Eyes like fire - Burn desire
As we dance away into the night

This attraction - Fuels a passion
That's just too strong for us to try and fight

Each moment we're together
I just never want to end
'Cause I could never feel this way again

'Cause nothing else had ever felt so right
To feel your body lying next to mine
As the rhythm of your heart beats through me
All through the night
I never thought I'd ever realize
A long that feels so close to paradise
Girl I could spend my whole life living
Forever in your eyes

Lips so tender - I surrender
Everything I am is yours alone

When you touch me - All that I see
Is feeling that my heart has never known

You're all I ever dreamed of
you're my every fantasy
Whoever thought on angel could bring heaven here to me

'Cause nothing else had ever felt so right
To feel your body lying next to mine
As the rhythm of your heart beats through me
All through the night
I never thought I'd ever realize
A long that feels so close to paradise
Girl I could spend my whole life living
Forever in your eyes

You're the one my heart beats for
You're my everything and more
It's a burnin' love I can't seem to ignore
All the things I feel inside
Are too strong for me to hide (baby)
I need you by my side
'Cause I could live forever in your eyes

'Cause nothing else had ever felt so right
To feel your body lying next to mine
As the rhythm of your heart beats through me
All through the night
I never thought I'd ever realize
A long that feels so close to paradise
Girl I could spend my whole life living
Forever in eyes

 

-

 

Lying next to her; her warmth; her tight embrace and soft kisses on my forehead – they were just perfect. You couldn’t deny anything; your heart just kept swelling with love and all you wanted to do was to stay like this with her for the rest of your life.

 

Cringey-worth? Yeah, most probably and I used to hate it but now I have embraced it fully. So, deal with it. Even Hyejin and Moonbyul unnie gave up on us. We have overtaken them for being the most cringey-worth couple back in college.

 

The first time I saw her – she was blatantly staring at me. I could see the passion in her eyes. And I could somehow feel how much she wanted to come near me but she just couldn’t. And it didn’t help her at all when Moonbyul unnie kept annoying her at every second she could.

 

One morning, while waiting for Hyejin at the bus stop, I noticed her. She was standing at the far end of the bus stop; eyes on me but she was rooted to the ground for some reason. I kept watching her; amused and somehow my lips curled into a smile when Moonbyul unnie kept pushing her from behind; slowly approaching me.

 

I could see so much hesitation and nervousness in her eyes. I swear she was the cutest human being on earth that morning. It took her half an hour to approach me and when she finally did, I had to laugh. The comical sight of this woman – sent my heartstrings tugging at different directions.

 

“Don’t laugh. It’s difficult for me.”

 

“You’re just adorable. And do you even remember my name?”

 

“Of course, I do! Jung Wheein.”

 

“I prefer Wheein.”

“Oh, did I sound rude?!”

 

She started panicking again and I was once again, triggered with her adorability. Why was she so cute without doing anything?!

 

“No, it’s fine. But just call me Wheein.”

 

“Okay, Wheein. You can call me Yongsun unnie.”

 

“Hi, Yongsun unnie.”

 

Her cheeks were blushing red and I could see her face flushing. Oh, wait. She started coughing. Is she choking or something?

 

“Unnie?! Are you okay?”

 

She wanted to speak but I could see she was choking badly. I leaned closer and gently tapped on her back; her body was warmth.

 

“Are you having fever now?”

 

“No, no. I was just choking.”

 

“Why are you choking?”

 

“I guess I got too excited to learn your name. My saliva went down the wrong side – went down to my air pipe instead.”

 

I stared at her for 5 seconds before I burst out laughing. I didn’t mean to embarrass her like this but gosh, she was too adorable not to laugh at. I could she was dying to hide her face from me; well, she didn’t have to. I just like the way she is.

 

“Do you realize how cute you can get?”

 

“Huh? Are you teasing me again?”

 

“No. I’m genuine with my words. You’re so adoringly cute.”

 

Yongsun unnie became a tomato unnie for the rest of the day.

 

-

 

She gave me her contact number and we started texting each other. She made me feel at ease. She was loud and vibrant. She was animated and I really enjoyed watching her as she shared her days with me. There was so much in her eyes that I could just stare at them forever.

 

She’s attractive for sure. Pretty and I learnt she’s into Yoga. She’s into healthy living and she doesn’t mind trying all sorts of sports. She once shared that she hurt her back and her doctor introduced her to Pilates and yoga.  She was hooked on them ever since.

 

I happened to catch a glimpse of her abs. Dammit. I have never seen such defined abs on a woman before. I would always get excited when she was wearing her gym attire. Her physique; her muscular bod – you would get so turn on.

 

Okay, I sound creepy. But I couldn’t get her out of my mind since the day I saw her in that gym attire. I’m a woman; she’s a woman but I had the weirdest yet strongest attraction towards her. Hyejin was teasing me when she found out about my fantasy of Yongsun unnie.

 

“Heol! You’re gay!”

 

“Shut up.  You don’t have to make fun of me.”

