Nara’s POV

Two years later

It’s been two years and we’re still going strong. We argue at times but we always make up before entering the house. The only time we had a major argument that lasted for a week was when we were both really busy and just could not find the time to suit each other for a date. It is really lame, but perhaps because of the tiredness and the longing to be with each other, it ended up in an argument with hurtful words thrown at each other. I guess I hurt him more than he hurt me.

/FLASHBACK

“You have all the time in the world to go entertain fans on the streets but you don’t have the time to even meet me for an hour or so!? Yong Junhyung, what kind of crap is this!?” I yelled at him over the phone.

“Did I say no to meeting you? I just simply asked if we could meet at an earlier time. Why can’t you just compromise a little? And why are you pulling the fans in?” He asked.

“They’re more important than I am to you, no? Why? Because they give you all the money and fame you desire while all I can give you is nothing but myself!?” I shouted.

“Be reasonable, please. You know my job…” I cut him off before he could finish.

“Stop all the crap about your job! I hate your job! I ing hate your job! Why did I even date a celebrity in the first place!? Why did you even ask me to be your girlfriend!? Go find those fans, they’ll be more than happy to shower you with love and money like you desire!” I blabbered out.

I only realized how hurting my words sounded when he was silent on the other line. I could hear his struggled breathing, as thou he was trying to hold back his tears.

“I…” I mumbled.

“You’re right. Why did you even agree to date a celebrity in the first place? Why did I even ask you to be my girlfriend in the first place when I know that I cannot give you the kind of love you desire? Who am I to love? I’m just a piece of puppet in the society that entertains people for a living. Who am I to love?” He said softly.

“Junhyung…” I sighed, feeling so sorry.

“But I thought out of all people, you’ll understand that I became a celebrity not for the fame and money, but because I really love what I am doing. Music. Dance. Performing. I thought you would understand. But I guess I am wrong. Hey, I’m really sorry.” He said.

“No no.. It’s not like that. I… I was just angry and I blabbered nonsense. Junhyung, it’s not like that.” I hurriedly explained.

“I really love you, you know. But I was greedy. I wanted more than just watching you silently. I wanted you to be mine, despite knowing how much it would ruin you. What have I done? Hahaha~” He laughed bitterly.

“Please… I’m so sorry.” I said.

“No, baby. I am sorry.” He said.

We were silent over the phone for a while.

“Maybe we should…” He broke the silence.

“NO! NO! NO!” I yelled, knowing what he wanted.

“NO! Please, don’t break up with me. I was stupid, I was dumb, I said idiotic things, I hurt you. I’m so sorry! I don’t mean it at all! You know how brainless I can get when I am angry, right? I let anger take over my emotions and my whole self. I’m sorry, Darling. Please forgive me. Don’t break up with me because of something like that. Please…” I begged.

“But I…” His voice cracked.

“We’ll meet later! Whatever time you can make it! I’ll wait for you. Even if it’s 3AM, I’ll wait for you. We’ll talk things out, okay? Please?” I pleaded.

“Alright. See you later. I’ll… text you.. or something.” He said softly.

“Eat something.” I said, knowing that he has been skipping meals because of work.

“You too. Don’t… cook.” He said.

“I love you.” I said.

“Mmm..” He ended the call. Usually he would be the first to say ‘I love you’, sometimes I would reply him with the same, but most of the times I just laughed. Not because I don’t love him, but because it was cheesy to say it, despite being together for so long. But now I know how much it hurts not getting the reply back.

“Damn you, Nara. How could you even say such things to him? You were the one who assured him that despite being a celebrity, he deserve it all. And now you make him feel like he is at fault for loving you. You deserve to die!” I scolded myself.

I waited all night for him. I struggled to stay awake, but I was dozing off. I fell asleep eventually and was woken up by my phone.

“You’re asleep?” He asked.

“Huh? Asleep? NO! I’m awake! Where are you?” I asked, waking myself up.

“It’s alright, we’ll talk another day then. Sleep well.” He said.

“NO! Yong Junhyung! NO!” I yelled.

“Sorry for yelling.” I apologized.

“It’s okay.” He said softly.

“Where are you?” I asked.

“I just ended work.” He said.

