FORMAT AS FOLLOW: Italics - Past | Straight (but really gay) - Present

 

 

White light.

Bright, white light.

Yeojin thought she entered the afterlife tunnel the wrong way as the whiteness was funneling up instead of away from her. Ready to shout for a redo at death, all that came out was a dry croak. She couldn’t scream as something was restricting her voice as well.

A definite redo was in order.

Yeojin would also like to review her last moments as the last thing she remembered was Chaewon commanding her to run and a sharp, burning sensation across her back before darkness took over.

Even in death, she could feel five scratches across her backside, the first slice at the back of her neck, the second, third, and forth equally spaced downwards, and the fifth one right above her last spinal rod thing. (She didn’t pay much attention in Vivi’s anatomy classes to know the actual term.) Trying to scratch at the deepest searing itch, the one on her neck, she frowned as her hand thumped against a hollowed surface.

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you,” a calm but stern voice sang out.

“I-i-is this the Good Place or the Bad Place?” Yeojin gulped.

“Neither,” the same voice laughed.

Someone else huffed in exasperation.

“So the Medium Place?”

“She’s clearly not sedated enough,” the exasperated voice said.

“Yeojin, you’re not dead!” the stern voice replied.

“Aunt Vivi? Haseul?”

Haseul, who hasn’t left her sister’s side since Vivi announced that Hyunjin and her had found their runaway castle residents, shook her head. She imagined their reunion to be bittersweet but she couldn’t see eye-to-eye with her sister due to the colossal white cone Vivi fixed on Yeojin’s head.

(Also, Yeojin calling Vivi - who was only a few months older than Haseul - her aunt still rubbed Haseul the wrong way. But when Yeojin called her “sister-in-law” after the physician and musician married, Haseul wasn’t sure she liked that moniker as well.)

“That cone is to prevent you from scratching at your bandages which you kept doing as you regained consciousness after...whatever happened to you.” Vivi returned to her charting, knowing Haseul was eyeing her warily.

Yesterday morning, Vivi and Hyunjin said they found Yeojin and Chaewon in the tunnel leading to the retired Jung spa. Hyunjin effectively scared off a beast that tried to kidnap Yeojin. They didn’t offer much detail as Chaewon and Yeojin collapsed from exhaustion from whatever journey they had outside the castle walls.

“Do you remember anything that happened before you out, Yeojin?”

Despite the cone, Haseul could see Yeojin tensing up. Haseul didn’t want her sister to feel pressured to admit her foolish - but maybe justifiable - decision to leave the castle the eve of a full moon. When she was ready, she’d listen.

(Haseul and Vivi hoped Jinsol and Jungeun were adhering to the same parenting tactics with Chaewon, who was recovering in her own bedroom.)

“We don’t have to talk about what Chaewon and you did before,” Haseul gently took Yeojin’s hands in hers, waiting for as long as it took.

“I don’t remember much…”

(Vivi gave a small victory to herself.)

Haseul nodded sadly but patted Yeojin’s hands, telling her that she understood.

“Doctor Vivi says you and Chaewon were walking in the pool tunnel and you two didn’t see that you were being followed by a creature. Did you see anything odd? Sense anything? Animals aren’t usually smart enough to keep stealthy.”

The cone shook left to right.

The Bang siblings wanted to guess it was a wolf but they didn’t want to think Yeojin would be that close to the brink of death.

(Even if Yeojin banked that she would end up in The Good Place.)

Haseul waited to see if any other memory returned but surprisingly Yeojin wasn’t in a talkative mood. Just when she thought she knew her kid sister, she did something out of the ordinary. Whatever happened must’ve drained her sister’s usual bright energy. Humming their mother’s favorite songs, Haseul watched the cone lull side to side as Yeojin fell into a much deserved rest. 

Keeping her eyes trained on her sister, she pretended not to notice Vivi rummaging through her medic bag, hiding her desepration that an item that wasn’t there - and should’ve never been there - had gone missing.

---

“Beetlejuice! Beetlejuice! Beetlejuice!”

“Bloody Mary! Bloody Mary! Bloody Mary!”

“Toyboat! Toyboat! Toyboat!”

“How did you say that three times fast?” Chaewon questioned Heejin in awe.

The three youngest remaining castle residents - Hyunjin and Yerim were visiting their parents’ graves for their death anniversary for the day - stared at the small dead animal before them. With most of the staff on furlough (i.e. fired) and relocated (i.e. displaced) after the Great Wolf Attack, Yeojin was now the youngest castle resident.

(As if they didn’t already baby her enough.)

Creating a slingshot with measly items they borrowed (i.e. stole) from the castle, the three were practicing their aim at small trinkets in the castle garden as the sun started to set. 

(Trinkets that would be melted down and sold to boost the security budget anyway.)

But Yeojin may need to get her vision checked again as she hit something that made an ungodly screech as it fell off one of the garden’s water fountains, staining the water red. Yeojin might need to get her heart rate checked as well as she was sure she killed an animal that was dear to Yerim.

Every animal was dear to the girl but this was one of the last and only living remembrance of Yerim and Hyunjin’s mother. After slaughtering their parents’ horses for food, Yerim only had this precious life left. Barely three years into its life, Yeojin shot it dead.

Terrified of the consequences of her actions - not that Yerim could kill her, she could barely hurt a fly (her big sister Hyunjin on the other hand) - Yeojin thought the next best move was a resurrection. But lacking in surgery skills - new teacher Vivi refused to teach such a thing - forbidden magic was the next step.

Hearing campfire tales of mystical lands behind the illegal magic, the three girls spouted nonsense, using buzzwords they’d heard from around the kingdom.

“None of these are working.”

“Okay. Who do we know that comes from a magical family?” Yeojin pondered.

“Not me. I’m pretty normal,” Heejin sighed.

“Besides my royal blood, overwhelming wealth and beauty, me too,” Chaewon said.

“And I think my sister and I are normal,” Yeojin answered her own question, an itchy feeling that she could be wrong creeping into her skull.

“You’re really not,” the queen-to-be teased.

“ANYWAYS!” Yeojin stretched her arms to slap a hand on both of their mouths to shut them up but Chaewon and Heejin effectively dodged her. Which they wished the bat bleeding out in front of them did too. “Yerim and Hyunjin have got to be normal too. Except maybe Hyunjin.”

Heejin pretended not to be affected by the insult. Hyunjin was just closed off and kept to herself.

But as Yeojin ran through the list of remaining castle residents, they remembered someone nearby possessed the skills to resurrect the bat.

Before the newly appointed castle cook could object to ransacking Aunt Vivi’s room - which was her room as well - Chaewon and Yeojin were already off towards the first floor sleeping quarters.

---

The blonde knight did a full one-eighty as she marched up and down the third floor corridor. Eyes focused and posture erect, she wasn’t going to let anything get in and out of her daughter’s bedroom as she recovered.

“Shouldn’t you be more concerned about creatures trying to get our daughter through her bedroom windows?” Jungeun prodded.

The knight faltered as Jungeun stood at the end of the hallway, arms crossed, eyebrow raised.

“No, because we got rid of all the trellises and all except one balcony years ago. Plus, I have the castle walls smoothed and spackled for any footholds every year,” Jinsol recited, letting her guard down.

But not enough as Jungeun glided over to her pacing wife, trying to get her full attention.

The last two days had been a nightmare for both of them. She wasn’t even sure if Jinsol had slept a wink since coming home. She wasn’t sure if she did either. Cutting her mission short as soon as the knight duo found their missing castle horse, Jinsol was unfortunately stuck in knight-mode. 

Vivi had just finished cleaning the grime off of a sleeping Chaewon when Jinsol bursted through the castle doors.

(With Sooyoung stumbling in shortly after, huffing and doubling over in exhaustion.)

“I know you’re mad,” Jungeun started.

“AND YOU’RE NOT?!” Jinsol interrupted.

Jungeun waited for her wife to cool off. “The most important thing is that Chaewon’s home safe.”

“What was she even doing out there, Jungeun?” What happened to make her think she could go out there? AND ON A FULL MOON AT THAT?!”

Jungeun tried to mask her wince as Jinsol raised her voice. It wasn’t directed at her but she felt its fury. It was rightfully placed and she appreciated Jinsol not allowing it to bury itself in her body.

Blinking away her frustration, Jinsol saw through it. A stranger wouldn’t have but in their years of friendship, courtship, and marriage, it was obvious. Like all of the signs she pretended didn’t exist there. That Jungeun didn’t want to be there. That Vivi spent years researching and making it palatable. Sooyoung told her on their short journey that honesty was the best policy.

Jinsol promised to be better. They both did.

When Chaewon was gone, was Jungeun as scared as she was? How did she express it? Who was there to hold her through it? Not her.

“Jungeun,” Jinsol reached out slowly to hold her wife’s trembling hands. “You’re shaking.”

“Hopefully not another bad trait I passed down to Chaewon. Like us both running away,” Jungeun scoffed but closed abruptly. This wasn’t Haseul or Jiwoo or Vivi or Sooyoung she was self-deprecating in front of.

This was Jinsol.

Who was shaking her head in disbelief at what was coming out of Jungeun’s mouth.

Last year - it had been that long - Jinsol broke down and Jungeun held her through it, willingly silencing her own problems to show progress.

Now it was Jungeun’s turn.

“Jinsol.”

A gulp.

“Jinsol, sweetheart, look at me.”

When Jinsol did, Jungeun fought the urge to run away. Like they both did all these years. Physically for Jinsol and emotionally for Jungeun. 

“It’s time we talked.”

---

“The price of these books are ludicrous. Can’t we find an alum and buy off of them?” Onew slammed his head onto their wobbly wooden table, almost toppling over all their dishware.

Consisting of: Three plates. Three bowls. Three spoons. Three mugs.

Luna and Onew were hurrying their discussion about Jiwoo’s education. She could be home from running their market stall at any minute. The key to raising Jiwoo was to expect she would pop in when you least expect it.

At the age of seven, Jiwoo had become an impressionable salesperson. And while it was endearing, she shouldn’t have had to work at such a young age.She had barely finished elementary when the kingdom famine made Jiwoo choose - her parents begged her not to - to follow her family tradition as a fruit farmer. Scraping all they had from the summer plows, Jiwoo’s parents were a couple hundred shillings short of one full year of school.

If she skipped another year, Jiwoo would almost be the same age as the teachers.

They dared not touch Sera’s Academy in the Kim castle as they’d have to sell their entire cottage for one semester there. It would be nice for Jiwoo to get to know the princess but rumor has it, her private lessons were singled out to keep her safe.

“I’M HOME!”

Onew managed to sweep the little money they had into his lap as their bright-eyed girl stomped in, pockets jingling with today’s sales.

“And what did you bring us for dinner dear?”

Luna scowled in her husband’s direction, hoping he’d figure out a better smalltalk segue than their basic needs.

“Did you have fun today?” Luna corrected.

