Chapter Ten
Soul Searching (JeTi)Aren't I updating too fast? LMAO
Chapter 10
Where are you?
Library.
Because the library isn’t big at all. _ _”
Lol! Third floor, at the very end. Study rooms! :3
“Now was that hard to say?” The blonde raised her brow as she leaned on the door. She was able to locate Tiffany since the walls for the study rooms were made of glass, making it convenient for everyone - especially those who were looking for people.
The lifeguard looked up, smiling at Jessica, who had her arms crossed. “Sorry. I wasn’t thinking,” she said as she gathered her things together to have lunch with Jessica.
“When did you ever?” the blonde murmured as she took steps towards her friend, helping her friend gather her things - all the pens that scattered on the table to a case. “Do you really need different colored pens?”
As the lifeguard organized her notes in order, she said, “It helps me study better.”
When they were done fixing Tiffany’s things, they started to walk towards the the cafe where Sunny worked at. And while walking, Jessica explained that the others had classes until one thirty, and they would be alone. After that, their conversation led to how tiring the day was despite it still being early. They both sighed when one mentioned they still had some more classes to go.
When they reached the restaurant, Sunny greeted them in a perky tone and led them to their booth, leaving menus on the table for them to look at. “I’ll be right back,” she said as she tended to other patrons.
“I hate waking up early,” Jessica complained.
“It’s not that bad.”
When Sunny came back, Jessica settled to ordering chicken alfredo fettuccine, while Tiffany asked for lasagna. Whilst waiting for their food, Jessica told Tiffany that she already emailed the girl’s resume and report card to Mister Im. The blonde was adamant about this whole ordeal. As a friend, she wanted to help Tiffany the best way she could, and she figured that having the company she already worked for sponsor her schooling, the girl wouldn’t be able to resist. The lifeguard was a nice person, and the blonde just wanted to give a helping hand. The lifeguard told her once that she didn’t want to burden her parents for wanting to study out of the country, that was why she worked at the hotel for her needs. If the scholarship were to happen, Tiffany’s parents would no longer have to worry about tuition fees or anything like that.
“You know, if you’re accepted in this program, you wouldn’t have to work until you graduate?” Jessica stated as she sipped on her soda. “They’ll give you allowance too. So you should be good from here on.”
Tiffany nodded. “That’s really nice. But I don’t want to think about it and psych myself up.” She didn’t want to be disappointed when they tell her she didn’t get into the program. Another defeat in her life? Not anytime soon. She probably needed a break from disappointments, and so she didn’t let herself think of this as though she already got it, despite Jessica’s help.
“You need to let loose, okay?” Jessica flashed a sweet smile. “You’ll get it.”
“Nope. Nope. Nope.” Tiffany was smiling, but was shaking her head. Like what she said earlier, she didn’t want to have her hopes up. Why should she? It was still up in the air whether or not she would get the scholarship. It would be nice to get it, but it was also hard to think of something she didn’t even have yet.
“You will get it,” the blonde said repeatedly, enjoying every second of this. “Hwang Tiffany will be the new scholar.”
“Nope. Stop! Stop!” Tiffany kept repeating this as she tried to cover Jessica’s mouth, but the blonde was playfully dodging, swatting them with her hands.
“Should I start calling you a scholar?”
Giving up, Tiffany just leaned back on her chair, trying to be comfortable. “How about if I don’t get it? I’ll be depressed, and it’ll be all on you.” She finished as she crossed her arms on her chest. “Will you take responsibility?”
“Woah! Woah! I didn’t get anyone pregnant, I swear!” She waved her hand in front of her while laughing.
“Stupid.”
Jessica then stopped as Sunny brought their food, setting each one respectively. “You guys seem to be having fun,” the waitress said. “I wish I can have fun with you guys, too.” She then pouted as she was tired of working.
“You can sit with us on your break,” Tiffany said as she scooted, making room for Sunny. She then patted the seat beside her. “Come on.”
Shaking her head, the waitress then said, “Thanks, but I just started. I’m just jealous to see both of you having fun.”
