FORMAT AS FOLLOW: Italics - Past | Straight (but really gay) - Present

 

 

If Heejin were awake, she might cry for what was about to happen to her spotless kitchen.

Breaking out two sets of the biggest mortar and pestles, the pair of troublemakers got to work grinding the fruits and vegetables they wanted to use. Hyejoo could have easily carried all the fruits Sooyoung and Jiwoo purchased  - and wouldn’t have sore muscles like her mother - but she slept in. Lost in a dream that she could’ve just woken up earlier to experience in real life.

A real hangout session with a real friend.

Hyejoo and Chaewon had decided to combine their favorite past times: eating and competing. Per Chaewon’s creativity, they were having a smoothie making contest. Whoever made the best smoothie won. They didn’t know what yet but they’d come up with a prize later.

Hyejoo was a bit terrified as she heard more than grinding on the other side of the table, the distinct sound of a knife hitting a cutting board.

Having lived in the woods for quite some time - and a few days per month - she knew what fruits and berries tasted good together.

“Here you go!” Chaewon announced proudly.

Hyejoo looked inside the cup. A murky orange slush sloshed at its sides. She looked over at Chaewon’s preparation table and couldn’t make a meaning of the mess. Was that a vegetable stalk?

She took her cup and handed it to Chaewon who jumped up and down in excitement as if she wasn’t wined and dined at the castle on a daily basis.

She truly was one of a kind.

“What’s in it?” Chaewon salivated at the peach colored mixture. It smelled delicious and Hyejoo looked so proud of her creation.

“Raspberries, bananas, and apples,” Hyejoo giggled as Chaewon’s eyes widened at each fruit she listed. “And mine?”

“Carrots, apples, and ginger!”

Hyejoo really hoped Chaewon meant one ingredient per drink and there were two separate cups hiding behind her back. But with the hope in Chaewon’s eyes, Hyejoo knew she was going to drink it anyway because it would make Chaewon happy.

When did she turn into her mother?

(You know which one.)

“Well you said you like carrot juice, your hairstyle today kind of looks like an apple, and when you’re sick, your mother made you ginger tea. You took sick leave last week so...”

She would’ve sighed at Chaewon’s thoughtfulness if the brownish puree wasn’t in front of her face. Using her best acting, Hyejoo took a sip. The sly glint in Chaewon’s eyes as she downed her delightful drink made Hyejoo feel like she was duped.

“You want a taste?” Hyejoo offered innocently.

“Oh I’m kind of full,” Chaewon clutched her stomach, scrunching her face more than necessary.

Hyejoo did her best pout, channeling her inner Jiwoo. Chaewon froze on sight wanting to make it go away.

When did she turn into her mother?

(You know which one.)

She took a drink of her recreation and grimaced. Her prank had backfired. But Hyejoo cackling so hard she fell into her shoulder was worth it.

---

“You drink your carrots?”

“I wouldn’t eat them so they had to find another way.”

Ten-year-old Chaewon and nine-year-old Hyejoo were sitting at the kids’ table of the party. They hadn’t separated since Jiwoo sent them off and everyone found it sweet. (Except Yeojin who felt like her princess was taken away from her.)

“Yeah, sometimes my mom takes the extra fruit and vegetables she doesn’t sell and makes smoothies for mom and me.”

Jiwoo had turned her little produce stall into a cafe - using her time when she wasn’t busy to make fruit juices. She even found time to make a little wall for her daughter inside one of her fruit crates.

(Sooyoung was only a little jealous. The next week Jiwoo to show that she made a crate wall for her too which sometimes Sooyoung would place in front of Hyejoo’s box whenever the girl threatened to kill her.)

Chaewon admired the way Hyejoo talked about her family.

Unlike some kids she knew - not the ones in the castle as they were as sweet as the Western kingdoms’ delicacy they call cinnamon rolls - Hyejoo never complained about what little she had.

In fact, during dinner, she thought she had too much.

(Hyunjin accepted the extra food.)

Hyejoo was everything she hoped to be and also how she wished all her friends - those now and those she’d end up meeting in the future with all the traveling her moms promised her - would be.

Chaewon wished she could keep her.

---

“Alright, remember this is just a friendly match. Please don’t get too competitive hon,” Jungeun helped secure Jinsol’s chest plate.

“Jungeun, love, I’ll be fine,” Jinsol dusted her fingers over her epee.

It’s been a while since she spared with someone (other than Hyunjin). It was a nice change of pace to be fighting someone that wasn’t a werewolf or a suspected one. The whole kingdom wasn’t waiting for her return with a head on a stake. Instead, it was her friends and family watching and cheering. 

“I just don’t want her to hurt you.”

It would be nice to see what skills Jinsol had learned abroad. Her wife was making the many kingdoms safer and she couldn’t be more proud. Jungeun didn’t know the full details on what she did on these trips nor didn’t she need to. But talk around town was plenty. They were both adults and could handle themselves. Yeojin never stopped talking about her wife’s kills like she was present so Jungeun had a small taste of the justice Jinsol was serving.

It was the same Jinsol that came home, absolved of violence and fear tactics. Hyunjin seemed the same albeit her need to constantly flex her nobility.

If Jinsol was a monster, she wouldn’t have cuddled her last night or this morning or this afternoon.

Right?

---

“They are so frustrating!”

“Uh-huh.”

“And you’re not even listening to me?” Jiwoo huffed, turning away from her girlfriend.

This conversation was not what Sooyoung would consider welcome home friendly but Jiwoo always surprised her. Ever since they met, Sooyoung could never really predict what would happen with the ball of sunshine around. It was a complete one-eighty from her rigorous daily routine she adhered to as a knight.

Even now, sleeping in Jiwoo’s new bedroom in the Jung castle - which of course Sooyoung would be spending her nights in instead of the shared knights’ dormitory outside - Jiwoo and her should’ve been exchanging sweet “I love yous.”

But Jiwoo wanted to complain about their useless friends.

