"Hell, it's freezing," Himchan complained, hugging himself as he walked. The sky was turning into a shade of orange, indicating the setting sun which meant the temperature was decreasing by the second as well. Winter season was yet to pass and Himchan was only wearing two layers of clothing.

Himchan and Yongguk had just made their way out of the Grand Plaza Auditorium, had just bidded their goodbyes and see you laters to Yongguk's group of friends who preferred to stay behind a little more longer (after Yongguk heavily bragged about his new headphones and added that he'd let them borrow it if they would keep his things for the night with having said that carrying on a date—Himchan merely escaping a sudden choke—was kind of a hassle.)

Now they made way along the pavement side by side, unsure of where to head yet, because Himchan couldn't make up his mind.

"Well, yeah like, you could've worn a thicker jacket, you know." Yongguk shrugged, placing his hands on the pockets of his thick sweater gloatingly.

"Well, yeah like, I was trying to dress for the occasion, you know." Himchan feigned a pout. "Ungrateful piece of ."

Yongguk chuckled. "You really love me. I don't know why but you just do."

Himchan was about to snort in sarcasm but was cut shortly when Yongguk stopped in his tracks and gently tugged on the other's arm. Himchan faced him, perplexed. "What."

"Come here."

Yongguk's warm hands deliberately reached for Himchan's cold fingers. He settled Himchan's hands together into fists before placing it close to his lips. Himchan's eyes widened, startled at the sudden feit and was about to abruptly pull away what the hell is happening but then he felt the tingling of the heat of Yongguk's breath come in contact with his hands as Yongguk blew on them.

Yongguk was trying to warm his freezing fists. And Himchan's heartbeat was loud in his ears. His shoulders shuddered, and he knew it had nothing to do with the weather. The coldness of his fingers began to fade away and the slight trembles started to die down.

An alarm was going off in Himchan's head (Yongguk stop, what are you doing, please stop making me fall for you, stop acting like you feel the same way for me, you don't, please stopstopstopstop.)

But Himchan said nothing.

In reality, he just dumbly stood there, watching his best friend fill his hands with warmth that s through his palms.

Himchan said nothing when Yongguk pressed a kiss on his thumbs. Himchan said nothing when Yongguk looked back up on him with a smile, asking him if he still felt cold. Himchan said nothing as he shyly tried to pull his own hands from Yongguk's. Himchan said nothing when Yongguk insisted on holding his other hand, interlacing his long and delicate fingers with Himchan's stubby ones as they continued to walk down the road.

Himchan had completely lost control over his feelings.

"So where are we heading?" Yongguk asked, grin taking up half of his face as he rocked their hands back and forth.

"There's this restaurant I know," Himchan responded, trying not to stutter. "It's by the side of a hill and it really has a nice overview of the city especially in the evening."

"Great. Then let's go there." Yongguk drew in a lungful of winter air and nodded, amusement apparent in his eyes. "See, Himchan? Maybe you wouldn't make a bad boyfriend after all." He grinned as he brought up their intertwined hands and shook it around for emphasis.

Himchan used them punch Yongguk on the stomach.

By this time, Himchan knew he should be used to this side of Yongguk, doing the usual stuff that would be romantic under different circumstances (circumstances unlike them being both men and best friends;) save for the fact that those were the reasons why Himchan found himself falling for Yongguk and that wasn't supposed to happen because Yongguk was just playing around goddamnit Himchan shouldn't take anything seriously.

But the problem was every time he tried to force these facts in his head he would remember how Yongguk would look at him—eyes a little to intense, gaze lingering a little bit longer, smile a little too wide, laughs a little too bright. (And Himchan wondered, what if I stand a chance, and he wasn't supposed to wonder anything like that but he would.) Himchan didn't have the right amount of courage to confront Yongguk about it, neither did he have the confidence to confess his feelings because things might go wrong and things wouldn't have to go wrong because unless he was hoping that Yongguk might like him back, Himchan really didn't have any logical reason to confess.

(Not that he was hoping that Yongguk might like him back.

Or maybe he was.

But this would just add to his long list of what ifs.)

They arrived at the restaurant after a short taxi ride up the hill and Yongguk looked far happier than Himchan expected him to be when they started to march up the main entrance. They were greeted by a luxurious-looking one-story building filled with yellow lights and plants and pebbles circling around the porch and the pathway. The walls were made of glass so you could see the interior and everything that's going on inside. Trees stretched among either side of the area, down toward the end of the hill.

As Himchan said, the place was overlooking the city, almost the entirety of Seoul spread out before their eyes. And now that the evening has fallen, sky turning purple, urban lights had started to come to life. Yongguk was too delighted in the scenery that he dragged Himchan off to take a table outside the restaurant in the back patio where the view was much closer. They sat beside the fenced barriers, basking in the overview as they waited for the food.

