The first thing I noticed when my consciousness returned was the bone chilling cold that seemed as if it were piercing my skin.

I half opened my eyes and d around for anything that could keep me warm, not fully awake or coherent. Unfortunately for me and my body’s health, I found nothing except the sheet that covered the mattress. I reluctantly sat up and decided to get something to keep me warm from the biting cold.

I fully opened my eyes and almost jumped in the air from shock. This wasn’t my room… Where was I? I darted my head around, inspecting every corner of the room as if it would give me some kind of indication as to why I was sleeping here.

The room looked like it was designed for someone living alone. It definitely didn’t give off a friendly vibe, either. I placed my feet on the floor but immediately retracted them in shock from the freezing wood.

All of a sudden, I felt like crying. I was alone, lost and freezing. Why couldn’t I remember how I got here?

Did I drink last night?

I shook my head, deciding that I would find something warm first and then try to remember what happened. I stalked to the door on my tippy toes, attempting to avoid the cool floor and walked into the room adjacent to the bedroom. The first thing that caught my eye was a painfully unstylish orange rug situated in the middle of the room.

I made a dash for the rug, hoping to get my feet on something remotely warm. I sighed in relief when my feet finally touched the cushiony fabric. It was still cold, but considerably less cold than the wood that lined the floor.

I glanced around the house and noticed that it was pretty much completely unfurnished besides the necessities. The place looked ridiculously well cleaned and reminded me more of a hotel than a home. There was a couch that covered the edge of rug I was standing on, facing a T.V that couldn’t have been any bigger than my computer monitor at home with a dark chocolate coloured coffee table in between.

I frowned wondering just how poor these people really were.

The furniture seemed nice, but the electronics… I couldn’t even see a computer anywhere. Who didn’t have a computer these days? I turned my head to investigate some more and almost choked in shock when I caught sight of the phone that lay on a small black and white table with four chairs to match.

It was a land line. With the curly wire and all! People collected those things as antiques! I scratched the back of my head in confusion, trying to figure out what kind of person or persons lived here. I spotted a small kitchen tucked into a corner that was being half blocked by the wall.

I saw another door that I assumed led to the bathroom and decided to go check it out. Usually I wasn’t really the type of person to just use someone else’s bathroom, but I was desperate to go after god knows how many hours of sleep.  I sighed in resignation, ready for my feet to take the abuse of the floor and made my way over.

And I thought the living room was cold… But at least the facilities were nicely looked after.

I ped the front of my jeans at a lightning speed, wanting to get out of the bathroom as quickly as possible before I froze to death. After I was finished with my business in record time, I turned the hot water tap on and washed my hands in utter bliss. Ah… warmth. How I missed you.

I looked at myself in the mirror, admiring my dishevelled state. I really didn’t look good. I had large bags under my eyes which spoke of sleepless nights and my straight sandy blonde hair was sticking up all over the place. I patted my hair down and flicked it to the side, hoping to at least tame it in the slightest.

When I flicked my hair, I caught the slightest glimpse of black lying on the floor. I turned my head and almost cried in relief when I saw my bag sitting there. To the side of it, I found my white sneakers, socks and all. I quickly grabbed my shoes and bag and ran back to the main room where it was marginally warmer.

I took a seat on the two-seater couch, revelling in the comfort it gave with its fluffy exterior. I shoved my socks on and my shoes, even though I was inside, for more warmth. I apologised to the owners of the house in my head for not being barefoot. I ripped open the zip of my bag and found my mobile phone, IPod, wallet and camera. I immediately flipped my phone open, hoping and praying that it would have credit and battery.

I sighed in relief when the phone and thanked myself for remembering to always charge it.

I opened my contact list, but my stomach flipped when I saw what was there – or more accurately, what wasn’t there. All my contacts had been deleted. I gaped at the phone and tried turning it off and on, pulling the battery out and resetting it, but still, nothing worked. I even tried dialling a few numbers I knew off by heart but all I got was a dial tone. I was beginning to freak out.

My brain started making up all sorts of ridiculous scenarios – was I kidnapped by a fan girl? Was she jealous of the people I had as contacts and so deleted them? Did I delete them after a drunken night? I groaned and dropped my head into my hands.

Nothing was making sense.

