That afternoon I found myself sitting across Junho at that same shop we were in just a few days ago. We were here for a meeting to decide what song we were going to sing for the Music test. Why here? I had no idea. I suggested the place without really thinking. A smarter option would have been at my house so we had the proper equipment to work with should we decide to practice.

This was serious business. We couldn’t just sing. We had to rearrange the song differently too, it wasn’t a music class for nothing.

It was times like these that I wished I had Taec as a partner. Even Minji or Junsu. Those three would have it easiest. I didn’t even want to know how Minji and Junsu’s song would come out, they were grouped together, and our chances of looking like we even knew what we were doing were slim. With both Minji and Junsu together, no one else in our class stood a chance.

Junho was looking through my music player, brows knitted together in the middle of his forehead. “Interesting playlist.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I just thought you’d have more ballads. I didn’t expect to see hip-hop, rock, and indie.”

“Is that a bad thing?”

The question came out before I could even think about it, and Junho just smiled but it didn’t reach his eyes. “I haven’t even heard you sing. I can’t really think of a song without knowing your key and range.”

Perhaps what I hated the most was the very valid argument he made. I did not make a habit of singing in class as Junsu and Taecyeon did all the time. Even Sunye and Suzy take on each other every once in a while. Me? No. I think I prefer blending in the background, thank you. Unfortunately, this time I had no choice. The same could be said about the dance test, but Jay can be worried about at another time.

I think.

“Let’s go to your house. We don’t really have a lot of time to prepare.”

I’m sorry. What did Junho just say?! He looked at me funny. He was already ready to leave, but I wasn’t. Not one bit. Going back to my house was a bad idea. Ian would be home. That was not ideal at all.

“Uh, do we have to? Can’t we just stay here?” Sure, the juice shop was not exactly the most conducive place to study a song, but that wasn’t really the issue at the moment.

“What? I’m sure you have a piano, we’ll accomplish more that way.”

“I-” What exactly was I going to say? “I don’t really want to go home yet. Can’t we just go to your house instead?”

Junho appeared to consider the option, but it wasn’t a long thought process. “I think it would be more convenient for you if we just go to your house. That way, you don’t have to worry about staying out too late.”

Why was he so persistent?

“Junho, I really don’t want to go home yet.” I repeated.

He sighed in defeat. Honestly, I wasn’t expecting him to give in this easily. “Fine. It’s a little out of the way. Is your driver around?”

Somehow I felt really embarrassed by that. “No, but we can just go...the...normal way.”

A soft chuckle escaped his lips. “Are you sure?”

I nodded.

…

Junho’s house was everything I imagined it to be, except maybe I didn’t think it would be an apartment at this big complex. It was simple, a word that was probably an overstatement in comparison to everyone else’s lavish mansions. In a way, maybe living like this wasn’t so bad.

We walked down the corridor towards their door, and who else do I see but Kim Hyoyeon walking towards us. Because I really didn’t know what to do considering my interaction with As were minimal, I drop my gaze immediately.

Her conversation with Junho was interesting though.

“Hey Junho, you’re early today.”

“Yeah, I have to work on a music test. You’re off to the studio?”

“Mhm. Dance practice. You should join us some time. Bring Wooyoung with you, he has a bit of a reputation there. People actually want to meet him.”

“I’ll see what I can do. Take care, okay?”

What was I supposed to feel? Awkward? Yes. There was something else, but the glaring fact that these two knew each other outside school somehow bothered me. I had thought the first time they interacted was back during the Mountain Lodge trip. I was wrong, and I hated being wrong.

“Are you ready for the dance test?”

“I thought we were preparing for the music test?” If it came out panicked, it was probably because I was. Jay was my dance partner, but his absences wasn’t very ideal for...many reasons. I kept my eyes away from Junho and on whatever else there was inside the apartment. It was typical as typical would go, simple furniture lined the walls and the middle space was generally kept empty. The only other set inside was the dining table next to the stove and sink, and a little to the side was a modest television.

Junho shrugged, “I just remembered I guess. Are you ready?”

“I’m never ready for anything.” I admitted, looking away from his attempt to look into my eyes. Dance was not something I wanted to talk about at that moment. Dance meant having to talk about Jay, and Jay was just another unknown in my life.

“Practice?”

“That’s what we’re doing, right?”

“No, I mean, do you need help for the dance test?”

I felt a rush of blood rise to my cheeks, “No,” I shook my head, “I can handle it.”

He laughed, “Anyway, I think I have a song that we can work on. I hope you like Panic.”

Yes, yes in fact I did, and Waiting was one of those songs that needed to be remade. I had to admit, I was thinking of a song somewhere more along the lines of Vanilla Love, or some other cheesy fluffy song, but this wasn’t such a bad choice.

Or at least that’s what I told myself. Somehow, there was this nagging part of me that had the gall to feel disappointed about it.

Junho pulled out the track and played it, but my head wasn’t in it completely. It was such a sad song, did I really want to perform this? “Do you want to do something a bit more...happy?”

He looked up at me, evidently surprised. “What do you have in mind?”

I shrugged, “I don’t know, something...not so depressing. I know Wooyoung and Suzy are doing some intense harmonizing, and Minji and Junsu are actually performing an original, maybe we can do something...fun instead?”

I should have known better than to trust that look on his face.

...

Needless to say, the Sports Meet results came out as everyone expected. Although observation told me that this summer was going to be interesting if the way people from different schools hung around with each other after the day was over. Interesting might even be an understatement.