"This is just breathtaking," Yongguk mumbled, eyes twinkling. "Beautiful."

Himchan's gaze however was on the man across the table. "I know."

"How come I never knew this place before?"

Beautiful things just don't come clashing out on one another, Yongguk. Himchan said in his head, but in reality, he just smiled.

It was just one of the simple dinners both of them had shared. Only it was slightly more pleasant than most because it was Yongguk's special late birthday celebration spiced up by the landscape in view.

Himchan and Yongguk talked and talked and talked, almost having no end to their comfortable conversation as Yongguk told him about the new things he learned about rapping, about the new people he met, about the things he wanted to get done for the month, about the internal burst of joy and sense of accomplishment he would experience whenever he would get to perform on stage just like he did a few hours ago.

They haven't legitimately caught up with each other for weeks now and it seemed like Himchan had already missed a whole chapter in Yongguk's life.

It was mostly just Yongguk rambling about his thoughts and latest encounters along with Himchan's remarks of agreement and acknowledgement but he didn't mind. Himchan loved listening to Yongguk, everything he would say would stir up interest—he would make the simplest occurrences sound amazing. Himchan thought he could stay there all night—just listening and staring and laughing and talking and falling.

It was until there was no more food to talk over when Himchan was reminded of something else about the place.

"Come, I'll show you something." He told Yongguk invitingly with an eager smile, emerging from his seat.

Yongguk stood up as well and followed him toward the edge of the porch to a long stoop leading down the hill. "Where are we going?" They ascended downhill and had landed to a pathway heading left.

"Here." Himchan stopped by the end of the pavement—a huge soiled clearing by the fenced edge of the cliff. A huge oak tree loomed by the corner, with two rope tree swings hanging low on one of its thick branches.

Himchan hurried to sit on one of the swings and beckoned for Yongguk to hurry up, pointing at the next swing seat with a grin. "Come on, it's fun!" He chuckled giddily like a toddler as he started to sway back on forth.

Yongguk complied, sitting on other swing steadily, and tried to shove at Himchan. "Hey, don't go too fast or you might throw yourself off the cliff," he yelled through Himchan's hooting. "And as much as that would be a good idea, I don't think I want to be accused of murder on my birthday."

"Wow, shut it, doofus—" Himchan counter attacked, ignoring Yongguk as he continued to whip himself on and across the air, "—it is not your birthday anymore. This is a late birthday celebration."

Yongguk shrugged. "Well I think today's much more special," he muttered under his breath, voice so low it was almost inaudible. But since Himchan had always been sort of attentive in everything Yongguk would do, of course he perked up on that.

Himchan abruptly stopped in surprise, planting his feet on the ground. He turned his head to face Yongguk, mouth opened as he tried to say something, anything, but was rendered speechless.

What do you mean by that, Yongguk.

Yongguk looked away to the overview, exhaled and inserted his hands inside the pockets of his jacket. "It's true."

Himchan took that in, looking down and scaling the soil below his feet with the tip of his shoe. He stayed that way for a little more longer as he gathered his thoughts, phrasing the words he wanted to say next.

"My parents brought me here when I was eleven," Himchan started, and Yongguk looked back at him with a curious expression. "The restaurant was just newly made during those times. But way back before it was built, they told me that this is the exact place where my dad asked mom for marriage." He craned his neck to Yongguk's direction and smiled. "Amazing, isn't it? Romantic even. How he chose such a beautiful place for a proposal. Dad was crazy for mom—still is. He put up these swings then, and when he was finished, I sat here watching how he approached mom and they stood there and smiled at each other—I wanted to ask why, why they're smiling like that for no reason—like they shared a silly secret that only the two of them knew and the rest of world wasn't aware of it. I don't know but I think I understand them now."

A hint of surprise was apparent in Yongguk's eyes and Himchan wanted to read his thoughts—wanted to see the world in Yongguk's point of view—wanted Yongguk to tell him what he was feeling, what he was expecting, what did your actions mean, why are you making it hard for me, Yongguk.

Himchan pressed his lips together as he stood up and headed closer toward the fences by the edge of the cliff. He stuffed his cold hands inside his jean pockets as he allowed the scenery to take his breath away for another time. He could feel Yongguk's lingering stare on his back, he could hear his breathing—deep, inconsistent. (It was better that way, that none of them could see each other's expressions, that Himchan could just jump off the edge if anything would have to go haywire.)

He braced himself for the worst.

