I sigh at the soft caress of gentle fingertips up and down my . I've never felt anything as close to this especially during the days when I've been keeping things to myself. Everything seems to have fallen into place even if there's still no certainty in anything that comes my way. I smile as I feel Joo Hyuk's soft lips leaving a kiss on my right shoulder. I open my eyes to see him looking down at me, the white sheet covering his lower half as I thought that maybe the only certainty I've been looking for in the duration of my entire existence is here—smiling like a lovestruck fool in front of me. I snuggle the pillow beneath me even more as I continue laying on my front, staring at the man that's pouting like a child deprived of candy on Halloween. I chuckle before shifting to lay my head on his chest instead as he kisses the top of my head, releasing a contented sigh right after.

     The warmth radiating from his skin consumes me, making my head feel like it's much higher than seventh heaven. He's like a drug that could keep me going for days, all the while healing me of all the things that have been poisoning my emotions and my way of thinking. Words alone cannot express how thankful I am that he's right here beside me rather than with somebody else because I'm sure that if that ever happened, I would die of the pain. He has made it clear from the very beginning that he has entrusted his happiness to me which means that I owe him mine. If I had so much hesitation back then because of how I scared I am of getting hurt or getting the shorter end of things, all of those fears have come to fade with the anger and sadness I felt when he decided to leave us. There's much more to him than all these gestures and these words. There's much more to him than the lab coats and the money. Because to me, no matter how many times you try to change him into different forms, he will always be the same.

     He will always be Nam Joo Hyuk.

     My Nam Joo Hyuk.

     Mine to love, mine to keep.

     "What are you thinking about?" his deep voice startles me from my reverie as I shut these thoughts out and tilt my head up to look at him. His face is tinged with a hint of worry as the lines appeared on the sides of his lips, making his frown even more evident. Nevertheless, he looks stunning. Most people would've told me that the man should be the one telling the woman that. But our relationship exists to destroy the stereotypes and gender roles.

     "You," I answer simply, directly, no dilly-dallying because that's how honest I want us to be. We've gone through so much in the years that we've been together and apart. The very thing that always attempted to break us is our lack of communication. I don't want to repeat that mistake ever again. It's not worth it to see the person you're so sure of in so much pain. "I always think about you."

     "And I, you, love," he whispers, taking a hold of my chin to tilt it up so he could leave a feather of a kiss on my lips. It felt like it was barely there, but it made me want to jump a couple hundred times all the same. "I've got one question, though," he says before reaching out to the bedside table as I pull the sheet higher so that it covers my body as I sit up to lean on the headboard. "It's about this thing for next year," he continues, still searching for something in the bedside drawer.

     "What is it?" I ask, reaching for my phone on my bedside table as I check the time. "Wow, it's early," I mutter before opening up the messages and e-mails that I wasn't able to see yesterday. I could hear the rustling of papers and bumping of things as Joo Hyuk keeps searching. My mind starts to wonder about what it could possibly be.

     "I can't find it," he sighs, running his hand through his hair. "I'll have to ask next time," he sighs again, clearly frustrated. If it's something not extremely important, then why is he so worked up about it? I move closer to him, examining his face and gauging for something that I might have missed. The room was suddenly filled with silence as he stares back at me, probably trying to think about why I'm acting so weird to the point where I also start questioning myself. "What is it?"

     I stare at him for a few seconds more, thinking. "Why are you so pissed about it?" I ask as he chuckles while shaking his head. He pulls me to him and it's got me wondering even more.

     "I'm not pissed," he gently traces shapes on the skin that covers my rib cage as I bask at how soothing it actually feels. "I'll find it soon