 

“Listen, you should embrace it. Stop dating Yijeong. He’s not the one for you.”

 

“He’s Oppa to you.”

 

“No, to me, he’s such a jerk who thinks he owns the world and of course, you.”

 

Hyejin rolled her eyes. She has never liked Yijeong oppa. Not because she’s gay herself but Yijeong Oppa can be a jerk sometimes. Well, he thinks he’s good looking and that he could do anything he wants.

 

“What am I supposed to do with Yongsun unnie?”

 

“What do you mean by that?”

 

“I really like her a lot. I mean, I cannot go through a day without seeing her.”

 

“You’re so disgusting nowdays, Wheein! What’s wrong with you?!”

 

“Blame it on her! She made me like this!”

 

“Then tell her. Confess to her. Just do something about your ual fantasy of the woman before it kills you.”

 

“I DO NOT HAVE UAL FANTASY OF HER!”

 

“You drooled over her abs!”

 

“Who wouldn’t?!”

 

“I wouldn’t.”

 

“Well, you shouldn’t! You’re dating her best friend!”

 

“Pffts.”

 

“Oh, just shut up and leave me alone.”

 

It was so tormenting. I couldn’t understand why – why this heart wants Kim Yongsun so badly.

 

-

 

“Where is Hwasa?”

 

Hwasa is Hyejin. This woman has a nickname. Only her closest loved ones will call her Hyejin. Majority of her peers call her Hwasa.

 

“She’s with Moonbyul.”

 

“It’s just the two of us again?”

 

“Unnie, just get the hint. They don’t want us to be there while they are dating.”

 

I noticed her facial expression changed. She was nervous all over again. I wondered why.

 

“Are you uncomfortable for us to be together like this?”

 

“Uh, NO! I mean, I—I was just being shy.”

 

“We have been friends for almost a month now. You’re still being shy around me.”

 

“It’s difficult!”

 

“What is? Enlighten me. Or is it that you don’t like me?”

 

“Hell, no! There’s no way that would happen in any years to come.”

 

I was frowning away. That was a subtle hint. Does she like me or something? This Unnie was a little difficult to read. She was very private with her own matters.

 

“Unnie, are you sure you won’t hate me?”

 

“Why should I be?”

 

“Will you mind if I pry into your life further?”

 

“I think you can do that. Only you have the privilege.”

 

Her voice grew soft and almost inaudible. And I was trying to decipher her hidden messages under her confusing words. I was supposed to be smarter than this!

 

“Jung Wheein, one day you will understand why I’m like this.”

 

But I wanted to know now.

 

-

 

We were hanging out together, again, just the two of us. That two idiots kept bailing on us. We were supposed to watch movies together but Moonbyul unnie was “conveniently” sick and Hyejin gave an excuse. She needed to watch her “sick” girlfriend. I shall not go there.

 

So, there we were. Left alone; watching some horror flick (and this was Moonbyul unnie’s idea!) and I think it was just a trap. Yongsun unnie hates horror stuffs but she would act brave. I was the scaredy cat. I could do without horror movies. Oh, and the tickets were non-exchangeable.

I was literally rolling my eyes when the ticket vendor informed us.

 

“Okay, let’s just watch it. Since these tickets are free.”

 

“You do know your best friend and my best friend are setting this date for us.”

 

“I’m fully aware but I don’t want to waste these tickets. We can just scream at each other if it gets too scary.”

 

So, we ended up watching the movie. It was horrifying and terrifying. We weren’t the only ones screaming. I think the whole theatre did. But Yongsun unnie was awesome. I know she’s easily scared too but she bravely held my hand and hugged me tightly whenever I started to shiver in fear.

 

The movie was crazy! But I took this opportunity to explore my feelings further. What is it with Yongsun unnie that I could drop everything just to watch this stupid movie with her? How could I ditch my boyfriend so that I could spend the rest of evening with Yongsun unnie?

 

I didn’t feel guilty at all. I just wanted to be with Yongsun unnie. The movie ended well but I was mortified when I realized Yongsun’s arms were red and scratch marks were evident all over them.

 

“Oh my god, Unnie!”

 

“Wheein ah, are you the cat or Ggomo is?”

 

Ggomo is my cat. Yongsun unnie visited him once. She was so in love with him. And vice versa. That traitor cat!

 

“I’m so sorry! I didn’t realize that I was scratching you too much!”

 

“It’s fine. I can live my life telling stories of how I got scratched by an imaginary cat named Wheein.”

 

“Shut up. Come here, let me take a closer look.”

 

I pulled her closer and lifted her left arm. I bit my lower lip when I realized how bad it looked. I gently caressed those marks and she slightly winced.

 

“It hurts?”

 

“I guess so.”

 

That’s it. I dragged her to the nearest pharmacy. I bought some antiseptic lotion and cotton wool. She was trying to run away; insisting that she was fine.

 

“No, stay here. Stay put!”

 

I made her sat on the stone seats nearby. She was wriggling and squirming, but I held her down with my right thigh. I literally lifted my right leg and mounted on her.

