It isn't much longer until the doorbell can be heard along with a couple of knocks lightly rapping against the front door. Wonwoo and I both perk up and look towards the sound. “Let me go get that. I’ll be right back, okay?” Looking back at the older I notice just how tired he seems to appear, but he nods his head anyways and focuses back on the drama that is still playing.

I unlock the door and I’m instantly greeted with Vernon standing quietly with a hood over his head, face half covered. In one hand is a closed umbrella and the other is supporting a bag that’s slung over one shoulder. Something is definitely off this time.

I let him in by opening the door wider and he slowly steps in, immediately taking his damp sneakers off and then placing his outer coat in the closet beside the door while leaning his droplet covered umbrella against the wall. “Hey…” The younger looks up and then quickly back down. I bite my lip and try again. “Did you eat?” He shakes his head, fabric quietly ruffling with each languid movement, and I gently begin to push him in the direction of the kitchen, which the younger complies with silently. “Come on, I made food.” He still doesn’t say anything, just nods his head.

Once in the kitchen, the younger places his backpack on the ground and sits where I had previously eaten just moments ago. I busy myself with grabbing a plate and small bowl from the cabinet and plating his meal. “Who else is here?” I stop plating food and look over my shoulder to where Vernon’s looking at- the sink. “Earlier today I thought you said your parents went on a trip? I know that Minseo stays at your grandparents when they’re away.” Vernon’s tone is back to normal and instead of the somber one from before, it’s genuine curiosity.

Dipping the ladle  back in the pot I scoop some more soup into the youngers bowl. “Oh, uh, Wonwoo’s here.” Vernon doesn't say anything so I continue. “He kinda got into a fight with Joonea and… passed out after school.” I say in a smaller voice.

“Dude, is he okay?!”

“Shh!” I jerk my head towards the younger and give him a pleading face. Vernon immediately closes his mouth, but gives me a stern look in return. “Yes, Wonwoo’s perfectly fine, no one laid a finger on him, just shook him up a little. That’s all.” I close the pot with the lid and move on to the noodles, knowing that the younger would want a little bit of them as well. “Seungcheol and Jeonghan showed up a few minutes after I found Wonwoo and helped me get him here. None of us knew where his house was, so we just came to mine.” Gently, I place the plate down on the table in front of Vernon and then the bowl.

“What about calling his parents?” He asks while picking up his utensils. “Does he not have a phone or something?” I grab another bowl out of the cabinet and look back at Vernon.

“No. Well not anymore at least- look, I really don’t want to talk about it right now.” I let out a sigh and turn back to the rice cooker, already feeling sorry for being short with the younger, but I seriously can’t handle talking about this right now. I hear Vernon let out a quiet ‘fine’ before I begin to talk again. “Do you want rice?” I ask the question with the scoop in one hand and a bowl in the other, already knowing the response.

“Sure”

I set the rice on the table and seat myself in the chair across from Vernon, not wanting to leave him alone just yet. I pull out my phone and begin to look up some nearby beaches- still holding on to my previous thoughts about taking Wonwoo to one. I scroll through a few that are close enough to at least spend the day at and read a couple of reviews here and there.

If it wasn’t for the close eye I’m keeping on the younger, I would have missed his languid movements completely. Vernon takes a few more bites and suddenly stops, setting down his chopsticks and removing his hoodie from his head. I do a double take at the fresh bruise blossoming across the younger’s temple and place my phone slowly on the table. I’m just about to ask when he starts to talk- more like whisper. “She hit me this time…” Vernon looks down at his meal and I just stare at the mark. It’s not big, about half the size of a playing card, but it’s there nonetheless.

“What?” It’s the only word my brain is letting out.

“She hit me. Hard.” He sighs and continues “It’s never been this bad before.” I look down at my own lap where my hands lay. “You know, I always think about what it would be like if I decided to stay with my dad, like Sophia did. I-I just don’t want to leave my mom alone you know? What if she, oh god, what if she wanders out of the house when she’s this drunk?” My head jerks up at the frantic tone fusing into the youngers words. “What if she gets hurt? I'd feel responsible and I can’t live my life knowing I let that happen…”

“Vernon, you can’t blame yourself for her own decisions. You know that.” I say softly, but also with a bit of sterness to get my point across. “We could try talking to your dad again-”

“You know he doesn’t listen.” He cuts me off instantly and I have no choice but to let Vernon continue. “I’ve tried to get him to talk to her about rehab.” His voice is small and almost pleading. “The answer is always the same.” Vernon lets out a sigh and I opt to stare back down into my lap, finding the look on the youngers face too upsetting to stomach. “He just thinks she’ll go for a month or so and then get right back to her old ways and I don’t know man, I can’t say I blame him for thinking that way.”

