I'm running.
Down long, winding, confusing streets, past signs all scribbled in Korean, pushing through crowds of school uniforms, suits and ties, and casual clothes. I'm running. I'm running away from someone in this place I've technically never been before, but some how I knew exactly where I was going. Because it's the same thing every night.

The same exact dream every single night.

I'm always running, I'm always frantic, and I'm always caught in the end. It always happens as I'm passing this bright yellow sign with black text advertising something about the newest weight loss tea. A gentle yet firm touch, a strong grip, and a tug that causes me to spin around until I hit his warm body face first, hands pushing against his chest.

"_____________-ah! Don't be stupid, you could get killed!" His dark brown eyes, were almost at the point of painfully mesmerizing, his eyebrows furrowed so hard that they caused deep wrinkles to form on his forehead, and his face. Oh my goodness his face. It was the perfect combination of boyish yet manly, with a personality and body to match. He could literally be showcased at a museum for fine art cause that's pretty much what he is. Plus so much more.

I mentally screamed at myself to say no. I wanted so badly to stay with him and feel safe and protected. But each dream is like an out of body experience, where I knew exactly what I was going to say but I had no way of stopping it.

"I'm sorry, I have to."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My eyes snapped open. I bolted up from my pillow, checking it briefly for any drool stains left from last night. All clear. Outside, the frantic morning commute had already started for some people. I blankly stared out the window for a few minutes, watching the tiny figures scurry back and forth on the sidewalks and across the streets. 

My mind is always fried after I wake up. For the past 3 years, I've been having these dreams that made me feel like I was in some romance, thriller movie. The first one happened when I was a senior in college. I thought I was just having some kind of weird hallucinations from caffeine overdose during finals week but they kept coming even after I stopped drinking coffee. In the first dream, I was floating above this weird, reflective surface. The sky and the lighting around me was somewhere between golden hour and dusk. I was in all white, the skirt of the dress billowing around me with the nonexistent wind. And there, right in front of me, was a boy also dressed in white, suspended in mid air with a red string tied around his wrist that led to me. I tried pulling on the string to bring us closer together but nothing worked. Every night, it was the same thing. The same desperate attempt at saving him and saving me.

The dream changed for the first time when I moved to New York City to start my first post-undergrad job. I got hired at a design firm located in the Chelsea area of Manhattan and moved there to start my new young adult life. My new roommate was chill, my new life was exciting, and my new job was amazing. I had also finally gotten used to the weird floating dream that I wouldn't wake up every morning, feeling drained and depressed. Life just doesn't like to make things easy for you though. I woke up in the middle of the night the second dream came in a panic. I was walking down the route I always take to work but this time, everything was in slow motion. The noises around me were