“Of course,” Jiwoo strained, trying not to groan at the numbing pain on her back.

Pain a teenager shouldn’t have.

“I learned something interesting today,” Jiwoo sang. “It’s the talk of the town.”

Luna and Onew swallowed at the word “learned.” It wasn’t formal education but anything Jiwoo picked up was good for her. Each tidbit she learned off the streets would get her closer to a job that she could hopefully choose for herself.

“Princess Jungeun is marrying the Jung kingdom heir! Isn’t that exciting?”

Maybe they could sell their dining table. Nothing wrong with eating on the floor or in bed.

“I wonder if it’ll be a big wedding…”

As Jiwoo rambled on and on about the royal wedding, they wondered when their little one would be able to talk about her own future with as much enthusiasm.

---

“I know what you’re doing and no.”

Sooyoung sulked as she plopped onto a bar stool. Jiwoo was busying herself with breakfast. A full breakfast as (almost) everyone was home safe and sound as of yesterday. (Hyejoo had one more day in the tunnel.) Yeojin was in and out of consciousness and the third floor had been quiet since Jinsol and Sooyoung rode in.

Which could mean Chaewon was still asleep.

Or the Jungs were committing to their parenting tactics of silent-treatment-but-pretend-everything’s-alright.

“But I want to help,” Sooyoung pouted.

Jiwoo almost gave in but turned her head sharply towards the oven. “No, you should be resting. You just came back from a mission.”

“I WAS BARELY OUT FOR A DAY!”

“SHHHHH! The kids are sleeping.”

Sooyoung knew Jiwoo meant their child Hyejoo - Yerim and Hyunjin were training in the stables - who lazed around more than her human form during the cycle. She’d be back, voraciously eating at the table by dawn tomorrow.

(A meal Sooyoung would be helping her wife prepare, she put her word on it.)

“You know, being a chef was my job?”

(And it will be her job again when Hyunjin’s ready to take her place.)

Being whiny when bored was unquestionably a trait Sooyoung passed down to Hyejoo.

“I know. But now it’s my job. A job we all share in this castlehold,” Jiwoo huffed. “But more importantly, it’s also my choice to cook today’s meal.”

Sooyoung tilted her head, sensing that she struck a nerve. Waiting until Jiwoo walked her way after emptying the wooden pail of danishes onto the serving plate, Sooyoung reached out to her.

“Jiwoo, did I offend you? Because I am sorry.”

(Take notes, Jungeun and Jinsol.)

Jiwoo softened at her wife’s pleading eyes, looping her arms around her neck as Sooyoung did the same around her waist.

“The past few days have been a lot. Now knowing that Hyejoo can choose to be a good wolf, something we already knew about her...it just reminds me of my past.”

Sooyoung nodded. Jiwoo and her were cut from the same cloth and pursued futures that weren’t in the cards for them. It calmed them that Hyejoo, who thought she’d be trapped in a ravenous wolf state for eternity, would have the same choice.

“I am sorry for bringing that up for you.”

Jiwoo shook her head and kissed Sooyoung’s worries away.

“Okay, you work here and I’ll deliver Hyejoo’s morning meal,” Sooyoung kissed Jiwoo’s pout before it could form. Having Hyejoo transform at home made them want to see her more often. “Let’s hope this time it’ll be better and she won’t growl at me to get out.”

“She doesn’t do that with me,” Jiwoo giggled against her wife’s lips.

“Tell me about it.”

---

“Are they back, Yerim?”

Jinsol and Sooyoung - well Sooyoung pretended, knowing Yerim’s capabilities - were surprised Yerim heard them come in. If she was in the castle, an ordinary human shouldn’t have heard them ride up. Tied to Sooyoung’s horse, McQueen neighed as Yerim welcomed them all - humans and horses - with open arms.

“Yes, Hyunjin and Aunt Vivi found them unconscious in the pool tunnel.”

The two knights watched as the handmaiden expertly checked on the horses’ conditions. Was she checking their pulses and temperatures?

“What were they doing in the pool tunnel?”

Sooyoung didn’t have to hide her surprise as she had no idea. But it did point to one glaring fact: Chaewon and Yeojin planned their escape and return if they knew the pool tunnel was a viable option. If they were only out for joyride, they would’ve come up to the gates like they did to alert others of their presence.

“No idea Aunt Jinsol. But at least they’re back!” 

(A sneaky look between Sooyoung and Yerim let Sooyoung know Hyejoo’s identity wasn’t compromised because of the runaways’ actions.)

“I’m just glad McQueen’s okay. Now I don’t have to beat up Yeojin.” Yerim smiled while giving the horse in question an affectionate hug.

Jinsol had trouble hiding her surprise there. Yerim could barely swat a mosquito, cutting out the inner squares on all their fly swatters when she was a kid.

“And Hyejoo?”

“Hyejoo?” Sooyoung repeated.

“Your daughter?” Jinsol led them walking their horses to the stables, wondering if Sooyoung was suffering from lack of sleep. When Jinsol woke up, Sooyoung was stoking the fire. The Head Knight found it rude to walk away and rest properly when a queen - and her best friend - had fallen asleep against her shoulder.

“She’s still sick,” Yerim chimed in, nodding at Sooyoung to work on her acting.

“Right, my poor, poor daughter,” Sooyoung pounded at her chest, wiping away a stray tear.

Okay, too much acting.

Sensing that Jinsol and Sooyoung were more than antsy to go back to their respective wives and daughters, Yerim volunteered to take the horses back and put their gear away. She had a lot to tell the horses about recent developments in their wolf history.

“Should I announce you’re back?”

“No, that’s alright. We’ll have our entrance speak for themselves,” Jinsol bowed her thanks to Yerim.

“Race you,” Sooyoung grinned before dashing off.

“No fair! Your legs are longer!”

“Cute, aren’t they?” Yerim commented as Jinsol and Sooyoung raced up to the castle, shoving each other out of the way to get inside first even if the exterior double doors could fit them both.

Since she was more trained, Jinsol slammed the door in an exhausted Sooyoung’s face.

“Okay fine!” Sooyoung made her way to the kitchen entrance. “But my wife’s hotter, Jinsol!”

The horses nodded at the display and Yerim smiled, happy to have them back.

(But she was kind of serious about her threat towards Yeojin, knowing her strength and temperament was more than capable of carrying it out now.)

---

The postmaster wasn’t used to handing mail to Seneschal Hyunjin. She was barely home and there were whisperings about her state of mind since the Kim kingdom’s attack. But a headless body with a cone for a head floating down the foyer scared him off to make any smalltalk.

It didn’t help that Yeojin was in all white garments, hiding her feet and making her look like she was floating.

“Yeojin, you scared off Postmaster Malone.”

“But getting the mail is my job!”

Hyunjin shook her head. Yeojin was in no state to do anything. One could only hope Chaewon was wearing the same cone concoction and maybe Hyunjin could trick them into a wrestling match for her entertainment.

Any distraction would help right now.

Each day felt harder to get out of bed than the last.

“Come on!” Hyunjin winced as the cone only amplified Yeojin’s voice. “I have to do something.”

“Then go find the book Aunt Vivi says is missing.” Hyunjin knew Yeojin was incapable of doing that but no one liked letting Vivi down.

(Vivi was very distraught about her missing book at breakfast.)

Compartmentalizing the mail between her fingers, Hyunjin huffed as the Jung pile grew bigger and bigger. More treaties to sign, bills to pass, greetings to acknowledge. But what did startle her was that Vivi's pile was growing too.

Besides the few usual letters from her mothers - an Alchemist and Doctor like herself - catalogs of new medical developments, and a few house call requests, the castle physician rarely received correspondence. But this envelope came from a bureau Hyunjin only knew of as a statistical department to help the Dispatch Council know of the citizens’ whereabouts.

The Census Bureau

Those were the people in charge of keeping track of every citizen’s gender, birthplace, career, income, blood type, education status, birthday, and more.

What would Vivi need that information for?

Hyunjin’s thinking spree distracted her enough for all the precariously balanced parcels to fall from her grip. Some of the scrolls and envelopes opening up of their own accord. 

“Should’ve had me do it,” Yeojin bullied.

“Should I get Yerim?” Hyunjin exasperated.

“No. Please don’t.”

Yeojin remembered that Yerim might have a grudge on Chaewon and her for taking McQueen out during a moon cycle. 

Gathering the mail, Hyunjin’s eyes widened as she saw the first few words of a letter addressed to the Jung queen. The stamp above it notarized the terrible words on the announcement.

“No way.”

“What? I want to see,” Yeojin jumped to see if she could dislodge from the cone to take a peek.

Wanting to place the mail over the cone to muffle the squire, Hyunjin let Yeojin read the disturbing news herself. She couldn’t say these words out loud with Yerim probably nearby.

Angling the paper down delicately, Hyunjin made sure the words were right in front of Yeojin.

Cross-eyed but determined, Yeojin almost fell over with the news, thankful Hyunjin was there to support her. She’d never be able to announce something like this.

(Why break Yerim’s heart even more.)

Queen Jung Jinsol, we congratulate you on slaughtering the werewolf of the year. Evidence surmounts that you slayed an ancient wolf, one of the root causes of our unrest. We found the entrails of your victory scattered along the Shin kingdom shore…

---

If undoing violence was part of a queen’s job, Chaewon was remarkable at it.

While Yeojin ripped through Vivi’s collection of texts, Chaewon made sure to place the items back in the way they found it.

(She had a lot of experience as she often went through her mothers’ things.)

“What about Vicks?” Heejin scratched her head, thumbing through one of Vivi’s medicine catalogs. “My parents say Vicks works for everything.”

“Which parents?” 

“All of them,” Heejin wasn’t used to Haseul and Vivi as her parents. One day she’d be comfortable to call them her mothers. But not yet.

Especially since they were going through one of her mother’s things.

Now there was a plethora of “lineages” - adoptive should count - Heejin could follow the line of. But she was bent on being a chef like her birth mother.

“Oooh look, Aunt Vivi’s diary.”

“You mean sister-in-law Vivi,” Chaewon corrected.

“Yeah, that’s weird,” Yeojin grimaced and flipped through. “Wait, I can’t read anything in this but our names. Wow, she mentions Haseul a lot.”

Throwing it behind her, Yeojin didn’t see Chaewon and Heejin diving to catch it.

Switching two books that Yeojin put back wrong, Chaewon’s eyes caught a worn-down moleskin book that was pushed up against the back of the bookshelf walls. Taking the rest of the books out, Chaewon yanked out the oddly placed object, having been pressed against the back wall for who knows how long.

Causing the princess to fly backwards onto Vivi and Heejin’s bed.

Heejin and Yeojin went to check on the princess and sitting on either side of her on the bed, they looked at what Chaewon found.

A wide tree was carved beautifully on the cover, with faded words in a language neither girls knew. It sure looked different than the language Vivi wrote her diary in. From the dust accumulating in the creases and the lack of smudges on the pages, Aunt Vivi barely touched the book as well. She didn’t write it and she didn’t read it. But she kept it.

