Eleventh Part

A smile played over his lips as he felt Soo Yeon’s finger tracing over his definite features. He let her enjoy herself a few moments, making sure that she was really there by his side and that she wasn’t just a mere illusion. Then, he slowly tightened his embrace around her waist, bringing her closer as he exhaled her sweet vanilla scent. Opening his eyes, he found himself directly looking into her curious eyes, which never failed to make him fall even deeper in love with her –if that was possible-.  God, how can she looks so adorable even if it was still early in the morning? He wished they could stay like this forever.
 

“Morning beautiful”

With that, he was rewarded with her beautiful smile as she snuggled even more in his chest. Truthfully, both of them had missed mornings like that: being the last person they see as they go to sleep and the first in the morning. At that moment, they shared a certain intimacy while being in each other’s embrace and no words were needed to describe how happy and complete they were. Of course, both of them knew that sooner or later, they had to talk about what happened in these last months… but not now.

Soo Yeon began to play with his finger but as he took her wrist in his hand, she looked up and gasped at how close their faces were. It wasn’t uncomfortable, but it still did surprise her a bit. Her eyes softened, thinking of how innocent he looked. She found him absolutely handsome whenever, but sleepy Chen is still her favorite. As le leaned down to claim her lips, she frowned and pushed his forehead away with her index finger and giggled as she saw his lips forming into the adorable pout of his.

“Why?” he whined childishly making her giggle even more
“You stink, no offence” she teased
“Well… guess who ran out in the middle of the night until the sunrise to look in every corner of Seoul for the love of his life whom had escaped from her mother? ”

She softened again, seeing how much he cared for her even though she walked out of his life… well okay, he was the one who pushed her away but hey; in the end she did walk away by herself. Suddenly, she leaned downward and pecked his forehead, his nose and then his lips quickly. Chen grinned, despite the fact that he was paralyzed by the surprise, seeing her beet red because of embarrassment.

“Oh so… do I still stink now?” he teased back
“Oh shut up!” she groaned before she sank into his chest, hiding her red face
“Don’t hide, you’re beautiful” he murmured sweetly into her ears, making her blush even more.
“I hate you” she pouted
“Oh really princess?” he grinned mischievously

Sooyeon frowned upon seeing his devilish grin and got ready to race out of bed as she got an idea of what he was ready to do but before she even get the chance to move, Chen hovered on top of her, making sure that he wasn’t crushing her under his weight. Then he placed his hands over her hips, still grinning as he felt her trying to escape under him, without success.

“YAH Y- AHHH-HAHAHAHA” she laughed heartily as he tickled her side.
“What did you say ?” he asked and laughed along, still torturing her with his tickling
“St-stop ! Oppa!”
“Hm ? Deng ! Wrong answer!”
“Okay okay ! I love you cheater”
“Hm… because I love you more, I’ll forget THE last word and let it slide. Only because you’re you!”
“Oh! How nice of you gentleman!” she smiled as he gently kissed her forehead

The lovers lay there, stealing a kiss from time to time without ever breaking eye contact. No words were needed to describe how perfect that moment was. Both of them wished secretly that the time could stop at that exact moment.

“But you know, we still need to talk about…” he cut her with a kiss
“I know… just 10 more minutes, please.” he sighed, nuzzling into the crook of her neck again
“You’ve been telling me the same thing since last night” she rolled her eyes playfully

She heard him sigh for the umpteenth time when she felt herself being pushed down. Her hair spread on his legs as her head rested comfortably on his laps, their hands intertwined. It may sound quite cheesy, but after all that time that they spent apart, they didn’t want to let go of each other anymore. Ever.

“Soo Yeon… ” he began to say hesitantly.  As she hummed in response, he began to play with her hair. “Do you trust me?”  She frowned and then knocked his forehead lightly making him wince slightly.  Can’t believe I’m in love with that stupid guy.  All she did was to blink at him and he understood immediately. No words were needed.

« Tell me. Tell me what happened at that time. »
She waited for him to speak, but nothing came out of him. She sat up and was surprised to see him deep in thoughts. In fact, he was battling with himself in his mind. Should I tell her? Should I not? He knew that his girl was a smart one and that she has always been a righteous person but he also knew that she loved her mom unconditionally. Even though he hated the woman, he would never do something as cruel as breaking their mom and daughter relationship. His own mother has failed to keep her promise to stay forever by their side, but where is she now? He knew how it feels to be deceived by his own blood. He couldn’t let her get hurt because of his own selfishness.  

“Listen. I don’t think it’s a good idea to-”
“I need it.” She interrupted. “I need to hear the truth. From you.”