“Why is it our business what Jinsol and Jungeun do? Or don’t do? I’m as frustrated as you are…”

The amount of times Sooyoung had to catch Jungeun from falling off the stairs after seeing Jinsol dressed in their new imported clothes was baffling. Jinsol had recently found the water-themed clothing trend going around the land. Her new piece, a sea green and blue dragon surrounded with waves  on a silk button up, tucked lazily into her dress pants, almost made Jungeun make her attraction known to everyone.

Except Jinsol of course.

“We can’t rush them. They have to figure this out themselves. No one helped us…”

(As if Jungeun didn’t have to force flowers into Sooyoung’s hands to get her to visit Jiwoo’s house.)

“...and look where it got us. I mean, soon we’ll be sleeping in the same room. We’ll be sharing a closet. We’ll be engaged.”

“ENGAGED?!” Jiwoo had completely let go of her worries over her friends to focus on her own life.

Now it was Sooyoung’s turn to face the other direction, hoping she could sleep to get out of this one. But Jiwoo’s excitement behind her said otherwise. Jiwoo returned the embrace.

“You think about marrying me, Sooyoungie?”  Jiwoo blew on the back of Sooyoung's neck.

“N-…..no.”

Sometimes her girlfriend can be frustrating too.

---

Hyejoo and Chaewon were on their third smoothie round.

They completely forgot the competition and were instead making the grossest combinations they could come up with. They straightened up once the doors opened and Haseul and Vivi rushed in with the picnic supplies from their gazebo luncheon.

“Have a good lunch?” Hyejoo asked.

“Of course. Have a good...whatever this is?”

It was like a cannon fired through the kitchen - usually what happened whenever Chaewon decided to cook - but the teachers trusted the girls would clean up after themselves. Getting to know them as teachers and their mothers as friends, Haseul and Vivi noticed the similarities.

Hyejoo had Jiwoo’s smiling laughter and Sooyoung’s boisterous bravery.

Chaewon had Jungeun’s gentleness and Jinsol’s creativity.

What Haseul and Vivi also caught on were similar looks in their eyes when exchanging their glasses of who-knows-what. It was the same glances they were trying to get away from outside. Did Hyejoo even remember she asked them a question? The Ha daughter quickly fell back into laughter with Chaewon like Haseul and Vivi just strolled by.

Those looks.

Hyejoo looked at Chaewon the way Sooyoung and Jinsol looked at their wives.

Chaewon looked at Hyejoo the way Jungeun and Jiwoo looked at theirs.

(If Haseul and Vivi had a mirror, they would see they also mirrored the same joyful expression.)

“You know, your moms will be fighting,” Vivi interjected, wondering if the girls would like some entertainment with their...meals.

“Fighting?” Hyejoo froze. Did Jinsol find out already?

“A fencing bout,” Haseul clarified seeing the look of terror in Hyejoo’s eyes.

Vivi recognized that look too.

It was the same expression Sooyoung had when she was caught in a sticky situation.

---

“And hello to you too,” Vivi grinned as Sooyoung scrambled around the kitchen.

“Quick! Where are the candles? They’re here right?” Sooyoung panted, opening every drawer and cabinet in the room.

Jiwoo had fallen asleep in her arms, fortunately allowing their conversation to remain as awkward as she left it. But she knew that as soon as Jiwoo would wake up, she’d ask again. She was persistent and would demand to get her way.

Snapping out of her thoughts, Sooyoung needed to fix the situation before it got out of hand.

“And what do you need candles for?”

“I’m going to propose to Jiwoo!” Sooyoung blurted like it was everyday sentence.

Vivi grabbed the knight’s frantic hands and got her to look at her, liking how much power she had over so many of the castle residents. She even got Haseul under her spell.

(Maybe Haseul had a weak aura.)

“Sooyoung, are you proposing to Jiwoo because you want to or because you’re scared?”

Sooyoung met Vivi’s eyes, confused at how she was able to get her to calm down so quickly.

What Jiwoo asked scared her. Sooyoung was sure the trajectory of her life was constant. She would become a knight, pay off her parents’ debts, and become better than what the townspeople thought she was: a tailor’s daughter and an exterminator’s prodigy. But somewhere along the way, a girl showed up.

But rather than putting a damper on her plans, she made it better. Sooyoung cried when Jungeun asked her to follow her, knowing her allegiance would make her go. (Jiwoo said she had to or she’d end their relationship.)

How was Jiwoo always so sure?

Any time she went out on missions, Jiwoo was always sure she’d come back.

Even with Sooyoung moving to the Jung castle. Jiwoo knew this would be temporary. A of luck and Jinsol invited Jiwoo as well.

She was always sure and Sooyoung was flailing.

Which is why she had to do this.

She was trained to be brave. And even if her slip of the tongue led her to this, she had never been more sure of anything than of marrying Jiwoo in that instance.

---

“You haven’t fenced in a long time, honey,” Jiwoo reasoned but still tightened the leg strap on Sooyoung’s jacket.

She fit snug into Hyunjin’s outfit with some breathing room. She had to roll up Hyunjin’s sleeves.

(Hyunjin and the rest of the castle residents had gotten wind of the fight and were gathered close to the piste to watch. The seneschal would referee.)

“Don’t worry. It’s like riding a horse. You just gotta get back on it and do it again,” Sooyoung said, twisting her own weapon with her wrist to get comfortable with the hand guard.

It’s been a while since she’s used a real weapon. Hyejoo and her would rough house - or “rough cottage” as Sooyoung would say but with makeshift weapons. Hyejoo was lucky to have fast healing. Sooyoung, not so much.

Jiwoo didn’t know how much wine her wife had -  getting lost in her lovely massage and gossip with Vivi and Jungeun - but who was she to stop her?

Fencing and horse riding were two different categories.

Whenever Sooyoung set her eyes on something - Jiwoo held in a smile as she wanted to say she herself as the best example - Sooyoung stopped at nothing until she got it.

---

“YOU ASKED THEM TO LOOK OVER MY APPLICATION PERSONALLY?”

Sooyoung was livid.

How could they do this to her? She wanted to move up in the world based on merit and skill, not partisanship.

Sunmi buried her head in her hands as she got a deserved scolding. She had used her personal connections to move her daughter’s name up the waiting list for knight training. She was doing what was best for her family.

(Something Sooyoung would end up repeating many times.)