"My dad told me that if I'm feeling something special for someone—something different and unexplainable, something that makes my heart jump in my chest, something that makes me smile out of nowhere—he told me that I should tell that person, because that person deserves to know that they're special to someone else." Himchan paused, blinking at the horizon, thoughts racing, heart thumping. "My dad told me to bring that person here."

Himchan felt like everything he said had drained the energy and confidence he had left for the night, like he suddenly wanted to tuck himself in bed or run into a lamp post because regret was surging through his veins. What was he doing.

Himchan listened to Yongguk's footsteps when he heard him stand up from the tree swing, each step getting louder, getting closer. And Himchan mustered all the guts in his system and turned around to face the other. Yongguk stopped when he did, about a meter away, the glow of the moon bouncing off his face.

This is it, Himchan thought. Yongguk's going to tell me how disgusting I am, or maybe try to be nice about it and apologize because he doesn't feel the same and he's going to avoid me for the rest of my life and I'm going to be ing depressed about it because my life and I had to fall in love with my best friend out of all the attractive girls I see every day.

It's over.

Yongguk chuckled.

He ing chuckled.

"That is the dumbest thing you have ever said, Kim Himchan." He said, shifting from foot to foot.

Himchan looked down on his feet and frowned at the unpleasant churn in his stomach. "Yeah."

"Which is saying a lot," Yongguk continued. "I mean everything that comes out of your mouth is just plain stupid and this is just—"

", I know that, okay?" Himchan interrupted, giving Yongguk a look that conveyed how agitated he was. "Liking you is on every level of stupidity, I've been aware of that for a while now, you don't have to say it that just made me feel a whole lot better, geez, thanks."

Yongguk lower lip jutted out (and Himchan took a moment to realize that he was pouting what the hell.) "Well I think liking you is stupid too," He reiterated. "I've been stupid since the day I met you."

Himchan blinked (and at that point, that's really all he could do.) "What?"

"I like you, too, dummy."

Himchan's eyebrows knit together. "Don't with me. I'm serious right now, Yongguk."

"I am too." Yongguk protested. "You never noticed?"

And that's the exact moment when Himchan found himself wanting to punch Yongguk square in the face because suddenly everything made perfect sense and suddenly, Himchan felt like the most ridiculous person in the world for being so scared and confused with his feelings all that time when the answer was staring him right in the ing nose and yeah, he's a little giddy and dizzy and happy as well but still conflicted—it's the sort of mixed emotions that made him want to punch himself in the face too.

"You're a with arms and legs." Himchan said.

"I was waiting for the right time to tell you but things happened like you becoming busy and never having the time to hang out with me and I feel kind of deprived because you're mine and I want you next to me all the time."

Himchan's cheeks were burning and the feeling was creeping up to his ears and down to his neck because he couldn't keep up with the funny feeling in his chest anymore that he so much wanted to claw his heart and bury it underground. "That's pretty stupid."

"I know," Yongguk agreed. "And you make me smile out of nowhere and make my heart jump too. So we're pretty much even on the stupid scale."

Himchan couldn't resist the smile that was forming on his own lips then. "Go out with me, Yongguk."

Yongguk smiled back—genuine and thoughtful and beautiful and full of gums. "Wow, and I've always pictured that I'd be the one saying that." He held Himchan's gaze deviously. "Geez, I really don't know." He answered and started sauntering toward Himchan. "I mean you could've had possibly brought up like forty people in here and I'm just one of the ones—not really someone particularly special and stuff—I mean, I like special and stuff."

"Let me think," Himchan said as Yongguk approached to a halt right in front of him, "Nah, I haven't been here since I was eleven—"

Yongguk pulled him closer.

Yongguk started to kiss him.

Yongguk continued to kiss him.

Yongguk’s kiss was sweet, was slow, was romantic. He held Himchan’s face in his hands as if holding a fragile flower. And as Himchan listened to the rhythm of his heart match the pace of the kiss, he realized he didn’t expect Yongguk to be so gentle, to kiss as if Himchan was something precious.

Himchan had fallen deep and hard and someone had been there to catch him.

Yongguk had been there to catch him.

(And Himchan thought that this was far more perfect than any lame cheesy scenario he had in his head.)

Yongguk pulled away, palms still on Himchan’s cheeks as they both took time to catch their breaths, feeling like they could stand there and smile at each other forever. Yongguk pressed his forehead against Himchan, noses touching. "Maybe I will go out with you."

Himchan tried to puff his cheeks against Yongguk’s hands. “Maybe?”

“Terms and conditions apply.”

“Yongguk.”

“Just one thing.” Yongguk grinned, almost sadistically as he nuzzled his nose on Himchan's. "You will be the girlfriend," he said and leaned in for another toe-curling kiss before Himchan could start with his protests.