The dimly lit bar pulsated with a rythmic beat of energetic tunes as Eunha found herself giving in a rather pathetic attempt to divert the complexities of her situation. 

Her friends had already left early, reasoning the late hours would make it difficult to attend classes the next morning, leaving Eunha to grapple alone swirling what little amber content remains in her glass. S far, it had did wonders in numbing the complex range of emotions that had recently garnered permanent residencies within the compounds of her heart. 

It was a futile attempt of an escape, Eunha recognised that very much as she asked for another glass of the bitter drink from the bartender, who complied without a word.

But now alone with nothing but the intrusive beat of music in the background that she didn't particularly enjoy, she once again found herself immersed in the depths of her thoughts.

Being those stupid... stupid thoughts...

It had become a place she grew to despise. After all, it was the constant immersion in thoughts about Sojung that led to these relentless petals surging to escape her lungs.

And now, all because of these stupid thoughts, her once amazing friendship with SinB is threatened... and perhaps... even her life..

"Sowon..." she murmured to herself in a tipsy state. "Where did it all go wrong... why are you making me feel this way... its too unfair... take some responsibility.." she wondered if she appeared somewhat crazy to the people around her, talking to herself like that.

Taking another sip in search for further liquid refuge, she bit her bottom lip soon after, realising the solace this method had once brought her, is no longer working. Sighing she places her head down onto her arm, too exhausted from thinking... too exhausted from coughing... too exhausted with

Feelings.

It was all just too much. Eventually, she surrendered to the ceaseless thoughts spiraling in her head, abandoning her attempt to block them and allowing them to run wild.

Where did it all go wrong? Well.. to answer that, Eunha must wonder, was anything ever right?


"Eunha..." SinB had said to her before leaving her room more than a week ago. "Why... why is this happening" Her eyes were filled with hurt and betrayal "Did you really mean it when you said you wanted me to be happy..?"

Eunha didn't answer her childhood friend, and SinB did not press on after receiving the silence, promptly leaving right after without saying another word.

I did... Eunha had wanted to say then

I do! She wanted to scream out.

Because she truly did.

She cares about SinB.

Wholeheartedly she wanted nothing but the best for her bestfriend.

She knew that for a fact.

But..

Can't I be happy too?
 

And she can't lie. The way SinB had looked at her then destroyed her. She squeezed her hand into a tight fist as more guilty thoughts entered her brain.

I've considered the surgery for you SinB, so you could be with her... I was willing to destroy my feelings for her.. so you could be happy... 

Her heart began to feel heavy in a way she couldn't quite explain.

It was like something was pushing and pulling against it at the same time, creating a pressure that became bearly tolerable.

I've supported you and her.... so so much.... so why did you have to look at me like that... just because... just because I've developed feelings for her as well...?

Don't you want me to be happy too?

...

...

.. I'm actually awful...

She forced her eyes shut, trying to shake off the eerie feeling in the pits of her stomach that was making her nauseous. 

"Hey, you're just my type," Eunha could hear a man in the background, presumably speaking to a rather unlucky girl. It was a typical night in a bar indeed. His words dripped with desperation, and Eunha couldn't help but feel a twinge of pity.

but as he continued to latch on to his undefeating plea for the other woman's number, the whole ordeal became quite cringey to keep listening to.

Why did Eunha even wanted to come here in the first place again?


Oh that's right...

She found out a while back this was Sojung's getaway with her own circle of friends.

Unconsciously, Eunha too started hanging out at the bar more and more too... not really sure what her main objective was for doing so. Convincing herself at the time, it was because of a friend's recommendation.. so it's only natural right?

Thinking back now.. her reasons might be more obvious than anything.

This spot... apart for a few friends she invited today (Who are blindly not aware of any shaningans that is currently unpacking within Eunha's life) and her goals of continuously visiting... was something she told nobody.

Especially not SinB.

It was one of the first details about Sojung that Eunha had kept from SinB...

Yeah..

She indeed felt like a terrible friend.

Perhaps she is.

"Come on... just your number? Please?"


Her head couldn't help but turn in curiosity, wanting to identify which creepy guy was hitting on which unlucky girl now. To her surprise, she found none other than the girl who had turned her world upside down herself.

"Sojung..." She muttered under her breath, head slightly lifted off her arms now.

This was the first night, despite her many nights of visits, she was finally able to see the older in this bar, despite having known about this place for ages now. 

huh... that's funny... Aren't I just doing exactly what I gave SinB a hard time about at the cafe?

She internally cursed at her own hypocritical and pathetic nature.