Having designed Yubin and Hyelim’s wedding gowns, she had formed a close friendship with the two, being their point person for clothes and (sometimes their therapist alongside their arranged marriage). Their friendly gatherings were held off once Sooyoung was born but they never forgot the commoner.

Sooyoung stomped around petulantly and hated how small their house was. She couldn’t get any further than her mother.

“I WANT TO DO THIS ON MY OWN!”

“Sooyoung--”

“WHY DON’T YOU BELIEVE IN ME?”

“Who says I don’t believe in you,” Sunmi was right behind her daughter. Not reaching out yet. “I didn’t stop you when you said you wanted to be a knight. When I took you to that roller derby to get that cute girl’s house number…”

Sooyoung turned around scandalized. Sunmi turned her back around to continue her speech.

“I just don’t want you to struggle anymore.”

Realizing they both said the same thing, Sunmi and Sooyoung faced each other in a new understanding.

---

Hyunjin had seen Jinsol fight countless times, having learned a few tricks from the queen first hand. But this Sooyoung was a mystery to her.

She was told the former knight and her wife Jiwoo used to watch over her as a child. Sooyoung had once told her she would like a daughter as brave as her one day. It was near impossible for non-royals to have a child among same gender couples but Sooyoung and Jiwoo prevailed.

She doesn’t remember much about their time here and their brief visit during Chaewon’s tenth birthday party but the queens never said a bad word about them.

That’s not to say for a while Hyunjin was angry at them for being one of the last people to see her parents alive.

But all the adults in the castle advised her to redirect her anger. Vivi recommended taking a break from training. Haseul recommended channeling her emotions in music. Jungeun recommended new hobbies. Jinsol recommended just blaming the werewolves.

Taking a look at Hyejoo settling in next to Chaewon, Hyunjin wondered if Sooyoung got what she wanted.

When one was ‘gifted’ with wolf hypersenses, how could one not be brave?

“Hyunjin!” Jinsol called out behind the mask. “Remember that tournament over in Kwon?” 

Jinsol and her stopped in to watch the tournament with Jinsol whispering to Hyunjin that she could take them. Hyunjin agreed as the queen was highly skilled, having a watery flow to her movements that people weren’t used to. But Jinsol corrected her and said she was talking about the young knight, offering her a motherly smile.

“What about it?”

“The referees spoke in French. Do you remember it?”

Hyunjin had picked up so many skills and dialects, French was long forgotten. She didn’t need it much in the kingdoms she visited.

“Heejin can speak French!” Haseul offered, happy to boast about the young chef.

All heads turned to the head cook who was flattered but nervous, that would mean she would have to stand beside…

“Hyunjin! Have Heejin ref with you,” Yerim volunteered.

Chaewon and Yeojin shared a look knowing Yerim was up to something. Hyejoo, eyes furrowed, felt Chaewon squeeze her hand, nonverbally telling her she’d inform her later. 

(Since when did they develop an unspoken language?)

The cook got up from her spot on the bench, allotting Yeojin more leg room, and stood beside the knight.

---

“What the devil is ‘Miserable Lesbians?’” Yeojin asked.

“Les Miserables!” Heejin huffed and snatched her book away from the nosy girl. 

A new import of books was gifted from the Eastern Kingdom education administrator and the non-royal girls took advantage of something to busy themselves with.

Yeojin couldn’t make sense of the words as there were different marks over the vowels. Thinking it was dust, she tried blowing some off, spit unknowingly getting on Yerim’s face. Vivi and Haseul merely shook their heads as they matched the new arrivals with the inventory list.

“I think there are smudges on this book.”

“It’s French,” Vivi explained, knowing exactly who the book was for. “Those are accents.”

French was an elective at their program which only Heejin opted in. After the attack, Heejin grew wary of leaving the castle. They all did, not wanting to leave unless they were with at least two other people. Unfortunately, Jungeun suffered the most, forever existing within castle walls.

For Heejin, it came with a reality check that those dreams of her traveling were implausible..

(Especially since the one person who she wanted to travel with forgot they were friends.)

So Heejin pretended.

Pretended that those books she read were worlds she lived in.

Pretended that those new languages would be put to good use.

(Pretended that Hyunjin didn’t hate her.)

Vivi and Haseul hoped at least one of those would be true.

---

Sooyoung and Jinsol fitted their face masks on - Jinsol clumsily putting hers upside down until Jungeun got up to help her - and found their footing behind their on guard lines.

They had gained an audience. Hyejoo and Chaewon huddled in one corner on Jinsol’s side. (Sooyoung slightly saddened by this but Jiwoo reminded her - fixing her own backwards chestplate - that they’re just sitting together as friends. When Hyejoo gave a loud “GO MOM!” Sooyoung’s mood perked.) Yerim and Yeojin sat on Sooyoung’s side, evening out numbers. Jungeun and Jiwoo sat smack dab in the middle, respectively on their wives’ sides but supporting both. Haseul and Vivi were behind them in their home kingdoms sides.

That left Hyunjin and Heejin in the middle on the other side of the piste.

“EN GARDE?” Hyunjin checked with Heejin.

Heejin nodded, trying not to get shy around Hyunjin. She was in clear sight of the younger rascals and she was sure with how much time Hyejoo was spending with Chaewon, she would join forces with them.

(Heejin couldn’t hide her smile when Hyunjin fist pumped herself getting one French phrase correct.)

“I don’t know the rest,” Hyunjin admitted.

Jungeun, Vivi, Haseul, and Jinsol - behind her mask - held in a smile. It was a rare occurrence for Hyunjin to get shy. The more Jinsol thought about it, when was the last time Hyunjin spent time with Heejin? Surely she wasn’t giving her too many jobs.

Heejin stood behind Hyunjin to change her hand positions to match her words (effectively hiding her blushing face behind Hyunjin).

“Pret.”

Jinsol snapped back to position.

Sooyoung smiled at another “Go mom!” from Hyejoo.

Heejin snapped Hyunjin’s arms back to her side to signal the first round. Hyunjin wasn’t used to being commanded by someone other than Minho and Jinsol but this felt nice.

“Allez.”

