Come close to me.

Listen to the sound of my beating heart

The way it pounds when you are close

The way it stops when you touch me

Don't you know

That I can only see you?

Like this, it seems I’ve gone past the point of liking you

                                                                            -Excerpt from JongHyun’s lyric notebook

I came to consciousness slowly, my mind registering the comfortably warm weight of a woman in my arms. Noelle was pressed against me tightly, her back molded against my chest. I loved the way she seemed to belong next to me and I let out a low chuckle because I knew her current position had more to do with me than with her own wishes. During the longest hours of the night I always seemed to reach for Noelle and bring her to me, unable to be apart even in sleep, unable to let go of the girl who had become the most important person in my life. With her snuggled closed to me, for the first time since I was a child I had been able to experience consecutive nights of uninterrupted sleep. The peace that she brought to me both mentally and physically was beyond simple words. And here she lay still sleeping, her thick curls fanned out across my arm and her pillow, the satin pillowcase she rested on one that she'd brought to my house to protect her hair. The glossy fabric smelled lightly of the oils she used to ‘keep her curls alive’ as she liked to say. Many such items now littered my house, and a portion of my closet was sectioned off for Noelle's use. And I had never been happier to have a roommate.

Waking up with a girl next to me every morning was a brand-new experience for me but somehow it's strangely familiar. Being in a steady relationship without any fear is just as bizarre but Noelle makes everything so natural and easy between us. Two weeks have gone by since my confession and Noelle's acceptance of my feelings, but our first night together was burned forever into my memory. It would pop up at odd times during the day; one minute I would be in the middle of composing and suddenly the passionate way Noelle had cried out my name in release would echo in my ears. Or I would be cooking dinner and instead of the curry that I was making for Noelle, the way her lips looked after I’d kissed them thoroughly would be at the forefront of my mind. Consequently, during those first few days together we barely left the apartment unless we had to and I eagerly awaited Noelle’s return home each night from work.

As I take in her sleeping form across from me, I see that her eyes are shut tight against the sunlight flooding in through the window and is opened slightly causing little snores to escape. I hold back my laugh and begin my daily morning struggle of untangling our limbs without waking her up. Luckily for me I've had tons of practice with TaeMin who gets ten times clingier when he's asleep even though he tries to act so manly when he's awake. I can’t help but laugh and then grimace at the memories, the thoughts of my members sending a pulse of pain through me. I miss the boys who are as close to me as brothers and I come to a decision as I head to the bathroom.

I've spent enough time running away from my family, away from the people who love me. It almost seems as if I was hiding from their happiness, afraid that I would stay forever alone while trapped in my darkness. But Noelle has changed all of that; I can see the truth again and the only thing I want is to be with everyone and share my joy with them. A trip back to Korea is in order and I send a quick text to KiBum, sure that he'll be in the mood for a Christmas party. I manage to get in a quick shower and I’m just finishing up brushing my teeth when I get an alert. I smile when I see the ID pop up on the screen and swipe the phone to answer the FaceTime call.

“Hyung, you want to throw a party?” KiBum starts without preamble. “I feel like a proud mother; finally, my son is embracing the need to be around other people instead of staying holed up in in his dark room!”

“You’re overdoing it again. Besides my room isn’t that dark,” I grouch at him. “I have candles all over the place.” As usual our conversation can’t start off with a typical hello, that would be too much for KiBum whose exuberance can be felt even through the phone.

“As if that makes it any better,” KiBum scoffs, ruffling his hair into place as he watches his own face in the chat instead of mine. “You’re like the Phantom of the Opera in his sewers.”

“Firstly, the Phantom was a badass and no way should he have lost to that other guy. And secondly, I think we should hold a party. Christmas is coming up and I want to do something with all of you. Plus, I know you and Aliah were expecting to finally find out the of the baby. Wouldn’t it be fun if we combined the two?”

“That is a good idea,” KiBum said with a sparkle in his eyes as a wide smile fills his face. “I’ve seen those revealing parties on TV. We can cut into a cake and the inside will blue or pink depending on the baby we’re having.”