“Awwwe, look at Tiffany, treating you like a dog. She figured you’re really a b!tch” Jessica said as she clasped her hands together, smiling at Sunny.
“Here strikes the demoness.” Sunny said as she hugged herself, rubbing her arms. “I’m scared.”
The blonde scoffed. “Quit acting.”
“Why are you always cranky? And when you’re with Tiffany, you’re always so nice and caring. I’m really getting jealous now.” She furrowed her brow, making it clear that she was upset.
“Shut up.” Jessica glared at her. “Go back to work.”
“See how you’re always mean to me?!” Sunny pointed at her.
Tiffany laughed. “You guys are really close, huh?”
“Well, we’ve been friends for awhile now, so we should be.” Jessica said in a factly manner.
Sunny then looked at Tiffany; her face was serious. “Don’t be in this level. If you’re this close to Jessica, she wouldn’t care even if you drop dead in front of her.”
“Yeah, because I’m the grim reaper.”
“Jessi isn’t that bad.” Tiffany looked at Jessica and then back at the waitress. “She’s actually really, really nice.”
“I guess you can say that. I mean, she is nice to you and even laughing and all. You don’t get glares and yells unlike the poor me.” Sunny pouted and crossed her arms.
Waving her hand, trying to shoo her friend away, Jessica then said, “Can you please go back to work? Aren’t you guys busy?” The waitress then nodded, and so the two thanked her for serving them their food.
Tiffany was enjoying her food, and when she finished chewing, she looked at Jessica. “Is it true you’re extra nice to me?”
Raising a brow, Jessica then said, “Where did you get that from?”
“Sunny, Taeyang, and Hyomin.”
The blonde then shrugged. “I don’t think I am. I’m nice to everyone.” She scoffed a chuckle. It was something even she thought was funny. True that the blonde had her nice side, but she showcased more of her sarcastic side than anything.
“Yeah, because I wasn’t tortured by you before. Not at all,” Tiffany rolled her eyes as she remembered their old days when they were enemies.
“Hey! Why do you keep bringing up the past?”
Shrugging, Tiffany then said with a smirk on her face, “I have nothing on you but our past.”
“You make it seem like you actually have sh!t on me.” They didn’t say more and resumed on their meals. When they were almost done, Jessica looked at her hand, feeling the burning sensation.
“How’s your hand?” Tiffany asked as she looked at it, and then met Jessica’s eyes.
Jessica raised it, looking at the burn and remembering her hatred for Taecyeon. “It’ll be better.”
***
The blonde was waiting on Tiffany just outside the latter’s last class. Remembering this boring class when she took it last semester, the former could only imagine how deep Tiffany was in hell. Well, it wasn’t like being with the blonde wasn’t consider one to begin with, but the former was convinced that this was worse than being with her.
The door opened so the blonde looked up to see students leaving one by one, still waiting for her friend. When there were no longer students walking out, Jessica took a peek at the classroom, witnessing her friend and her former teacher, chatting and laughing as though they were having the best conversation. She tried to remember if that professor laughed like that before, but she had no recollection. The only thing she could recall was his boring monotonous voice that still caused her nightmares.
Tiffany caught a glimpse of Jessica standing by the door, and so she bid her professor farewell and headed over to her friend. “Jessi,” she greeted as she was closer. “Were you waiting long?” The blonde simply shook her head and smiled at her. “We were just discussing about our new presentation, so yeah. Sorry for the wait.”
“No need for an apology. Anyway, it’s getting late. Where do you want to eat?”
Tiffany cocked her head to the side. “I thought we’re meeting Sunny and the others somewhere?” She then fished for her phone in her pocket, and then showed the text message to her friend.
“I can’t believe they invited you, and they didn’t inform me.”
“It says to drag you there, so maybe because you’re always cranky that they didn’t bother inviting you.” Tiffany lectured. “Maybe you shouldn’t always be sarcastic, hiding in your shell. Try to stop cussing too.”
“I already have a mom, Babe,” Jessica plainly said.