---

Heejin squinted as she tried to finish her novel. She needed to know what happened to the leaf village since Jiraiya’s murder. A door creak pulled her from her reading and she hid the novel underneath her pillow. Vivi has already warned her enough about her eye health. She pinched her eyes closed to make believe she was asleep.

“Hyun?” Yerim called from her bunk.

“Shhhh, sorry did I wake you?” Hyunjin whispered.

“You’re back late again.”

“I know, I know.”

“Did you get muscles?”

Hyunjin flexed as Yerim squinted in the dark. It’s only been a few weeks when she started training but Yerim always remained positive. The older sister couldn’t understand how but she prayed Yerim kept that perspective throughout her life.

“When you’re a knight, you’ll be home more right?” Yerim asked hopefully.

Since their parents’ death, it was like the eldest was in and out of the castle faster than Yerim could blink. They had never seen her so frantic before. When was the last time Hyunjin felt at home?

Heejin did her best to appear she was sleeping, wondering the same question. When was the last time Hyunjin and her exchanged more than decent pleasantries?

Yerim wanted to tell Hyunjin that she would be joining Chaewon in school. Haseul and Vivi would be the new teachers. Heejin and Yeojin would also be in school with them. The sleepy girl wanted to ask her sister if there was a chance her sister would be joining them too.

Didn’t Hyunjin miss them?

Hyunjin kissed her sister’s forehead, brushing back her brown hair.

With the new staff cuts and losses, each order of chivalry was scrambling to meet their quota. It meant recruiting younger and younger people. Hyunjin just met the new age limit, having turned thirteen a few days before Chaewon’s tenth birthday.

She wanted to continue her family’s legacy at first. Coming from generations of nobility, she took it upon herself to be a knight. She wanted the adventures and the traveling and the applause when she rode in on her noble steed.

But her modus operandi had shifted.

She wanted to make sure her sister had a permanent stay at the castle.

She wanted her sister to always remain positive.

She wanted to make those responsible for that fateful night pay.

The traveling and applause were supplemental.

(The one she wanted to travel with anyone - who was sleeping soundly by the steady rise and fall of her back - needed to stay in the castle. It was for her own good.)

“Maybe, little bat, maybe. Now go to sleep.”

---

Sooyoung fought on the attack at first, startling her opponent and then falling back (usually when she realized she overstepped.)

(Very similar to her flirting style.)

Jinsol always retreated until she was sure - more than completely sure - she could come in for the attack. She often crossed the end line by retreating too much.

(Very similar to her flirting style.)

But this Jinsol was not the same Jinsol that Sooyoung fought and trained more than a decade ago. Jinsol lunged on the attack first, getting her first touch in a matter of milliseconds.

This Jinsol’s style was different than before.

Jinsol rarely executed a remise but she had used that strategy for the past three rounds, making Sooyoung exercise parry after parry. This Jinsol was almost unbeatable. Whenever Jinsol scored, she used to give victorious “yeah” behind her mask.

No such sound followed this time.

Was she taking this friendly bout seriously?

Sooyoung was heaving. She did heavy lifting at the woodshop and she hadn’t seriously fought in years but Jinsol was not letting up. Sooyoung didn’t want to think about how unfair it was. Even the other castle dwellers cheered for her to keep her morale.

“You got this Aunt Sooyoung,” Chaewon cheered, hoping Hyejoo wasn’t down because her mom was losing badly.

“Un. Der. Dog. Un. Der. Dog,” Yeojin chanted, getting Yerim to follow her.

“You got this darling,” Jiwoo cheered.

“You got this Mom,” Hyejoo added in. “Crush her like I want to crush you.”

“HYEJOO!”

“Mom, I’m only joking.”

(Jungeun knew she should cheer for her wife but unlike before, Jinsol was winning by a landslide.)

Sooyoung blocked out the sounds to block yet another attack. This Jinsol was different. This Jinsol was on a hunting spree. This Jinsol would do anything for her daughter to be dead.

“Pointe!”

Chaewon cheered quietly.

Hyejoo groaned.

Sooyoung was terrified that this is how Jinsol fought on the front lines.

(So was Jungeun.)

No wonder they had invented a new rank of Knight card for the Queen in front of her.

Jinsol and Sooyoung have yet to have a serious conversation about Sooyoung’s disappearance. 

Jinsol let her thoughts wander as her muscle memory kept her weapon in action. Maybe Sooyoung was bluffing when she said she hasn’t fought in a while. Sooyoung proved herself a well-trained opponent, never backing down once. Jinsol recalled that her and her family stayed in a cottage while recovering so Sooyoung and Jiwoo must’ve done a lot of labor to keep themselves alive.

Jinsol was told Sooyoung’s crest was found outside the Kim castle entrance and they honorably discharged her. Jiwoo’s fruit stand was taken over by distant relatives looking for refuge from their own kingdom after wolves took over their crops.

But unlike Jinsol, Sooyoung didn’t seem to harbor any hatred towards wolves. She had yet to say one bad word against them.

Maybe that’s where Sooyoung got her drive.

Channeling her inner hatred to inspire her to live a better life.

Jinsol found it commendable.

This was good practice for later, realizing this was the longest Jinsol’s been at the castle for a while now. This entire day was heaven sent. She woke up in her wife’s arms, greeted her daughter good morning, had a lovely lunch with old friends...Jinsol was on the brink of realizing where her devotions truly lied until...

A growl echoed in her ears.

And Jinsol felt like she was in the woods again.

And she snapped.

---

“It’s dead! It’s dead! Auntie, stop!”

Hyunjin had to tackle Jinsol to the blood-stained snowy terrain to try to get her to stop. The wolf was already dead by Jinsol’s close range arrow. But that didn’t stop Jinsol from leaping off her horse, landing quite dangerously on her ankles - it would sprain but Jinsol couldn’t feel a thing.

All she could feel was rage inside her body.

It was this vile beast that ended her best knights’ marriage and orphaned their daughters.

Killed some of her closest friends and their daughter and left no evidence of the lives they led.

Almost deprived her of her happy marriage and her own beautiful teenage girl.

Scared her entire kingdom into peril and made them doubt even their sweetest of neighbors.