 

“Hey!”

 

“I’ll put some antiseptic then I’ll let you go.”

 

She finally gave in and kept still. I applied the medicine carefully on the marks while she was staring at me. I could sense her. Then she winced and pulled her arm away. It must have stung so badly.

 

“It hurts?”

 

“I was daydreaming. Sorry, you can take my hand back. The pain just caught me by surprise.”

 

She then gleefully smiling away before handing her arm back to me. My heart skipped a beat when I saw that cheerful smile on her face. And it was even confusing when I had the strongest urge to kiss her.

 

Then she leaned closer; our faces were too close for comfort; her freaking lips were just inches away from mine. She was just looking at her scratch marks but I, I was taken aback at how close we were; how her soft breathing synchronized with my heartbeat.

 

God, please help me. What is this feeling I have inside? Why is it so overwhelming?

 

“Wheein ah, you’re so beautiful.”

 

Dammit.

 

-

 

She was upset with me over something. But I couldn’t figure out what it was. It was just fortnight ago when we had dinner together. We were dumped by that couple. I think one day we should try to dump on them instead.

 

But that wasn’t the point I was trying to say here. I was more agonized because Kim Yongsun was avoiding me. Ever since we had that conversation – that stupid conversation I had with her over boys.

 

Apparently, Yongsun unnie is single. And I was trying to get a double date with her if she was attached. What was I thinking? Did you think I could survive if she was with her boyfriend; acting lovey dopey in front of me?

 

See, dumb. Me. I was really stupid. I felt like an idiot and now, Yongsun unnie was avoiding me like plague. And it hurt. It hurt so badly. I couldn’t express my disappointment well, but I could explain how painful it was for me.

 

Her text messages were short and cold. It felt like as though she didn’t want to talk to me for that long.  I was in so much pain that I resorted to cry to sleep every night. It lasted for a month and I couldn’t take it any longer.

 

I was so stressed up not being next to her. I needed to see her. I needed a venue to rant.

 

“ANH HYEJIN! I NEED YOU.”

 

I called my best friend one night. I couldn’t handle this feeling.

 

“I’m with Unnie.”

“Please? I need you now.”

 

“Okay, wait for me. I’m coming over.”

 

“Unnie coming along?”

 

“No, Unnie said since you begged, something must be bad.”

 

“Bring her along. I need her help too.”

 

“Is this about Yongsun unnie?”

 

“Yes, that stupid woman. Faster come over and grab some food.”

 

-

 

“Let me get this right.”

 

Hyejin listened to my rants. Moonbyul unnie kept slapping her forehead a couple of times. She must have known something.

 

“You’re in love with Yongsun unnie.”

 

“Yes, which part of my words you didn’t understand?”

 

“And you said you’re not gay!”

 

“I cannot help it, okay? Kim Yongsun caught me in her web.”

 

“I TOLD YOU BEFORE! YOU LOVE HER!”

 

“But she’s avoiding me.”

 

“Because you mentioned boyfriend.”

 

Moonbyul unnie finally spoke up after the long silence. My intuition was right. She must have been upset with that double date topic.

 

“But why is she upset?”

 

Hwasa slapped my forehead hard.

 

“Ow! What was that for!?”

 

“You’re supposed to be smart!”

 

“I’m not perfect.”

 

“Okay, argument valid.”

 

“Shut up, Hyejin! You’re not helping me; you’re just mocking at me!”

 

Moonbyul unnie then sat in front of me; pulling her girlfriend away. Hyejin was sitting on her lap; facing her instead. She conveniently rested her head on Moonbyul unnie’s shoulder. I was jealous of that. Jealous because she has an Unnie to love.

 

“Wheein, do you know why she’s upset?”

 

“Why? I really wanted to know. I mean, is it really a taboo for her to mention boyfriend?”

 

“From what I know, she just dated one guy and that’s it.”

 

“Seriously? You’re lying.”

 

“I’m not. Yongsun unnie is a fragile and vulnerable. She falls in love easily and she gets hurt too. Because of her last relationship, Unnie is always afraid to take the step forward.”

 

I listened attentively to Moonbyul Unnie’s words. I finally got the answer.

 

“You mean, she likes me?”

 

“Yeah, she likes you so much. What makes you think she took 30 minutes just to get your name?”

 

I smiled fondly of that memory. Yongsun unnie was at her cutest back then. But then the truth sank in. Yongsun unnie likes me?!

 

“Are you really sure about it?”

 

“Wheein, she’s avoiding you because she couldn’t handle her heart breaking. And of course, she couldn’t look at you anymore because you’re someone’s else.”

 

“So, she’s hurting for a month. She’s hurting more than I do.”

 

“Wheein, you’re seeing a guy, right?”

 

“Yet she’s invading my mind every single second of my life. The moment I open my eyes in the morning and she’s the last thing on my mind. I just couldn’t sleep, and I really miss being with her; standing next to her; she babying me whenever I refuse to eat – all that; I miss so badly. And of course, her. I miss her.”

