NOVEMBER 2010. The morning breeze began to get cold than usual. People are starting to wear multiple clothes underneath their thick coats. Winter season is on the corner now.. and Nayeon is hating it.

Nayeon: Uhh..

Jungyeon: Uhh, what?

Nayeon: Can I sleep here tonight? Your room's alot warmer than mine.

Jungyeon: So you're going to leave Dahyun all night?

Nayeon: Nah, I bet Chaeyoung will fill up my presence tonight. Those two are harboring secrets from us already.

Jungyeon: Ya. They're growing up. That's part of it. (Laughs) You're keeping secrets from me nowadays too.

Nayeon: I'm not!

Jungyeon: Then why do you hang out with Mark more than me lately?

Nayeon: (Laughs) What? Why, are you jealous?

Jungyeon: Of course! He's snatching you away right before my eyes!

Nayeon: Ya. I'm not even complaining when Jae-oppa takes you away from me.

Nayeon was surprised by what she said. Jungyeon was shocked too.

Jungyeon: Are you... are you saying.. Mark and you are...

Nayeon: No.. No! That's not what I meant --

Jungyeon: But you compared your relationship with Mark to mine and Oppa's... Ya, Im Nayeon! Tell me the truth, are you and Mark-oppa dating now?

Nayeon: We're not, okay? It's not... He's not even.. I don't know..

Jungyeon: You're unbelievable! How dare you keep secrets from me!

That night, Nayeon can't sleep. She thought of texting Mark but she doesn't want to start the conversation. Jungyeon was sleeping soundly so she carefully went out of the room and went to the balcony. She wanted to appreciate the cold breeze but it's too cold for her liking. Suddenly she felt someone placed a coat on her back.

Jinyoung: Why are you out here? I thought you don't like the cold?

Nayeon: Jinyoung-ah. I mean, Oppa.

Jinyoung: You don't have to act surprised. You know I can't sleep well at night.

Nayeon: You're still taking pills?

Jinyoung: Sometimes..

Nayeon: You should get some sleep now. 

Jinyoung: I will.. but maybe later. Jungyeon?

Nayeon: Sleeping like a rock.

Jinyoung: (Laughs) You sleep like a rock too.

Nayeon: YA!!

Jinyoung: (Hushed) Why are yelling? (Laughs)

The truth is, Nayeon is happy that Jinyoung is actually talking to her now. She's not sure about it, maybe because he's busy lately with the basketball practices, but he rarely interacts with her nowadays. She won't admit it but she's happy that they are able to talk tonight. She then decided to accompany Jinyoung in the living room while he studied throughout the night. 

Nayeon: Oppa..

Jinyoung: Hmm?

Jinyoung answered without looking at her, focused on his book instead. Nayeon wanted to bring up the thing about him going to US but she thought Jinyoung doesn't want to talk about it since he hasn't mentioned it yet, even to JB. Maybe he's having second thoughts, who knows? When Nayeon didn't respond immediately, Jinyoung became curious and then looked at her.

Jinyoung: What is it?

Nayeon: Just... just want to ask what you wanted to take for College.

Jinyoung: Me? (Paused) I'm thinking of getting to a Medical school.

Nayeon: Really? So you really wanted to be a doctor.

Jinyoung: I really haven't thought about it, but you know I'm quite interested on it... How about you?

Nayeon: I haven't thought about it too..

Jinyoung: Then why bring that up?

Nayeon: Just wanted to ask.

Jinyoung flipped more pages. The truth is he's not actually studying, he just wanted to be with Nayeon that time. He pretends to read but he's not actually paying attention to any of it.

Jinyoung: Nayeon-ah.. Are you... and Mark...

Jinyoung stared into Nayeon's eyes. Nayeon felt a sudden shiver. Why on earth will Jinyoung ask her about Mark this time?

Nayeon: Don't tell me you're asking if we're dating now or something --

Jinyoung: Then?

Nayeon: (Sighs) We're not. (Laughs) Why do people keep on saying that? Nothing is happening, we're just close now.. that's it..

Jinyoung covered his face with the book. He smiled silently.

Jinyoung: So you're close now. And we're still not, isn't it?

Nayeon: Are you always that shallow? I even call you Oppa now. Is that what you call "not close"? Don't tell me you're jealous.

Nayeon didn't intend to say that. But Jinyoung wasn't able to answer, and it made her feel a bit nervous. 

Nayeon: I mean. You're always that petty, you know and --

Jinyoung: Maybe.

Nayeon: Eh?

Jinyoung: You... You are not supposed to be that close to anyone.. It makes me uncomfortable.. and worried.

Nayeon: Jinyoung-ah..

Jinyoung: I.. I don't want you to be close to him, Nayeon-ah. I want you to be by my side. I want you.. to stay with me.

NAYEON'S POV

I felt like I was about to burst. I've never been this nervous in front of Jinyoung. Did he really mean what he said earlier? I cannot even look at him in the eyes. Why is he doing this, making things uncomfortable?! Or is he just teasing me again? At least say something before I misunderstand you, Park Jinyoung!

Jinyoung: (Yawns and stand up) You're not sleeping yet? I think the sleeping pill is now taking its effects on me now.

Nayeon: (Awkwardly stands) Huh? I uhh.. I'm.. I'm just about to go too..

Jinyoung: Okay.