The reason why her wife’s nightmares were returning and why her beautiful Jungeun couldn’t spend a day without rocking back and forth in fetal position.

Each hack of her knife wasn’t enough to undo the untold damages these monsters have caused to so many.

Blood splattered against her face, a metallic pungency polluting the air, yet Jinsol hacked and hacked and hacked.

---

“HALT! How do you say that in French?”

“It’s still halte.”

“HALTE! Aunt Jinsol enough!” Hyunjin begged, violently shaking her aunt. She had to tear off her mask to get her to look into her eyes.

She couldn’t get like this in front of the castlehold.

In front of her wife.

In front of her daughter.

Sooyoung fell to her knees when the blade sliced through her wrist. Jinsol wasn’t kidding when she said the weapons haven’t been used in a while. From her expertise, it was likely rust or a burr.

It shouldn’t have stung that bad.

But the sheer speed of Jinsol’s flying lunge startled Sooyoung. Hyunjin’s big handed glove cleared a small amount of space on her forearm for the blade to slice through. She was staining the hem of her sleeve with her blood. She would’ve felt a bigger hit if Hyunjin didn’t step in.

(Hyejoo’s nose flared at the copper smell in the air. She could almost taste it. She buried herself into Chaewon’s shoulder to hide, faking that she was worried about her mother.

She was. But not to the extent she was pretending.)

Everyone else was at a standstill.

“She’s bleeding,” Hyunjin said, trying to find Jinsol’s eyes and make them refocus.

“How do you…” Heejin inquired. How could Hyunjin see Sooyoung’s cut from where they were standing? Jinsol had backed her almost to the end line before delivering her final attack from the midline.

“I just know,” Hyunjin took note of Hyejoo’s reaction but directed her attention back to the fencer. “Aunt Jinsol, please.. it’s over, you’re home.”

Jinsol snapped out of her reverie blinking away her blurry vision.

When did she get in the castle?

Why was Sooyoung on the floor?

Were they fencing?

Dropping to her knees - something a queen never does - Jinsol looked at the cut, tearing up at how much she hurt her friend. Reaching out hesitantly she blubbered an apology but wasn’t sure how to begin.

Sorry for almost maiming you in front of our families?

“Hey Jinsol, it’s okay. We just got a little carried away,” Sooyoung consoled, hiding the fear in her own voice.

Vivi swooped in to check the cut (with Haseul following with the first aid kit as if it was the heaviest item in the castle). Yeojin and Yerim went to fetch a water basin and a cloth, recounting some of the best moves they’ve seen - all of them Jinsol’s. Heejin told them to wait for her and followed out, knowing Hyunjin didn’t need her services anymore. Hyunjin was too distracted by her own thoughts to be offended.

Jiwoo joined the older women on the floor, consoling Jinsol that she didn’t do any harm. She diverted to a story about how sometimes Sooyoung would cross the roads recklessly as if lost in her own music. A small cut was nothing compared to almost getting ran over by a carriage.

Jungeun was in a stupor.

Was that her Jinsol in that suit? If the kids had taken up bets - Vivi said no - she would’ve bet on her wife out of respect. Jinsol was classically trained for show. Not for sport. But the performance she witnessed went beyond Jinsol’s training. Jinsol was running on pure instinct. Something one learned if they had multiple dangerous encounters in the wild.

How many times was Jinsol putting herself in danger exactly?

Her daughter was in the same boat.

Luckily, Chaewon had a cute girl burying herself into her neck to keep her from further analyzing the situation.

Her goofy mother did this on duty? If it was anything like the performance she witnessed, Chaewon almost pitied the werewolf that went against her mother.

(Almost.)

---

“You’re making that up! A queen would never do that.”

“Yeah but this queen is special, isn’t she Chaewon?”

Chaewon broke out of her daydreaming to look at the other princes and princesses of her generation. It was Princess Jihyo’s birthday and the birthday girl was busy recycling soju bottles from the guests outside to take part in their “my parent is better than your parent” debate.

They were currently on the topic of Chaewon’s mother and all of her kills.

Not arrests.

Kills.

It was new to Chaewon. The same woman who struggled throwing her in the air when she was a toddler was responsible for the current vendetta against wolves. Chaewon always looked up to her mother for her conviction, stubbornness, and her silliness. She heard the praises of her mother from visitors - and the compliments from her fandom - but wasn’t she feeding into the mass fear of werewolves by taking them out one by one?

No.

She was saving them. Her mom was being a hero.

"But have you seen her actually do that?"

"No but we all know."

Looking at her own personnel - Vivi and Hyunjin, with Vivi fixing Hyunjin’s collar - Chaewon knew that this is what had to be done.

(When asked where her other mother is, Vivi fibbed about Jungeun having her hands full of the new crop taxes. She finished sorting those weeks ago.) 

Her mother was sacrificing her free time so that Chaewon can celebrate all these events with her whole family in due time.

Chaewon had to be thankful.

Her mother was sacrificing her life so she had to be thankful.

She had to be.

---

Yerim squeezed out the remaining water in Hyunjin’s fencing jacket before hanging it out in the courtyard. Around her Heejin and Yeojin were discussing something that was not the fencing battle they witnessed.

As soon as they left the room, they changed the subject immediately, unsure of what they witnessed in there. It was blasphemous to question what the queen was even thinking - even if silently they were all wondering the same thing.

Hyunjin had finished washing her face and calming herself down to see what transpired. She saw her sister and her sister’s friends - not her friends anymore - in the courtyard. She wanted to spend a few minutes observing their antics but Yerim called her over.

She always knew when she was around. Call it a sister-vibe.

“Is everything alright with Auntie Jinsol?”

That was the best wording Yerim could do without sounding like she was insulting the royal family.

“Of course. She simply got caught up in the moment. Teacher Haseul took her to her office to change.”

Hyunjin avoided her sister’s stare but wrongfully landed her eyes on Heejin who looked terrified of her as well. Was her sister afraid of her too?

Yeojin spoke for all them when opening to fill the silence.

“Does she get like that often?”

