I’m feeling angsty today, okay!! Cuz I see all these JeongCheol moments during the Japan concert and I just nfdsnvjdshvdsvdsvnsjdfd

Sorry, lost my cool there but here is some angst you guys!

“My first friend is Joshua”

“Joshuji, yo man!”

“Joshua, did you get your ticket?”

“Hehehe Joshuji”

…

“Yoon Jeonghan, my brother.”

To all these moments, all these memories; I have thought of them as nothing more than events that happened with my FRIEND. But I guess I was wrong because I never thought of you as my friend. When exactly did it change? I’m not sure.

Joshua can still remember the first time the two of them meet. In that dingy, green practice room. Filled with more than ten boys whose age varies from 13 to 18. And meeting him… Well, it was not like that Disney moment where the world stopped moving; no, instead Joshua just felt the need to talk to that person. To that confuse boy who was awkward and can’t mingle with anyone because they’re still a bit insecure inside.

To those nights that they talked about their troubles. Or to those days when they just can’t keep the tears flowing from their eyes.

As Joshua reminisced all these memories, his eyes shifted towards the laughing brown-haired angel who was busy flirting with their leader.

Outside their group, they were ship by multiple carats. Their ship name is called JeongCheol, of course, the company is aware that by giving fan service they will increase the revenues they received from the merch produced by these two guys but what they don’t know, what the fans were probably second-guessing already. Internally, inside the group, it’s no longer just a ship name but a reality.

He still remembers when the two announced it to the whole group. It was the after-party during DWC era; everyone was so happy that they’re finally getting recognized, not just nationally, but internationally as well. Drinks were spread out and pizzas served everywhere to the guys inside their dorm. When suddenly their leader called their attention.

They thought that it would be one of the cheesy speech that Seungcheol always does whenever he feels emotional but… it was different from what they all expected.

“Guys, can I have your attention for a moment!” S.Coups shouted from amidst the cacophonous noise produced by different members – but mostly the BooSeokSoon trio.

“Coups-hyung, we don’t need your cheesy talks,” replied by Seungkwan who is already high from eating a lot of chocolates.

“Hey, you’ll never know maybe he’ll break the tradition this time,” DK commented from the side.

“After you, hyung, I want a go as well!!” added by Hoshi in the background.

“Sure, sure. But that is not what I want to say… You guys, Hannie and I want to say something,” he says this part softly, pulling out a blushing Jeonghan by his side.

“Cheollie, do you think it’s the right time?” Jeonghan asked by Seungcheol’s side. But their leader just chuckled, looking at the other softly.

“It’s fine Hannie, they deserve to know. They’re our brothers, after all.”

At this point, everyone was just confused. Their faces just full of question marks except for two people in the background who realizes what’s happening.

“Guys, I want you to know that Hannie and I are in a relationship.” And the whole room exploded; the BooSeokSoon trio was certainly ‘shookt’ while Mingyu, Wonwoo, and the others congratulated the two.

At that moment, Joshua knew he had to leave. He gave a weak “congrats, you guys.” Before turning away from the scene. Fleeing from the sudden pain in his chest.

He stumbled outside the door, closing it swiftly behind him, not knowing that there was another sharing his torment.

“You too, hyung.” It was a statement. A fact. An acknowledgement. Joshua raised his head to look at his kindred soul.

“Jihoon.” The two just stared, not crying, but the pain reflecting on both their eyes.

“I guess we’re just sore losers,” the other said bitterly.

“I guess so…”

“Shua-hyung, you don’t have to look at them you know,” Jihoon said, plopping down on his side. He leaned his head on the elder’s shoulder. “You’re just hurting yourself more.”

Joshua just chuckled harshly, putting his head between his hands. “I don’t know Hoonie. I want to ask him to stay away but… I can’t. I just can’t deny him.”

“But hyung, you’re just setting yourself for another heartbreak. Something you can’t afford to have right now.”

“I realize that. But, you know what’s funny? I wrote a song asking him to come back because I’m too much of a coward to face him. God, Hoonie, how pathetic am I?”

Jihoon just smiled ironically. “We’re alike hyung.”

“When do you think this pain will go away?”

“Never, but we can definitely learn from it.”