 

Moonbyul Unnie’s eyes grew larger. Hyejin was smiling slyly.

 

“That’s my girl! That’s my best friend! Now you’re talking. All you need to do is to break up with that jerk and be with Yongsun unnie.”

 

“Wait! Are you sure about your feelings? I mean, I don’t want Yongsun unnie to have false hopes.”

 

I could understand Unnie’s concerns. Of course, she wouldn’t want another heartbreak for Yongsun unnie. But I was certain about my own feelings.

 

“Unnie, I’ll break up with my boyfriend and I’ll find Yongsun unnie a week later. I promise you, Unnie. I will not hurt her.”

 

So, the couple devised a plan for my confession.

 

-

 

I could see Kim Yongsun from where I stood. Moonbyul unnie literally lifted her on her shoulder and carried her all the way to where we were. Hyejin was amused.

 

“My girlfriend is one annoying person.”

 

“But she’s also the one who loves Yongsun unnie the most.”

 

“Yeah, she does. She cares about Yongsun unnie a lot more than I expected.”

 

“Are you jealous?”

 

“No, I feel contented. I have a wonderful girlfriend who cares about her loved ones sincerely. I have no problems with that. Besides, Yongsun unnie is heads over heels on you.”

 

“So am I, Hyejin.”

 

“Get her, best friend! Love her and live happily. I can promise you. This is your last love and it will last forever. Trust me.”

 

I nodded. It was still mind-boggling on how I fell in love with Yongsun unnie. I watched as Yongsun unnie tried to push Moonbyul unnie away, but she somehow stopped when she noticed me.

 

She grew thinner than the last time I saw her. It was just for one month and she has lost all her baby fats around her cheeks. She looked more chiseled and leaner. Her shoulder muscles seemed bulkier than before.

 

Did she throw herself to the gym because of the heartbreak I gave her?

 

“Baby!!”

 

Hyejin squealed in delight as she jumped on her girlfriend. Then they conveniently left me and Yongsun unnie alone. Suddenly, I got tongue-tied. Yongsun unnie was restless too. I could see it in her eyes.

 

“Hello Unnie.”

 

I took the first step. She was startled at first but acknowledged my presence.

 

“Hey, Wheein.”

 

Gosh, I miss her voice so much.

 

“Shall we go? Those girls have left us behind.”

 

“Sure, let’s go then.”

 

We finally moved and caught up with the couple in front. I was walking next to Yongsun unnie. Her free hand was moving freely, and I was so tempted to catch it. I wanted to hold her hand; I wanted to hear her voice; I wanted to talk to her – I just wanted to stand right in front of her; looking into her eyes and let myself fall in love all over again.

 

Because I knew her heart. But she didn’t know mine. And I think I should make it clear to her before I lose this woman to someone else. I’m not going to let this happen.

 

“Unnie, can we talk?”

 

She didn’t stop; but somehow slowed down in her movements. Then, she finally stopped two steps ahead of me and slowly turned to look at me.

 

“Why are you avoiding me?”

 

She remained silent. She didn’t reply.

 

“Tell me. Why are you avoiding me?”

 

“I’m not.”

 

“Please don’t lie. You have been avoiding me for a month, Unnie.”

 

She looked away; tears b in her eyes. I could see how much she tried to hold back her tears and my heart ached so badly. I leaned forward; inched closer to her; I grabbed her right wrist and gently caressed my thumb on hers.

 

“Can you help me with something, Unnie?”

 

And then I confessed. I confessed how much I wanted to be with her. I confessed that I was no longer someone’s girl. I’m single just like her. I confessed to her – how much I wanted to make her mine; love her and hug her. And then kiss her again and again. I told her everything.

 

And then I put my arms around her. I leaned closer and rested my forehead on hers. She was taller than me so I could literally her soft breathing against my cheeks.

 

“I want to be with you. Are you ready to be mine? You know it’s going to be rough. Can you handle it?”

 

She smiled widely; with tears rolling down from the corner of her cheeks.

 

“For you, I’ll endure everything.”

 

My heart melted.

 

-

 

Days went by smoothly; and I was basking in her love. I didn’t really care about anything else; every day seems like a holiday to me. We spent time together; she would pick me up from my bus stop and would go to college together. We held hands; occasionally stealing kisses from me and one thing I like about Unnie is the way she looks at me.

 

It feels surreal. My heart would beat so rapidly each time she looks into my eyes. Unnie has this tendency to stop whatever she’s doing; holding me closely; her arms around my waist and then her eyes – that soft gentle gaze boring into mine. She would take her time to study my facial expressions; and when she smiles with her two dimples sticking out at both corners of – warmth seeding from the bottom of my heart slowly spreads to my whole body.

 

Gosh, I melted all the time. She didn’t have to utter a single word; just from that gaze alone proves a lot. And I would be convinced that I chose the right person to fall in love.  The right person to pour all my heart to because in that very second our eyes met; I could see forever in her eyes.