“Hun, I’m not trying to be your mother.”
Jessica raised her brow, “Then what are you trying to be?”
Tiffany didn’t answer as she looked over Jessica’s shoulder. She couldn’t help but frown, tears threatening to fall. The blonde then followed her gaze only to see Taecyeon with his friends, and maybe what triggered her threatening tears where the girl beside the doucheb@g, who was holding his hand in hers.
“Let’s go, Jessi.” Tiffany said; her voice cracked. The blonde felt Tiffany’s hand on her arm, but her eyes didn’t leave the group. Most of them were familiar faces since they worked as lifeguards at the same hotel as Tiffany. Looking at her burnt hand, Jessica then took in a deep breath as seeing it fueled another spark in Jessica. She couldn’t help but feel upset, seeing Tiffany cry and her burn. This could also be a personal vendetta. “Hey,” she smirked as she quickly raised a brow, trying to act friendly though maintaining a cocky aura as she walked towards them. “Remember me?”
Taecyeon played with his tongue in the walls of his mouth. “I’m not your servant,” he stated.
“I didn’t say you were my slave.” The blonde then looked at one of his friends. “Hey, you.” He nodded her head once towards him, making it clear that she was pertaining to him. “I’m just wondering, are you a Hotel and Restaurant Management student?”
“Ye---”
“What’s it to you?!” Taeyeon exclaimed.
Jessica shrugged. “I don’t know. You tell me, what’s it to me?” She wanted to make Taecyeon feel as much pain as Tiffany did, or even more. And even though this wasn’t really her fight, she wanted to do something for her friend. Seeing the lifeguard cry because of a broken heart once was enough, but seeing her upset every time? That was too much. Jessica was never good at consoling people, even herself. So this was the best way she could help Tiffany. It may not be the best, but it was better than nothing. If anything evil was linked to Jessica, then everything good should be for Tiffany. So she wanted to do the dirty work for her friend.
“Let’s go guys.” Taecyeon told his friends.
Used to playing the bad guy, Jessica didn’t contemplate even for a second. “For you guys who are with Taecyeon studying Finance or HRM, I do advise to not be with this guy.” Jessica clicked her tongue a couple of times, shaking her head. She then placed her pointing finger on her chin, as she rested her elbow on her other arm.
“Who do you think you are?” Taecyeon spat. “Even though you’re rich, you can’t dictate our lives, okay? Get that through that thick skull of yours.”
“Thick skull, eh?” Jessica shrugged. “Who do I think am I?” She looked at each of Taecyeon’s friends in the eyes, as though looking for an answer from there. “Right now, I’m just a student here in the same university like you and your good-for-nothing friends. Nothing special.”
“Let’s go guys. Clearly, this chick’s whacked in the head.” Taecyeon took a step forward, but was stopped when Jessica spoke.
“But in the future, I don’t know.” Jessica let a pretentious chuckle out. “The stars told my family this chick who’s whacked in the head will be the CEO of Jung Group and Companies, and a major shareholder of one of the largest hotel chains on this planet. But of course, that’s still not right now, but once I graduate, I don’t know... the stars might be right.” She finished with a smirk on her face.
“Let’s go guys.”
“I don’t think you want to upset me.” When Jessica said that, some of them stopped from walking. They clearly knew who Jessica was, and the blonde was making a point. Since they were still in college, they wouldn’t want to upset someone who would probably employ them. “My parents’ companies do accept majority of the graduates here simply because I go to this school. You know, it sets a nice standard and all.” She raised her hands to her sides, as though she didn’t know anything. “One word from their princess, your names will be banned from our company. I don’t think you guys want that, no?”
Tiffany then was beside Jessica and held her hand. “Let’s go, Jessi.”
“Oh, so this is how it is? Is it because of Tiffany that you’re doing this? Get a life.” Taecyeon looked at both of them as though disgusted.