“I haven’t read this one yet,” Heejin awed, wondering what kind of knowledge she could draw from it.

With how the bed bounced with the other two girls shaking, Heejin knew the curiosity was shared. 

---

Compared to the rowdy citizens, difficult decisions, wolf simulations and actual wolf killings, this stress the queen was under was unbearable.

She shouldn’t feel any type of guilt as it was Jungeun who underwent the actual stresses she was vividly describing. When they first got together, Jinsol was an audience to Jungeun’s earlier attacks. She’d wake up to a drenched, hyperventilating Jungeun. Come downstairs to Jungeun rocking back and forth in a dark room. Walk into Jungeun pounding on her own head to make it stop.

Each one harder to bear than the last.

For Jinsol to witness and for Jungeun to experience.

So when they started getting better and less frequent, they celebrated. The birth of Chaewon and raising her seemed to do the trick.

Until Chaewon’s tenth.

Unsure she could go through it a second time and unsure if Jungeun could as well, Jinsol took it upon herself to stop the root causes of these attacks at the source: the wolves themselves.

But even with the number of wolves dwindling - or not, Jinsol would have to consult the Census Bureau for accurate statistics - Jungeun didn’t get any better. Jinsol was in denial her attacks were still happening, extending her trips abroad to keep herself from watching her wife lose herself.

If it was hard for Jinsol to listen to, how much more difficult for Jungeun to feel it.

Sitting on opposite walls of the hallway, Jungeun talked and Jinsol willingly listened.

“I should’ve been there,” Jinsol thumped her head back against Chaewon’s door.

“Jinsol…” Jungeun stammered, back against the opposite wall, the only thing joining her to her wife was their feet stretched out before them. She inhaled sharply, making a face at the tears running down her own face. “You only half mean that… You know you hate seeing me like this.”

“I know but,” Jinsol pressed the soles of their feet together. She wanted to be closer but knowing Jungeun needed this space so she could properly express herself. “I just… it shouldn’t be hard for me. It’s not me going through it. It’s you. I shouldn’t have left you to deal with it alone.”

Marriage was a gimmick. Especially a Royal marriage like theirs. It was a gimmick Jinsol and Jungeun didn’t believe they’d take seriously. Yet with great gimmicks came great planning and understanding. They were wives on paper but with the way they couldn’t meet eyes without tearing up, they were wives in each other’s hearts.

“My love, you don’t have to bear the weight of my problems.”

Jinsol’s head shot up and her heart cried out at how distraught Jungeun looked. Her hair was sticking to her teary face. Her lips and eyes swollen. Did that mean all those long years of searching for a cure were for naught?

“What kind of wife would I be if I didn’t?”

Jungeun knew Jinsol meant well. Jungeun often asked knights and the council to make sure Jinsol took the safest missions possible.

They were too selfless.

“Not my wife.”

Which made them selfish.

Caught up in this, their own daughter tried to run away from them. There were things worth salvaging. 

“Would you have wanted a different one?”

Maybe one that stayed home more. One that did a better job looking out for her.

One that Jungeun chose herself

“No.”

Even through revealing her darkest parts, Jinsol looked at Jungeun like all of the stars were in her eyes. Even if some of her actions were regrettable, she did it for them. For her.

“No?” Jinsol cocked her head to the side and Jungeun fought everything in her to reach out to her. She needed to get as much of her side of the story out as she can before rewarding herself with Jinsol’s warmth.

For their family.

“Even through all this, I wouldn’t have you any other way.”

---

Jiwoo itched at her formal blouse digging into her skin. She had to make a good impression as she bowed before the woman who could help decide her fate. The house was littered with plants, which Jiwoo was sure were gifts to appease the famed woman.

Maybe she should’ve stolen a plant on the way up here.

The home was otherworldly in its decor to the young farmer. Items she’d never seen before lined the walls or tables. So many knick knacks and jarred items of significance caught her eye before trails of smoke drew her eyes to the small bubbling cauldron and pipe in the owners wrinkled hand. 

She was a household name. She was a miracle worker. She was also a heavy smoker.

Holding her breath, Jiwoo greeted her.

“You come in wonderment and doubt. Let me guess: Someone to impress? A test you need to take? A journey you need to go on?” The old lady croaked, taking another hit from her pipe.

“None of them,” Jiwoo shook her head.

She was a single non-student who couldn’t afford to travel.

“Then what is it you seek?” The lady put her pipe down to cough out a puff of smoke.

Jiwoo waited until her coughing fit ended before speaking again. “I was wondering about my future.”

“Is it not a future full of love, knowledge, or adventure?”

The farmer shook her head vigorously, squirming as her shirt dug further into her skin. She knew this woman was asking for specifics but even those she couldn’t fill in. While the village teenagers gossiped about the royal wedding and they paraded in their muddy aprons to manifest their own marriages, Jiwoo couldn’t join in on the fun. The nine-to-fives in the fields and the market stalls was all Jiwoo knew in life.

“I don’t know about all that.. But I do know I like girls,” Jiwoo bobbed her head up and down, hoping it would be of some help.

She should’ve definitely brought a plant.

Or maybe a fat pig.

Madame Zeroni chuckled, picking up a different pipe, entertained by the innocence of the girl before her. 

---

Placing the dishes out on drying racks, Haseul ducked as Jiwoo aimed for her head. She knew this was Jiwoo’s new official job but she wanted to help. Trudging back to the bar stools, Haseul sat down and watched Jiwoo work.

There weren't many dishes to wash as none of the Jungs had come down for lunch.

Also, Vivi was on a rampage and she wasn’t ready to be in the middle of that.

“What do you think about starting school?”

“I’m a little too old for that, don’t you think?”

“Nonsense. If I remember correctly, when Sooyoung became a knight, she helped send her grandmother back to school.”

Jiwoo fought the smile on her face. When they began dating, it was one of the stories Sooyoung shared that got Jiwoo to fall for her.

(Not that she wasn’t already.)

Toweling off the utensils, Haseul shook her head at Jiwoo’s trip down memory lane. But then remembered when any mention of Vivi had her smiling like a fool in the same regard.

“Well we’re almost two months into the year and the kids are getting antsy. I saw Yerim trying to lift a horse the other day. I knew she missed them but wow.”

Even if Yerim wasn’t her child, Jiwoo mentally scheduled a lecture towards the young handmaiden this afternoon.

“I just think it would take the pressure off of them after Heejin’s…”

The clanging of spoons filled in the rest of the sentence.

As an observer to the many changes happening in and out of the castle, Haseul needed a sense of normalcy. Even with Yeojin safe and sound, Haseul wasn’t sure if the same kid returned from her journey outside. She had never seen her sister so excited to do chores around the castle.

Even ones that weren’t originally assigned to her.

Maybe it was boredom or irritation to the fixture around her head but Haseul could feel Yeojin changing as well.

“I mean you could teach too. Like agriculture or self-defense. If I remember correctly, you flipped Sooyoung when you first met.”

Hoping the trick of getting Jiwoo to daydream about Sooyoung would work a second time, Haseul frowned as Jiwoo gave her a look of distaste.

Jiwoo was excited to learn of Haseul and Vivi sharing a room over the past few hours. Albeit, a comatose Yeojin was in the room. Maybe the two could air out their grievances. But here the court musician was, clinging onto a schedule that may not work for them anymore. An empty desk marking Heejin’s absence could set any of them off.

Also, Haseul should be having this discussion with her co-teacher, not her.

“I know you want things to go back to the way it was, I get it, I do. But sometimes change is good.”

Haseul gulped as she warily eyed one of the kitchen cabinets behind Jiwoo’s head.

A cabinet that hid a book with the faded engravings of a tree on it.

---

Vivi threw another dirt-soiled rag into the bucket before picking up a clean one.

It was easier to navigate on Chaewon’s bed now that the Kirby dolls were locked away in her dresser. Vivi knew it had to do with a certain resident’s revulsion towards them.

Wiping down Chaewon’s arms, Vivi reached under her sleeve to see if any dirt crawled under there. She would leave the actual undressing, knowing they’d have to wash the stained bed sheets as well, to Chaewon’s parents.

“You made the first full moon of this year very exciting Chaewon,” Vivi had to remind herself that Chaewon wouldn’t respond.

(Barely a few weeks reading that damned book and she was already losing it.)

But Vivi did want to ask what compelled Chaewon to leave and take Yeojin with her. Or maybe it was the other way around and it was Yeojin wanting the rush with Chaewon as her companion. Either way, Vivi knew every member in the castle was coming up with their own theories.

When a scroll fell out from Chaewon’s sleeve, Vivi shook off the dirt on it, accidentally unscrolling it. Dusting it off and fighting the urge to read its contents, Vivi’s eyes zoomed in on the signatures on the bottom of the page.

Signatures unfamiliar to her but ones she knew Chaewon would know.

Looking over its contents, Vivi picked up a few buzzwords, each more heartbreaking than the last. Words Jinsol and Jungeun wished Chaewon would never hear unless it was her conscious choice to say them. After rinsing out the rags, Vivi made sure to return this to Jinsol’s office.

“Chaewon…”

This time Vivi couldn’t fight herself from voicing her thoughts aloud. She wasn’t controlled by forbidden magic yet.

“What have you done?”

---

Yerim wasn’t actually mad at Yeojin but with everyone swimming in their own dilemmas  - the usually cheery Jiwoo slammed her dishes down during breakfast, cracking three of them - Yerim could feel all the emotions rubbing off on her.

While her athletic body was molding, her emotions were going haywire.

How did Hyunjin and Hyejoo have such good control over them?

(They don’t.)

While she put animals and humans on the same level of importance, her best friends running away took a toll on her. At the mention of them being missing, her blood pressure skyrocketed and her heart practically beat from her chest.

She was lucky to be away from curious eyes as this happened.

“On a scale of one to ten, how would you rate your pain?”

“What?” Yerim asked incredulously at the conehead sitting across from her in the lounge.

“I don’t know, Aunt Vivi says it a lot and you sound like you’re in pain, Yerim.”

Maybe her guess was right years ago when she thought Haseul and Yeojin weren’t human. How could Yeojin sense that without being in close proximity to her? Without seeing her?

“Well, you haven’t talked to me all day so maybe you’re in emotional pain towards me. That’s a thing, you know.”

Whatever enlightenment Yeojin found in her trip abroad, Yerim thanked the source.

Yerim was in pain.

She hated the emptiness she felt when finding out one of her favorite horses was gone. She hated the betrayal of two people she grew up with and told (mostly) everything to leave without a trace. She hated the numbness of uselessness as her best friends lay comatose - what good was being a nonhuman if you couldn’t do anything extraordinary to heal them.

“I just didn’t like seeing all three of you hurt.”

“Three?” Silence for a few seconds as Yerim waited patiently. “Oh right, McQueen.”