 

And she would always have full of surprises for me. One of those wonderful surprises she gave to me was a weekend stay at a cabin up in the mountain. She spent a fortune on this – with the rented car and an overnight stay at the cabin.

 

Oh, I found out. Yongsun unnie comes from a rich family. She has two mothers and a father; her own biological older sister and fraternal twin stepsisters. You often heard how the children of different parents could never get along together and would have ill thoughts of each other, right? But not Yongsun unnie’s family – they love each other to death. Yongsun unnie is the baby of the family. Being the youngest of 4 sisters, Yongsun unnie would get away with almost anything and her older sisters would protect her.

 

I met her sisters – Yonghee unnie, Taeyeon unnie and Hyoyeon unnie. The fraternal twins were a little eccentric, but I clicked well with Hyoyeon unnie. She works as a choreographer and I love to dance. She would invite me to her studio just to do some numbers with her. Taeyeon unnie is a vocalist teacher. She occasionally sings at a pub which me and Hyejin often patronize. She’s an excellent singer. Then Yonghee unnie is the studious; academical smart older sister. She’s the one who taught English to Yongsun unnie.

 

I’m the only child. So, having these ladies in my life because I met Yongsun unnie; I have never been more grateful. Because I’m Yongsun unnie’s girlfriend, they take care of me too. Protecting me just like how they protect their baby sister. And their parents were splendid. Mr Kim is a businessman. Yongsun unnie’s mother works as HR manager in a company and the other Mrs Kim is a professor.

 

“This cabin belongs to Taeyeon unnie’s friend, Tiffany unnie. Well, let’s just safely says that Tiffany is my sister in law.”

 

“Oh, the Unnie from LA?”

 

“Yes, that’s the one. This is their personal hide-out every time they need to get away. Tiffany Unnie enjoys tranquility and Taeyeon Unnie is just eccentric.”

 

“Wow, this place is awesome. They even have a farm behind the cabin.”

 

“Someone looks after this place for Tiffany Unnie. We can pluck those vegetables and cook for our own. They have a small kitchen at the front of the house.”

 

“Yeah, I noticed that. It feels so nice to be here. The air is great and the greenery surrounding us is really calming.”

 

Yongsun unnie smiled widely before she leans in for a kiss.

 

“I’m glad you love this place. Wait here, I’ll grab our things from bonnet.”

 

She left me alone in the cabin; scurried out of the door instantly. I looked around the cabin; it was beautiful, and I felt wonderful being there – and the best of it all, it was just for the two of us. The cabin was just enough for two of us.

 

Then I heard scuffling noises and a couple of groans came along with it. Unnie seems to be struggling with the things so I hurried out of the cabin to assist her. My eyes grew larger when I saw the stuffs she had in her hands.

 

“Unnie? Did you bring the whole art studio into your car?”

 

“I wasn’t too sure what you needed.”

 

She brought an easel, a couple of palettes, paint cans, paint oils and I swear she had everything I needed or even more.

 

“You should have called me.”

 

“Then it wouldn’t be a surprise!”

 

Yongsun unnie is a perfectionist. I swear she’s someone who takes pride in whatever she does. And when she wanted to do something, she expects perfection. Sometimes it could get very stressful for her, but she takes it in her stride and smiles widely even when the going gets tough.

 

One of many reasons why I love her so much. She took pains to get things ready; ensured that I wouldn’t have to worry about anything and having the best of everything right at my own convenience.

 

“I’m so going to paint you tonight.”

 

She immediately looked up; her jaw was wide open. She probably thought I was just teasing her.

 

“You’re kidding, right?”

 

“No, I’m really going to paint you tonight.”

 

“I don’t have the body.”

 

I grinned before moving on the balls of my feet. I leaned forward; pulled her into my embrace; hugging her tightly and once again, she looked at me like as though I was the most precious gem in this world.

“I can even paint you without you being . I have embedded your body into the depths of my thoughts; and I could picture you without clothes even if you’re not here with me.”

 

“ert.”

 

“You cannot blame me, baby. You’re my perfection.”

 

-

 

The night was perfect. We had a sumptuous dinner; she cooked up a storm. Once again, she bought all the ingredients and made the best galbitang ever. Of course, her tteokbokki, you cannot ignore that either.

 

After dinner, we sat on the verandah just outside of the cabin. The sky was brightly lit by the moon’s glow and it was beautified by a million stars grazing across; shining and sparkling so brightly. The peacefulness, the serenity and tranquility of this place made me happy. I was extremely happy that tonight happened. And it was all because of this woman next to me.

 

She was staring up in the sky. I realized, Yongsun unnie has a long neck. Her beautiful long black hair fell nicely upon her shoulders and she was hugging her knees as her eyes sparkled along with the stars above us.

 

My eyes naturally fell on her lips. I wanted to kiss them so badly. I put my arms on the sides of her thighs and leaned forward. She finally looked at me; her eyes were glowing, and her smile was radiating. My heart skipped a thousand beats and I was determined to kiss her good tonight.