I looked at the time. It was 4.30AM.

“So late…” I mumbled.

“Yea.” He said.

“Have you eaten?” I asked.

“Yes.” He said.

“Let’s meet, huh?” I said.

“Sure.” He said.

I hate his single word answers.

“The usual?” I asked.

“Alright.” He said.

“See you there.” I ended the call.

I rushed to freshen up and then went to the nearby convenience store to get him some food. I bet when he says he has eaten, it is like at noon or something. When I arrived at our usual, which is a playground, he was not there yet.

I settled the bag of food aside and sat on the swing. I yelped when I felt someone push me from behind. I turned back to see Junhyung smiling at me. He looked so tired and his eyes were red from tiredness.

“You scared me.” I said.

“Really? Haa~ Sorry.” He settled down on the swing next to me.

“I got you food.” I said, handing him the bag.

“I thought I said I eaten.” He said, looking inside the bag.

“Eaten last year is considered eaten too.” I said.

He chuckled and took out the onigiri from inside. I bought him two onigiri and a bottle of soymilk. He opened the onigiri, handing it out to me for a bite.

“You eat it.” I said.

“Just have a bite.” He said. I took a small bite anyway.

“Junhyung ah~” I called out.

“Hmm?” He said, chewing on the rice.

“I’m sorry.” I said, looking at him.

He looked at me, and then smiled with his stuffed cheeks. He looked like a hamster.

“I know words said cannot be taken back. But can I take back what I said about you? Please?” I pleaded.

He shrugged his shoulders.

I got off the swing and sat in front of him. He looked at me, surprised.

“I was pissed.” I said, playing with his shoes.

“I miss you so much. I miss the days you sleepover at my place. I miss the times you would cook ramen for me at 3AM. I miss falling asleep in the cinema with you, doodling on your arm. I miss the times where we stay in the café till morning, where I’ll study and you’ll work. I miss lying in your arms, you playing with my hair until I fell asleep. I miss you lying on my lap, and then I’ll pat your chest lightly till you fall asleep. I miss all the times I spent with you.” I said, not looking up.

His hands fell to his lap, his half-eaten onigiri in my face.

“I know it is stupid to be jealous of your fans. It is even stupider to said those mean words to you. But I miss you! I want you! I am jealous because your fans can be so close to you but while I live next to you, I can’t even touch you anymore!” I raised my voice.

He patted my head lightly.

“I was never angry.” He said.

I looked up at him.

“Your words were hurting, no doubt. But I deserve it.” He said.

“No you don’t!” I said, on the verge of tears.

“I do, Nara. I do. I thought about it just now.” He said, serious out of a sudden.

“Please…” I pleaded, holding his hand.

“Let me finish.” He said.

“I thought about it, and I realized what you said was true. I have the time to entertain fans, but I did not leave any time for my girlfriend who means so much to me. I put all my heart into my work and totally forgot the fact you need me too. I’ve been wanting you to put up with me, compromise with me, but I’ve never thought about you. As much as I need you, I forgot you need me too.” He said.

“You’ve always been independent and strong, I took that for granted. Sorry, baby, I’m sorry.” He said.

He cupped my cheeks.

“Give me a chance to make it better. Please?” He said.

I nodded.

He bend down, crashing his soft lips against mine, kissing me deeply.

“Taste of salmon.” I smacked my lips.

He covered his mouth in embarrassment.

“I like salmon!” I laughed, pulling his hand down.

We sat at the playground and chatted while he ate.

“I love to watch you eat.” I said.

“Why?” He asked with his mouth full.

“Don’t’ know. It’s like… So cute and satisfying seeing you eat.” I said, wiping his mouth.

He grinned with his stuffed cheeks. Hamster, again.

“What is this!?” I yelled when I saw the scratches on his arms when his sleeve lifted.

“Nothing.” He hurried to cover them.

I forcefully pulled his sleeves up. I frowned at the fresh scratches and bruises. I knew his problem. I freaked out when I saw him hurt himself at first, but as time passed, I learned to calm him down. He got better already. He would not take it out on himself these days, but I guess today I forced that part of him out again.

“I’m sorry.” He apologized, looking down in embarrassment.