“Maybe. Maybe it’s because of the coffee you spilled on me.” Jessica then showed him her hand. “Oh, and by the way, I talked to your uncle, Mister Chung. I told him it’s either he transfer you as a hotel sweeper or he’ll get fired. The moment you quit the company, he should quit as well or my mother will hear about everything. You know, your dear old uncle hid the fact that you’re his nephew to the company, that’s why you got the job and is getting paid the most out of all of you guys? You even get the most convenient hours. You do know what will happen to your uncle when they find out, right?”
“Jessi, sto---”
“I’m not done. You guys are Tiffany’s friends, too, right? So why did you isolate her when they broke up? What kind of friends are you?” Jessica looked the others. “Let me tell you what you are... little sh!ts.” She scoffed. “But then, I’m a very forgiving person. If you leave Taecyeon right now, you will be employed for sure by my family’s company right after graduation. All those student loans you need to worry about, don’t you need a stable job right after college? I’m here, serving them to you in a silver--- silver’s too cheap for me--- golden platter.”
“What do you take us for?!” The girl beside Taecyeon exclaimed, glaring at Jessica.
The blonde shrugged. “I don’t know you too well. But I’m guessing you’re the type of b!tches who would leave their friend just because it’s convenient. Isn’t employment more convenient than being this douchebag’s friend?” She pointed at the said person.
“You think just because you’re an heiress, you can do this to us?!” The same girl said, clearly upset by Jessica’s actions.
“Yes. Yes, I actually do,” was said without any hesitation.
The girl raised her hand, ready to slap Jessica across the face, but was stopped by a guy. “You don’t want to do that. Not only is that assault, but you’ll ruin your future. Her grandfather’s the former supreme judge, so don’t.”
“It’s not our fight, let’s go.” Another said, who was at the back. Slowly, they all walked one at a time, leaving Taecyeon clenching his jaw and balling his fists.
The blonde made sure Taecyeon saw her smirk before she held Tiffany’s hand, dragging her as they headed to her car. “Jes---”
“I really won’t do anything to his friends, okay?” Jessica understood the good in Tiffany, and of course, she didn’t want the lifeguard to think that she would actually be the cause of some people’s lives to be in the gutter. “I just said that to scare them. I want him to feel like no one’s there lik---.”
“You shouldn’t be doing that to them. They have feelings too.” Tiffany said, in a hushed tone. “He needs his friends.”
“And you don’t?!” Jessica exclaimed, letting go of her friend’s hand and then looking back. She couldn’t help but feel as though she was unappreciated. She did all that for her friend, and here her friend was, trying to defend the same people who caused her hurt? Why? What was so special about Taecyeon? He hurt her so bad, and she was still defending him? Stupid! “Tell me, you don’t need your friends? If I’m not here right now... what if I’m not here, you tell me, where will you be? Home? Crying your heart out? Being depressed? Trying to drink? What!?”
“Jes---”
Stomping her foot, Jessica then cried out, “They left you! They left you simply because you guys broke up. What? You’re gonna defend them and tell me they’re not all that bad just like when you defended Taecyeon before? Maybe you need a newsflash in your life and wake up!”
“Why are you so upset?”
“You! Because of you! You’re in annoying!” Jessica then pointed at where they were. “Not everyone is nice, Tiffany. Them? Those people? They hurt you!”
“But you’re nice. You’re not like th---”
“Says you? You don’t know me, Tiffany.”
“I honestly don’t know why you’re being so upset about my life.”
“Maybe because of the fact that when you looked at that b@stard, you still hoped somewhere, wherever, that he’ll still come back.” Jessica then sighed. “Don’t hurt yourself even more. You don’t deserve that.”
Tiffany couldn’t say anything. Even if Taecyeon did cheat on her, even if all of her mind told her to get over him, she still couldn’t right now He did her some good when they were together, and Tiffany couldn’t forget that. Or maybe wouldn’t was better put. Was it hard to hope that it was love that they shared before? Even if it was stupid now, she bought all his lies, and maybe even know she was still convinced somehow.
“I just don’t want to see you crying again,” Jessica was more dejected this time, trying to calm down a little. “I don’t want you hurt anymore.”