 

Our eyes met; again I could see forever in her eyes. That never fades away since the day I made her mine. Then my gaze fell on her lips. And she knew I was about to kiss her. I leaned in; lips almost touched; I let them linger just directly above hers. I could hear her moan softly when our lips finally made contact.  Smooth; luscious and almost addictive – I took my time; nibbling her upper lip; her hands reached out for my neck as she pulled me in; closer.

 

The kiss lasted for a while before I pulled away. Then I grabbed the drawing block and a pencil from the room. She was staring at me. She probably thought I was just pulling her leg earlier on.

 

“You’re seriously going to paint me tonight?”

 

“.”

 

“Okay, .”

 

“Strip baby.”

 

She was taken aback at how straightforward I was. But I wasn’t kidding. I really wanted to paint her .

 

“Is this just for you?”

 

“Of course, only I can feast on your body.”

 

“Wheein, I haven’t really gone in front of anybody.”

 

“Then do it for me.”

 

“I don’t have a nice body.”

 

I smiled before I came closer; pushing her down to the bed and then gently tugged her t-shirt from her shorts. She was still staring at me; biting her lower lip.

 

“Is it okay if I’m the one stripping you ?”

 

“Maybe it’s better that way.”

 

“Lie down.”

 

Slowly; I stripped her to the bare skin. Of course, I ran my fingers gently on her abs; her defined stomach muscles – gosh, it was tantalizing.

 

She’s such a liar. Her body is perfection. Her full s were not that huge yet not too small. They were just right for her size. It took me so much to hold back my desires.

 

“Unnie, you’re still not ready to go skin on skin with me, right?”

 

She shook her head; with guilt on her face. And I was not going to push my way either. I would only do it when she’s ready.

 

“I’m sorry, Wheein.”

 

“No, don’t say that. I love you so much. I’ll definitely take my time with you.”

 

That night, my heart was bursting with so much love.

 

-

 

Throughout our relationship, I have only regretted once. Even at the mere thought of it now would get my blood boil. I have never felt so stupid; so angered with my own self – with my own stupidity.

 

“Whatever. Just leave.”

 

Those were the harshest words I ever heard from Yongsun unnie. That was my very first time to see Unnie’s foul temper; getting extremely pissed with me.

 

And I didn’t attempt to stop her. I was speechless and helpless. And even before I could come to my senses, Unnie was already gone from my sight. We had our first horrible fight. I fought with Unnie over my ex-boyfriend.

 

Yijeong oppa approached me once again after 6 months since our break-up. He lost too much weight and my heart felt a little guilty because it was because of me that he couldn’t concentrate in his final year. But he never once put the blame on me. He said he just wanted to be friends.

 

And I was too eager to patch our broken ties and would love to have him as my friend still. Yijeong Oppa needed my help in his assignments. Maybe because I was soft-hearted; or maybe because I felt guilty or maybe I’m just a nice person per say. I couldn’t say no to him; I couldn’t reject him when he said he needed me to coach him in his final year studies.

 

Of course, I had a talk with Yongsun unnie and she initially relented. She said it was fine by her. The first week went on perfectly fine. I stayed in college after our lectures and spent time; coaching Yijeong Oppa in his assignments. And I didn’t realize that it stretched to almost 3 weeks when Yongsun unnie finally confronted me that afternoon.

 

“Don’t you think it’s weird that he’s spending time with you every single day for almost 3 weeks?”

 

“His final year examinations are just around the corner. He’s panicking.”

 

“But what can you do for him? At the end of the day, he’s the one who gonna sit for the exams not you.”

 

“I promised him, Unnie. And you said you’re okay with this.”

 

“Jung Wheein, I didn’t expect that it will go on for 3 weeks and you’re spending all your afternoons with him instead of me. And when I asked you over, you said you were tired and had to finish your own assignments at home. You basically have no time for me now.”

 

“It has been 3 weeks?”

 

I swear I didn’t realize that.

 

“Yes, and you don’t even realize it huh? Why? Are you enjoying his companionship more now?”

 

She was bursting with jealousy. And I knew she had endured this for far too long. I should have just said something to pacify her, but I insisted to keep my promise with Oppa.

 

“You know that’s not true. I love you, Unnie. How could you say that?”

 

She kept quiet. And honestly, I hated this feeling way too much. But even before I could say something, Unnie just scoffed and stormed off.

 

“Whatever. Just leave.”

 

Those were her final words before she left me standing there, like a fool. My heart ached. And my guilt was tearing me apart. But I didn’t run after her.

 

That was the stupidest thing I could ever done to the woman I love.

 

“Wheein?”

 

Yijeong Oppa appeared in front of me. I didn’t even realize that I have been standing there for the last five minutes. And Yongsun unnie was long gone from sight.

 

“What are you doing?”

 

“Huh? Nothing, what are you doing here?”

 

“We are supposed to study together, remember?”

 

“Oh, right. Let’s go then.”

 

“Wait, Wheein ah. Can we grab a bite first?”