A few beats of silence pass over the two of us like a chilled breeze. “Just know that you can stay here whenever you feel like it okay? My parents don’t mind.” I look over towards Vernon who’s messing with his bowl in front of him, looking younger than he ever has, but not in a youthful way, more of the vulnerable and insecure look. I try a little smile out on my lips and attempt to brighten the mood. “My mom is practically in love with you and I think Minseo is actually in love with you.” That gets him to quietly chuckle and I think Vernon is just thankful for the change of topic.

“Yeah, too bad I’m about as straight as a circle.” He then looks up at me with eyes that say, ‘I’m gonna be okay’, and that’s enough for me to take the hint.

I nod my head and smirk while standing up. “Eat up. I’m gonna go check on Wonwoo. When you’re done just put your plate in the sink. You can bring your stuff in the guest room at the end of the hall and take a shower.” Vernon knows the drill by now, but I always feel the need to baby him. Our age difference isn’t even that big, but I still find myself and Vernon having this kind of older and younger brother relationship.

Vernon picks up his utensils and begins to move some food around before bringing it to his mouth. “Alright.” The younger consciously stuffs his face with noodles and I let a tiny laugh slip as I round the corner out of the kitchen.

Once I enter the living room my eyes land on the top of Wonwoo’s head and I instantly make my way to the front of the couch to get his attention. “Won-” I stop once I see the older, who is currently tucked in the corner of the couch as if he’s not a 182 centimeter tall high schooler, but a young child who is much smaller. A tiny smile begins to form on to my unknowing face and I reach a hand out to shake the older’s shoulder lightly. “Hey, Wonwoo.” I say softly.

My eyes scan the latter’s face as it scrunches up and he begins to slowly look around the living room. “Hmm?” Wonwoo brings his tired eyes to my own pair and they seem to become more awake then just a few seconds ago, but not by much.

“You fell asleep.” My voice comes out soft and barely a whisper. The atmosphere is way too calm for any tone louder than this one- this intimate kind of moment. The magic is lost the second I slide my hand off of Wonwoo’s shoulder and I stand back to full height while taking a step back. He looks at me with a questioning stare. “I just didn’t think you’d want to sleep on the couch. It’s already almost eleven.” This gets his attention and his once tired eyes comically widen. I begin to laugh at his sudden realization. “Want me to show you to the guest room?” A few more giggles slip out, but Wonwoo doesn’t seem to mind, in fact he lets a beautiful smile spread gently onto his face and I couldn’t be more happy. The older takes the blanket off his lap and I jerk my head towards the direction of the staircase. “Come on.”

Upon entering the guestroom Wonwoo stops at the doorway and turns suddenly around; walking into my bathroom and coming back out in an instant with what looks to be his school uniform and a pair of worn converses.Wonwoo then carefully places his belongings on the chest at the front of the bed and doesn’t even think twice about yanking the duvet back and plopping himself onto the sheets.

I stand awkwardly across the room, trying not to think about how cute the older looks when he’s too tired to think about who’s watching. “If you need anything I’ll be down stairs for a little while longer, just until Vernon goes to bed and, uh, then I’ll be in my room.” The older makes a noise of acknowledgement while sinking into the charcoal sheets. “Just wake me up if something’s wrong.” And with that, I turn to walk out the bedroom, letting the older have his space.

“Can I talk to you about something?” Wonwoo’s baritone voice cuts off my movements like a wave crashing back into the warm ocean.

“U-uh, sure. What is it?” I can not exactly pinpoint as to why I’m feeling so immensely nervous at the older’s question of wanting to talk to me. My heart begins to race at the thought of him bringing up unwanted topics of bullies and my lingering stares that occur more than I’d like to admit, or perhaps something else he’s thought of entirely.