We walked together through the stairs and as I was about to turn off the lights, we both reached for the light switch, making our hands touch each other's too. I quickly reacted and took my hand. He also felt that he awkwardly moved backward and rubbed his hair. Oh, cr*p! Why did I turn off that light?! Now I can't see anything. I took my phone, used it as a flashlight, and followed Jinyoung while going up. I accidentally, dumbly, unfortunately tripped as I unconsciously grabbed Jinyoung's shirt.

Jinyoung: YA!!

I lost my balance. Fortunately Jinyoung was able to act immediately and prevent me from falling.

Jinyoung: You okay?

I can't see him clearly but I can feel his warm hands on my waist. We're too near each that I can hear his deep breathing.

Jinyoung: Why are you still so clumsy?!

He then let go of me as we both acknowledged that the situation is getting more awkward.

Nayeon: I can't see a thing!

Jinyoung: Well you turned off the lights!

Nayeon: You wanted too!

Jinyoung: (Sighs) But still you're the one who turned it off!

Nayeon: Tss. Still so petty.

He walked with me to Jungyeon's room before he went to his.

Jinyoung: Be careful, alright? Sleep now, night.

Nayeon: Good night..

I had a hard time shutting down my mind that night. I shouldn't have left the room earlier. I shouldn't have bumped into Jinyoung. I shouldn't have tried to start conversing with him. Why is this happening? Why can't I stop thinking about him? I'm not suppose to feel this way towards him. He's just your brother's best friend, Im Nayeon. He's just your childhood friend. You can't be fooled by that troll.

I ended up sleeping last night while thinking of Jinyoung. Come to think of it, we've known each other for over 12 years already. We met when his family moved from Busan and we've been neighbors since then. Both our families are close since my mom and Aunt Yubin are High School friends. They said I used to follow him all around when we were young. It never occurred to me that one day, I'll think of him more than a friend 'cause he's like a brother to me. But lately, he's acting strange. He stopped teasing me, he stopped arguing with me, he's becoming distant and it bothered me alot. Also what he said last night.. What did he mean when he said he want me to stay with him? Ugh.

Jihyo: Are you okay? You look... I don't know... zombified?

Nayeon: Jihyo-ya. You've been in love, right?

Jihyo: Eh? W--What are you talking about?

Nayeon: Do you think I'm dumb? I know there's something between you and that Day6 leader. I can't believe you hid that from me.

Jihyo: How did you -- (Looked around) Look, that's a secret, okay? No one else has to know that, even Jungyeon.

Nayeon: I think she knows though. The Yoo sisters know everything.

Jihyo: D*mn it! (Sighs) Alright. What is it that you wanted to ask?

Nayeon: I have this friend... and she's asking me about love.

Jihyo: Is this friend named Nayeon?

Nayeon: W--What? No, of course not!

Jihyo: Is you say so..

Nayeon: She's asking me for advice. And.. you know.. I don't have experience on that field.. So.. Mind if you tell me ho will you know that you're in love with someone?

Jihyo: Hmm, let's see. You love someone when he is the first one who comes to your mind when something happens, good or bad. You wanted to see him all the time, or talk to him all the time. And of course, you think about him all the time.

Nayeon: Really?

Jihyo: Oh, and another thing..

Nayeon: What is it?

Jihyo: He greatly affects your mood.

Nayeon: Huh?

Jihyo: What I mean is.. when he's down, you can't stop being bothered. When he's happy, you wanted to be a part of his happiness. It's like your world revolves around him. When you felt that towards someone, I'm positive you love him.

What Jihyo told me made sense. Someone who greatly affects my mood, someone who makes me smile even when I'm down, someone who I want to share happiness with.

Jungyeon: Park Jihyo, Im Nayeon, drama club meeting!

Jihyo: Okay!

Nayeon: Be right there!

While walking, I can't help but think about what Jihyo said: someone who greatly affects my mood.

Jihyo: So... did that friend of yours have someone in her mind now?

Nayeon: Huh?

At that very moment, Mark appeared right before my eyes.

Mark: Nayeon-ssi, have you eaten lunch already? I brought your lunch, you must've forgotten to bring it with you. (Grins)

Nayeon: Oh..

Coincidentally, Jinyoung also arrived with plastic bag on both hands.

Jinyoung: Nayeon-ah, did you eat already? I bought some.

Mark and Jinyoung exchanged glances, and I was trapped in confusion. Why is this happening to me?

Jungyeon: Ya! Nayeon is eating with me so back-off, you two!

Jungyeon grabbed my hand and saved me from both Mark and Jinyoung. After the meeting, we decided to eat our lunch in the drama club room to spare some time. I then happily sat and ate with Jungyeon and Jihyo while Mark and Jinyoung shared a table on the other side of the room. They're not talking nor even looking at each other.

Nayeon: Jungie-ah..

I hugged Jungyeon's arm and cuddled her like a kitten. I wanted to thank her so much! She should know how grateful I am to her for saving me there.

Jihyo: What's this? Don't tell me... you're talking about Jungyeon.

Nayeon: Eh?

Jungyeon: Eww, Nayeon. I have a boyfriend already. Limits, please?

Nayeon: Ya!

Jungyeon and Jihyo just laughed at me. What the hell. (Sighs) I did my best to avoid these two the whole day. I even intentionally left for school alone so that I won't see any of them. Why did I panicked at that moment? Why am I so afraid of confronting Mark or Jinyoung. Why the hell do they have to show up at the same time?! But the thing is... why am I confused the whole time? Just when I thought I'm ready for it, why do I have to feel it to them both? 😭