“No. I caused it. I’m sorry.” I said, kissing the scratches on his arms.

“But promise me don’t do it again, please?” I said.

He nodded.

“I’m going to cut your nails later.” I said, looking at his mid length fingernails.

He laughed and nodded.

“So sleepy.” He mumbled, eyes closing.

“Let’s go then.” I said, clearing the rubbish for him.

“AHH!” I heard a loud thud as I was throwing the rubbish into the bin.

I turned back to find Junhyung face down on the floor.

“YAH! WHAT HAPPENED!?” I ran back to him.

“I.. don’t know…” He whined.

Fortunately, he fell on a rubber floor, but there were still cuts on his nose, chin and lips.

“Are you that tired??” I help him sit up.

He shook his head.

“I tripped.. Or something.” He said.

I gasped when I looked at his shoes. He look at his shoes, and then back at me.

“Oh no.” I mumbled.

“Yah~ Is this revenge?” He asked, looking at the shoelaces of both side of his shoes tied together.

I was playing with his shoelaces as we talked, and I totally forgot about it.

“No… I… Sorry…” I pouted as I dabbed off the blood on his cuts with a tissue.

“How am I going to go on stage like this?” He asked.

“Then don’t. Like that you can stay at home and we can be together.” I smiled.

“Oh, so this was your motive.” He said.

“NO!!!” I whined.

“Aieee it hurts~” He touched his cut lightly.

“Sorry.” I kissed his cheek.

“Never mind. At least it wasn’t because I tripped on air or something.” He said.

“Awww~” I made a face at him.

I retied his shoelaces for him. We held onto each other’s waist as we walked back slowly, enjoying the silence of the night.

/END OF FLASHBACK

“What are you thinking of?” He asked, sitting on the bed suddenly.

“Nothing. Just you.” I smiled, staring at the scar on his lip left by the cut that day.

“I’m nothing?” He teased.

“You’re everything.” I said, tracing the scar on his lip with my finger.

“So sorry about this.” I said.

“Nah~ It makes me manlier.” He laughed.

“Right~” I said.

“Done packing?” I asked.

“Almost.” He said, sounding upset.

“Come on, don’t be like that.” I said, pulling him into my embrace.

“Why can’t you come too?” He asked, pouting.

Beast was shifting to another dorm. Partly because they deserved a bigger dorm, and also partly because of us. His company knew about our relationship and although they did not force us to break up, he was warned to be careful. He was indeed careful, but fans are powerful. They almost found out a few times. I was safe, because I wasn’t exposed yet, but they kept harassing Junhyung, and he even got a few death threats, in which I am so thankful it did not happen.

“It defeats the purpose of shifting if I came along, right?” I said, pushing his hair out of his face.

“I’ll miss you so much.” He pouted.

“You’re just shifting to across the street, not to another estate or something.” I laughed.

“It’s still far. I’ll miss you. I can never sleep well anymore.” He said.

“Don’t be silly.” I said, helping him pack his stuff.

“Oh, you still keep this?” I laughed, looking at his torn passport.

“Of course I’ll keep it. I’ll keep this forever.” He said.

I looked at it, laughing as I remembered our epic fight in the airport.

“I’m kinda thankful it happened thou.” He said.

“Why?” I asked.

“If not for this, we would never have met. If I did not get angry that day and accuse you of stealing, you would not have gotten angry and tore up my stuff. I would not have remembered you so clearly.” He said.

“I really, really, really did not steal your passport.” I said.

“I know. Of course I do. The lost and found is so secluded even I couldn’t find it.” He said.

“Then why did you keep saying it was me?” I asked.

“I was narrow minded. And perhaps also angry at myself. I needed to blame someone for my own carelessness.” He explained.

“And so I became the victim.” I said.

“Aren’t I your victim now?” He asked, sticking his face close to me.

“Oh, I didn’t know you feel so victimized in our relationship.” I said.

“NO! I didn’t mean it that way! I mean…. Aren’t I all yours now?” He said.

I laughed and kissed him on his cheek.

“You found my passport, and I found you, I guess, its okay~” He said.

“Okay only?” I asked.

“It’s the best!” He yelled, grinning.