So she really knows it all. And indeed, she did. But what she wanted to hear was his version of the whole dramatic situation. She needed to be reassured, she needed to know what he felt too.

“It all started about two years ago. I’ve always felt that everything in my family was perfect. I had an adorable little sister –as you already know- and two amazing parents. You know, while watching them interacts, I’ve often tried to portray the two of us, acting the same even though twenty years has passed after our weddings.  Everything seemed perfect in their couple but then, my dad started to change.” His face darkened suddenly. “He always came back home late. Actually, there was some times when he didn’t even bother to come back home even though his working hours at the company were long finished. Mom would always wait for him until late at night so she can eat and spend some quality time with him but… he didn’t even have any interest to do that. In a span of a few months, I felt like my parents grew considerably farther and farther.” He paused as he felt her grip tighten on his hand, encouraging him to continue.

“I couldn’t understand at first. Until that day –a year ago- when we had our weekly visit at the hospital. I needed to use the toilet so I went out of the children’s room and as I made my way back, a nurse called me as she recognized me as your mother’s future son-in-law.” He laughed at the last part despite the situation. “She gave me flowers, saying that it was the daily delivery for your mom and that it would be great if I could hand these to her since the nurse was busy. I didn’t question it until I saw the card which came along the flowers.” he scoffed, covering his eyes with his arm.   Sooyeon frowned as she took his hand in her once again.

“What was on it?” she muttered even though she had a slight idea
“He told her that he still waited for your mom and that he isn’t going to give up until the day when she would accept his confession. Under that overly cheesy sentence… he signed with his name. Later, I discovered that he visited your mom at the hospital almost everyday, even waiting for her until late at night and some times the whole night when she had night shifts. Thus explain the reason why he always got home late.  I was angry, so angry that I did even that it out on you.” He said with a tingle of guilt and regret.

“I remember. You came back with such a bad mood that you even managed to bring that poor little boy to tears.” she chucked lightly, easing the atmosphere which surrounded them.   He brought her by her waist, so she was able to sit on his laps and kissed her cheek once more.

“I was confused; I didn’t know what to do. Whether to tell it to mom or not. What I didn’t know is that she already knew about that, weeks before I did. She blamed herself for not being good enough to keep her husband faithful.  Can you believe it? She begged, she tried her best to become the best wife ever but nothing seemed to be fixed. As for me, I tried my best to act normal around you but I guess something in me snapped when my parents announced their divorce a few months after.  I went mad. Especially after mom left us without a word after the divorce. I was mad at everyone. Mad at dad for being a bastard, mad at mom for abandoning her children in those difficult moments, mad at your mom for being the reason of their separation. I was even so mad at you while you were nothing but a sweetheart to me when I didn’t feel well and was a jerk because of this.  I’m sorry for being such a coward and such a selfish person. ” at this point, he didn’t care about his pride anymore. He just let his tears flows freely as he snuggled into Soo Yeon’s neck.

Seeing him like this, she cuddled him while whispering some reassuring words in his ears. “Hush hush… it’s okay, everything’s okay. You don’t need to continue, I understand.”        But surprisingly, he just shook his head and continued.

“Like this, I saw my family crumble. With my mom gone, a dad who had lost my trust and a little sister who has to get hospitalized for health issues… I was lost and felt so much hatred that I needed to vent it on someone. I knew so damn well that it wasn’t your mom’s fault. She rejected him every time and he was the one who persisted. But still, I felt the need to hurt her, to crush her like how my mom has been crushed. I knew I couldn’t do anything until I remembered her most treasured jewel: you. You had nothing to do with all of this but I thought that if got to you, then I could hurt her. I… I overlooked our love and hurt you just for some stupid revenge. I didn’t know what got into me as I hurt you in every way possible. Breaking up with you, talking to you in a rude way, bullying with Joo Ae… I thought that I would feel some sort of relief but there was nothing like that. Instead, I was killing both of us a little more each day. I regret it so much. I could beg you and ask for your forgiveness infinitely… but it will never be enough.”

Now, tears were flowing out of both of them.  Chen slowly loosened his grip around her waist and his face drained when he felt her leave his laps. Of course, she would leave you after what you’ve done. But he didn’t want to. He didn’t want her to leave. Neither his house, nor him and his life. It was all too painful. But he would let her do it if it was what she wanted. After all, he would’ve done the same thing if he was her.

“You’re right. You’re a jerk, a coward and a selfish person. Fits perfectly.”
“I understand. I don’t deserve you.  I just want you to know that I love you. Always have and always will. And I’m sorry.” He put his face in his hands, crying silently as he waited for the sound of the door, signaling that she was gone from his life. Forever.