 

I looked at him; then looked at the direction where Yongsun unnie was last seen. Then I glanced down to my watch.

 

“Sure, let’s have a quick one.”

 

We had kimbap and ramen at the nearby restaurant. But I couldn’t concentrate on the person in front of me. He was talking too much and I didn’t want to listen to his voice. I miss Yongsun unnie’s voice. And I really wanted to hear her voice so badly.

 

“Wheein? Are you even listening?”

 

“What is it?”

 

“Is everything okay? You seem distracted.”

 

“I’m just tired.”

 

“Are you having problems with Yongsun?”

 

He knew about me and Yongsun. I was being brutally honest with him on the day I initiated a breakup with him. He was mad; he shouted vulgarities at me, but I took it silently. I was apologetic that I broke his heart, but I couldn’t break Yongsun unnie’s heart further. And he just took off; without saying anything and avoided me for the last 5 months.

 

Only recently when he suggested that I should help him with his studies, I was relieved that he would still want to be my friend. But Hwasa was livid when I told her. She couldn’t believe how naïve I was to believe in him.

 

“I have been spending time with you. It’s taking a toll on her.”

 

“Really? She’s jealous of us?”

 

I didn’t really like the tone of his voice. It sounded like as though he was gloating over it.

 

“Wheein, are you sure you want to spend your lifetime with her?”

 

“What’s wrong with that?”

 

“She’s a woman, Wheein. She cannot give you children. She cannot give you a proper family. And you know our country is not totally liberated on such issues.”

 

“I don’t really care about how society looks at us. We can always migrate to other countries that welcome people like us.”

 

“And you’re willing to leave your family behind? Your friends?”

 

“What are you trying to imply now?”

 

That was when I know how dumb I was. He took out a ring and tried to propose to me. He said mean things about Yongsun; and how her love was superficial because she couldn’t handle the fact that I was helping him with his assignments. And then the bomb came when he claimed that he was doing all this to prove to me that Yongsun’s not the one for me.

 

I was flabbergasted at how shallow this guy could be. He thought he’s a man and he could dictate how my life should be. I was really stupid to believe that he had good intentions but all he wanted was to break me and Yongsun up.

 

I had enough of his .

 

“You’re despicable. Let me tell you something, Park Yijeong. There will never be us; there will never be you and me anymore. You need to wake up and live your life once more because I’m no longer yours. Stop living in my shadow because Park Yijeong-shi, the one I love is Kim Yongsun.

 

Do not ask me why or how or what it is because I myself don’t know what’s going on with me. My heart wants her. My love is only for her. And not seeing her makes me feel powerless. I just had a huge fight with her over you earlier on and I regretted it.

 

I don’t care anymore. I don’t want to be your friend anymore. Whatever happens in your life is no longer my concern. I shouldn’t even be here with you. I should be where she is right now. She’s probably crying over me because I broke her heart.”

 

That broke my heart instantly. Tears immediately filled my eyes. And I wanted to be with Kim Yongsun right now. I took off; without a goodbye. I grabbed my bag and ran out. And I got really scared when I couldn’t get through her phone. It was turned off.

 

“!”

 

I decided to head straight to her place. She was probably mad at me. And I knew I had to set things straight. But I was greeted with silence; with nothing; with no traces of Kim Yongsun.

 

I was panicking. Was this going to be the end of us? The end of our relationship? Because if it is, I didn’t want that to happen. I would go on my knees and beg her to take me back; I would beg for forgiveness – I may look pathetic, but I didn’t care.

 

I couldn’t let her go no matter what. I called her best friend instead.

 

“Wheein?”

 

“Unnie, did Yongsun Unnie call you?”

 

“No, I have been trying to get her the whole afternoon. Her phone was off. She wasn’t with you?”

 

I felt guilty. So, I told her the truth. Moonbyul Unnie was furious at me but I made a promise to her.

 

“Unnie, trust me. I’ll not let her go. I’ll hold on to her. Please let me know the instance she contacts you.”

 

“Fine. I’ll try to look for her. You stay at her place. I’ll update you.”

 

The phone conversation got me even jittery than I was before. I was worried because I couldn’t get hold of my girlfriend. I was desperate enough to find my way to her. I called some of her closest friends but none heard of her. I even called her sisters – all of them haven’t heard from her either.

 

Just then, I heard the door opened and she strolled in; looking calm and peaceful. She was stunned to see me in there though.

 

“Baby?”

 

My heart leapt with joy. She’s home!

 

“Unnie!”

 

I ran up to her; hugged her tightly before I slipped down to the floor; down on my knees. She was taken aback and tried to pull me up, but I remained firm on the floor.

 

“What are you doing?”

 

I literally begged for forgiveness. I kept telling her how sorry I was. How dumb I could get and how I felt for breaking her heart into pieces.

 

“It’s fine. It’s just my jealousy.”

 

“No, it’s not fine. I was stupid.”

 

“I already knew he would do that.”

 

“And you didn’t tell me?”