“But I still don’t want to go!” He pouted. How fast his emotions change.

“We’ll meet at the park as and when. My door is always open for you for sleepovers or whatever you want to do.” I said.

“Hyung! Are you done!?” Dongwoon shouted from outside.

“NO!” Junhyung yelled.

“YES!” I yelled back.

He sighed as we got up and out of the room. We took one last look at the empty house before Doojoon closed the door.

“Goodbye, home for the past years.” He said softly.

I walked them out to the street. It was really late, so there were almost no one around.

“Nara, will you be okay?” Yoseob asked.

“I’ll survive.” I laughed.

“Baby~” He hugged me tightly.

“Come on~ I’m not going to leave or something.” I caressed his back.

But I was feeling upset too, honestly. Although they were just shifting across the street, it was still far away. We will never be able to eat dinner at each other’s place so conveniently. I will never be able to laugh at their screams in my own house. No one would be knocking on my door at 12AM asking to be let in because someone was going to kill him. It will be so quiet without them.

“Who is going to check if you’ve locked your door properly now? Who is going to make sure you’re asleep at 4AM and not awake doing work? Who is going to cook your ramen at 3AM? Who is going to dash in if something explodes again? Who?” Junhyung asked, looking really sad.

“I’ll do it. I’ll do all the things you once did for me.” I said.

“Promise me you wouldn’t hurt or kill yourself.” He said.

“I wouldn’t.” I cupped his cheeks.

He was making it sound like they are migrating to some other country.

“Don’t hesitate to call me for anything. Even at 3AM, you want ramen, call me. I’ll walk across the street with the pot in my hand.” He said.

“You’ll look weird!” I laughed.

“I don’t care!” He said.

“Alright, alright. I get it. And if you need a massage or if you feel sick, call me, even at 3AM, I’ll run across the street with medicine and a blanket for you.” I said.

The other boys were cringing behind.

“Hyung… Please~” Dongwoon shuddered.

We thought Junhyung will curse at him but instead his reaction made us laugh.

“I’m sad!” He pouted, stomping his foot like a child.

“Awww~” I hugged him tight.

“Love you.” I whispered into his ear.

“Love you too.” He said.

We pulled apart.

“Take care guys.” I said, waving at them.

I winked at Junhyung who was still pouting.

‘Call me.’ I mouthed.

He nodded and went to join them. I watch them walk off to a distance before turning my back to head back inside.

“YAH! NARA AH!!!” I heard my name being yelled out of a sudden.

I turned back in shock. I saw the boys across the road, standing in position. I heard music blasting. It sounded like one of their songs; Beautiful.

And then they started dancing. I covered my mouth in surprise. I was laughing and crying at the same time. He really did it. Once, I was watching a drama with Junhyung and there was a scene where the girl requested the boy to dance for her across the street. I casually told Junhyung to do it for me, but he rejected me flatly, telling me it is so embarrassing. I laughed as I expected his respond.

Although he did not do it alone in a street filled with people, it was good enough he actually made the effort to do it. I squat down, covering my mouth as I watch them dance. He was literally yelling ‘Beautiful’ whenever it was that part. I laughed even harder when they started dancing towards me. I was torn between enjoying their dance and looking out for cars.

“Nothing better than you!” He panted, squatting in front of me.

“Oh my goodness!” I pulled him into a tight hug,.

I could feel his sweat against my skin and his fast heartbeat from all that sudden dancing.

“I love you!” I yelled, kissing his cheek, tasting the salty taste of his sweat.

“Hahaha~ My beautiful girl~” He laughed, his cheeks flushed.

“Don’t we get a hug too?” The other boys asked.

“No!” Junhyung hugged me tight.

“Aigoo~ Possessive boyfriend~” Doojoon teased.

Junhyung stuck out his tongue at them.

“Thank you so much.” I whispered.

“Anything for you.” He said.

After we parted, I went back. I showered and sat on my bed. I still could not believe he did it for me. My phone rang, snapping me out of my thoughts.

“Hello, beautiful girl?” He called out.

“Hi, gorgeous boy.” I laughed.

We chatted through the night. Although we were blocks apart, our heart and soul still remains one. This is more than enough.