It was nothing as she expected it to be, and now the guilt and the deep regrets were eating her alive.

She thought that she was protecting him and...But, now, she understands that her good intentions were  nothing but poison for his life! 

She felt like a torturer watching her victim, each time she was finding her neighbor silently weeping crumpled on the couch, or sometimes wobbling and whaling like in a deep pain, crouched on the bathroom floor.

 

 

 

Yes, she thought that she was protecting him, but she did it because she was scared to lose A-Yuan and Bo Ge, too! 
Her biological parents didn't want her, her schoolmates always bullied her for being an abandoned child, the only friends she thought she had, have betrayed her, and  her crush laughed at her when she confessed... 
Wang Yibo, this warm and good man, never disrespected or hurt her, he saw in her a valuable soul, trustworthy enough to let his precious son in her care. 
A-Yuan, this sweet child loves her dearly and Wang Yibo was always her honest friend who genuinely loved her and never disrespected her, on the contrary.
And how did Guan XiaoTong repay all the love and respect she got from these wonderful human beings?
She hurt them deeply and took their happiness away!
Wang Yibo never smiled again since that day, nor A-Yuan who was often crying in his nanny's arms, distressed at his Bàba's sadness.

She tried to fix somehow all the harm she did, but sadly she couldn't.
Doctor Xiao Zhan's wife told her that he left the country and he will return only at the time the child will be born. 
An American businessman who invested in their Company, and learned that the talented doctor and skillful businessman Xiao Zhan lost his shares, proposed to him to become his associate and help him to start a similar business in the US. So, Xiao Zhan instantly accepted the offer, as he had nothing more to hold him in China.
He will live in New York, at least for the time Lin ZhiXiao will carry the pregnancy, and he will be back only around the date "his child" will be delivered.
Guan XiaoTong had no idea if Wang Yibo knew that Xiao Zhan was living in New York, but she didn't want to ask him or tell him about it.

 

   

                                                                                                                        

 

It was Christmas Eve!
A month since the doctors gave Wang Yibo the horrible news about his son's health status, also a month since he'd seen ZhanZhan for the last time.

He tried everything in his power, he convinced all of his friends to get tested for liver compatibility, he even accepted to meet a person found on some dubious site, who promised to find a matching person for a sum of money and if Wang Yibo would donate his kidney for another client of his.
Luckily he told Guan XiaoTong by mistake what he was intending to do, and the scammer was arrested, as TongTong called the police.
At first he got mad at the nanny, but when he learned that the person was nothing but a scammer with a rich criminal record, who would get his kidney and then disappear, he thanked her. 

 

 

"Bàba, TonTong said to come inside, or else you will catch a cold!", the little boy shouted from the living room, to his father, who was still on the balcony, watching the snow falling.

 

  

 

Yibo lifted up A-Yuan to help him stick the shining angel on top of the Christmas tree.

"Bàba, it's a beautiful and good smelling Christmas tree!", the pail child  clapped weakly with his tiny hands.
He was much thinner  than a month ago.

 

As for the love of his life, he'd rejected all of ZhanZhan's attempts to meet him, because he knew that it would have been hard to let him go after  facing him, so he agreed to talk to him a few times only through e-mails or by texting.
He didn't want to hear his voice while talking on the phone, either.

That way he found out that Xiao Zhan ceded his Company shares to his associate, but without divorcing.
The Company was saved with Nirosawa's money and the Xiao couple was successfully acting for the eyes of the society as a happy family expecting a baby.

Each phone message or e-mail ended in  'I miss you so much! I'll love you forever!'.

Those words were ripping Yibo's heart everyday, but at the same time it was the daily fuel needed to function as normally as he could as a living human being.

Wang Yibo  picked a habit to sleep dressed in Zhan's pajamas, hugging the pillow which seemed to him to keep smelling like Zhan Ge's musk, sweet scent.

 

Next to the Christmas tree was sitting the huge red bunny that was hugging his white little bunny son.

A-Yuan  hung a red sock in the bunny's arms for Santa to put the gifts.
"Poor Red Bunny, you are so sad, you lost your old friend.
Maybe Santa will bring  you something to cheer up  your mood.
My poor Red Bunny, Mister Friend forgot about you, he forgot about me and forgot about my Bàba, too!", A-Yuan sighed  and  hugged the red plushy.

"No, baby, he didn't forget about us, but I told you that he needs to take care  of another child, smaller than you, who needs a father.
You already have me, but that child has no one else than Zhan Ge to be his father.
But that doesn't mean that he doesn't love us anymore."

"Then why does he never visit us if he loves us?"

"He is very busy. And he wanted to come see us, but it was me who asked  him to not come.
After more time I'll allow him to visit us.
Just not now, not yet!"

