“Excuse me, I need to use the washroom.” Sinb exited the room without acknowledging the permission from the two directors who continued explaining the proceedings of the show. Yewon exchanged glances with Joon who then promptly pretended to receive a call.

“Hello? I’m in a meeting.” Joon whispered covering as she stood up holding her phone to her ear and motioned to the manager that she had to take the call.  She followed Sinb to the washroom albeit she knew she might not find her there.

“Sinb-yah! Wait for me.” Joon dashed, almost hyperspeeding to the direction of the young girl who did not care to look back.

The girl stopped at the entrance of a narrow passageway that led to an emergency exit and rested her back against the wall. When Joon caught her, she was silent, contemplating and about to sob.

“Don’t let those tears fall.” Joon demanded her in Korean making the girl flinch with what seemed like a sudden domineering tone in her companion. “Sinb-yah, I’m not going to ask because I know what’s on your mind. But you have to pull yourself together and go back there. It’s just a show.”

“Eonnie, I know I wanted to forget about what I feel. But is it not too much if it happened this way?!” She replied not minding which language she used. “And it’s not just a show! I have to see all that’s going to happen and I’ll even be a part of it. I know how it goes, we come and visit her to support her, help her cook, chaperone her to dates, help her surprise the husband… You’ve watched that show! I don’t need to explain it to you!” There was a sudden shift in the younger girl’s temper that did not surprise Joon. Sinb has the tendency to be impulsive with her reactions which often divided their fans’ opinion of her attitude to the point of being criticized for not being mindful of the resulting behavior.

“Hey!” Joon yelled at the girl trying to jolt her out of her depressive reverie. “I know you feel a lot of emotions right now, but this is not the right time to sort them out. There is still a photoshoot and you cannot show up there in this state.” The foreigner was very straightforward, almost emotionless as she tried to convince the girl. Fixated on the unresolved investigation, at the back of her mind she had a million things that troubled her about the company’s sudden determination. Yerin’s participation in the show will certainly isolate her more during filming and her separation from the entire group amplifies her susceptibility to be in danger since she will mostly be at different locations. Joon knew that soon she will be receiving her own briefing regarding a change in security strategy, but until then she will not fully comprehend the seemingly hasty decision of the group’s company.

After a few deep breaths, the distraught Sinb went back to room and Joon followed her inside after a minute. The meeting, like promised by the directors was short. Yerin and Sowon were both in daze and inattentive throughout the briefing and kept staring at the folder somehow hoping that they just misread what was written. The discussion continued for a mere fifteen minutes and the girls were already on their way to the practice room for a quick lunch.

“I don’t think I understood a single word from that meeting.” Yerin spoke while swirling her folk through the chicken salad she could not make herself eat.

“I don’t think I did either. I was just thinking about how you felt about it. Will you be okay?” Sowon was genuinely concern of how the other girl would handle being in a show that she explicitly objected joining even during their trainee days.

“You know I’ve never wanted to join in that make-believe show.” Yerin was regarded by their fans as the most reserved of the members though she was the most physically affectionate. She never expressed fondness in concepts that were mature even when she came of age, and so compelling her to partake in such a show is making her go against her will. “What more now, eonnie?”

“I know. Something does not feel right about it.” Sowon was looking at the other members who ate silently and visibly apprehensive about how to react to the unexpected announcement. It’s usual for the girls to discuss matters but it seemed like everyone was cautious about bringing up a conversation about the event earlier. The excitement that started the day before was hardly noticeable now, if not totally gone.

“It’s not like anything will actually change. But like what the other director said, our group dynamics on-stage will slightly become different to help make the marriage more convincing.” Even the sound of her saying the word sent unwanted shivers down her spine. “I cannot even say the word out loud eonnie, it makes me nauseated.”

“I don’t know if this was planned thoroughly but I don’t feel comfortable about you being there.” Sowon stopped Yerin from tossing the already over-mixed salad and signaled her to eat. Yerin gave out a sigh before she briskly looked at Sinb who incidentally was also looking at her.

“Uhhh… Are you done eating?” Yerin yelled a thoughtless question to conceal her surprise and evade the possible awkwardness. The girl nodded though she obviously has not touched her food. “Uhhmm… Did you see Joon-eonnie?”

