au: deaf!wook

He was sitting on their bed one afternoon, flipping through a book he was trying to talk himself into reading, when his boyfriend burst into the room, shoving a piece of paper in front of his nose. Making a face, Ryeowook leaned back enough that he could actually read what was written and suddenly became very still, only his eyes flickering up to Jongwoon’s smiling face.

It was information about a new surgical procedure, one that could enable him to regain part - or even all - of what he’d lost so many years ago. With this operation, he might be able to hear again.

But Ryeowook didn’t allow himself to have too much hope. It was probably too expensive, he reasoned, or too risky. There wasn’t even a guarantee that he would regain his hearing at all. He slowly shook his head, pushing the paper away and picking his book back up. It was better to not even try. If they didn’t try, then they couldn’t be crushed when it didn’t work.

Jongwoon’s smile fell slightly, but he refused to give up, grabbing the book and hiding it behind his back, forcing Ryeowook to look more closely at the paper, and what his boyfriend had written there.

If you want to give it a try, I’ve been saving up for it. I want to do this for you, my little bear, if you want this. Promise me you’ll think about it, okay?

Ryeowook glanced up Jongwoon, who just grinned at him and ruffled his hair gently before dashing out of the room. He looked down at the paper in his hands and realized that he was trembling, but with fear or excitement he couldn’t quite tell. He swallowed, hard, and gripped the paper tightly. It couldn’t hurt to just look, right?

---

I want to hear his voice, Ryeowook decided. He was used to the silence and it didn’t bother him, not in the ways it used to bother him, but he wanted to hear Jongwoon’s voice. He decided that Jongwoon was worth the risk.

---

Jongwoon smiled down at his boyfriend, his fingers slowly gliding through Ryeowook’s silky hair as he tried to calm the younger man down. Ryeowook kept fidgeting, alternating between looking excited and terrified, and eventually just grabbed Jongwoon’s hand, holding it close to his chest.

The older man leaned down, pressing his lips first against the other’s cheeks and then his forehead. ‘It’ll be okay. I promise. And I’ll never stop loving you, you know that.’

Ryeowook nodded a little, looking slightly less scared as he signed back; ‘I love you too.’

“Mr. Kim? It’s time.” Two nurses had appeared in the doorway and Jongwoon stood up, nodding.

“Thank you,” he murmured, his fingers curling around Ryeowook’s when the younger man tugged on his sleeve, obviously confused about what was happening.

The nurses approached the bed and Ryeowook shrunk away from them, clinging to his hyung’s arm. Jongwoon smiled at them and held up one finger, then turned to his boyfriend and hugged him tightly, discretely signing ‘are you ready?’ against his back.

Ryeowook nodded slowly a moment later, sitting back and giving the older man a shaky smile as the nurses started to wheel him out of the room and down the hall, away from Jongwoon, away from his past.

The last thing he remembered before blacking out was a man in a surgical mask looming over him.

---

When he first regained consciousness, he didn’t open his eyes. He just lay there on the bed for a moment, straining his ears to see if he could hear anything at all. He’d almost given up hope when, all of a sudden, there was a loud beep to his right; he jumped and his eyes snapped open as he shot up, his heart beating wildly.

“Ryeowook?”

At first, the younger man completely ignored the sound coming from his left, too disoriented by the fact that his world wasn’t completely dipped in silence, but then he realized that Jongwoon was on his left and that noise was coming from him. That noise was his voice.

His eyes widened and he turned sharply, looking up at his hyung, a sort of squeaking noise escaping from his own lips as he frantically pressed his fingers on Jongwoon’s neck.

The older man felt his lips curve upwards into a hopeful smile. “Ryeowook, can you hear me?” he asked softly, signing his question to his boyfriend as well.

Ryeowook just sat, completely still, staring at him. There were sounds. After years of living in silence, of desperately trying to hide his desire to hear the voice of the man he loved, he was hearing. That voice was deep and rough, just like he’d always thought it would be, but a thousand, a million times better. He gently patted Jongwoon’s neck; more. He wanted to hear more. He wanted to hear.

The older man smiled brightly, feeling like his heart might burst at any moment, and started to sing the first song that popped into his mind.

Ryeowook could almost see the sounds as they spilled over Jongwoon’s lips, as they danced around the room, as they wrapped themselves around him and held him tightly, covering him in a blanket of warmth and safety and love. His entire face lit up in joy and he clapped his hands together, staring at them in amazement when they made sounds too. And suddenly he was two again, tapping and hitting everything he could reach to see what sound they could possibly make, even marveling at the high-pitched giggle that came from his lips and how it mixed with the deep laugh that was coming from Jongwoon.

Finally, he looked back up at Jongwoon and, trembling, he signed the three words he never thought he’d get to: ‘I can hear!’

---

Ryeowook had to relearn how to hear, how to tune out unwanted noises (though he was rather convinced that no noise could ever be unwanted after living with none for so long) and what each noise meant. He had to relearn how to talk as well, not having done so for twenty years. Jongwoon had taken it upon himself to teach Ryeowook everything. They were taking baby steps, he said one day, but that was all they needed to do. They would take those baby steps together, the path filled completely with enough love and laughter to last a lifetime.