“That sounds like-”

“We just moved out into the Daegu house,” KiBum continues and cuts me off as if we weren’t supposed to be having a conversation. "We can move the couches over a bit and get a huge Christmas tree, add some decorations and lots of Christmas music…”

“And I want a rematch of norebang!” I cut in before Bummie can get too far into his plans. “That machine is rigged so I want a brand new one this time, got it?”

“You’re just as competitive as Minho when it comes to singing. Just admit defeat already, we’ve been doing this for years and you haven’t managed to beat me and Aliah yet.”

“Well this time I won’t be singing alone,” I tell him feeling a huge amount of pleasure. For the first time in what felt like forever I wouldn’t be alone.

“Who are you bringing to such a private party?”

“Noelle, if it’s ok with you and Aliah. I want her to be there to meet all of you.”

“JongHyun, I’m so happy for you! I knew you could do it. And of course she’s welcome; Aliah will be ecstatic that she’ll have another girl to talk to. She says that when we start talking all at once she gets a massive headache.”

“You should be glad Aliah hasn’t left you yet, with all the pranks that you pull on her, never mind us talking too much. I remember when she called me because you’d drawn on her face while she was sleeping.”

“I remember that, she was so pissed but the making up part was even better,” KiBum said as he gave me a lascivious wink and grin. "I’ve been so good lately since we found out about the baby. No sudden attacks or surprises anymore, I don’t want to stress her out. Although I am feeling the itch to be a little mean. Maybe I’ll take it out on you guys when you all get here.”

We both laughed because the truth was when we were all together we could get a little obnoxious. Hopefully with Noelle there, Aliah wouldn’t feel like pulling out her hair.

“Speaking of women leaving us for bad behavior, you’re planning on having Noelle meet your mother, aren’t you?” KiBum inquired.

“How did you know? I didn’t even know myself until this morning.”

“You’re very predictable Hyung; if we’re meeting her then so is your mother. Besides you’re an eomma’s boy.”

“If I am so what? My mom is great, she’ll love Noelle,” I defended, feeling a little put out. What was the big deal about loving your mother?

“I’m sure she will, we’ll all probably like her. But don’t make this a surprise for either one of them, if you do it’s sure to lead to disaster. Meeting a potential in-law is nerve-wrecking at the best of times, if you don’t tell her your plans she’ll definitely hate you for a while.”

“I had thought to make it a surprise, but maybe you’re right. Noelle wouldn’t hate me but she has a wicked punch. You know how fragile I am.”

“No one cares about your fragile body! I’m hanging up, I’ve got a party to plan.”

“Thanks Kibum, see you soon.” As I ended the call, I walked back into the bedroom and watched Noelle as she slowly pulled herself out of sleep. The languid way she stretched on the bed made me want to take her right then and there, but I had other plans for today than just spending it in bed. Kissing Noelle on the forehead as I passed, I threw on some sweats and went downstairs to cook our breakfast.

Noelle walked around my kitchen, clearing away the dishes that we'd just finished eating for breakfast. I watched her as she moved, the way she tucked her loose curls behind her ear, the way she scrunched up her nose when she rinsed off the dishes to put them in the dishwasher. She was at ease here and by the expressions on her face she hid nothing. I breathed a sigh of relief at the thought. I honestly never wanted her to go. And now we be the perfect time to bring up our potential trip together.

“You've got the day off right? You've been busy lately.” I start off innocently.

“I know. Working double shifts is exhausting but the hospital fired like ten nurses in my department in these past few weeks.”

“Really? What happened?” I ask genuinely curious.

“They were selling drugs from the pharmacy to some of the gangs in the area.”

“Are you kidding?”

“No unfortunately. It's more common than you'd think. Anyway, it leaves the rest of us to suffer.”

“Noelle, I know the holidays are a busy time at the hospital, but do you think you could arrange for some time off?”

“Well sure, I mean I never take my vacations anyway. But I’d sort of assumed you’d be going back to Korea to visit family.”