Hyunjin knew they were also wondering if she herself got like that often. How dare they? Jinsol wasn’t a monster. People only painted her out to be one. There were moments when Jinsol might lose control but Hyunjin always snapped her out of it. Growing up in a loveless family, Jinsol found a true home when she married Jungeun (after she accepted her of course). She probably suffered more than Heejin, Yeojin, and Yerim ever had.

This was how she released all her pain.

But she shouldn’t have shown that side of her to the castlehold. It was tactless and undeserving.

The Jinsol they didn’t witness on a day-to-day basis made sure Hyunjin had more blankets than her when they camped in the woods and the last morsel of food when they dined. A monster wouldn’t have taken a detour during a stakeout to purchase a rapid fire crossbow for her daughter’s birthday and make Hyunjin test it out on her.

“No.”

‘Do you?’ Hyunjin could hear buzzing on the three silent girls’ tongues but they never spoke it aloud, so she left the question unanswered.

---

Hyunjin maneuvered around her ridiculous collar that Vivi tried to salvage to get food into . Seeing that all of the heirs were squeezed into one corner of the dance hall, she wasn’t too worried about Chaewon.

Especially since Chaewon outscored her in archery.

The teenager could handle herself physically. And she could handle the nicknames people were giving her mother.

She felt a tap on her shoulder and before she could tell Vivi that she wasn’t staining the collar, she came face to face with the Park kingdom’s castle guard.

Shin Ryujin.

They had trained together as the Parks lowered the age limit for new knights lower than the Jungs did. Ryujin was a worthy opponent and the two constantly tied in any competition. It was the first time two knights of the south kingdoms were given the top knight honor during their adoubement.

“Did Heejin come along with you?”

Yet another competition Hyunjin found herself in with the guard.

But she had no right to challenge her. Ryujin developed an infatuation when Hyunjin’s bookmark - a sketch of Heejin done by Vivi - fell out during training. Hyunjin had no claim on Heejin nor should she. Heejin could handle herself. Maybe not like Chaewon but the new head cook was her own knight in shining armor.

Heejin wasn’t there. Jungeun’s fear had rubbed off on everyone. Heejin was thankfully safe and sound in the castle with Minho and his guards.

Just because their trip to the Park kingdom went smoothly didn’t mean all trips would.

Hyunjin recalled how the young girl’s eyes glowed when imagining the future trips she would take with her - no, not her, she could take any knight she wanted to - but those dreams were squashed and thrown away.

(Much like the dead wolf carcass Hyunjin avoided with her carriage, telling Vivi and Chaewon to look at the shimmering waters instead as she drove around it.) 

It would be wrong of her to keep Heejin from experiencing the world but every time Heejin turned down a trip, she was relieved.

---

“I am so sorry for my behavior Sooyoung,” Jinsol said for the thousandth time.

Sooyoung picked her up from her knees. A queen shouldn’t be in the position and neither should her best friend. As nerve-racking the afternoon’s events were, Jinsol was still her best friend.

(But she wouldn’t be dueling her any time soon.)

“You stop that now,” Jiwoo scolded. “Just gives more reason for Sooyoung to start training again.”

“HEY!”

Jinsol nodded and turned to her wife who hadn’t said one word to her since the duel. She hoped her return home would be filled with kisses and gratitude but she made a fool of herself.

And of her wife.

It was right for her to be angry at her for embarrassing her in front of her friends.

Jinsol offered Minho or Hyunjin’s services to the family back to their home after dinner but Sooyoung insisted they got it covered. After all, it gave more reason for Hyejoo to develop her knight instinct. Jinsol couldn’t argue, she had to respect their wishes. It was the least she could do after her debacle.

“Hyejoo, come along now, you’ll see Chaewon soon.”

(As an apology, Jinsol expedited Hyejoo’s papers to get her signed up for the next knight training camp starting next week. Hyunjin, antsy to get out of the castle, rode off with the letters before dinner was served.)

Hyejoo and Chaewon watched the awkward goodbyes. They’ve been joined at the hip since Hyejoo set foot in the castle early that afternoon. They gathered with their friends in the courtyard after the duel - running into a frazzled Hyunjin on her way back in - but didn’t speak of the events.

Hyejoo could see Chaewon was disturbed. Chaewon could see Hyejoo was nauseated.

(They were just friends still. Not let-me-spill-out-my-guts-to-you friends yet.)

Hyejoo nodded off and hugged the princess - Chaewon teasing as her breath smelled heavily like ginger - before joining her parents. She had wanted to take the empty crates down with her but no human should have that much energy left after socializing all day. It gave her a reason to return to the castle to retrieve them.

(Not that she already didn’t go to school there.)

Sooyoung offered to piggyback her wife down but Hyejoo took her up on it, carrying her mother with ease.

“Oh just because you’re young, you think you’re stronger!”

The scene made Jungeun and Chaewon laugh and Jinsol’s heart clenched at the sound.

“You couldn’t even score one point, Mom!”

Jiwoo shushed her immediately but they all heard.

Jinsol’s heart clenched a little more as their friends descended down the path. The royals waited until they couldn’t make out the retreating figures before going back in.

Chaewon bolted up the stairs, giving her mothers a quick good night. She had an amazing day with Hyejoo and her friends and she knew how to separate her own problems from everyone else’s. Very important for a future queen.

This conversation between her mothers was long overdue and she did not want to be there when it happened.

Neither did Jungeun or Jinsol.

And definitely not Jiwoo or Sooyoung.

---

Jiwoo wasn’t sure what she’d walk into when she visited the Jung castle kitchen for the first time.

The cabinets were polished. The cooking ware was neatly stacked. The dishes were shining. But Vivi shaking Sooyoung by the shoulders, telling her to “get it together” didn’t quite blend with the picturesque view.

“What’s going on here?” Jiwoo cocked her head to the side, amused as this is the most active she’s ever seen the castle physician.

(And she wasn’t too concerned that her girlfriend was on the receiving end of Vivi’s fury.)

Before Sooyoung could explain what was happening - Vivi was calming her down as she rehearsed her impromptu proposal, spouting out nonsense louder than Jungeun and faster than Haseul - Vivi patted her behind and exited the kitchen. She winked behind Jiwoo as a sign of encouragement towards the flustered knight.

