When I woke up, I was surprised to find Yerin in the kitchen preparing breakfast. It was the first time someone was up before me. As I carefully disassembled my makeshift bed, I asked her almost whispering if they had a schedule I was not made aware of.

“Not until 3 in the afternoon.” She spoke in flawless Korean as she alternately shifted her attention between me and the omelet she was skillfully flipping in the air without causing a splatter.

“Yah!” She knew I was protesting against her talking to me in their language.

“They’re way too tired to be up at this time, eonnie.” She gave a heartless chuckle as she went back to the potatoes she was dicing. Yerin-ah, you’re going to render me jobless if anyone finds out. I answered her with a sigh.

“My eyes were swollen from last night, so I decided I should not stay laying down.” She replied using English words in a succession more scrambled than the eggs she was cooking. I prevented myself from smiling and said ‘thank you.’ “Not even your clam soup helped with my eyes.” She obviously knew clams have some natural diuretic [causing one to urinate more] properties.

“Next time, you can add more celeries.” She winked as she boasted about her knowledge in cooking.

What a show-off beagle. I smirked as I folded my blanket and returned it to the sliding closet that was unstylishly situated in their living room. I would have been finished decluttering my sleeping space in a nanosecond but I chose to do it in a more humanly fashion as possible. For even if I revealed my identity to the cooking damsel in distress, I left out important details that I felt were not entirely irrelevant, but were dangerous for her to know. The speeding, teleportation and the gruesome murders, I kept to myself.

“Did you say something?” Yerin turned her head with her forehead wrinkled. What? Now you can hear the words in my head?? I froze for a second trying to recall if I actually made a sound.

“Eonnie…” Eunha uttered before she bellowed in disbelief after noticing Yerin in the kitchen. “Heol! This is the first time someone woke up before you!” She was looking at me with a thrilled quizzical look. I was relieved to know it was actually another human’s voice that she heard. Whew!

“Oh, I was…” I was about to invent an excuse before Yerin interrupted.

“Joon-eonnie was actually up before me but I told her I wanted to cook breakfast today. I have to practice again, you know. My skills are becoming rusty after our Joonie here started working wonders in the kitchen.” She winked at me discreetly signaling that she had my back. Did she just seriously call me Joonie? I glared at her half cringing as my retaliation to her cutesy name for me.

“Oh I thought…” Eunha whimsically pouted before erupting into a chuckle after seeing my reaction to the aegyo-fied name I was called with. “Haha! Did you just see her face?” Still amused at our brief awkward interaction.

“I’m cooking omelet. How do you like yours?” Yerin asked diverting the younger member’s attention while trying to hide her eyes.

“Whichever way you want it eonnie.” Giving the cook a light pat on the back denoting that she need not hide the pain that left an evident trace on her face. A few moments after, the girls got out of their rooms one-by-one and trailed their way toward the smell of Yerin’s inviting dish.

“Ah you’re up too!” Eunha exclaimed while passing the forks to them.

“Woah… it’s the first time in a long time you cooked again.” That was Yuna who half-sang her words before returning immediately to her early morning ritual of vocalizing. She did that with much gusto as she moved around waking the other girls up completely.

“Wah gaeranmari?” Yewon, who always liked eggs in any dish, dashed closer to Yerin who is almost ready to clean up.

“Yes Yewonnnnniiieeee… Do you want eonnie to cook something else for you?” She eagerly pinched her cheeks causing the young maknae to be startled by the sudden change in the mood of Yerin who they worried about since a few days ago.

Sowon stood behind them observing her roommate’s unexpected uplifted aura. She darted her eyes across the room searching for signs of my presence until she found me on the other end pretending to tidy up the already neat living area. She gave me a questioning look while she pointed to the busy Yerin using her pursed pink lips. I shrugged my shoulders as I watched the other girls gawk at the omelet, ensuring no one was seeing our wordless exchange.

Being the leader that she naturally is, she could not let these kinds of things, such as what Yerin is going through, just pass without doing a thing. While it was true that she did not want to intervene, she just did not want them to see her do it personally. As the head of the group, she went through a more rigorous psychological training that her other members did not have to attend. These made her realize that her influence in them can be a double-edged sword. Her words are strong enough to sway a situation frantically to either end, like a pendulum out of control, if uttered irresponsibly. Although it did not always appear on TV, as they intentionally wanted to happen, the other members respected their leader so much that they are willing to put their lives in her hands.

Several days ago, like Yerin, Sowon came to me for my advice. Unlike other members, she was immune to the distance I kept putting between me and the group. It did not matter to her that I was a ‘staff,’ she treated me as if I was part of their household. She was not physically affectionate because I was obviously not receptive of such gestures, but she spoke to me openly like we knew each other for a long time. Even when she could not express herself well, she did not give up a single conversation. I hypothesized from her actions that maybe my presence was an air of relief since there was someone older she can finally depend on for the simple non-idol-related issues.

Until my conversation with Yerin the previous night, I kept my vow of not becoming involved in some personal matters. I listened to Sowon’s concerns about the public slowly noticing a change in the dynamics of the group. She intentionally left out the details about the heartbreak of Yerin, believing it was not her story to tell and that the younger girl would eventually turn to me for my assistance anyway. I just listened to her and gave her my objective opinion of the issue. We could not settle on anything since the whole story was not divulged to me until last night.

One of the rooms opened as Sinb lazily walked toward the sofa trying to wake herself up. I could sense Yerin’s elation seeing the other girl finally come out of the room. She cooks for everyone but she particularly makes her dishes extra special because she wanted to impress her somehow. From 50 feet away, I could hear her heartbeats reverberate in a delighted frenzy.

“Si…” I could see she was about to invite her to eat when I looked at her direction clearing my throat to stop her from making a mistake.

“Si… ganeul dallyeoseo… Eoreuni doel… suman itdamyeon…” She blurted out into a song oddly missing a tune or two as her face quivered in obvious awkward embarrassment.

Sowon almost face-palmed seeing the struggle in Yerin’s face while I lowered my head biting my lips preventing myself from laughing so hard. I held the sides of my forehead in my attempt to hide my face while shaking my head in disbelief.

“Yah! This is why Yuna vocalizes every day so she won’t sing our songs the way you do!” Sowon was quick to save the out-of-tune-Yerin from sinking further into the ground. The other girls started laughing as they continued to enjoy the tasty breakfast.

“What did you cook?” Sinb absentmindedly asked, unaware of who prepared the meal, as she was making her way into the kitchen.

“Yah! Isn’t that too much to say for someone who sings only a few lines?!” Yerin quick-wittedly strike back at the leader who laughed the loudest. She heard Sinb’s question but proceeded to annoy the long-legged leader instead

“Yah! Yah! Yah! Jung Yerin, how dare you! Wait for me to show my rapping skills! Prepare yourself to fall in love!” Sowon never lets herself be defeated in these kinds of argumentation. Eunha, who was enjoying the scene the most, jokingly gestured that she wanted to vomit after hearing the leader’s proclamation.

The two eldest started lightly punching each other until they were suddenly glued in a comforting hug. It was evident in Sowon’s embrace that she was happy to see her roommate in that state again. They looked at each other before they smiled at me almost synchronously. Without words, we knew we’ve already started with the plan.

“Yerin-eonnie made omelet and herbed potatoes. Here, it’s really good!” Yewon replied to the other maknae while handing her a fork. That’s when Sinb realized that Yerin ignored her question. Good job Yerin-ah.