“I kinda…” He lazaly blinks and then yawns. “Have a secret.” Wonwoo whispers out, closing his eyes in the process.

I freeze completely because my first thought is the car accident and I’m not sure I can handle hearing the hard information coming straight from him. My eyes search his figure; covered by the white duvet that used to be mine, but I had bought a new one a few months back and my mom didn’t want to get rid of this one.

“Yeah?” I walk forward and perch myself at the foot of the bed, instead of standing awkwardly, but just until he’s done talking- which honestly shouldn't be too long considering he’s basically already falling back asleep.

The older blinks open one eye and lets out a soft ‘Hm’ and continues. “I talked for the first time in three years, yesterday…” I stare hard at Wonwoo, holding my breath at the news, and watch as his eyes connect with mine. He his lips and I can’t help but flick my gaze down at the movement. “Because of you.” Wonwoo’s voice is clear as day.

My heart begins to speed up and my hands that have been perched on either side of my hips are now clutching the white fabric with so much force that I am afraid he’ll notice, but it’s fine because in this moment, I realize I don’t care.

I don’t care if he notices my heavy breathing or my death grip I currently have on the duvet, all I truly care about right now is the new information that Wonwoo has decided to share with me. My first question I have for the older is simple enough. Why? Why did he decide to be mute for so long and why did he just now decide to quit? And I guess most importantly: How is it because of me? None of this makes sense.

“I-” My voice barely whispers out.

“There’s more to it, but I’m really tired right now.” He lazyly states while turning over in the bed, back now facing me, and I still have my mouth agape from the questions that I need to be answered. I guess this can wait though, he’s had a difficult day and honestly, so have I. Saving the current topic and the one from earlier tonight, in a corner of my brain that I’ll definitely be digging back up in the near future.

I decide to leave it at that, though I’m pretty sure Wonwoo wouldn't have continued even if I was to push him further. Letting out a sigh, I stand from the end of the bed and make my way towards the light switch. “Just g-go to sleep, okay?”

There’s ruffling in the sheets before I hear Wonwoo’s baritone voice. “Good night, Mingyu.” His tone is so soft and so fragile that it can even be interpreted as fond if my emotions weren’t such a jumbled up mess at the moment.

My hand ghosts lightly over the outlet with a heart beating erratically in my wide chest. “Good night, Wonwoo.” I whisper out before flipping the switch and shutting the door behind me. Once a few feet in the hall I stop and let out a breath I didn’t know I was holding.

I need to sort out my emotions.

●●

Once I’m done with cleaning the dishes and putting away any leftovers, I hear the hinges of a door scream open, notifying me that Vernon has finished in the bathroom. I quickly dry my freshly washed hands on a dishtowel and toss the rag on the island before making my way down the hall.

“Hey man, you gonna be okay?” I catch Vernon on his way back into the downstairs guest bedroom. The younger has a towel around his neck, dark locks slightly damp, and the bruise around his eye seems to stand out more than it did before against his fair skin. I inwardly sigh at the mere thought.

Vernon stops in his doorway, tired eyes noticing me a few feet away. He gives a lazy shrug from his right shoulder, towel moving further down in the process. “Yeah, I’ll be fine.” He answers a little too nonchalant and I’m  not really convinced by his answer, but I give him a nod and begin to to walk towards the stairs anyway. “Oh, uhm, Mingyu?” I turn my head at the sudden call to see Vernon leaning on the door; one hand resting lightly on the handle and the other gripping the side. He taps the wood lightly and looks down at the ground, as if he’s becoming bashful. “Seungkwan said yes.” He clears his throat. “I’ve got a date tomorrow.” This time his voice is more confident and words can’t even explain how proud I am of him.

“Oh my god, that’s- that’s awesome! At what time? What are you guys doing?” I turn my body completely around to face him better.

“We’re meeting up at five, in Nampo-dong. They have that market there where we can eat at and then I plan on taking him to this aquarium that’s down the street.” Vernon smiles shyly and looks back down at the ground, trying to hide the growing grin. “I just can’t believe I’m actually going on a date with him…”

“You’re going to have so much fun. You better send me pictures! Now get some rest, you have a big day tomorrow.” I point an accusing finger at him playfully.

Vernon gives me a light smile and then turns to c