“She went to the company clinic with manager. I think manager’s foot is painful again. Eonnie, did they say who you will be married to?” Sinb was faking a teasing smile.

“They did not tell. They said it will be best to capture the actual reaction during the filming.” Yerin forced an eye smile and ended the conversation as she turned her head to Sowon. “Yeah, to film the actual grief and sadness.” She muttered to the older girl.

“I don’t think you have any choice. So, better start setting your mind on being part of that show.”

“You know it’s not about the show, eonnie.” Yerin finally threw the container of the heavily battered salad into the trash bag behind her.

“Then what is it about? That beagle you were talking to? I thought we’ve already settled that issue.”

“We did.” She sighed again but now with hint of helplessness in her face. “But during the meeting, I don’t know why a feeling kept on creeping up on me. Eonnie, it may sound exaggerated, but being in that show… felt like some sort of cheating.” Yerin could not find the right words to explain her hesitation. “I don’t know how to describe it.”

“No, I get you. It’s more of cheating on yourself, I mean on what you feel. I would feel the same if I was in your shoes.” Sowon sounded as if she quite related to Yerin’s situation.

“It’s like you like someone already and then your parents introduce you to someone else…”

“Yeah, and then you are forced to show the world that you like him…”

“Yes, and show it on national TV!” Sowon and Yerin sighed after completing each other’s sentences. “And on top of that, although it’s fake, I will forever be tagged as someone who was married to that person. I don’t know if I can live with that… and then having her beside me all the time. It has not even begun but just thinking about it feels weird.”

“It’s only now that I thought of that. You’re right, your name will be tied to that guy even after the show is long finished.” Sowon felt the weight of the younger member’s concern.

Before their conversation could continue, Joon half-opened the practice room door to inform the girls and the staff that they were leaving in five minutes. She left immediately after her announcement to go to the service van.

“I would have wanted to join WGM… Just to see your reaction.” Sowon mumbled to herself while she stared at the door that Joon closed.

“I heard that!” Yerin poked the girl’s waist. “Here, give this to her. It’s her lunch. She’s busy to even get the chance to eat. For sure she’ll be waiting in the van again so we better hurry down.”

“For an English tutor, she’s just way too busy.” Sowon uttered in mixed disappointment and curiosity.

“Yah, remember she’s more like an all-around person to us.” Yerin tried to ease her impending suspicion.

“I know. But you can tell she’s too intelligent to be doing that job.”

“Well, doesn’t she have to be smart to take care of six people? We can be hard to handle sometimes, you know.” Yerin replied aiming to make the conversation lighter.

“Yeah, too intelligent to like me.” Sowon uttered as she lowered her head while clutching the paper bag she held tighter.

“Eonnie! You’re being too dramatic because of the variety show. You’re forgetting that I’m the one joining, not you! You want me to go to the CEO and switch places with you?” Yerin started walking away from the leader with her infamous gangster gait.

“How can you get married if you walked that way?!” Sowon returned the bickering.

“Well they should have thought about that before they decided to make me join!” Yerin signaled everyone to start heading out.

---

The manager drove to the location after insisting he could handle the pain on his leg, which he has been feeling all week. It was an hour and a half drive and it was evident in his face that he was just enduring it.

“Seatbelts!” Joon yelled after seeing everyone settle in their seats.

“For someone who was injured after rolling out of her seat, she’s too concerned about other people. She’s making me like her more, it’s annoying.” Sowon shook her head and looked at Yerin who just smiled at her.

“Aish! After seeing what happened to you, how could you still trust these seatbelts?!” Sinb exclaimed irritably, again not being mindful of the language but the foreigner replied since it was obvious in the girl’s tone what her message was.

“If not for that seatbelt, I would have flown out of the windshield and I wouldn’t be sitting here with you. So put your seatbelt on if you don’t want me to tie you down in that chair.” Joon spoke so fast that most of them did not get the details of her statement but it was clear that she pointed out something of grave importance. She repeated it slowly but this time jokingly after realizing the heavy air with which she scolded Sinb.