 

The doorbell rang and Yibo opened the door to his loud and cheerful friends: Lan Zhan and his cheerful boyfriend Wei Ying.
They had formed a couple from the first day they met at that trainees' debuting show.

They shook their clothes from snow on the hallway, then jumped on A-Yuan, kissing the poor boy's soul out.
The three of them got busy with checking out all the colored boxes brought by the loud couple.

"Who will be our company for your Christmas dinner, Jiàoliàn?", Lan Zhan asked between hiccups of laughter, as  Wei Ying was tickling his sole.

"Only my friend Zhou YiXuan with his wife, also Guan XiaoTong, A-Yuan's nanny."

"That XiaoTong is not your girlfriend, yet?
She really cares about you and this little bunny.", smiled the blonde young man , pinching A-Yuan's cheeks .

"TongTong is and was always a very dear friend to me and a good supporting helping friend. But if in case she had some questions, I don't say that she had, but just in case it was like that, she understood for sure, in time, that my heart is already given to somebody else.", Yibo replied in a broken voice, walking to open the door for the Zhou couple who were loaded with dozen of packs of food and toys.

The evening was pleasantly spent by all Yibo's guests and by now all of them were gone to their homes, except Guan XiaoTong who was helping Yibo with his son's bathe and the house's cleaning.

 

Suddenly the doorbell rang again.

"Who can it be?
Did somebody forget something before going?", TongTong wondered while  unlocking the front door, Yibo being busy with the reading of the good night story for A-Yuan.

"Who are you?", the woman asked, confused at the sight of the two weird characters standing in front of  the door: a handsome Santa and a familiar unicorn.

The  unicorn spoke:
"I'm Xiao Zhan, don't you recognize me?
Allow me to introduce you to each other. This is my friend Lu Han, and she is Miss Guan XiaoTong, A-Yuan's nanny and his father's good friend."

"Oh, my god, hello Mister Xiao Zhan, I'm so glad to see you, A-Yuan will be very happy...Bo Ge will be happy, too, I guess.
Does your friend know A-Yuan?", the woman asked while checking out Santa whose facial expression was like struck by a Cupid lightning.

"Yes, he is a doctor and knows everything about A-Yuan's situation."

"Oh, where are  my manners, please come in!
Yibo Ge!
You have visitors!"

Wang Yibo came out from A-Yuan's bedroom, followed closely by the curious kid.
The little boy's eyes and mouth turned into three perfect "o", amazed at the identity of the late evening visitors.

"Wow, Santa! You really did come to comfort my sad Red Bunny!",  the kid shouted, climbing excitedly in Lu Han's lap, but suddenly stopping in his track to look better at the teary unicorn:
"Mister Friend?!"

"Yes, I am!
Come and give me a big hug, I've missed you so much!", Xiao Zhan managed to speak in a strangled voice and pulled into his arms the tiny little form, planting numerous kisses onto the kid's bony cheeks.
You got taller and manlier since I saw you last time.", he said, noticing bitterly  that A-Yuan looked so much worse than a month ago.

"But why are you an unicorn?
In the story Bàba read to me, Santa was helped by reindeers, not unicorns, ha ha ha.", the child laughed like he hadn't laughed in a long time ago.

"Oh, because in the story I read, the little white bunny was best friends with a unicorn.
Look here, I brought this white bunny cap for you and you can be the unicorn's best friend if you want.", Xiao Zhan unpacked hastily the said cap and placed it on his head to show A-Yuan how to use it.

 

   

 

"Lao Xiao Zhan, why did you come here?", an emotional, broken voice slipped between the kid's laughter.

"Ermm, I'm sorry for breaking the rules...I was needed urgently at home for signing some documents. And my friend Lu Han asked me to go with him to his church to give Christmas presents to the children from  poor families...And I simply couldn't resist anymore! I couldn't resist not seeing you and A-Yuan in this special, holy evening.
Please, forgive me for breaking the rules, but please BoBo, please allow an exception, just for this evening!"

Lu Han asked A-Yuan to help him in emptying Santa's big sack under the Christmas tree and the nanny followed them.

 

 

Wang Yibo didn't reply, not because he was  angry or anything, but he was afraid that his voice would break into pathetic whimpers if he would open his mouth. 
Thus he silently walked to the kitchen, and made himself busy with washing some dirty glasses in the sink, trying hard to swallow his tears and to avoid those oh-so-missed pleading, pained and yearning eyes.
 
Even if he was looking in front, Yibo could feel Zhan's aura behind him.
He was anticipating nervously, but still he gasped loudly when familiars arms hugged him tightly from behind.

Xiao Zhan buried his nose in the crook of Yibo's warm neck, filling his lungs with that addicted scent he  has been missing so much.

 

 

 

"My love, please, don't say anything.
I know that this is wrong, but I needed fuel to charge my battery to survive further.
Seeing and touching you, gives me energy to continue further in