Hearing Yerim’s giggle echo  in her cone made Yeojin feel better. Even if she now knew what was bothering Yerim, Yeojin wondered what she could do to make it up to her.

Maybe once the cone was off, she could buy her something nice. But she didn’t want to keep borrowing from Chaewon or Haseul. Year after year, she spent her allowance for knight school only to be rejected. As she had to refine her daily schedule to fit her physical impairment, Yeojin thought about how to apply this week’s lesson to her life.

This cone was doing wonders to Yeojin’s self-reflection, the castlehold would agree.

---

“Did we get the new shipment of books already?”

Being a schoolteacher was new to Haseul but she was sure they had all their supplies for the fall and winter quarter. Fortunate to have the gift - or as others would say, favoritism - of brand new supplies, they donated last year’s curriculum to other schools in the kingdom.

Vivi shook her head but kept her eyes towards the three girls on her bed, perusing a book she knew Haseul had never seen before.

A book she kept around but didn’t wish for a long occasion to open.

“It’s a family heirloom.”

“Oh?” Haseul was intrigued as she leaned on the opposite door post, almost missing the concrete and flying backwards if it wasn’t for Vivi catching her arm.

Vivi rarely talked about her family. Unlike Haseul and Yeojin who didn’t know their family history other than their dad’s side - all their mom told them was fairytales with unnamed protagonists - Vivi knew everything five generations back.

She just chose not to speak of it.

“It’s not from the good side of my family.”

“I…” Haseul cleared . “I didn’t know you came from a bad side.”

“I didn’t. Well, not my immediate family. But some of my distant relatives, we...they...they had to resort to some things that cost them their morality.”

(Her great cousin Kalabar was uninvited to all family parties.)

Haseul and Vivi looked into the room, thankful the girls were immersed in reading.

“That book. It contains rituals to perform the strongest magic known to our kind.”

Haseul had never heard Vivi sound so small until now. Even after such a debilitating blow to the kingdom, Vivi had kept her head held high and made sure everyone was taken care of.

“But all those spells come with a price. For example, the resurrection spell,” Vivi lowered her voice. “You can’t bring back a life unless you take one of equal value. I’ve never seen it performed but I heard even the life you bring back isn’t the same as the one lost.”

Vivi’s pupils dilated as she remembered the stories she heard. Except these weren’t stories like ones of goblins and sirens that the Bang family heard. These were historical anecdotes of her own people.

She winced as something touched her forearm and looked up to see Haseul looking at her with a softness she couldn’t describe.

(In her diary, she’d always fail to find the words to describe anything Haseul did.)

“I’m glad you never had to use that book. It wouldn’t be like you.”

Before Vivi could retort that Haseul couldn’t prove that, Haseul stormed in and ripped the book out of the childrens’ hands. The book was a reminder of a life Vivi didn’t want and Haseul wanted that temptation out of her life.

“HEEJIN SAID WE COULD WE READ IT!”

“I DID NOT!”

“YOU CAN’T PUNISH ME! I’M A PRINCESS!”

---

Vivi kept her composure as the world around her went dark.

She succumbed to the air being out from around her, swirling around the pyre she built.

One advantage of living in a castle is that most rooms were unused unless they served a purpose. Even with the renovations after the attack, one would find two-thirds of the castle empty because everyone kept to their respective spaces. Which is why the ballroom - the only remaining of the four ballrooms that once decorated the home - was the perfect room to perform this ritual.

A collection of books lay under a familiar folded pink apron - courtesy of Queen Seohyun sending back Heejin’s things. A thin ring of fire encircled the belongings, growing steadily as Vivi continued her incantation.

But reciting only by memory. Her heirloom book had been missing since this morning. Or was it last night?

Whoever the culprit, she would blame them for this spell going wrong.

In order for one to perform forbidden magic, there was a cost of equal value of the thing that is coveted. It came in forms of sentimental objects, rare plants, animal lives, human lives. But Vivi didn’t need another life yet. Her requested census information of everyone born on her daughter’s birth year was due to arrive any day now.

First, she needed to find Heejin. In order to do so, some of Heejin’s belongings must perish.

She was sure her beloved daughter would understand when she got her back home. Vivi had watched Heejin’s parents die on her very bed, just days after each other, for an illness she couldn’t label. The guilt that followed transformed into her protection and love for their daughter.

Who was now her daughter.

Who was the friendliest and cherished girl in the kingdom.

Vivi recalled the fateful conversation in the kitchen that led Heejin to request a transfer. She was the one that inspired Heejin to leave. She was the one at fault for putting Heejin in a position to be attacked.

She couldn’t help Jungeun heal. She couldn’t help Hyunjin and Yerim develop their skills. She couldn’t guide Hyejoo. She couldn’t keep Yeojin and Chaewon out of danger. She couldn’t even make the woman she loved make her feel like she was wanted.

But this one she could fix.

Heejin’s body, in whatever condition, could still be salvaged.

Above her a dark blue cube formed, cackling and hissing sparks that would have scared the doctor days ago. If she performed this correctly, the cube would pinpoint Heejin’s location whether she was dead or alive.

She only hoped Heejin wasn’t scared as an identical cube would be whizzing above her as well. This was for her own good.

Little regard to her own health, one flaming speck landed on Vivi’s cheek. She merely brushed it off, knowing she could apply a balm to it later, focusing her energy on the ceremony. As the fire grew closer it singed the strings of Jieun’s gift to Heejin before she passed, Vivi fumbled the rhyme scheme as she remembered teaching Heejin how to bake a simple sourdough in this outfit. 

Vivi dropped to her knees, extinguishing the flame with her hands as she embraced the apron tightly against herself.

The blue cube blackened.

The fire grew dim.

The items were saved.

But Vivi’s principles were forever scarred.

---

Jiwoo patted her empty pockets as she turned the street. Her parents would be worried sick, no doubt, about her but she lost the money.

She couldn’t remember where she placed the hefty payment from the queens after delivering food for the princess’ engagement party. It was hard to keep track of money when she was helping the princess escape. She didn’t have a plan - she never needed one - but the previous day in Jungeun’s company was the best adventure she’s had in her lifetime.

The grim reality of how they would actually survive crept up in Jiwoo’s mind. She knew one language and couldn’t even read it. Whereas the princess knew a handful but had never been in situations to utilize it. They didn’t scour the lands due to lack of free time or in Jungeun’s case, it wasn’t princess behavior.

Trapped by their own limitations, the wolf attack scared them back to the present.

She would still be a farmer the next day.

Jungeun would still be engaged.

From how the princess described her fiancee, Jiwoo thought that maybe Jungeun’s upbringing was vastly different from hers. She knew riches and comfort made one’s perspective in life differently but the traits Jungeun described her future wife with weren’t ones Jiwoo would find unattractive.

(“She just wants to make me happy. And she keeps asking for my opinion. And she takes notes when I talk. Actual notes on paper.”)

Not that she had a chance with any princess anyway.

Maybe a knight.

Like that charming knight she met again in the Kim corridors.

But Jiwoo would save that thought for another knight - Jiwoo shook her head - night. Night. She meant night.

Not that she had a chance with any of them either.

Jiwoo was on the road of mediocrity and she wouldn’t dare drag anyone down with her.

---

The five didn’t think they’d gather until after the full moon cycle ended but Hyejoo deserved to know. The entire kingdom would’ve heard the news by now.

“Think it might’ve been Tao?” Hyunjin asked.

Hyunjin could hear and smell Hyejoo behind her. (There should be an invention to neuter wolf breath.) Hyunjin sat in the tunnel while Hyejoo lay sprawled out on the platform beside it. Sooyoung and Jiwoo sat across from them on the other side, fawning over Yerim trying to rub Hyejoo’s belly, Hyejoo fending her off with her legs.

(The married couple tried to do that when Hyejoo was a kid and a swift kick to Sooyoung’s nose was all they needed to know.)

(They were also feeling residual forgiveness from Sooyoung bringing up Jiwoo’s past. While Jiwoo dealt with it, Sooyoung kept her distance and busied herself around the castle.)

“Tao was the wolf that was in the tunnel?” Sooyoung relied on their testimonies, having been out in the woods during their meeting.

She was with Jinsol the entire time and they didn’t come close to finding a wolf. Let alone, an ancient one. The details the council used to describe this wolf’s murder, she couldn’t imagine Jinsol doing such a thing. Limbs strewn over the beach. Skull smashed in. Whatever of whoever murdered him did it when he was in his human form, making it seem like an ordinary murder.

If one could call it that.

Dental work matched his canines to that of a wolf. The fur clothing he wore was linked to other cases where more experienced wolves used fur-infused attire to shift from wolf to human form easily. This made the murder more victorious as killing an older werewolf would stop one cycle of werewolf breeding. (They all wondered if the council knew about that fact.)

But Tao had promised that over the years, he stopped converting humans.

A fact the council didn’t know. They didn’t even know his name. They would bet the council would have his skull cleaned, brandished, and encased in one of their many ballrooms as a trophy.

“He didn’t deserve that,” Yerim sniffled.

“I know,” Hyunjin reached around for Yerim’s hand but hit Hyejoo in the process.

The hybrid grumbled.

“What if he compromised Hyejoo’s location?” Sooyoung shot up, almost hitting her head on the curved concrete.

“If he did, they would’ve been here by now,” Jiwoo reasoned, unsure who she was trying to convince.

Who or what killed Tao had to have been stronger or as equally strong as him. Whether it was a strong pack of newborns or the brethren who banished him, they were all threats to Hyejoo and the Jung castlehold.

“I’ll ask my old boss if I can get some silver and I’ll recoat some of the bars around the castle,” Sooyoung looked over to one of the tunnel gates, hand running over the material. “Maybe the furthest filtration gates too.”

“I’ll take a look at any cracks in the castle walls that could provide an easy jump into our home,” Hyunjin finished.

Sooyoung and Hyunjin high-fived. Jiwoo and Yerim softened at the two knights’ newfound partnership. The third knight in the tunnel rolled her eyes, knowing she couldn’t contribute with her language barrier.

That gratifying moment of communicating with Tao was short-lived but she’d cherish it for years to come. Granting Hyejoo her privacy, the four set off to prepare this evening’s meal.

(Not without Yerim sneaking in another belly rub and Hyejoo punting her. Hyunjin was fast to catch her airborne sister before she knocked herself out on the arched ceiling.)

“Aunt Jinsol was trying to change too,” Hyunjin sighed, referring to how this only bolstered or tarnished the queen’s reputation (depending on how you envisioned her).

“You don’t think Aunt Jungeun would believe this right?” Yerim asked.

Jiwoo and Sooyoung shared a look, squinting as their eyes didn’t adjust to the dim lighting like the lycans leading the way. The Jung queens were a conundrum but a few baseless rumors would never ruin their relationship.

“Chaewon might.”

---

Jinsol couldn’t pronounce more than half of these words so how could she be sure these were safe to ingest? Or apply topically? Or smoke? Or whatever route of entry.