It was showing that Joon was becoming more worried as she kept contemplating on the short conference that transpired that morning. She has repeatedly checked her phone for instructions from her agency but has not received any, which was not uncommon since her training geared her toward resolving situations by herself. If she does not get orders from her superiors soon, she will have to plan on her own and she has barely two weeks before the final briefing that will immediately be followed by the initial recording of the show. She tried to shrug off the worry as she diverted the girls’ attention to a light conversation carefully avoiding the topic about any show. After a few minutes, she convinced them to rest as the photoshoot was expected to last several hours. The rest of the passengers fell quiet and everyone except Sinb and Joon wore earphones to soothe themselves

“Are you better now?” Joon asked her seatmate making sure she was the only one hearing it. Both did not mind Eunha since she almost always dozed off in the car no matter the distance of the journey.

“No.” She said instantaneously. “It feels like there is something stuck in my throat and it went too deep it’s piercing my heart.” Sinb replied in Korean but afterwards tried to explain in English that she had to mime some of the words to get the message through. It was evident however that she was calmer and ready to have a more sensible dialogue.

“So, what’s your plan?” Joon was implying that something should be done.

“Nothing. As if I can stop the CEO from making her or anyone of us join.” Her words were jumbled but the message was clear as daylight.

“Do you think you can handle seeing her being sweet to someone else?” Joon was not teasing, she asked her sincerely.

“I’m not sure until I see it.” Sinb’s answer made the foreigner raise an eyebrow momentarily in absolute skepticism.

“Can you handle seeing her be a girlfriend to someone?” Although Joon knew that they have never spoken about any possibility or even the imagination of the two being together, the question seemed appropriate for her to ask.

“It’s not true anyway, so maybe.”

“So, you can handle seeing her be a wife to someone?”

“It’s not even a real marriage.” Sinb was now swallowing the words she spoke earlier when she walked out the conference room.

“Can you handle seeing her hugging someone else? Holding someone else? Possibly kissing someone else?” Joon kept a humorless demeanor while she asked her about more vivid scenarios. “You couldn’t even handle her calling me, being close to me, receiving flowers from me, hugging me, talking to me…”

“Huuuuuuurgh!” The young girl grimaced as she listened to Joon, evident that the temper earlier has returned. “Stop it eonnie, it makes me imagine really revolting things. You know what I feel even if I deny it.” Joon pretended to not understand her Korean sentence completely and just kept mum.

The rest of the journey became quiet for the two. In Joon’s mind was a battle that kept going in circles. She kept on refocusing herself to the more pressing concerns about the group’s safety, deliberating on a sound strategy she can employ before the security detail under her command would ask for future directives. She was caught up with the many things she had to organize in her head. But she could not make herself ignore the two ladies who she knew felt the same for each other, especially when Sinb laid her head on her shoulder without the intention of sleeping; it was something she has never done before. Joon was aware that this gesture was the young girl’s subtle attempt to ask for help or possibly comfort. It was undeniable that not even the girl’s headstrong personality can help her surpass the effects of the forthcoming change without having to suffer.

“Wouldn’t it be nice if you just laid your head on her shoulder?” Joon whispered to the girl who kept blankly staring at the car floor.

“I’m starting to think that you and Yewon came from the same planet.” Without lifting her head, Sinb recalled how the witty maknae phrased her opinion over the same matter.

“Then you have to start believing that our planet is great.” Joon replied as she took her phone out to send a text.

JN: Yewon-ah, you should talk to her when you get the chance.

UJ: I was going to tell you the same eonnie, but I guess you already did.

JN: I did but I think it will help if you did too.

UJ: I will approach her during the time lag of the shoot.

JN: Kamsahaeyo, Yewon-ah.

UJ: No, thank YOU, eonnie. 

>>>

The CF photoshoot took longer to start because of the incorrect lighting equipment that were brought to the location. Joon was mostly on her phone but stayed in the waiting area tent where all the girls were being prepared; she did not want any of them to be out of her sight in spite the presence of security personnel that were scattered within the perimeter.

Sowon was first to be called by the photographer who they were already familiar with. After the leader stood up to receive directions from the staff, Yerin took the chance to approach Joon to sit beside her.

“Eonnie, I was just thinking about it now. Did you come from a different planet or something?” The girl’s face was filled with genuine interest.