Noelle bent down low to close the dishwasher and set the cycle and my train of thought shattered. Just when had she bought those jeans? My hands flexed and clenched, my body hardening in response to images I was barely even aware I was conjuring. My mind was on overdrive as I watched Noelle move around my space, touching my things. Possessiveness filled me when I thought of her going back to her own place; I wanted her here with me all the time. With a force of will I hadn’t been sure I had, I brought our conversation back to the forefront of my mind.

“I was but I wanted you to come with me. I want you to meet my friends, my mother and sister.” Noelle shifted her eyes away from me nervously, her hands twisting the towel she held in her hands.

“Already? Are you sure? Meeting your friends and your parents, that’s kind of a big deal,” she mumbled.

“It is a big step but you’re special to me. I don’t want to keep our relationship a secret. I want to share your specialness with everyone.” I gave her my best grin full of teeth and her worried expression dropped into a smile.

“Does the cheesiness ever end with you?” She teased me.  

“No, not really.” I told her honestly, feeling good that I could turn her mood around so easily.

“Good to know,” she said with a roll of her eyes and a sigh.

“But I’m serious, you mean a lot to me. I know it’s not your favorite thing to do but my friends aren’t too bad and my mom will be nice to you, I promise. She knows I have good taste in women. Please?”

I reach for Noelle and she walks towards me and into my embrace. I squeeze her close and I feel her shake her head in the affirmative as she rests against my shoulder.

“Thank you for coming with me. I know you must be nervous after what happened with your ex but just know I won't let that happen to you again.” Noelle let out a small laugh and rubbed my nose with hers.  

“That’s the least of my worries. You are the antithesis of who he was; I trust you Jjong.”

My heart seemed to fill up all the empty space inside my chest at her words. That was all I needed to hear, that she trusted me to protect her. And I would do my very best because losing Noelle was the last thing on my mind.

Feeling even better that I had confirmed our holiday plans, I saw no reason not to go back to bed. And Noelle didn’t seem to have any qualms either as she led me upstairs to the bedroom. I admire the way she steps out of her clothes, the way she helps me out of mine. My hands tremble when I touch her and our hot kisses leave me breathless and too dazed to think. The soft feel of her skin under my fingertips, the way she curls around me when I pound into her is intoxicating. Her ragged breaths fuel me as much as my own desire and I felt a sheen of sweat break out across my forehead. I hit deep inside Noelle and her nails scratch at my arms leaving thin lines of pink in their wake.

Being with Noelle like this made me feel like I was about to burst wide open. It was the strangest sensation, something that went beyond simple ual pleasure. It felt as if something special was inside her and it was slowly working its way through my organ into me. I was so full, too full of everything that was Noelle. Her sweet and seducing sighs echoed in my ears as she fell apart around me. Unable to hold back any longer in the wake of her , I felt myself break apart as well and I crushed her hips to mine as I tried to make my last push count. I released into her, both of us shaking from the force of our . She laid her head on my chest and her curls tumbled over the arm I had put behind her head.

“Noelle?" I questioned as the hand she still had in my hair tugged playfully.

“Mmhmm, going to sleep now.” Her hand flexed in my hair once more before she let the strands go. She ran her foot once over my shin before snuggling down into my stomach to sleep.

I felt something shiver awake inside me then, something that was so gentle it was painful, something that awoke only for Noelle. Maybe it was the emotion called tenderness, but I suspected it was so much more. Running my hands up her side, I reveled in the feel of the small shocks that still shook her body. As I pulled her close in the aftermath of our lovemaking, I thought of what Noelle meant to me, how important she had become in such a short time. She was my everything and likewise I aimed to give Noelle all of me. Hollowed out and emptied from my soul to hers, I would take everything I was and lay it at her feet.

A/N: I'm late, sooooo freaking late and I know y'all hate me but ugh my life has been so messy lately and you guys I just hate mess! I had to get cleaned up and ready to face this romance on multiple fronts. But now I'm in a good place, I procrastinated long enough to soothe my laziness and we're back! Tell me how you guys liked this chapter, tell me what you think will happen next! You know Noelle had to meet the boys!! Remember to COMMENT, UPVOTE and SUBSCRIBE for more content! Much love, <3