"Taengo, stop that! Enough." I complained. I never thought that Taeyeon turned out to be a heavy drinker like that. She ordered another glass of shot around three minutes ago after I told her to stop, but she had to, and I had to stop her no matter what. She's drunk already. "I said, enough."
"Sica... I'm fine..."
"Look at you. Clearly not."

Irritated, I forced her a little. I grabbed her arm so we could get out of there quickly. After chatting that afternoon with her and Soojung Unnie, I invited Taeyeon for a chat session together at a bar where I used to go. It's just that what I didn't predict was that she drank a lot of alcohol. With great care, I carried her into my car and drove straight towards her hotel. She was fast asleep in the passenger seat next to me and within a few minutes I was checking her condition anxiously because I felt a significant rise in her body temperature.

After 15 minutes driving, we arrived in that deluxe room where she slammed her body down to the bed instantly. The temperature was quite warm inside but she grabbed the soft purple blanket to cover her body fully as she looked like holding the pain from the coldness she felt. A little frustratred, I rushed myself to get her a hot tea pot.

"Hey..." I rubbed her forehead. "Wake up for a while. Drink this."
"Where am I?"
"Heaven. Facing your angel."
"You?"
"Of course."
"Then it's not heaven."
"Yahhhh!" I tapped her head gently, smilling a little.
"Sooyeon-ah... That hurts..."
"Good! Now drink this."

When she started sipping tea in her blue plain teacup, I slowly took off the shoes that were still attached to her feet, removed the buckle from her waist while she just stared at me in silence, of course with a very limp body condition. To be honest I was still worried about her condition which I thought was a bit feverish, so I went back to check her condition, I again held her forehead and felt her body temperature.

"Sica... Gwenchana..."
"So, you're a heavy drinker now."
"Did you quit?"
"I only drink when I have to."
"Sooyoung asked you to?"

I pulled myself a little, narrowing my eyebrows.
"Nobody asked me. I do this for myself."

The two of us stared at each other silently. I didn't know why, but I didn't like the way she talked. Did Sooyoung ask me to quit smoking? Whatever I feel about it, I tried to ignore that and moved on. Suddenly Taeyeon started coughing surprisingly and I panicked enough to respond. I gave her a glass of water and gently her back.

"Taengo-yah! Are you sick?" I bit my lips. "Lay down, please..."
"I don't know. I feel terrible..."
"Of course you are. I told you to stop drinking!"
"Sooyeon-ah... Lower your voice..."
"I'm sorry..."

Later I decided to adjust the warmer and when I looked at her, she wrapped herself in a thick blanket.

"Jessica..."

I turned my body to react.

"Sica..."
"Ne?"
"Erick Oppa."

I moved closer, sitting right beside her.

"What about him?"
"He met me around last week."
"Are you for real?"
"Yeah..."
"It's been years."
"He'll get married soon."
"So?" I was so confused.
"He came to me just to make sure we had no unfinished business between us." Taeyeon replied, with her eyes closed. "He said it's still bothered him, the fact that I suddenly broke him up, asking who made me change my heart just like that. I guess he just wanted to make sure that he's not gonna regret it. He wanted to know if I left him for someone else..."

I decided to zip my lips for a while, bringing myself back to that day, years ago. I remembered how they broke up, but I just couldn't seem to find an answer when it comes to her reason, meaning only Taeyeon and God really know about the reason why. A deeper sigh, I hated the way I remembered about that certain feeling I felt back then and that I was trapped in between.

"And?" I finally replied. It was hard.
"I said he can go on... I have nothing left for him and whatever made me change my heart, that's a part of my personal life that I won't share."
I tilted my head, wondering. "But Taengo... Don't you think it's a little unfair?" I said. "I mean, he must love you so much that he came like that after years. Beside, I'm actually the one who don't know about you reason as well. After everything he's done for you—"
"Should I keep him for what he's done for me?"
"It's not it..."
"I don't know... I just... Want to sleep for now."

The air was getting colder for both of us as the silence filled the gap between us. I was thinking hard. How was I supposed to do while I didn't even know how she felt for everything? Taeyeon is a secretive melancholy woman I know since forever and there's nothing I could do—not even me—could make her speak things she didn't want to tell. Slowly, I looked down and saw her closing her eyes, caressing her soft messy bangs.

"Taengo... Is that true?"


With her eyes closed, she replied. "What?"
"That."
"What's that?"

I smiled softly as I braced myself to ask her about it.
"Is that true..." I gulped. "That you left him for someone else?" No answer still after seconds passed. I stared at her, wishing that she would tell me something, something I should've never wished for. The silence between us made me really feel uncomfortable, so once again, I braced myself to her hair. "I'm... I'm your bestfriend. I'm still your bestfriend, am I not? You know you can tell me anything, Taeng. Anything... I know, lately we're so busy as we're getting older now. But I want you to know that what bothers you, that'll bother me too. So, for all the feelings you have in you, you can always share it to me... like we used to."

After finishing my words which were quite messy–exactly reflecting my mind that time—I heard nothing but the roar of her soft comforting breath, which indicated that she had fallen asleep soundly. Slightly disappointed, I pulled the covers over his entire body and turned off the main lights in the hotel room. It's almost 1 AM when I stared at an alarm clock above the night stand. I leaned on the headboard, right next to Taeyeon who was sleeping soundly.

My cellphone vibrated that I immediately checked it. A short message from Sooyoung.


"Ah... It's from Sooyoung." I murmured. "Taeng... I think she's looking for me, so I will need to go home soon."

I muttered to myself. Taeyeon was fast asleep, but I still felt the need to say it. I grabbed my bag and tidied up my things to hurry away from the room and let Taeyeon rest comfortably. I reached into my bag for a box of refreshing candy when my cell phone rang loudly. Sooyoung called me. At first I thought about calling her when I got in the car, but she called ahead.

"Aish... She really can't wait me for me to reply, can she?" I murmured softly.