“Whaaaat?!” The foreigner sneered but was surprised by the question since Sinb's allegation earlier about her coming from a different astronomical body was still fresh in her mind.

“No, I mean because you can do some things that we can’t.” Yerin was careful not to be heard by others.

“Like I’m an alien?!” Joon scowled slightly before giving the girl an unfriendly pat.

“I was even thinking maybe you weren’t even human.” She discreetly giggled.

“What now? I’m a robot?! Yerin-ah, you’re imagination seriously needs some fine tuning. Where is all this coming from??”

“No, because I was just thinking why you never showed interest in Sowon-eonnie even if it’s obvious that you two can get along really well. So I thought you were trying to avoid being close to her because maybe you were not, you know… entirely like us.” The young girl was biting her lips to prevent an explosion of laughter. “Especially that you’ve seen everything anyway, so why be distant?”

“YAAAAAH!” Joon yelped too loud that all the girls and the staff, including the photographer looked at her direction perplexed. “Joesonghamnida…” She winced and elaborately bowed in apology a few times. “Yah! To be clear, one, I’m not an extraterrestrial nor an android, I’m human with some genetic flaw. Two, I did not see everything. I know my vision is way too sharp but in a nanosecond my gaze was already away from her. Three, it’s not being distant, it’s being professional.” She spoke in a very low tone but with extreme certitude.

“Does that mean you’ve taken interest in her but you are just being professionally aloof?” Yerin was persistent to get at least a clue of how her older friend thought of Sowon who was in front of them striking a ladylike pose.

“You’re not going to stop, are you?”

“Not until I get a piece of your mind.”

“Yerin-ah, I did not want us to talk about this but… you know the circumstances of my job, right? After a few months, I will not be here. I cannot afford to build that kind of connection not only with her, but with anyone.” Joon explained after she let out a heavy sigh.

“But there’s a few months to maybe make her happy at least.” Yerin’s mood changed as she remembered the culmination of the other girl’s mission on her birthday.

“Yah! You should tell that to yourself. For someone who has years of being with the person you like, yet you don’t want to take risk?? And now you’re telling me I have a few months?” Joon was quick to divert the argument.

“Don’t even remind me, eonnie. That WGM thing is already causing me so much confusion. There’s already a commotion going on in my head.”

“Maybe you meant in your heart?” Joon threw her a glare. Before Yerin could counter the remark, she was called by the director to come up the photoshoot area.

---

“What were you talking about? You screamed, it was funny.” Sowon was smiling as she took Yerin’s seat beside Joon.

“We were talking about Sinb.” She warmly smiled back as she was reminded of the conversation earlier about her being aloof. “I think you need to talk to her. She seemed too affected by the variety show. I could see the possibility of her having a great deal of unease when she starts filming. It’s really off her character to be joining that show and having that personal conflict at hand is going to make it more difficult for her.”

Sowon did not respond in spite the foreigner’s very slow and clear enunciation of her words. She was just staring motionless at the seatmate who went on talking.

“Sowon-ah? Are you listening?” Joon snapped her fingers near the girl’s face.

“Ah! Yes.” Flashing a nervous smile. “I am listening. I was just… you smiled at me. You don’t smile a lot.” Sowon uttered bashfully keeping her head low.

“Ahhh… Don’t worry I’ll try… to smile more.” Joon’s face turned completely red when she saw Yerin teasingly grinning at her as she observed their interaction. She immediately covered her face pretending to massage her forehead.

“I will talk to Yerin when we get home. She is confused but what do you think we should do?” The taller lady asked very discreetly still avoiding eye contact with Joon.

“It’s obvious that her feelings did not change. She should make a decision before it’s too late for her. And she better stick to it, no more going back and forth like how she does now.”

“Yes, maybe the show made her change her mind again. We will talk about it later for sure.”

---

“Yewon-ah.” Yewon did not have to approach Sinb so they could talk. The older maknae seemed heavily burdened that she took the initiative to talk to her original confidante. “I was talking to you-know-who earlier and she said a ton load of stuff that made me realize some things, things I’m afraid I won’t be able to handle.”

“Things like what?” Yewon was intelligent enough to know what might have been the circumstances Sinb was pertaining to, but she chose to let her eonnie vent out.