Screaming into her hands, she allowed herself to feel true desperation before continuing on her work.

The queen was quite proud of herself. This was one of her first endeavors the council knew nothing about. They even had a (nosy) hand in her courting of the Kim princess but that was to uphold their reputation. In hindsight, their raw love story did the council more favors than they wanted. Jinsol and Jungeun were paraded around as a success story that arranged marriages worked.

(As if Jinsol and Jungeun didn’t spend months in separate bedrooms trying to figure out their feelings without the interference of others.)

Jinsol had keen hearing in the woods but in the castle, she tried to turn that side of her off. Which is why she didn’t hear the knocks on her office door until they were loud bangs.

“Come in!”

Hurrying to sweep her files into her secret drawer, Jinsol cursed as one page flew out of her folder and in front of her guest.

“W-wh-where did you get this?” Vivi lifted the paper off the ground, unsure if she wanted to throw it into Jinsol’s office fireplace or hand it to her students to ball up and use it as ammo.

(Most likely at her head.)

Jinsol closed her drawer slowly, realizing her months of hard work had been discovered. But it’s not like she was making progress. Every piece of knowledge she picked up was detrimental to her career and to her own mental health. What more if this knowledge was actually applied.

“Jinsol, I asked where you got this.” Vivi never sounded scarier than she did right now.

Jinsol wanted her chair to swallow her up, knowing Vivi of all people would figure this out faster than anybody just by looking at one page of research.

“A few doctors, mind you, trained doctors like yourself, from around the lands-”

“Jinsol, are these even tested? Did these go to trial?”

“Not yet but-”

“‘NOT YET?!”

“Please, Vivi, keep your voice down, Jungeun could-”

“I HOPE SHE DOES HEAR ME BECAUSE THIS IS ABOUT HER!”

It would be like Vivi to take Jungeun’s side, having grown up next to her for part of her life as a student of the Kim kingdom’s former physician, then later as Jungeun’s own doctor. She was baffled at each word on the page. She kept up-to-date with the advancements in medicine and technology to better her practice but these remedies Jinsol were looking at were definitely not approved for mass consumption.

“Sertraline, Paroxetine, Imipramine, Citalopram,” Vivi read out, punching each word with venom that seeped into Jinsol’s mind. “These aren’t available in regular markets, Your Highness.”

Growing angry at the accusation she was getting at, Jinsol stood up abruptly, toppling her chair backwards. “You don’t think I don’t know that? I’m not going to ask Jungeun to use something that is untested for my benefit. Or the market’s benefit. Or medical research’s benefit. I just want to know when there is a cure ready so she doesn’t have to live like this anymore!”

Heaving, Jinsol braced herself on the desk, admitting this for the first time aloud.

Her missions were always longer than a regular knight because she had added another mission.

Find the cure for Jungeun so she can live a normal life.

If there was such a thing as normal for royals.

Taking pity on the queen, Vivi noticed the dark circles under Jinsol’s eyes. Her frail arms looked like they’d fall off. Did she eat a meal today? In front of her wasn’t a money hungry pharmacist or a capitalist entrepreneur. It was a desperate wife doing desperate things for a desperate situation.

“I know that she’s having attacks again. And nightmares. When I sneak home late at night, I see Chaewon or Haseul or you trying to calm her down in our room so I camp out here,” Jinsol gestured to her office space. “Until the next morning. She won’t tell me they’re happening but I know.”

Jinsol fought the tears from coming, the queen busied herself by picking up her chair. Vivi handed the loose piece of paper back to her but Jinsol shied away from it, letting it float to the table.

The physician hugged her cardigan close to her. She knew Jinsol wouldn’t force feed these experiments to Jungeun but what she was doing was unhealthy. If she kept searching for a cure, she’d always see Jungeun’s condition as a defect.

---

Fighting a cold draft wafting through the castle - it was like something up all the heat - Jungeun was cuddled into Jinsol’s side, both of them pressed against Chaewon’s door.

Listening for any sounds of her awakening, the two believed Chaewon would confess her reasons for leaving - and hopefully a better explanation than Yeojin - when she was ready. 

Hopefully she didn’t inherit procrastination from either of them.

Their first mistake during their first talk last month was airing one issue out longer than necessary, thinking it was enough to patch up all that was lost between them. So to Jinsol’s reluctance -

(“This conversation is about you Jungeun. I had my turn last time.”

“No, that didn’t work, remember? This conversation is about us.”)

-they let their regrets and admonishments around Jungeun’s condition digest where it was and moved on.

Real progress this time.

Jinsol hung her head. The years she spent searching far and wide and over and under for a miracle did her no favors. There were too many side effects, not enough trial periods, ingredients that weren’t “Vivi-approved.” If the ever-so secretive Hyunjin wasn’t her partner, she would’ve been discovered by now. Another knight would’ve ratted her to Jungeun, to Chaewon, or to the Council.

“I wasted so much time,” Jinsol felt the tears forming and knocked her head back to stop them.

Jungeun was supposed to have the floor. She had her time.

Shaking her head, Jungeun placed her hand in-between Jinsol’s head and the door to cease her pity party. When she recalled her first attack after Jinsol’s knighting, she didn’t think how easily it would flow from her lips.

(“I thought to myself: What a shame. Your wife is out there fighting for the common good and I’m here hyperventilating at my own reflection.”)

Each story vivid like she lived through them yesterday.

(“It was like everything was too loud. Too fast. The world was against me.”)

When one symptom disappeared, it was like another one replaced it.

(“I couldn’t tell if I was getting better or worse. At least the nausea I could hide in our citizens’ presence.")

And what surprised her was she didn’t beautify it either.

(“I sweated right through my clothes, Jinsol. I thought Haseul would have to hold me down to get me to stop convulsing.”)

An indicator that she was supposed to tell the love of her life this all along. That these secrets were their own misgivings. So it was no surprise Jinsol had more secrets to reveal.

The wolf killings and the panic attacks were prologues.

This time, they’d listen to the whole story.

“And what else?” Jinsol whispered against her hair.

“Are you sure you want to hear the rest?” Jungeun wasn’t sure she had much more to give. Any person would’ve steered away from her after hearing the details of her condition.

 “I do,” Jinsol pulled at her ears, a playful representation that she was ready to listen.

No matter how much Jungeun would tell her today and the days after.

“Now those words are awfully familiar,” Jungeun laughed heartily, a decades old weight dissipating off her shoulders, back, and even her heart.

Bringing Jinsol down for a kiss - Jinsol steadying herself on Jungeun’s thigh - they welcomed this better version of themselves.

---

“What did you think of the play?”

“Kind of an interesting plot.”

“How so?”

The two women were walking back from a traveling playing company’s show, Knight Sooyoung following close enough to protect them but enough to be out of earshot. Jungeun grimaced uncomfortably at the mistletoe-soaked vest she was wearing, the unusual smell warding off people wanting to sit in the rows around them.

(A royal should be sitting in their own section of the theatre anyway. Not that Jungeun appreciated that arbitrary segregation.)

Jiwoo would’ve had one too but she wasn’t priority protection.

(Not that Sooyoung tried to sneak an extra vest on-the-go, even offering her own when Jiwoo politely declined.)

“Well, the main character, I think Koo Sera was her name, was applying for office to represent a group of people,” Jungeun trailed off. “That’s very different than here.”

Jiwoo nodded. All governing positions were by birthright in Milieu. She could see that more was on Jungeun’s mind besides the oddity of the character’s career choice.

(Also, Sooyoung slashing and jumping at every bush in front of them was very entertaining.)

“What about you?”

“Hmmmm?” Jiwoo kept her eyes trained on the knight, something Jungeun took note of.

“Dream job?”

“Um...well… I never really thought of it,” Jiwoo fiddled with her scratchy blouse - her only theatre-appropriate wear - as she mulled over the question.

As innocent as it was, Jiwoo never felt like she had a choice. Farming was her family’s way of life for centuries. Before she could explain herself, she could see Jungeun asking the same question to herself. How long had the Kims ruled over this land? Jiwoo could’ve answered the question herself if she stayed in school. 

Jungeun would have a way out of the kingdom. Maybe not so much away from her usual schedule. The royal blue decor that symbolized the Jung kingdom would replace the Kim kingdom’s crimson. The Jung’s swamps and fertile terraces would give something new for the Kim princess to look at. Jungeun’s marriage of convenience sounded like a marriage of change.

But a change given without her consent.

A change the charming knight - who was now swatting a posse of fireflies she had angered with her violent sword slashing - in front of them would have to accept as well, as she would be accompanying Jungeun at Jinsol’s request.

“I’m alright Princess Jungeun. No need to be alarmed. Just a few bugs is all,” Sooyoung narrated as she waved off the bugs left and right.

Jungeun in a smile as she caught a small giggled from the woman beside her. While the play had made her go through an existential crisis of her own, she could see how it affected Jiwoo as well. 

Jungeun was stuck as a royal for the rest of her life and Jiwoo had sworn she would be stuck as a fruit farmer as well. But maybe with what little power she had, it didn’t have to be this way for one of them.

---

One could take a girl out of the village but one cannot take the village instinct out of the girl.

Jiwoo just about gave Yeojin another reason to wear that ridiculous cone when she caught her approaching from behind from the shadow she cast over her.

“NOT MY BACK AGAIN!”

Scooping ice from the underground chiller, Jiwoo funneled them inside the cone to soothe the girl she flipped over. Jiwoo pulled out a chair for her to sit on. Without seeing her face, the handmaiden/cook knew she was coming to her with something important.

“Aunt Jiwoo, how did you know when you weren’t going to be a farmer?”

The sound of dripping water running down Yeojin’s cone filled in the awkward silence as Jiwoo grabbed the nearest rag to dry her up. Ever since Sooyoung (unknowingly) brought up Jiwoo’s job, she had been on an unpleasant trip down memory lane.

“I always thought I’d be a farmer to be honest. It just seemed like my only option. People liked to marry rich to get out of it and I don’t blame them. But not me. So when Sooyoung came along,” Jiwoo bit back a smile. “There was a moment when I thought that if I succumbed to my attraction to her, then that would mean I was desperate.”

“Too many big words Aunt Jiwoo.”

“Oh I’m sorry.”

“But I understood them perfectly,” Yeojin gave a thumbs up, accompanied by the clacking of shaking ice as she nodded.

“But then I realized that I was so bent on this one dream I thought I had, I almost lost my chance with her.” Jiwoo sighed in relief as water stopped running down Yeojin’s neck. “Does this have to do with why Chaewon and you ran away?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Jiwoo was tempted to flip her a second time.

“I don’t know,” the squire huffed. “I thought I’d always be a court musician because of my family. And then later I changed my mind to a knight because I wanted to renounce that part for a while because knights are so much cooler.”

Yeojin waited for Jiwoo to laugh, which she did right on cue.