 

“You were so keen; so adamant to help him. I mean, I was the cause of his heartache. And probably you still care a lot about him. OR love him. I don’t know.”

 

“NO! There’s no way that would happen again.”

 

She was startled at my sudden outburst. I had to tell her. I need to assure her. I needed her to know that I, Jung Wheein, could never live my life without her.

 

“I love you so much, Unnie. I cannot live without you. I’m sorry that I hurt you for the past 3 weeks but baby, please. Can we look past this? I promise. I’ll never contact him again. He’s out of my life and no longer my friend. I don’t care about him anymore.”

 

She didn’t say anything. She just smiled and then pulled me closer.

 

“I don’t really care about him either. As long as you come return to me at the end of the day. I think that’s good enough.”

 

That was the first time I cried like a baby.

 

-

 

Dammit. Dammit. Damn !

 

We went clubbing after our graduation. I was a total hobo when it came to my fashion sense. But not tonight. I wanted to dress to kill. Especially killing my girlfriend. I was at Hwasa’s place; she has plenty of dresses for me to choose.

 

“Okay, what do you want to wear? Or how do you want to look?”

 

“Enough to make Yongsun fall on her knees.”

 

“Woo, I like that. Ambitious. And I have the perfect dress for you.”

 

I loved it. Hwasa loves it. We both love it.

 

“You think Yongsun would want to sleep with me tonight with this dress?”

 

“Hey, are you planning to let her tear this dress up?!”

 

“Can I?”

 

“Refund me after that.”

 

“Deal.”

 

I wanted tonight to be our first special night together. I don’t think I can wait anymore. It has been slightly more than a year and I was getting ually frustrated. Don’t get me wrong. I love Yongsun. But I wanted more than just love and affection.

 

“Get her!”

 

And I had the support of my ert best friend and equally ert girlfriend of hers. But lo and behold, I got the surprise instead. My girlfriend decided to throw me a nasty surprise that really got my adrenalin running too fast.

 

She cut her hair. Up till shoulder length. And she was wearing a blue suit. Her white long tee had lacy curls at the front. She looked exactly like a prince charming. And she was wearing blue sneakers – so Justin Timberlake style.

 

She got my eyes on her. My jaw dropped the moment she got out of the car; with that shoulder length hair and a smirk on her face was throwing me off the course.

 

YOU NEED TO KEEP THIS WOMAN CLOSE TO YOU.

 

Thanks to Yongsun. The woman triggered my green monster and I was even irked when Hyejin was innocently flirting with her. I mean, she did that all the time but tonight, I couldn’t handle it.

 

“She’s beautiful! That’s all!”

 

“She’s mine.”

 

“I know she is. You mean I cannot compliment on her beauty?”

 

“She’s my woman!”

 

Hyejin rolled her eyes at me before turning to my WOMAN.

 

“Good luck, Unnie. You might want to steer away from any woman.”

 

Yes, she should.

 

-

 

The club was filled with women. And all eyes were on my WOMAN. I was protectively and zealously holding on to her arm; glared at any female who had her sights on my WOMAN. I even pushed away one of our closest friends away from her.

 

“Woah! Jung Wheein is TRIGGERED!”

 

“You better stay away from Yongsun unnie or you will get screwed.”

 

“SHE’S MY WOMAN!”

 

“See! That’s Wheein’s mantra for tonight. Don’t even bother to say HI to Yongsun unnie.”

 

Hyejin and Moonbyul unnie were teasing me all night. And Yongsun unnie was helplessly trying to appease me but I stood firm.

 

“Wheein ah, I’m always your woman.”

 

“I know. But I cannot help it! You look so good tonight. So yummy and delicious.”

 

. My s were showing too much. Yongsun unnie was staring at me; slightly flustered but she gave me a smug smirk. I wanted to kiss her dead, but I held back.

 

“Have you been wanting to sleep with me?”

 

I growled.

 

“You bet I do.”

 

“Really? Are you ually frustrated?”

 

“I have always been.”

 

I put my arms around her; protectively wrapping my arms around her. And she never looked elsewhere; her focus was only on me. Just me and only Jung Wheein. To her, I’m always the one for her. I’m the only one she would look at.

 

Once again, I could see forever in her eyes. She’s my forever. Oh, and she’s a . She had just confessed. Silly woman.

 

“Don’t worry. I’ll do you tonight.”

 

Her tomato face resurfaced. And I just leaned in to kiss her. She responded; reciprocated with an inviting bite on my lower lip; urging me to let her in. And I did. She eased the bitten part with her tongue; her hands went around my neck and I just pulled her in closer.

 

Our tongues were exploring each other; and I gently on her lower lip; her eyes were closed and there were some muffled moans; she was trying hard not to get turn on. But it was too late for me.

 

I was TRIGGERED.

 

And I could hear people protesting and Hyejin was screaming “GET A ROOM!”

 

But I didn’t care at all. She didn’t care either.

 

Tonight, I’m getting all the love and I’m giving my all to this woman – Kim Yongsun.