“Is that why you’re yelling at me?” Tiffany looked away; not wanting to meet the blonde’s eyes. “You think you’re not hurting me?”
Jessica flailed her hands up in the air. “Blame me! Blame me for trying to look out for you.”
“Let’s just forg--”
“I don’t want you to hurt, Tiffany. Is that so hard to understand?”
“So you try to hurt others for me?” Tiffany looked her in the eyes. “So you’re telling me that you’re trying to be bad for my sake?”
“I’ve always been bad. So it’s not for you.”
“Let’s---”
“Tiffany.” Jessica was trying to collect herself by pacing around. “It annoys me that you’re still in love with someone who you can’t have. I don’t want you to come crying to me because you’re hurt.”
“I won’t come crying to you, don’t worry about me. I’m a big girl.”
“Don’t come to me, okay? When he breaks your heart again, or even if you break your own heart for your own stupidity, don’t come to me. Maybe then, I wouldn’t have to worry.”
Tiffany shut her eyes. “Stop trying to see me as you, okay? I’m not you, Jessi.”
“You’re right. You’re not me. At least you got the better end, right? At least you’re convinced that you were loved.” Jessica then grunted as she walked away.
***
I’m sorry.
Why are you ignoring my calls?
Jessi.
Don’t do this.
Come on. Answer my calls.
I said some things I shouldn’t have.
Jessi...
Please?
We should talk this out.
The blonde looked at her phone as it vibrated yet again. She then dropped her arms on the bed as she laid there comfortably; her other arm rested on her forehead. Why couldn’t she just talk to Tiffany? What was stopping her? She was trying to think things through again, trying to recall the incident. There was nothing she did wrong, well maybe she overdid some of them, but it was all for Tiffany.
The pain of loving someone who didn’t love them back was something Jessica mastered. If there was a medal for it, Jessica could probably wear the gold. And this pain she felt for loving her best friend, for falling for the right person on the wrong time was something she didn’t want her new friend to feel. She hoped that even if she was in this pit of self-destruction, she would help Tiffany crawl out of it - no matter what it took; even if it meant she would stay in that pit by herself, not letting Tiffany know her pain.
Jessica felt her phone vibrate, it was a text message from Taeyeon.
Where are you? I thought we’ll all have dinner together?
Not feeling all that chatty, the blonde simply turned off her phone and decided to just sleep things off and worry about it the next morning.
***
Boring lectures. Students paid to be torture in school, and Jessica stood firm to this statement. Why would they pay so much money to be in a prison cell? Her chemistry teacher couldn’t be anymore interesting as she talked to the whiteboard, trying to explain the bonds to her class, if any was listening.
Good thing for Jessica, she already read ahead and so she really didn’t have to pay attention. She was just waiting to be dismissed by their professor. Minutes passed and their professor said they were wrapping things up for the day.
There was a two-hour leeway between this class and her next, and she didn’t know if she should call her friends to hangout, or maybe she should still be alone to clear her mind. She was still unsure of what to do with Tiffany after so many text messages from her friend. What she did wasn’t probably what the lifeguard thought when thinking of solving the problem, but Jessica only thought of Tiffany when she did all those. And even after all this, Jessica didn’t feel bad for threatening Taecyeon and his friends. Not one bit did she regret what she did. And maybe Tiffany would stop being her friend after knowing this side of her.
Maybe that was the very reason she was scared to know the truth. What if her new friend didn’t accept this side of her? Weird enough, she used to not care what others think. But Tiffany was special. She liked herself more when she was with the girl. It seemed to her that whenever she was there for her friend, she felt better - that there was still some good in her. And she wanted to maintain that goodness, even if it was just for Tiffany.
Clearly, the other girl didn’t share the same sentiments.
Things were meant to stay the same, and maybe Jessica sticking with being bad, while Tiffany sticking with being good, was for the best. There were reasons to why Yin and Yang were made to be white and black. They were never made to make the color gray. Never. They were made to be as defined as day and night, and maybe they both fell in that category. But a part of Jessica still hoped that things could work out.
~~~~~~~~~~~
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