“What’s going on?” Jiwoo smiled, even if she was more confused than ever.

There was no food being prepared or eaten.

No IU or Key or Heejin or Haseul in sight.

So what was a flushed, open-mouthed Sooyoung doing in the kitchen?

“Does this have anything to do about you talking about being engaged?” Jiwoo’s smile unwavering. It was endearing how Sooyoung was in a frenzy over something she started.

The new castle staff member wasn’t going to hold it against Sooyoung. Teasing was a staple in their budding relationship. She didn’t need a piece of paper telling them their love was real.

(Luckily it could be true for two women to have that piece of paper thanks to the new marriage laws being passed for commoners too.)

Jiwoo was prepared to take the woman in her arms and tell her that what they had was great. They were finally living under the same roof - besides the fact that in the Kim kingdom, sometimes Sooyoung snuck Jiwoo into her bunk and vice versa - and they were madly in love. But what she wasn’t ready for was Sooyoung to get down on one knee in the middle of the kitchen.

And Jiwoo was still in the doorway.

“Are you going to propose to me from all the way over there?” If possible, her smile grew even more, hurting her cheeks and wrinkling the skin beside her eyes.

But she couldn’t back away. She practically floated to where Sooyoung was kneeling, each step slow but persistent.

“Darling,” Jiwoo cupped her lover’s rich sun kissed face, not sure what she wanted to soothe.

They both wanted this.

They both were terrified for this.

They both were okay if this was all their relationship was.

Jiwoo had watched a few of Sooyoung’s fencing matches and could see how her fighting style translated to her real life. The seneschal second guessed herself and backed out of dangerous missions. And as she saw Sooyoung’s beautiful brown eyes dilate in fear, fear she created for herself, she could feel her retreating.

It held the seneschal back from rising the top quickly but it kept her safe.

(And Jiwoo and the gang would agree that they benefited from it too.)

“I don’t have a ring.”

Even with the sun rising behind the tree tops, Jiwoo was glowing. A joy Sooyoung longed for since moving to the Jung castle. And now that it was back in her life, she was afraid it would be taken away from her again.

Sooyoung partially wishing she was a royal so this could’ve been pre-organized for her. But Jiwoo deserved something from the heart.

Her heart.

If she’d have her.

“I don’t need a ring.”

Sooyoung was terrified to the core - even her kidneys were pounding - thankful she was already on her knees as they buckled beneath her.

Feeling the same apprehension she had when she submitted her name for knight submission.

The same feeling she had when Jungeun was found missing in the castle.

The few hours Jiwoo was here was mostly spent in her - really their - bedroom, but it created a brighter world for the young knight. Better than her crest could provide. Better than the luxuries the Jung kingdom could provide.

“I don’t deserve you, Jiwoo.”

If she ever came home with an injury or a defeat, Jiwoo would always be there to make the loss seem normal. And if Jiwoo wasn’t ready, weirdly enough, Sooyoung would know Jiwoo would pick up the pieces after rejecting her.

“You completely do, Sooyoung.”

Sooyoung leaned into Jiwoo’s touch before launching into her hastily-made proposal:

“Kim Jiwoo…”

Jiwoo was going to say yes no matter how messy Sooyoung’s speech would be. It could be a thousand words or just two but she let Sooyoung have the floor.

“You deserve better than this proposal, my love. You deserve trinkets and happiness and reasons to laugh. You deserve someone to wake up to and shower you with love and affection. You deserve peaceful nights and festive days. You deserve more than a seneschal’s salary can provide. In all honesty, I believe you can do better than me. But-”

Jiwoo Sooyoung’s cheek. That was a struggle in their relationships: taking risks. Sooyoung took all of them on the battlefield and left none for her romantic life.

“I also know that you don’t believe you do. Because for some reason, you believe I bring you as much joy as you bring me.”

“You do.” 

Being out of your element came with the armor. The vulnerability that came with knighthood was physical - a dented helmet, an unfastened saddle, a rusted sword. The vulnerability of dating Jiwoo was harder to see - a promise to return home, a hasty transfer, another suitor in line. A contract wasn’t signed between Jiwoo and her but her loyalty to Jiwoo was as strong as her loyalty to the throne.

“And I would like to continue bringing you joy and happiness for the rest of your life.”

Loving Jiwoo was the biggest risk. Sooyoung didn’t know how to prepare for it. There was no manual, no training, no experienced knights she could shadow. It’s why she hesitated asking Jiwoo out. There was no strategies list that made her think it would blow in her favor.

‘That hesitancy is going to hurt you,’ Jiwoo would always warn.

Jiwoo couldn’t stop the smile - has it even gone away since stepping into the room - filling her face. Unlike Sooyoung’s thespian self, Jiwoo was confident in their relationship. She was anxious whenever Sooyoung left and even if there was no guarantee of Sooyoung’s return, she knew the love was there. After all, why did every day without Sooyoung make her feel like she was only dust in outer space.

After all, what knight’s first stop was a lowly shack on the outskirts of the village? It was usually a brothel, bar, or a combination of the two.

Sooyoung’s bravado made her realize it late but Jiwoo always thought they were practically married since their first kiss. 

(And she would’ve popped the question much earlier if it wasn’t for Sooyoung’s hesitancy.)

“Will you give me the honor of being your wife?” Sooyoung breathed out, unsure where the air in the room went.

Jiwoo was right. The hesitancy would hurt her. Well, it hurt the back of her head as Jiwoo knocked her to the floor, happily accepting the proposal, and kissing her silly.

---

The youngest Jung kept her door partially open to listen in on her mothers coming up the stairs. If completely shut, she wouldn’t be able to listen to the sounds of her mothers coming up the stairs.

Hopefully they would be giggling with delight like they were this morning, when they went down to fetch wine at announcement of Sooyoung and Jiwoo visiting.

Hopefully hearing Jungeun’s loud screams of delight as Jinsol chases her up the stairs. The flurry of Jungeun’s gowns creating a gust of wind that can be felt throughout the castle. The echo of Jinsol’s stomps shaking the estate to the ground.

She got this instead:

The clacking of her mother’s shoes stiffly made its way down the corridor.

A door opened.

A door slammed.

