“What is this place?” They came to this absurdly secluded patch of green Hongbin never paid attention to on top of a hill significantly far away from the city.

He thinks about reinforcing the psicopath comment from earlier but he won't. Taekwoon already had too much sass thrown on him for a day. “I used to come here when I was younger… To think, cool off.”

“You dragged me into the woods to do something I do every waking moment of my goddamn life?” Taekwoon smiles at him over his shoulder, dragging him by the hand still. “If you did I swear I'll push you down that cliff.”

“I brought you here because I wanted to be here with you. Is that so bad?” They finally stop, and Hongbin can see the lights off the car behind them but not much else.

Just the city.

And its toxic white lights… It's sorta pretty.

Taekwoon sits on the floor with a little pained whine and Hongbin does the same out of impulse. “Are you going to hold my hand forever?”

“Does it bother you?” Taekwoon turns to look at him and Hongbin gives a dismissive shrug.

“I mean your hands are sweaty but it's tolerable… not pleasant but... it's okay.” Taekwoon brings his knuckles to his bruised lips, he says nothing at that. “Why you brought me here? We could think anywhere… I could at least.”

“This place kind of gave me some time off that city… away from the Federation and my father and… well just everything. When I started freaking out.” He sighs, he sighs and Hongbin swallows on absolutely nothing. “I wanted to talk to you.”

“About?” Thankfully his voice doesn't shake.

“I'm sorry for making you worry about me… I mean, I forgot you're not used to how things go for me.” A pause. “I don't usually… I normally don't have anyone but Wonshik making sure I don't die.” He sounds sheepish about it, humor to alleviate the tenseness of this subject. “It must have scared you.”

“Well I mean, I never witnessed an arrest before.” He retreats his own hands back to his knees, feeling that familiar urge to start fidgeting again. “And with the things we hear… about the guardians and stuff.”

“Yeah… I'm used... To this I mean, all this.” Taekwoon turns his eyes to the city. “I'm sorry… I didn't even think you would… You would bother that much.” He says, picking at his nails. “Not saying you're heartless either it's just… I mean, I'm used to been on my own all the time I forget people… That people care, about what happens to other people.”  He says, awkwardly.

Hongbin can handle much, he can handle angry and heartless but awkward is something he can't. So he kisses him, kisses him and hopes this is enough assurance for anything he could say would be either stupid or cheeky.

None sound appropriate.

And they stumble to the car again, in the dark with their eyes closed and tripping on the roots on the ground and crushing sticks under the soles of their sneakers, not even to get inside properly for Taekwoon presses him to the side of the car and it's good enough, hands roaming aroundhis body as if he is looking for a switch or trying to commit his body to memory. That lump on the back of Taekwoon's neck reminding him this is not just anyone else.

The latent taste of fresh blood from his slip lip and the ever present taste of melon candy, the night is chilly and humid but the metal of the car on his back is warm, tiny bugs floating around the headlights. “Thank God you're okay…” he finally breathes when Taekwoon finally leaves his mouth to kiss the hollow under his jaw, bury his long pianist fingers into his hair when Hongbin wants then elsewhere entirely.

But practically thinking, ing in here would be terrible, the lack of proper lubrication would be hell. “I'm sorry...”

“Don't be. Don't be just stay safe… That's all I want.” Taekwoon gives him such a meaningful look he feels the absolute necessity of ruining everything arise and win his inner battle quite fast. “That and some occasional that is.”

Taekwoon smiles then, because he thinks Hongbin's funny when but in all honesty he's just desperately nervous. “Can it be more than just occasional though?”

“What… do you mean?”

“Can I take you out every day?”

“To have ? Not sure I can handle that. Not complaining but–”

“Not just , Kong.” Hongbin falls completely silent, he is actually quite sure he isn't even breathing. “I want to take you out to dinner, to go to the market buy stupid looking bracelets made of seashells, have coffee and eat some cake and buy shoes… every day stuff. But can I?”

“Like… a date?”

“If you want to call it that way.”

“Yes. Yes, you can do that…”

“Good. That's… that's good.” He smiles but Hongbin doesn't smile with him, in fact he wants to cry just a little. He's still terrified, that didn't change, he doubts it will change someday, but Taekwoon… Taekwoon wants to go on a date.

He's such a gentle soul, such a relief to have him around when he's… Like this. “I should take you home.”

“You should take me to bed that's what you should do.”

“Can’t bear staying dressed in my presence?”

“It's harder than it looks... If you make a joke I swear to God I'm leaving.” Taekwoon laughs, arms dragging Hongbin closer and against the side of the car harder, skinny jeans and sneakers and a hoodie, as it's usual of him, making Taekwoon look ten years older.

“I wasn't even thinking about it, Kong.” Taekwoon scoffs an embarrassed smile and Hongbin carefully cups his cheeks. “That's all you.” Tiny kisses he presses into Taekwoon's bruises, to urge them to heal faster. “Do you want me to take you home… my home?”

Usually he does not venture into any expectations regarding this kind of thing. Being taken home is such a great deal on Hongbin's eyes. “You… You sure?”

“If you want.” Taekwoon gives him a little smile.

“I do.”

It’s so weird, to stumble his way into Taekwoon's house, not a cheap hotel somewhere… Very few times Hongbin had been in this headspace, and never had he been so willing to be here. Because there's no word to describe what's happening between them and if this is still going on even now they are no longer in the Nautilus then Hongbin should stop but he isn't.

And he won't.

And when Taekwoon presses him to the door and the texture digs into his flesh he is completely fine with it. They are -mindfully and painfully- on the same