“That’s all I knew. But not everything is as cool anymore. Like those blood oaths?” Yeojin held out her almost-healed palm. “They hurt!”

Another laugh. Maybe Yeojin can make a career out of this.

“But now I feel like it’s too late to change my mind.”

Yeojin was taking this time off duty to reflect.

(Literally as well as certain lighting transformed the material around her head to a distorted mirror.)

When Hyunjin took on mail duty, Yeojin didn’t feel like she got her job taken away from her. No one announced Queen Jinsol and Knight Sooyoung’s arrival but time still moved on without it. It wasn’t that Yeojin wasn’t important to the castlehold and its upkeep but that her squire status wasn’t all there was to her. 

Hoping to cheer up the young girl, Jiwoo clasped a hand on Yeojin’s shoulder.

“Yeojin, look at me.”

Yeojin tried.

“You don’t have to be what people think you should because of where your family comes from. Or because that’s what you thought growing up. I mean look at me, your sister wants me to be a teacher.”

Jiwoo learned a bunch of odd jobs - keep in mind, these were under desperate circumstances - when Hyejoo had them village-hopping to keep her identity safe.

Age was a factor and one could always find new passions as they got older. Maybe one day Hyejoo would take on another career and they'd support her through and through.

“WAIT! SCHOOL IS BACK IN SESSION?!”

---

“I apologize for her behavior.”

“Haseul, really, it’s okay,” Vivi retracted her hand reaching out, counting how many times she’s touched the beautiful court musician today. Maybe too many.

They were co-workers and co-teachers. Being affectionate was out of the question for the professional relationship they had.

Also wives.

They had finished running the three rascals out of the bedroom, organizing whatever looked out of place. Haseul straightened the bedsheets and Vivi tackled the mess that was her books.

Vivi actually did the scaring off. No one was taking Haseul’s threats to put down Vivi’s book seriously until Vivi came in, spouting a spell they’ve never heard of.

(“Azarath Metrion Zinthos…” Vivi widened her eyes for the full effect as she floated in.

“Oh no no no Aunt Teacher Vivi we’re sorry.”

“Please don’t curse me in my sleep.”

“You can’t curse me, I’m a princess!”)

“She’s been interested in all sorts of things recently,” Haseul explained. “Sorcery, juggling, auction hosting, knighthood. I mean we could’ve guessed that with her crush on Chaewon.”

Vivi chuckled in agreement, tucking the tainted book back to its rightful place:

Far away from her.

“I just always thought Yeojin and I would form a musical duo like most court musicians’ kids.”

Filing the rest of the books to cover the offending family heirloom, Vivi gestured for Haseul to take a seat on her bed, sitting right next to her.

Making sure the distance was professional.

“Haseul, she doesn’t have to take after your parents. Music might not be her passion.”

“Well she certainly liked banging on pots and pans and every surface like a drum.”

Haseul dug into her mind for another counterpoint but then saw that Vivi wasn’t even looking at her. Following the physician’s eyes, she was focused on the bookshelf in the corner of the bedroom where she hid the spellbook they snatched from the children’s hands.

Not moments ago, she had told Vivi she didn’t have to be part of some of her family practices. How hypocritical was it to preach the opposite about her own family.

“Vivi…”

“Yeah…”

The hollowness in Vivi’s voice terrified Haseul. Whatever those ancestors did had made Vivi afraid of one of the few relics of her homeland.

“You don’t have to be like them.”

“Thank you, Haseul,” Vivi didn’t hold back in patting respectfully on her wife’s thigh. Breaking her gaze from the bookshelf, she was met with the most sympathetic eyes. What was going on in her wife’s pretty mind of hers?

(And how was she ever going to describe them in her diary?)

“And neither does Yeojin,” Haseul admitted aloud.

Placing a hand on top of Vivi’s, Haseul felt like this moment - running their daughter and friends out of the room, fixing up their (unshared) room, and coming to an agreement - almost felt like they were actually married.

---

As for the longest-running married couple in the household, they were swadled up in each other’s arms, pausing their conversation.

Jungeun and Jinsol promised they’d continue this right where they left off at another time.

Smoke was rising from the corridor windows, a sign that dinner was being prepared.

(That or the young ones were up to something again.)

“I feel like we accomplished a lot today,” Jinsol puffed her cheeks out.

“Hmmmm?” Jungeun traced up the hemming of Jinsol’s shirt.

Jinsol was by far the most active queen in all the lands. Knight, arbiter, representative, entertainer, legislator, wife, mother, and friend. Jinsol had a lot on her plate. Today, all she did was pace up and down the corridor and listen. When their reign had run its course, Jungeun hoped she could have some rest.

She also remembered that she too needed rest. Unbeknownst to the citizens and some of the castlehold, she was contributing to protecting the people in her own way.

“I’m speaking for myself of course, but I’ve never felt more freer with you than I do now,”Jinsol thunked her head softly against Jungeun’s, missing these small moments with her.

Before, it was like walking on eggshells but now, she could project her adoration towards her with an open heart.

“Me too Jinsol,” Jungeun agreed. “I wish we could’ve done more though.”

She was speaking in terms of their relationship but the sentiment could be transferred to other endeavors. As queens, they exercised their jurisdiction as best they could, under the pretenses that the council would agree to their every decision.

(They didn't, which made their jobs harder than what their citizens thought.)

“I think we’ve done enough, my love.”

They didn’t do enough as parents if Chaewon needed to leave the castle for some gratification they couldn’t grant her.

“Then, why did Chaewon leave?”

The wafting smells of dinner only made their stomachs churn - Jungeun’s more than usual as she found herself more sensitive to the smell of food.

“I always thought we gave her everything. She never asked for more than we could provide. A little greedy at times,” Jinsol laughed a little but let Jungeun continue. “But within reason. And she was out there, practically alone, and we couldn’t protect her.”

Jinsol felt Jungeun move away from her, berating herself for something she couldn’t foresee. But Jinsol held her closer, taking part of the punishment.

“I’m disappointed too but we did everything we could to protect and teach her to protect herself. Archery lessons, self-defense lessons,” Jinsol was grasping for more reasons.

Jungeun nodded, snuggling closer to her wife to thank her for breaking her out of her tirade.

“You know? While you were teaching her to fight, I’ve done my part too…”

“Tell me more,” Jinsol gave Jungeun all the attention in the world.

“Well,” Jungeun blushed as she felt a hot flash coming. Probably Jinsol’s doing. “You know her Kirby dolls- “

“Jinsol, Jungeun, I didn’t expect to find you here.”

Vivi knew they were on the top floor of the castle but she didn’t expect to see them cuddling in the hallway. Seeing what door they were camping in front of, she understood immediately.

“What can we do for you, Vivi?” Jinsol smiled, kissing Junguen’s forehead to remind her that this conversation wasn’t over.

It was never meant to be.

Knowing she was growing desperate, Vivi cleared her head to know that her forbidden spellbook couldn’t have been in Jinsol and Jungeun’s possession. They probably didn’t even know it existed.

(Chaewon, on the other hand, would but she had been locked away for the whole day. She couldn’t have ransacked her medical bag since her arrival.)

“Nothing.” Vivi grinned at the married couple. “Nothing at all.”

---

“Do you think this is the right decision for me?” Jiwoo asked at dinner that evening.

Onew bit his tongue but saw that Jiwoo was debating something that no one would’ve passed up. To be able to travel to another kingdom, even for a job, was a dream come true.

Since Jiwoo started her relationship with Sooyoung, their reputation had improved among the commonwealth. Villages far and wide wanted to know what common village farmer attracted the attention of one of the few female knights from the Academy. That’s not to say there weren’t cynics who believed Jiwoo was only canoodling with the royal knight for money and power.

Which is something Onew and Luna hoped Jiwoo would never hear about.

This afternoon, Jiwoo was outside their much larger shack, courtesy of Queens Hyelim and Yubin, showing a letter from her beloved to their new neighbors, gushing at how Sooyoung was asking her to move to the Jung castle as Jungeun’s new handmaiden.

From what they heard, the former Kim princess treated her handmaidens well, barely letting them lift a finger unless necessary. They wouldn’t worry about Jiwoo’s promotion as they’ve come to adore the Jungeun princess due to her frequent hangouts at their shack and market stall.

Onew, however, was still warming up to the Kim kingdom knight.

“What do you mean?” Luna reached out to hold her daughter’s hand across their longer-than-they-were-used-to dining table.

“I don’t know. What if I’m not cut out for handmaidening?” Jiwoo scrunched up her forehead, wondering if that was even a word. “I don’t want Jungeun to regret asking for my services.”

“I guarantee you, she isn’t asking for another helping hand, Jiwoo. You know her by now. In fact, I think she only wants your company. Queen Jinsol is very gracious to let her request your presence.”

Onew could agree with that statement.

“And Sooyoung could use your company as well.”

But he couldn’t agree with that one.

“This just seems so different than what I’m used to. I don’t even know if this is what I’m supposed to be. I thought I was going to be a farmer for the rest of my life.”

Before Luna could get another word in, Onew reached across to hold Jiwoo’s other hand.

Looking at their new abode, the polish still fresh, Jiwoo didn’t need to work backbreaking hours to move her parents into somewhere nice. They could retire if they weren’t so stubborn.

A trait they definitely passed to their precious daughter.

“You can defy us Jiwoo, it’s okay. In fact, I encourage it. Don’t let our family hold you back from becoming something you really want to be.”

---

Haseul let out a monstrous groan as she heaved the heavy pool tunnel door open.

It would have been an easier task if she had an extra pair of hands but her favorite pair - shaking her head at the cheesiness of the thought - were preoccupied.

But, hopefully this would get her out of her stupor.

Haseul didn’t know when Vivi had dug out that wretched family heirloom of hers but she recalled a conversation in what was then Heejin and Vivi’s bedroom. She inspired Vivi to stow the book away. But she didn’t try hard enough as it had made its way into Vivi’s hands again.

She couldn’t help Jungeun heal. She couldn’t help Yeojin figure out her lifelong dream. She couldn’t even make the woman she loved make her feel like she was perfect the way she was.

But this one she could fix.

Vivi’s conscience, in whatever condition, could still be salvaged.

With a large bucket of water she lugged from the kitchen - another reason she was out of breath - she would literally wash away Vivi’s sins. If Yeojin and Chaewon had planned on sneaking in through the tunnel, the tunnel grates would’ve still been raised.

The castle physician had given Haseul a brief overview of the contents of this book. Pathokenesis, mind-reading incantations, locating charms, torture curses, ressurection spells. Each more dangerous and soul-searing than the last.

Even if the witch performing the spell got what they wanted, their good nature would be lost.

Placing the book at the edge of the tunnel, Haseul was ready to flush it out to sea.

Water had always made her feel more relaxed and safe, maybe it could cleanse this ancient text and heal their family.

“Haseul, is that my book?” A soft voice called from behind her.

Sticky fingers ran in the Bang family but Haseul was the most innocent of them. This would be the first time she stole from Vivi.