Chaewon counted down. 

Any time now, Mom. Any time now.

She made it to twenty with no other set of footsteps following and the princess threw herself on her bed, groaning as her abdomen curled around something hard. That always happened when she flopped onto her stack of Kirbys, their beady eyes doing more harm than good.

Hugging her wolf close, she wished she could take her birthday wishes back.

Even if she got a really cool crossbow (one that still hasn’t been returned, her mother forgetting about it due to all going on around the kingdom) and Hyejoo to return (one she would never return), she should have never wished for her mothers’ reunion.

Hearing their laughter ringing these last couple of days, echoing louder than Haseul’s voice and Yeojin’s cackles, made Chaewon fall for the castle’s acoustics, hearing her mother’s homecoming finally making Jungeun act like her old self.

She silenced her cries as another scuttle made its way up the stairs.

Then down the hall.

“Jungeun...I…”

A light knocking.

A creak.

“Jungeun...can I come in...please?”

Chivalry.

Even without her knight persona, Jinsol always had it. Chaewon prayed Jungeun would let her in. That she would forgive her. That she would tell her today was an anomaly and Jinsol was the same fun-loving goofball they’ve come to know and love.

(Chaewon wasn’t sure if she was trying to convince her mother or herself).

They always slept together whenever Jinsol was home. Even when the other was sick, they’d build a pillow wall between them, reaching between the crevices to hold hands, cursing all the diseases that existed for making them sleep apart.

The three Jungs would cry themselves to sleep that night.

Chaewon in her bedroom.

Jungeun in Jinsol and her’s.

Jinsol in her office.

---

“Jung Jinsol, I’ve been waiting for this day!”

Her opponent lunged at her in slow motion but that’s how Jinsol always viewed her wife. When she disembarked from the carriage on the day of their first meeting, Jinsol thought the Kim kingdom could control time.

Her wife, her actual wife that she now slept in the same bed with, slowly lunged at her which Jinsol deflected with a flying punch.

But to make sure she didn’t hit her wife (WIFE!) she controlled her motion in slow motion.

It had been days since they first shared a room and every day was bliss in the Jung castle. They didn’t shy away from their loving exchanges or glances - Jungeun still blushed whenever Jinsol stared for too long. It felt like nothing and no one could do no wrong.

They had entered the honeymoon stage.

It only took seven months.

Jungeun played along and leaned back, waving her arms theatrically and laughing as Jinsol clearly missed. Not that she wanted to hit Jungeun. She could never hurt her.

“YOU’RE DODGING?!” 

“AHAHA!”

“That was a good evil laugh, sweetheart!” Jinsol dropped her evil killer facade.

“JINSOL!” Jungeun flushed, wondering if there would ever be a day when she wouldn’t feel her heart race at Jinsol calling her any term of endearment. Why did it take her so long to accept Jinsol?

“Oh right,” Jinsol picked up her fighting stance and proceeded with a (slow motion) uppercut which she gave just enough time for Jungeun to swerve away from.

Followed by a good evil laugh.

---

Jinsol placed the weapons back in their cases before stowing them away.

For a few months they would stay there. Locked and safe.

Collapsing onto her chair, she took a look at her office. Once her mother’s, Jinsol had made it more lively. Two aquariums - Jungeun’s “I’m sorry it took so long to fall in love with you” gift - lined the walls. Behind her, a large bookcase with books and scrolls dating centuries ago. A sliding ladder to reach the higher shelves was tucked neatly away in the corner.

In front of her, three large windows that once opened to a balcony looked over the courtyard behind the castle. Now one had to be careful not to stand too close to an open window or they’d fall out.

(Jinsol would’ve spent money to make the area safer but all her missions abroad pushed the renovations on the backburner.)

In the center, two large couches and a chaise for her guests.

Jungeun and Chaewon were free to visit any time they wanted. She didn’t want to make her mother’s mistake of pretending they were a happier family than what they presented.

(Which is why she kept her special research in her bottom drawer where she knew they wouldn’t touch. They respected privacy.)

She recalled her mother Jessica sleeping in this office - among other things - and she promised besides her stubbornness and assertiveness, she wouldn’t take after her.

She would never cheat on Jungeun.

But she had hurt her which was just as distasteful.

And she would camp on the couch like her adulteress parents, working on the best apology her wife deserved.

---

A twenty-year-old Jinsol slammed her head against the back of her carriage.

She would take it up on her mothers for why she left so hastily when she returned.

Couldn’t they install something to make the wheels go faster? Or the horses gallop faster? Or time to just stop?

It had been ten hours since the princess was announced missing in her kingdom so who knows how long she’d actually been gone. And that’s only how long it took the guard to notice.

Once she found Jinsol’s castle guard, she would challenge her to a duel for letting the princess go.

She knew Jungeun and her weren’t off to a good start. Sure, she pushed it by telling too many jokes, too many puns, too many Doraemon impressions but she didn’t think she scared the girl off. Arranged marriages were outdated and contrived but the council was big on tradition. It was only her mothers’ generation that started allowing for same royal couples.

She wondered how many generations later it would take to abolish the tradition altogether.

Startled by the howl in the distance, Jinsol huddled closer into her cloak, hoping the Kim princess was safe.

Jinsol wasn’t sure how to reason her surprise visit.

‘She was worried about her? She cared for her? She’s sorry for pushing her past her breaking point? She’s a lousy fiance?’

Too much, Jinsol. That would scare her off again.

If anything happened to Jungeun, Jinsol would only have herself to blame.

 

 

NEXT CHAPTER UPDATE: NEXT NEW MOON

Q (ourtuneisohigh): Our couples going strong except my favorite because I live for the drama. To research for this chapter, I watched some of my favorite loona tvs (plus a gowon tv). Thanks for all the support and letting us know your thoughts in the comments and the dms. It's getting cold and dry so stay hydrated everyone. Twitter | CC

N (LazyNinja on ao3): Chuuves backstory was so cute. Vivi shaking Sooyoung to calm down is a mood. Hyunjin and Heejin interaction after 84 years was nice. How long until Lipsoul make up ya think? Got any ideas for upcoming chapters, let us know. ~ Twitter | CC