"No, sorry I'm not interested."

oh...

Even the way she rejects people looks and sounds so goddamn classy.

She chuckled at herself with that very thought, contemplating how she must appear to others now—especially the bartender not too far away from her.

Eyes not leaving the taller, but head plopped back down once again... Eunha wondered to herself then, if any of this was even worth it. Seeing the whole scene unfold in front of her had placed more doubt into her heart than ever.

She wonders...

If the flower were even worth coughing...

and more importantly

If she or SinB even had a chance.

because to  be honest, Eunha had always been aware of Sojung's popularity with others. Even when they were together alone there had been occasions where the taller of the two would get approached and asked out.

Now don't get Eunha wrong... She, too, had her fair share of having to turn down people. There was even an instance when it happened in front of Sojung.

So she understands these situations were sometimes inevitable

But looking at Sojung now... even in the midst of turning someone down, Eunha couldn't help but ponder, just how many people must be interested in her...

Were the two Eunbis the only ones harboring feelings with roots deep within their lungs for her?

Did Eunha... stand a chance at all... not just against SinB... but against everyone else?

And ultimately, did Eunha even desire to compete against others, particularly her best friend?

Best friend...

Her heart aches again.

Just how could she be doing this to her best friend...?

She wishes... so so much... she hadn't fallen in love with the same person that SinB loves...


Her eyes locked with Sojung's admist her dilemma induced thoughts, causing the initial squeezing in her chest, caused by guilt, to change into something a lot more abrupt.

Without thinking she lifted an arm behind her head to signal a waving motion as Sojung walked towards her, A smile now adorned her face, replacing the seriousness she had exhibited while rejecting the unwelcome attention earlier.

"Eunha" She said warmly "Why are you here drinking alone?"

"I could ask you the same thing"

"Fair" She took a seat next to Eunha and proceeded to order herself a glass of wine "My friend's left early, so it's just me alone. I was going to follow them, but then I got... caught up" She points at the old creep that was still hanging around the bar.


Watching Sojung take a sip of the drink that just arrived in front of her, observing.. maybe a bit too closely of the way the older had gulped down her drink.. Eunha finally leaned up from her position. "When do you not. I mean look at you"


"Look at me?" The taller points at herself and raises an eyebrow "What do you mean?"


"You're beautiful." 

Now in all fairness to Eunha, she was not sober... so in her defence right now, the words were spoken from the alcohol in her bloodstreams... giving her confidence she would otherwise not normally have.

Sojung's eyes widened slightly at the younger's confession though.. "You think so?"


"Do I think so?" Eunha is up straight now, facing the other. "Do you even look at yourself in the mirror?" Yeah... it was definitely the alcohol right..? "You're pretty... so so pretty, I can just look at you all day." 

Alright perhaps even the alcohol couldn't have made her ignore that one, immediately covering with her hands, Eunha's cheeks begins turning crimson red.

Kill me... Were the first thoughts that came to mind right after.

"Sorry-" her hands flaired up as she frantically tried to save her situation "I- I mean"


She didn't finish her sentence, as the light chuckle emitted from the taller promptly made her words trail off.

"Jesus Jung Eunbi, just how much did you drink" Sojung said, a hand covering while she continued to lightly chuckle and her other reached out to lower Eunha's arm that was still up from before. "I think you're prettier, especially here" She lightly grabbed the shorter by the cheek and gave it a teasing squish. "See? adorable too"

Smiling at Eunha again... the younger swears Sojung's eyes are more sparkly than ever before... even in the darkness of this bar. She was so lost in them, she hardly noticed the pinching on her cheek.

Were Sowon's eyes always this pretty...?

Unknowingly, her own hand reach up to grab ahold of Sojung's which were still placed on her cheeks. As Sojung lowered her hands, Eunha didn't release her grip; instead, their hold on each othered remained interlocked, now resting gracefully on Eunha's lap.

Sojung not commenting on Eunha's behaviour, allowed the younger to do as she pleased.

"And you still haven't answered my question from before?"


"Huh?" Eunha blinks a couple of times before registering what the older was implying. "My friend's also left me but I needed another drink."


"That's unlike you, I could've sworn you were more of a social drinker"


"You're right... but" Eunha looked away from Sojung's eyes and finally lets go of her hands "I guess I just have a lot on my mind right now.."


Humming, the barista follows Eunha's body language, turning away in a mirrored gesture. She starts to swirl her wine glass, observing the red contents within it create a mesmerizing pattern. Leaning her cheek on her left hand, she looks at Eunha, "Care to share?"


"Oh- I"


"If y