“Haseul, it’s okay.” Vivi reached out for the bucket and book, unsure if she wanted Haseul to be this close to her.

Vivi didn’t want to think Haseul would betray her to this extent but she knew she had reasons. If she had performed the tracking spell flawlessly, she would’ve been kilometers out to find Heejin by now.

But would Heejin like that Vivi disobeyed her own morals to find her?

Would Haseul?

“Vivi, I didn’t mean to. I know we’re wives and all but I wasn’t sure how far gone you were already.” Haseul placed the bucket down, exhausted in more ways than one.

The first time in years she referred to Vivi as her wife too.

“It’s okay to worry about me,” Vivi sighed, needing a grip on the reality she almost rewrote. Haseul’s hands were inviting enough, grabbing onto them. “Somebody had to.”

Vivi’s soft hands were cold and rough to the touch but Haseul didn’t let that deter her. She squeezed Vivi’s hands to remind her to loosen her grip.

The same Vivi was still in there.

With all going on in the castle, it was easy to miss Vivi’s downward spiral into delirium. But Haseul had always been perceptive.

A Bang family characteristic.

“But why go this far?”

Not to doubt Vivi’s skills but who’s to say it would be the same Heejin that returned to them. Hyunjin might even be more heartbroken than how she is now.

(Something she needed to admit out loud.)

“I didn’t want to let her go yet. I guess throughout this all, it was me I let go,” Vivi could now feel the flaming speck’s burn. Something she knew Haseul would notice with their close proximity. “I couldn’t lose my daughter as well as you.”

Sure enough, Haseul focused on the small bruised burn on Vivi’s cheek. 

“I haven’t gone anywhere..”

Haseul reached up to brush it away, thinking it was a smudge or ink stain, not something that hurt her sweet co-teacher. The damned book she was holding fell to their feet.

“Yeah, you have,” Vivi was done being cryptic around Haseul, kicking the book away. Years wasted without proper acknowledgement of the feelings they knew were brewing for one another. “And so did I.”

“But now I’m here,” Haseul confessed. 

With nothing in-between them, Haseul and Vivi met for their first kiss.

---

“So you two were in there a long time?”

“Shut up,” Haseul tossed the nearest object - a glass of water - at her sister.

But having a knack of knowing when water was near - which wasn’t very useful in knight academy unless they were doing water survival training - Yeojin dodged it effortlessly and caught the glass before it hit the ground.

It was nearing sundown and Haseul had just come from Vivi’s room. Talking about everything and nothing, Haseul had never known time to fly by so fast. Maybe Vivi was one of the “bad ones” and had cast some time-fast-forwarding spell on her.

But Haseul knew Vivi would never do anything to jeopardize her good standing as a witch descendant.

“So, did you convince Aunt Vivi to bring back the bat?”

Yeojin held in a laugh at the object that the water spilled on. It was supposed to be Hyunjin’s seneschal portrait to hang in the Great Hall but with the liquid botched the drying process, making Hyunjin look like a horse.

“I did not.”

“B-b-but Y-ye-yerim’s going to hate me,” Yeojin’s spit aided in ruining the portrait more and more.

“I promise you, she won’t,” Haseul said only half-seriously.

Taking Yeojin under her wing, she steered her away from the botched knight paintings and led them to their bedroom. She fought the urge to peek into Vivi and Heejin’s room and could hear Vivi reprimanding Heejin on going through her private belongings.

“If someone told you to jump off a roof, would you do it?” Vivi questioned, her stare unrelenting.

“How tall is this building exactly?” Heejin sheepishly asked.

This would mark Heejin’s first lecture under her new moms. Well, one for now.

Haseul had Yeojin to take care of right now.

“I know it’s hard and she might ignore you for a few days but she is going to have to accept that her bat is dead.”

“But what if there was a way to bring it back to life? Then we don’t have to accept it,” Yeojin reasoned. She didn’t need school - she was still gathering a petition to excuse her from Vivi and Haseul’s Academy - to think logically.

“And then what, the world will be a better place if there was no death?”

“Yes?”

“It could but,” Haseul blew her hair out of her face as she tucked them away into their room. Her parents touring more than usual - to distract from all the death and destruction from the last attack - meant she had to step into her maternal shoes.

(Not that she didn’t already have an adoptive daughter a room away.)

“Then you might take things for granted. You could ignore someone you’re mad at for months because you know they won’t die.”

“Or hold off telling them you love them,” Yeojin baited under her breath as they changed into the nighttime clothes.

“What was that?”

“Nothing.”

But even if Yerim’s disappointment terrified her more than anything, Yeojin knew she had to accept the inevitable. Maybe the bat was on its way to death. Maybe not. Maybe Yerim would never speak to her again. Maybe not. Maybe Aunt Jungeun would never get better and Mom and Dad would never come back. Maybe one day they weren’t beholden to live a life following their parents’ footsteps.

---

Hyejoo thought her transformation in the castle would not be as eventful as before but the turnstile of visitors she’s had lately begs to differ.

Her mother had just finished ranting to her how she might have triggered something within her wife this morning and Hyejoo let Sooyoung cry into her fur before escorting her back to the tunnel entrance.

Then her other mother stopped by to ask if Sooyoung had stopped by.

Yerim zoomed back in for another tickle fight before sprinting out.

Then Hyejoo swore her heart fell out of her chest, hearing Haseul’s voice carry down the tunnel. The tunnel door closed moments later which granted her peace.

“It’s just hard you know? Because if I say the words, it means I accepted it.”

Hyunjin thunked her head against the concrete walls, unbothered that Haseul could’ve aborted the entire hideout, rather looking if Hyejoo was processing her words.

Unbeknownst to her, everyone, yes even Hyejoo, was worried for the knight’s wellbeing. She carried on her day-to-day schedule but for menial tasks, she needed reminders. She bathed infrequently and skipped meals. If she was out on missions, it would be excusable.

“And if I accepted it, it would mean that I didn’t try hard enough to deny it.”

Funny how Yerim was honing in on her wolfish physical attributes that Hyunjin trained before and Hyunjin was doing the same with her intuitive ones which Yerim was a natural at.

“We never said it out loud but we were definitely more than friends at that point.”

Hyejoo wasn’t a full animal but at least Hyunjin was trying. She was paying attention to Hyejoo’s every eye flicker and movement, reading her like she could understand.

“So if I don’t say it loud, it doesn’t change the fact that she could be dead right?”

Hyejoo lifted her shoulders slightly. To human eyes, it looked like an animal stretching its limbs.

“Is that a yes?”

Hyejoo dramatized the movement - her parents were subscribed fans of the theatre for her to pick up pantomime. Communication with animals (and hybrids) wasn’t Hyunjin’s forte.

(If she could talk, she’d say her communication with humans could use some training as well.)

“Oh. You’re shrugging. That’s a shrug,” Hyunjin deciphered. “So you don’t think she’s dead. Okay. Got it.”

Chaewon thought the same about Hyejoo for years but was proven wrong a couple months ago. She knew what holding onto lost hope was like.

But now Chaewon was back in her life and even if she disappeared for a day, Hyejoo now knew that inside that hope was something more.

Something she could put in words unlike her half-furry friend here.

Once she was back in her human body, maybe she would say them.

“Right. Good talk. Have a good dinner.”

Hyunjin placed down five steaks that Jiwoo cooked up rare and went on her way.

Hyejoo had to point to the right direction of the castle as Hyunjin started walking towards the shore.

---

The Jung castle rarely held funerals and this would be the first one that the current residents would witness. A rather confused Jinsol had freshly showered from knight academy and joined her wife’s side as they peered at the coffin. Smaller than what they were used to but bittersweet all the same.

The loudest crier was not the owner of the dead bat but the perpetrator herself. She could barely get through her eulogy before breaking down into tears. Yeojin cried even harder when Yerim scooped her up in her arms, forgiving her.

(Hyunjin fought the urge to do the same with a distraught Heejin.)

“It’s time,” Vivi whispered to Yerim as she lowered the box into the ground in their garden.

Yeojin’s wailing was drowned out by Jinsol and Haseul’s shoveling.

Vivi wondered if they could’ve skipped this entire event if she had brought the bat back to life. Every life was set to expire and she had the power to prevent this.

Another bat of equal age would suffer but she would do anything to make her family happy.

But seeing a smile grace Yerim’s face at the reception Haseul and Jungeun put together and Yeojin putting on a show per usual, she knew it was a bittersweet reminder of the beauty and ugliness of life.

It went on regardless of the choices you make.

“You don’t want to add a tombstone, Yerim?” Vivi later asked as they looked out into the garden before the sun set.

The brown patch of dirt would soon be obscured when the grass claimed its place there.

It would be like the bat wasn’t even there.

“I think I’ve accepted it now,” Yerim punctured with a finality a girl her age shouldn’t have.

But it inspired Vivi to carry that energy with her if someone as close to her would leave as well. And if she lost her way, she hoped someone in this lovely castle she called her family would bring her back.

---

What would’ve been Haseul and Vivi’s first kiss was interrupted by the supernatural.

A ghost.

Or rather it was Yeojin tripping over herself and falling face-first into the spa room. She could’ve sworn this was the kitchen as she heard Hyunjin muttering to herself - something she was doing a lot now - and going in this direction.

“Yeojin, are you alright?”

“I do not like the cone of shame.”

For the second time this week, Vivi and Haseul, this time more awake, escorted Yeojin to the infirmary (aka Vivi’s bedroom).

Haseul shot Vivi an apologetic glance as Vivi checked Yeojin’s condition and took the time to look around Vivi’s room.

It was in disarray since she last saw it. Books ripped from their shelves, drawers layered open, medical supplies strewn about.

“Hang on, I need to take this cone off to see you better.”

“So I can keep this off?” Yeojin baited.

“No.”

Haseul knew she was the reason Vivi ransacked her own room but desperate times called for desperate measures.

And seeing her wife rough handle her baby sister to put the cone back on, she was happy to see a more carefree Vivi take the place of the zombie haunting this castle this year.

Her eyes came across a letter from the Census Bureau, wondering what Vivi would need that for. It was torn apart haphazardly, showing a full report of people born in… Heejin’s birth year.

Meeting Vivi’s eyes, Haseul kept the question at the tip of her tongue.

“Yeojin, why don’t you do me a favor and get rid of this?”

Vivi slid the report off her desk and into Yeojin’s eager hands.

Her sister’s relationship with destruction, Haseul would never understand.

“Yes! Something for me to do!”

“Well we can’t have our squire sitting idle for too long,” Vivi chuckled, making sure the cone was secure.

“Actually I have an announcement to make…”

Haseul and Vivi exchanged confused looks. There was no scroll in sight for Yeojin to read off of.

(Not like she could anyways.)

“I am moving on from being a squire. I probably won’t be a musician - sorry Haseul - but I will figure it out one day,” Yeojin beat her chest proudly and went on her way.