I once again tried to recall what happened last night, but all I got were vague memories and passing thoughts. I pulled out my wallet but to my dismay I had no money stashed inside. Great, I was lost, alone and penniless. I sighed to myself but realised that maybe things weren’t so bad after all. I was a celebrity after all, and I could just go outside and hopefully someone would start screaming. I’d ask them to help me back to my home.

In a last ditch effort to figure out what was going on, I pulled out my camera and starting browsing through the photos. I scrolled through the pictures of me and my members, smiling a little at the silly pictures we took. I scrolled to another photo, but this time my heart felt like it stopped.

It was a picture of the funeral. A severe headache came on instantly, and I dropped the camera onto the carpet below. Flashes of memory were running through my mind at break neck speed. I was there… at his grave. I sat down… I talked to him. I remember I could hear his voice, then an overwhelming sense of fatigue…

The headache subsided as quickly as it came, but that was when I officially started to panic.I out in front of a grave and woke up someone completely unfamiliar.

Oh God, what happened to me?

 I decided I wanted out. Fast. I grabbed my bag and ran to the bedroom to make sure I hadn’t left anything behind, then speed-walked out the front door. The door seemed to have an automatic locking system. I sighed in relief, knowing I wouldn’t have to feel guilty for leaving it unlocked.

When I successfully escaped the house, I noticed that this wasn’t a house, but a hotel. Several rooms were lined up next to each other and only increased the sinking feel of anxiety in my stomach. What was I doing in a hotel of all places? I somehow made my way to the elevator but bit my lip before taking it.

Ever since I had gotten stuck in one when I was younger, I could never take an elevator without feeling a gripping sense of panic overwhelm me. I looked around to see if there were any alternate ways to get down and noticed a door that led to a staircase. I almost jumped in joy right there, but restrained myself. I ran down the stairs as quickly as I could without risking tripping and causing myself grievous bodily harm.

The stairs were a long way down… I finally reached the bottom floor and burst the door open, panting. I realised I must’ve looked a sight and quickly straightened up, composing myself. This wasn’t really good for my image. I spotted a woman sitting behind a desk, looking down through her dyed light brown hair. I sighed in relief at the first sight of another person and quickly pulled my hood on to obscure my face and approached her.

“Excuse me, but where is this?” I queried, trying not to make eye contact.

There was a brief silence on her part before she answered, “Human Starville Cheongdam Residence, Sir.”

… Where? I had to go fishing for more information. “Um, that... where is that?” It wasn’t my most eloquent wording, but I was in state of panic and things just weren’t connecting properly in my brain.

She gave me a look that was a mix of exasperation and concern, “We’re in Cheongdam-dong, Apgujeong.”

I felt a powerful sense of relief when I realised I knew where I was. This must’ve been… what, a ten minute bus ride to S.M? I wasn’t sure of my exact location, but I was at least not that far from a familiar place. Just as the relief came, it was shot away in an instant when I remembered that I probably had to pay. The only issue being, I had nothing on me. I hoped and prayed to God that I paid before I used the room.  

“I… Did I pay for my room last night?” I asked timidly, rocking back on my heels to create a bigger distance between us as if it would help ease the awkwardness.

This time, her face was only one of pure concern “Sir, last night you booked a room for six months and paid it all in advance,” She informed me, sounding as astonished as I felt. “Are you alright?”

I nodded weakly and gave her the best smile I could muster given the circumstances, “I’m sure I’ll be fine.” What the hell did I do? “Did I come here… alone?”

“Alone,” She confirmed with a nod.

I bit my lip, well at least I knew that I came here on my accord and wasn’t kidnapped by a crazy fan girl. My hood fell back and I panicked internally. This could spell disaster if someone saw me, and there wasn’t a lack of people passing by or hanging around drinking coffee in the lobby. I kept an eye on the woman and judged her expression, but it didn’t change in the slightest besides a light smattering of pink highlighting her cheeks. I pulled the hoodie back up and covered my face once again.

“Sorry for asking, but how do you get to S.M Entertainment from here?”

She was beginning to look a little flustered. “Take the first road right, then turn left and keep walking until you reach a bus stop.”

I smiled at her and she began to blush like mad and looked down, “Thanks.”

I turned around and began to walk away when I heard her mumble, “So that’s why so handsome.”