This evening, we got to attend as a guest star in Radio station. Siwon hyung came with us too, and he just completely ignored me.

I sighed, trying to inhale deeply to swallow my tears.

Tears wouldn’t be able to melt his stone heart, and I am Cho Kyuhun had enough of crying for him.

He just kept bothering Eunhyuk hyung and Donghae hyung, he talked to anyone, to any members, but me.

‘What did I do wrong that made me deserve this hyung?’

It was supposed to be me who got angry with you, it was supposed to be me who ignored you, who acted like I didn’t care of you.

‘Have I fallen in love with the wrong person? Have I gotten wrong to fall to you, hyung? you just leave me hanging, you don’t talk to me, you don’t look at me.’

You know hyung? The opposite of love is not hatred, because when we hate someone we still care of them, we still think of them. The opposite of love is indiference, and now you are just ignoring me.

Why don’t you just tell me that you don’t love me anymore? it will be better than you just keep hurting me by saying that I mean nothing to you in the live interview, showing all affection to the women you just met. It hurts me hyung.

You were my everything, hyung, since I’ve known what love is. I always thought that we were meant to be together, like forever. But maybe it was just my selfishness,

You don’t say that you want to leave me, yet,

But, you and I are going nowhere.

This love, my love is going nowhere.

I can’t see your heart to me now…

They asked me to sing lively. And this is my chance for me to tell you.

I’m tired hyung, I’m really tired.

I looked at him intently, before started singing, hoping that he would get the message.

‘Even if it hurts, pretending that it’s nothing

 Even if tears fall, knowing how to hide them

 Placing it in one side of the heart

 And knowing how to smile as if nothing’s wrong

 The way to break up

My heart is growing dim again

 The many lingering attachments are pulling down

 It will probably be erased, it will probably become faint

 We will probably forget each other

My meaningless day will probably pass by

 Our one of a kind love is like it never happened

 Even if I say I miss you, I can’t ever see you

 Even if it hurts, I need to withstand it

 This is the way to break up

I’m used to days without you now

 Tomorrow will be a little more comfortable

 I will forget you little by little

Sometimes, I will think of you

 Only good memories will remain

* My meaningless day will probably pass by

 Our one of a kind love is like it never happened

 Even if I say I miss you, I can’t ever see you

 Even if it hurts, I need to withstand it

Even if it hurts, pretending that it’s nothing

 Even if tears fall, knowing how to hide them

 Placing it in one side of the heart

 And knowing how to smile as if nothing’s wrong

 This is the way to break up

** Only my welled up tears remember you

 And there are so many traces of happiness

 To me, love is such a painful thing

 Even if it hurts, I need to withstand it

 I will probably forget like this

Sometimes, I will think of you

 Only good memories will remain

* repeat

Even if it hurts, pretending that it’s nothing

 Even if tears fall, knowing how to hide them

 Placing it in one side of the heart

 And knowing how to smile as if nothing’s wrong

 I need to forget you

** repeat’

A single drop of tear was streaming down my face. All the memories came up just to fade away.

All members clapped and gave me standing ovation, but you. that was the first time for these couple of weeks you noticed my presence.

That was the first time you saw me straightly in the eyes.

I was about to get out from the van, when you pulled me roughly, forced me back to my seat while the others were already outside.

“what do you want to say to me,  magnae?” your voice, how I missed to hear your husky yet manly voice, hyung. but one thing I recognized, you didn’t call me, you no longer called me baby Kyu, or Kyunnie, or Kyuhyunna, you called me magnae.

I am just the magnae for you now.

“let’s break up, Siwon hyung.”  Once I said those words, I could feel my heart was torn into pieces. I could feel nothing. That was it.