“You’re doing it wrong.”

“Huh?” Blinking out of your reverie, and looking at Ashley standing beside you in confusion, you watched as she took your access card out of your hand and beeped it for you. The gates to the subway opened, and she prodded you through the terminal.

“Everything okay with you?” she wondered, and you continued to stare unfocused at your best friend, her eyebrows furrowing together. “You’ve been quiet all day long.”

“I’m tired.”

“You’re seeing him again, aren’t you?”

“Who?”

Ashley gave you a knowing look. “Lauri and Claudia told me they saw Kihyun around your area. I know you too well. You couldn’t stay away.”

“Are you mad with me?” you questioned, slumping down onto a seat when the doors opened to the train. Ashley joined you.

“No, I have no reason to be mad.”

“Disappointed then? I always hated when my Mum would say I’m not mad, I’m just disappointed. Please don’t be like that with me.”

“I’m surprised it took this long,” she admitted and then bit her lip, lowering her head guiltily. “I have something to confess.”

“Hm?” you hummed, staring blankly at Ashley.

“I saw Kihyun two years ago. We crossed paths, and he stopped me and asked how you were. I told him you were doing great without him, and he looked pretty dejected. He admitted he still thought of you often and how he had gone to therapy over your relationship.”

“Therapy?” you echoed, blinking slowly at the concept.

Ashley nodded. “Apparently he was worried and wanted to ensure he was fit as a person and a partner before finding someone else. But he realised whilst doing what he had, the desire to change only came from wanting to be better in a relationship with you. He told me he had tried to date but believed you were the only one his heart ever wanted.”

“Kihyun said all of this to you?” you breathed, and Ashley sighed heavily.

“I told him you were engaged.”

“What?!”

“At the time, I was annoyed. I didn’t want to hear how he had improved. I didn’t hate him, but I’m your friend. I wanted to protect you from him forever. I didn’t want you to end up on my doorstep crying anymore.”

“I can kind of understand your reaction.”

Ashley took one of your hands and patted it. “You’re not twenty-one anymore, Y/N. Nor is he. And maybe he’s right. He seemed really adamant about how he felt for you, and when I lied to him, the look on his face… I left quickly because I felt so bad for breaking him like that.”

“He told me the other day that he was still in love with me,” you admitted softly, blinking back your emotions. The sentence was the catalyst for you spilling everything that had happened so far, aside from the in-depth details about what happened in your bedroom. Ashley gripped the hand she still held and shook it. “How do you feel about all of this?”

“I can’t deny there’s something still between us, but I’m still worried about a repeat of the past.”

“Push that aside for a moment. What does your heart think?”

A giddy smile crossed your lips. “I feel something strongly about him too.”

“Then why are you holding back? The past doesn’t have to dictate your relationship now. You’ve both grown from back then, and will no doubt have better coping mechanisms than your stressed-out university days. I’m not saying it might not happen either but if your heart is singing out for him too, isn’t it worth trying again?”

“You really think so?”

Ashley smiled. “Clauds and Lauri are right. When you talked about him just now to me, you seemed different. I’m happy for you.”

“Do you mind if I don’t come over tonight?” you asked, and your friend laughed.

“Go find Kihyun and tell him how you feel.”

You got off at the next stop and then hailed a taxi, giving over the address to Kihyun’s house. The whole ride over, you were jittery. Not because of nerves, though. You knew even if you still had to work through some of the remaining fear about your past relationship with Kihyun, right now, you were certain about how you felt.

You wanted to be with him. Not just for the passion either. You wanted everything that came with dating someone. The urge within you was so strong that your mind was concrete on the idea now.

You loved him.

Once you reached your destination, you went over to his front door and knocked on it repeatedly until it opened, Kihyun clearly surprised to see you there. “I thought you had plans for tonight?”

“I love you too,” you confessed, in a deep breath. “I’m sorry it took me this long to tell you how I felt. I don’t want to just sleep with you. I want it all.”

Kihyun pulled you into an embrace, hugging you tightly. “I would have waited forever to hear those words.”

“Well now you don’t need to,” you replied, smiling up at him. “I’m ready to try again with you.”