You just wanna use me
You say "love" then abuse me
You never thought you'd loose me
But how quickly we forget
That nothin' is for certain
You thought I'd stay here hurtin'
Your guilt trip's just not workin'
Repressin' me to death
Cause now I'm choosin' life, yo
I take the sacrifice, yo
If everything must go, then go
That's how I choose to live

No more compromises
I see past your disguises
Blindin' through mind control
Stealin' my eternal soul
Appealin' through material
To keep me as your slave

But I get out
Oh, I get out of all your boxes
I get out
Oh, you can't hold me in these chains
I'll get out
Oh, I want out of social
Knowin' my condition
Oh, is the reason I must change

See, what you see is what you get
Oh, and you ain't seen nothin' yet
Oh, I don't care if you're upset
I could care less if you're upset
See it don't change the truth
And your hurt feeling's no excuse
To keep me in this box
Psychological locks
Repressin' true expression
Cementin' this repression
Promotin' mass deception
So that no one can be healed
I don't respect your system
I won't protect your system
When you talk I don't listen
Oh, let my Father's will be done

And just get out
Oh, just get out of all these
Just get out
Oh, you can't hold me in chains
Just get out
All these traditions killin' freedom
Knowin' my condition
Is the reason I must change

I've just accepted what you said
Keepin' me among the dead
The only way to know
Is to walk then learn and grow
But faith is not your speed
Oh, you've had everyone believed
That you're the sole authority
Just follow the majority
Afraid to face reality
The system is a joke
Oh, you'd be smart to save your soul
Oh, when escape is mind control
You spent your life in sacrifice
To a system for the dead
Oh, are you sure...
Where is the passion in this living
Are you sure it's God you servin'
Obligated to a system
Getting less then you're deserving
Who made up these schools, I say
Who made up these rules, I say
Animal conditioning
Oh, just to keep us as a slave

Oh, just get out
Of this social purgatory
Just get out
All these traditions are a lie
Just get out
Superstition killing freedom
Knowin' my condition
Is the reason I must die
Just get out
Just get out
Just get out
Let's get out
Let's get out
Knowin' my condition
Is the reason I must die
Just get out

(I Get Out - Lauryn Hill)

They gave a big round of applause and chanted “ARIANNA FIGHTING FIGHTING FIGHTING!!!!” My cheeks became cherry red and I couldn’t help but break out in tears. “Arianna-ah?! Why are you crying?!” Bom asked as they all rushed over to comfort me. “I’m sorry. I’m just really happy. This whole thing is so unbelievable!!!” ”Well Arianna, start believing and just know that you have worked hard to get here. This is the hard work beginning to pay off.” hmm… They are right. This didn’t get happen by just sitting around and wishing for this to happen. I remember all those sleepless nights of writing lyrics and the hours I spent singing my off just to get better each time. I remember the moment I first fell in love with music. And I remember when I realized that singing and performing is what I’m meant to do. This why I am here today! “Katsamnida Unnies.” again they wrapped their arms around me and a bunch of relief came off my shoulders. I love my YG Family!

We returned to the table and the girls talking about their trainee lives and gave me some advice. Dara showed me picture of her and Minzy back when they were still trainees. “Wow! You were only 11?!” “Neh.” “My little cousin Katie is only 11 but she looks like she’s 16.” I showed them a pic of us before I left. “Omo! She’s only 11?!” “Neh.” Katie is my favorite little cousin. We have a ToDae like relationship. Me being TOP because I’m older, taller, and like to choom randomly while she laughs her off at me. I am always teasing her and it’s like we are little kids. But she likes to tease me about my chinky eyes. I hella miss her… When the girls and I went our separate ways, I decided to go on the roof to take a breather.

As the door swung open, a cool breeze hit me. I inhaled the fresh unfamiliar air and let out a sigh. The Han River sparkled as the bright yellow sun watches over. “AHHH!” Using my diaphragm, I let out another relieving scream. Birds near by flew away and I watched their pretty wings take them higher into the sky. “Lucky you. You can spread your wings and fly anywhere they take you.” My hand searched for a long brown stick that my body craved. I fought the urge to bring the poison to my lips by focusing on the sky. Someday I will spread my wings and fly just like those birds. I sat down on the cold concrete blocks and admired the view until the door beside me opened. “Yah! What are you doing here by yourself?” “Thinking. What are you doing up here?” “I just came up for a smoke. What are you thinking about?” he stuck his hand in his pocket and pulled out a red carton. “How it would be like to have wings and fly.” “Hmm..” he took a cigaret out, put it in his mouth and lit the end. “Smoking is bad for you, just saying.” I said teasingly. Part of me was joking and the other part was serious. He looked out at the view and said “I know.” “Oppa, this won’t be easy huh?” I watched the smoke escape his lips. It’s like waves swirling in the ocean then vanishing into thin air. “No. No it won’t. But one day it will all pay off.” I hope so. My hand found the stick in my pocket again. Some would see it as poison but I see it as something neither beneficial nor harmful. This is a secret that no one here can find out about. Especially him but being beside him made fighting the urge practically effortless. We sat silently on the cold block while admiring the view. Soon my mind was no longer on the object in my pocket and focused on the man beside me. I studied the way his face was constructed when he was deep in contemplation. His eyebrows furred together while the rest of his face seemed flawless. He must have been thinking of a memory because a smirk grew on his handsome face. If you were to split his face in half, I’d look like one side is smiling and the other nonchalant. What is he thinking about? “Which view is better?” He said letting me know that I got caught staring at him. “um.. Errr.. Uhhh… I gotta go.” I stood up as fast as I could but before I could leave, his hand grabs my wrist. A tingle from his contact shot through my body. “Wae? I feel like you are running away from me.” “I’m not running away from you. I just have to go.” “Kajima...” the sincerity in his voice made me want to glue my feet to the spot beside him. I wont leave you. I don’t want to. “Sorry Oppa, I really do have to leave but I will see you later! Daesung Oppa invited me over so I’ll see you tonight.” He let go of my wrist and looked at the ground with a sad expression. Before he could say anything, I headed back inside. This can’t be. He is your Senior! You can’t develop feelings for him! Imagine all the VIPs who would hate your guts and don’t forget Jenny! She would make my life hell. GDragon is the most sought after man in all of South Korea. Who the hell am I? Just a girl from California that is all I’ll ever be… For now.