RILIE (MARCH, 2011)

     I don’t know when I start adapting to Changmin’s presence and being in the spotlight. I’m still pointed at—yes, by every girl on campus—but there’s not much to worry about, considering that I don’t have many girlfriends to start with. As most girls put it, being a boss in the labs and solving complex equations aren’t exactly part of the appeal.

      Everywhere I go—with or without Changmin—I hear whispers that are loud enough to be heard across the courtyard. I can imagine the innuendos these girls fantasize about, but I bet they’ll be catastrophically disappointed to know the ugly truth: we are not friends with benefits nor am I guaranteed every VIP access to all sorts of extravagant appearances. The glamor belongs to Changmin’s life, not mine. When we are together, we spend time discussing enthalpy of formation and debate over the gravitational force equation applicable to the whole universe.  

      Surprisingly, simply having these silly disputes really makes me enjoy Changmin’s company—even if he often haphazardly runs off in the middle to some eccentric appointment. During these times, there is always the silver convertible that punctually picks him up.

     While teaching three-dimensional projectiles to Changmin one night, I notice that his phone periodically vibrates on top of his notebooks. Each time the screen flashes, he cuts off the conversation to check the latest message. When he apologizes for checking the phone for the fifth time that night, and we aren’t even half done one question, I slam my hand down.  

      He jumps and gapes at me. “Sorry! Last time, I promise.”

      I ignore the empty promise. “Alright, spill it—who is she?”

      “Huh?”

      “The girlfriend?” I motion towards his phone and the intensity of concern written on his face.

      He stammers a weak “it’s not my girlfriend” and shoves his phone under a ream of worksheets.

      “I’m not nosy about your love life, Changmin. It’s just getting kind of annoying—I still have my own work to do, you know?”

      “I’ll turn it off.”

      I watch his reluctant expression and sneers. “No, you are not.”

      He falls silent. He definitely isn’t.

      “Huh, no wonder you turned that girl down on Valentine’s day,” I say with a smirk, “No one has ever turned her down before. If you had a girlfriend, that explains everything.”

      He scowls at me. “Can we just not talk about this? It’s not what you think, by the way.” He says exasperatedly.

      I don’t know why I’m being so immature. It must be human’s natural tendency to be attracted to gossip. When the phone buzzes again under the paper, we both jump and glare at each other. Instantly, both Changmin and I nearly tackle each other to get to the cell phone. And remembering exactly where he hid it last, I win.

      “You are the last person I’d expect to invade someone’s privacy,” he narrows his eyes at me.

      “I’m invading no one’s privacy,” I make a face at him, ignori