Haseul didn’t understand what brought upon this change in Yeojin, nor did she understand the purpose of knowing everyone born in their daughter’s birth year, but as she saw Vivi tuck away the family heirloom with a resolute smile, she knew she didn’t need to understand to accept the changes in her life.

---

“Jinsol?”

Vivi wondered if one day, she’d perform such distressed acts for her family one day.

“Yes?”

If there was a spell in that inherited book of hers to eradicate the worse of sicknesses from a loved one, would she use it with as much conviction that Jinsol had now?

“Jungeun’s not something to fix.”

Jinsol wondered if the day came when she found the cure if Jungeun would try it.

“I know,” Jinsol swallowed. “I know.”

She loved Jungeun through it before, doing her best to understand and listen. Coddling Jungeun wasn’t an option but pretending it wasn’t happening was worse. But Jungeun was making the last option too easy.

Every time she was home, Jungeun pretended to be a portrait perfect image.

The one the council had in their ballroom but not the one Jinsol loved.

“I just don’t want you to do something that’ll compromise your morals,” Vivi straightened a few knick-knacks on Jinsol’s desk.

(Something Jungeun and her had memorized and Chaewon and Co. didn’t do a good job keeping inconspicuous when they snuck in here.)

Jinsol crinkled an eyebrow up.

“Or your love.”

Both eyebrows.

“I just want you to think that if Jungeun didn’t have this-this-this part of her,” Vivi would’ve used a more accurate term if one existed. “And you could get rid of it, if that means you’ll love her more, less, or just the same.”

Vivi used Jinsol sitting down in puzzlement as the bookend of their conversation, leaving Jinsol to her thoughts.

Jinsol would continue her research - only from credentialed sources for Vivi’s sake - and love Jungeun from afar. When her wife was ready to tell her, Jinsol hoped she’d have some options ready for her. Not to increase the love that she possessed - as if she could love her more - but to acknowledge and show Jungeun she would stand by her in sickness and in health.

And in both simultaneously.

---

Jiwoo ran after Haseul and Vivi with a meat cleaver as they ran out with all the dishware to set tonight's table.

While happy for their invigorated relationship, she could sense them reclaiming their old jobs and she couldn’t help but feel territorial.

Feeling a familiar hand in the back of her trouser pockets, Jiwoo was spun around into the arms of her handsy wife.

“Are you feeling much better?” 

Jiwoo tilted her head to the side, waiting for clarification.

“This morning. In the kitchen,” Sooyoung eyed the cleaver warily.

Tossing the weapon onto the table next to them - if it was damaged they could request a new one - Jiwoo rested her hands on Sooyoung’s shoulders.

Sooyoung caught bits and pieces of Jiwoo’s pep talk towards Yeojin, remembering how Jiwoo was caught between living a life of comfort with her or carrying out her family’s legacy. When Jiwoo first moved into the Jung castle, she waited on Jungeun’s every hand and foot, putting every handmaiden in history to shame.

“Oh you’re not still hung up on that are you?” Jiwoo scratched at Sooyoung’s shirt, the softness different than the fancy clothes she first sewed together.

“I just wanted to make sure you were okay,” Sooyoung melted under her wife’s touch.

Their little cottage made it harder to give each other space when the other was upset. This castle made it too easy but Sooyoung wanted to clear things up before bedtime.

“I was a little distraught but I’m still here,” Jiwoo grinned up at her wife.

Handmaidening wasn’t a job she was passionate about and maybe she still had dreams she could now live out.

Her own pep talk inspired her

“I’m happy you are.”

Ignoring Yeojin maniacally throwing something into the dying oven fire, this married duo pressed up against each other and shared a gentle kiss as the heat from the kitchen dwindled.

Jiwoo silently thanked Sooyoung for waiting for her to open up to her. It was a given due to their romantic connection but a constant reminder was nice.

“Where’d you learn that pocket trick?” Jiwoo thought back to how Sooyoung smoothly got into this position.

“I remembered it from a play we saw,” Sooyoung declared proudly. “The only scene I remember really.”

Their first real theatre date, just the two of them, differed in that they were more distracted by being in each other’s presence than the play itself. Also, the absence of a third-wheeling Kim princess.

“Maybe long down my lineage, we were magicians,” Sooyoung wiggled her eyebrows, rolling with the praises.

Jiwoo shook her head, knowing that no matter what species or job Sooyoung’s family hailed from, Sooyoung herself made all the right choices to find her way into her heart.

---

“Now what could you possibly desire sister?”

Vivi bowed before her elder, seeing as she didn’t have to introduce herself. Like how wolves can sniff out other wolves, witches had a similar recognition tactic.

Unlike Vivi’s family who reformed their skills to modern medicinal practices, others became showpeople using slight of hand tricks or fortune tellers using divine intuition.

“As you know, Princess Jungeun will be moving to the Jung kingdom to marry. And some of her staff, myself included, will be going with her.”

Madame Zeroni nodded, having known this already.

“And you want to know if they’ll fall in love?”

“No.”

“If you’ll fall in love?”

“What? No.”

If there was one thing Vivi hated of her kind, it was their natural ability to be coy and provocative. 

(Like her siblings.) 

“If that lovesick farmer will join that other lovesick knight.”

“Ah so they will be reunited,” Vivi thought aloud but shook her head to keep focus. “It may seem strange but I feel scared about this transfer. I don’t know how our kind is treated there and I was wondering if you could give me some advice.”

Madame Zeroni gave the healer descendant her full attention. 

“If they fear you, it’s because they don’t understand. They can’t comprehend the complexity of our kind. Our generation,” Vivi tried not to point out their age difference. “Is lucky to have broken away from our enchantments and can choose for ourselves. We aren’t the ancestors they heard about…”

Vivi hung onto every word, storing it for a rainy - which seemed more frequent after meeting Haseul - day.

“But what if my current practice isn’t enough?”

What if I’m not enough?

Vivi worried that as she would be responsible for a quick conception and safe birth of the Jung heir, the challenges would only grow tenfold and her choices would be harder and harder.

“Then I will curse them for always and eternity.”

Vivi’s eyes widened and Madame Zeroni waved her off, knowing the physician would not have it easy. She trusted Vivi would choose her morals over her desperation.

An ominous howl made both reformed healers look towards the mountains. Where their predecessors fled to when the persecution was too much. They knew if worse came to it, they would find refuge there.

But in all her years of life - like she would reveal her age - Zeroni held steadfast and resilient.

Vivi would nonetheless do the same.

---

No one commented on how Jungeun and Jinsol came in solemnly, faces fresh with water they splashed to hide their tear stains. 

No one commented how Sooyoung was extra chivalrous with Jiwoo this evening.

No one commented how Haseul and Vivi came in hand-in-hand, giggling at a joke they shared between their whispers.

No one commented how coned Yeojin unknowingly sat in Heejin’s usual place.

(But everyone did cast a look towards Hyunjin.)

No one commented Yerim coming in sadly alone after trying to get Chaewon out of her room. The princess had to be awake by now.

Smalltalk sparse and silverware clattering plenty - with Haseul and Vivi taking turns funneling food into Yeojin’s cone - the Jung castlehold had dinner.

Eventually, Jinsol would get a hold of the congratulatory letter commemorating her massacre.

Jungeun beside looked like she was eating for two. The queens skipped on two meals today and no one wanted to disturb the peace yet. 

(Some of the residents had a better grasp of the real details behind the murder but none of them pointed to Jinsol.)

The gate bells ringing interrupted their inner battles and everyone but Jiwoo was surprised that Yeojin wasn’t jumping at the opportunity to greet the door knockers.

Before anyone who would take the chore, the Jung princess appeared in the doorway. 

Chaewon looked like she aged. Everyone wondered what she was thinking about, attributing her as the mastermind to the runaway stunt a few days ago. Jungeun and Jinsol held onto each other to prevent themselves from running and hugging their daughter. The rest waved politely from their seats.

“Good evening Chaewon,” someone was brave enough to ask.

“Good evening,” she replied curtly.

Having woken up midday, Chaewon would’ve come down sooner if she didn’t hear her parents having a conversation outside her bedroom doors. Leaning against it, back-to-back with her parents, she heard firsthand of her parents’ deepest regrets.

On the surface, they appeared as healthy as any married couple. Healthier than most royals put on.

“What’s in the letter, Chaewon?”

But Chaewon came to learn of how much damage they had done to themselves and from accepting the decisions built around them. Unable to escape their fate since birth, they were stuck in a cycle of generational trauma.

“More details on Jinsol’s murder?”

In her hands, she held an unopened scroll that she retrieved from the postmaster this evening. The late hour of this delivery elevated the severity behind the words on the scroll. To everyone at the table, nothing could be more pressing than Jinsol’s alleged heroism.

“Murder?! I swear, Jungeun, I never touched a soul on this mission.”

“I-I-I believe you.”

The castlehold would learn in a few seconds it was another congratulatory message but this time, towards Chaewon’s desperate decision to marry.

“I can vouch for her because she was with me the whole time. Chaewon, don’t believe it. Hyunjin help me out.”

(Hyejoo was in for a rude awakening the next morning.)

“Huh? Sorry I wasn’t paying attention.”

When Chaewon was late to dinner after a long day making village appearances, Jungeun (and when she was home, Jinsol) would stay behind and spoonfeed her precious daughter. Babying her as if she couldn't feed herself. (And when she was home, Jinsol would bob back and forth, almost knocking Chaewon off her chair, goading for Jungeun to sneak her a few bites.) Sometimes, Jungeun gave in but most of the time she'd playfully roll her eyes.

“Chaewon, you believe me right?"

But one decision made that charming moment obsolete.

"My behavior hasn’t driven you away right?”

Witnessing the uproar around the dining table, Chaewon would come to learn that playing into the Council’s whims - something her parents did everything in their power to protect her from - the queen-to-be put herself and everyone in the castle into the cycle once more.

 

NEXT CHAPTER UPDATE: SOME MOON CYCLE, GIVE OR TAKE

 

Q (ourtuneisohigh): To our new readers: welcome! I hope everyone is coping with 2020 and getting the resources you need (If not, get political and (preferably) overthrow your government.) Below are petitions and resources you can donate/sign/read, including Orbits for Black Lives which has made great strides with their project to help Loona gain awareness of the BLM movement. (This list isn't conclusive.)

If you follow N on Twitter - you should - you've read that we have 8-10 chapters left. Some side characters that seemed insignificant in flashbacks are returning to tie some loose ends so I hope your memory is fresh. (Tbh, I have to reread this fic every time I write a chapter.) Twitter

N (LazyNinja on ao3): Thanks for your support of this story, things are getting more exciting for our charaters and we hope you'll let us know your thoughts here or on Twitter. As things go on in this world often out of our control we hope you can do what you can to help but also take care of your own mental health as well. Please treat others as you would like to be treated and remember to drink some water.
Please use: #FMBkingdom Twitter | CC

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