“Yah, you know them already. The things that they will do for the show.” The girl was already frowning and irritated that she had to recall all the physical contact that Joon pointed out earlier. “The dates, the hugging, the holding, the k… Yah! you already know!” Sinb was restlessly jerking her legs in anxiety while she spoke distractedly.

The younger girl beckoned her to be quiet. “Ah… are you saying you can’t take it to see her having skinship [physical contact] with another person?”

The other girl just moped and refrained herself from agreeing.

“Come to think of it, whoever the guy would be, even though it’s just for the show, he will be Yerin-eonnie’s first.” Yewon carelessly insinuated. “And they will have to live together at some point, right? Sleeping in one bed, sometimes hugging or holding hands.” She continued.

“Kim Yewon!” The restless jerking grew more intense and her face was more angry than annoyed.

“And not only that, even after the episodes, eonnie will always be identified to have been married to that guy.” She added in a rather savage manner.

“Aiiiiiish…! The two of you are not helping!”

“But what kind of help do you want from us? To make you believe that everything will be alright? I’ll bet on my life that you have been telling yourself that the very moment you knew about her joining, but you could not convince yourself that’s why you came to us.” Yewon was never the type who will beat around the bush, she’ll just hit you straight where it hurts.

“But…” Sinb’s eyes were starting to form tears.

“Stop! Don’t cry.” Yewon lightly pinched the other girl’s arm to redirect her attention.

“Aww… It’s like I’m hearing Joon-eonnie all over again. You two really came from the same weird planet!” She was now out from her desolate mood and back to her ill-tempered bearing.

“Yeah and it’s probably the planet of the most logical people. Eonnie, what I’m saying is, just let it all out. Just tell her, so you won’t have regrets. Even if she rejects it, what more can you lose? She’ll be joining the show either way and that means it will be awkward whatever the outcome will be. But the difference is, you got it all out of your chest.” The younger girl seeing Sinb lower her head in thoughts knew that what she said glaringly struck her and that she was about to make a pivotal decision. She quickly held her in a tight embrace and whispered “We’ll help you. Just tell us when you’re ready. Don’t turn your back on her.”

>>>

She was always the snobbish and overbearing type but she never had the audacity to make the first move, or any move for that matter. But her worries are crippling her pride. She had to confirm something before she could finally make up her mind.

“Yerin-eonnie, I don’t want to use my neck pillow today. I need you.” Sinb said hastily while dragging the older girl before she could properly situate herself on her seat in the van.

Sowon who was closing the door turned her head quickly to the voice.

“I mean I need your shoulder!” Realizing that what she said was too cheesy for her personality, she clarified. “Joon-eonnie drives better than manager. You will be okay.” She added.

Yerin, who was caught by obvious surprise, did not have a second to protest. Her tired, and now possibly trembling legs, just sprang up in submission. Almost stumbling her way to the back end, she followed the girl who did not let go of her hand.

The other girls did not pay attention to what was happening, except for the leader and the maknae who were smiling to themselves as they listened to the stammering Sinb whose words sounded rehearsed.

Sinb went to her spot and had her eonnie sit at the middle. After motioning the still stunned Yerin to put her seatbelt on, she took her trusty blanket to cover them both and she started to find her way onto her shoulder. The young Eunbi did all that while keeping an unreadable expression but never letting go of the other’s hand.

Yerin did not utter a single word. It was obvious in her face that she was flustered but definitely ecstatic about this unusual occurrence. I looked at her through the rearview mirror and gave her a wink. She smiled back biting her lips trying her hardest to prevent herself from giggling. Her eyes were almost invisible as they sank behind her blushing cheeks, trying to control herself from jumping about. I gestured her to lean her head against her seatmate’s and start resting too.

Oh what a happy lovesick duck. Hearing all the seatbelts have been secured, I looked at the manager who sat on the passenger seat if we were good to go ahead. He nodded feebly as he secured the position of his now slightly swollen right leg before thanking me for driving back to the apartment. I put on the music and started to head home. From my seat, I could hear the smitten duck’s heartbeats racing.

Calm the heck down or you’ll wake her up. But I was more than certain, the younger girl was not asleep at all as I could hear her heartbeats rise faster than Yerin’s.