The same could be said for the atmosphere inside the classroom. Today was our last official day of stuff to do, and the finisher was Ian’s duet exam. How did the dance test go? Let’s not go into details. Just know that Jay showed up, and I didn’t embarrass myself that much.

First up on the platform was Taecyeon and Jia in a surprising reversion of roles. Surprising, and also very shocking. Taecyeon was singing, and Jia was rapping. We all knew both of them rapped, but Jia always sang before she rapped, and Taecyeon had just always insisted on singing instead even though he was much better at rapping.

Chansung and Sohee’s duet was painful to listen to. Not because Sohee couldn’t sing, neither Chansung, but it was more because of the ooshy lovey-dovey song Sohee so obviously chose. We could feel Chansung’s pain- we were in physical pain as Sohee made eyes at him as they sang. Overall, Chansung needed medication afterwards.

The pairs dwindled down, until it was finally the pair the whole class was waiting for. Junsu and Minji. One, Junsu’s singing was divine, two, no one’s heard Minji sing before, three Junsu was magic when it came to composing, and four, Minji had just as much magic as Junsu when it came to lyrics.

Nervous was the least that they looked like as they took the platform. Minji had her head down as she usually did, but a little chiding from Junsu and he, miraculously, looked up and actually faced the class. My eyes zoomed in on Fei, and from my periphery, I could see Seulong doing the same. He turned to me and raised a brow imitating how Fei looked.

This was not going to be pretty.

Junsu cleared his throat, and the whole class waited in anticipation. “So, Minji and I wrote this song, and I hope you all love it.”

A smooth synthesizer intro started the song, and Junsu’s even smoother vocals came in shortly.

Don’t leave, don’t go

Don’t lie about forgetting me

Don’t say those words to me

It didn’t matter that we knew Junsu’s voice was as close to heaven as one could get, he always surprised us every time he sang. This time was no different as he came out with a desperation we never knew he possessed. Him singing those three lines were enough to pull different heartstrings, and I couldn’t help but think if this had anything to do with Fei.

Lies, all of it are lies

Don’t try to tie me down with empty words

You’re already too late.

More than Junsu, it was Minji who surprised us all the most. Her voice was deep and rich, something one would never expect with the way she would speak and most of all the words she spoke. The song was designed that each one of them was answering to each other as if they were speaking in song. We reached the chorus, and my hair stood on end.

It wasn’t the highlight of the song, because as soon as the second chorus came in, and the song transposed to a higher key, our minds were all blown away. Junsu and his high notes were always amazing, but when Minji hit the high note, we were all rendered speechless.

The two of them ended their song, both tired from the feat. They didn’t just sing- Junsu never just sang, he put his whole being into it, and Minji? This was the first time we ever saw her not look like she wanted to kill somebody.

It was not an easy act to follow, but Jay and Min and their version of Heart Damage was just as intense, especially with Jay’s rapping charisma. I was surprised they didn’t do a song and dance number like we expected from these two dancing machines.

When our turn finally rolled around, I was feeling the anxiety even harder than before. Waiting was torture, but walking towards the front was even more angonizing. Junho appeared calm- and it wasn’t just for show as his calm energy radiated towards me. He sent me a reassuring smile, and it was as if the anxiety just lifted away.

I met his eyes, and his words to me before class repeated themselves in my head. If you’re nervous, just look at me. There’s no class, just you and me. Just sing, don’t worry, I have your back.

Junho smiled, and I felt my lips tug into one of its own. It was a fluffy song, after all. Might as well look the part.

If I had a boyfriend, there would be so many things I dreamed of doing

First, is kissing on the street, second, is taking the train at dawn

Third, going on a picnic, fourth, getting a piggyback ride

fifth, getting couple rings is standard

It would be really sweet.

Something was different about performing the song than just practicing it. I blamed it on the adrenaline rush, and the anxiety, and the way Junho’s eyes were gone from smiling too much.

Why does my heart beat thump thump simply at the thought

of to doing each of things daily with you

My day is enjoyable because I have you, now that the two of us are together

My precious you, baby baby baby baby boo~

You know that thing when suddenly what you’re singing about reflects your current state? I could hear my heart beating in my ears, and I balled my hands tighter to my side. Which might have sent Junho the wrong message because what he thought was nervousness about performing, he tried to alleviate by actually taking my hand in his.

I hoped to all omnipotent beings out there that my face wasn’t showing just how I felt. The world seemed to disappear and a bubble encased the two of us- I didn’t know which was worse, this or knowing that the entire class and Ian could see the whole thing transpire.

There are so many things I’ve also wanted to do once I had a girlfriend,

I’ve always been envious

Sixth, late night movie, seventh, amusement park too, eighth, surprise event too

I would be really happy

If Junsu’s voice was the closest thing to heaven as one could get, then I wasn’t sure how to describe Junho’s voice. I had nothing more to say about it, not with the way my hands were trembling and embarrassingly sweaty, not with the way my lungs collapsed, and most definitely not with the way I felt myself smiling like an idiot.

“I love you,” saying those words those words those words just once

“I love you,” hearing those words those words those words just once

Thank you so much for coming to me, you being by my side

My love, baby baby baby baby boo~

baby baby baby baby boo~

I stumbled on my lyrics, but Junho caught my falls as he said he would. I didn’t remember what happened after the song was over, just that he never let my hand go until I was safely back in my seat.

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yeah. you get my drift <3

Songs: Don't Go by Junsu (2PM) and J.Lim from the Dream High OST 

When I Get a Lover by G.Na and Rain