It was February 12^th. It wasn’t any different of a day to Jongin than any other. He woke up, feeling as drowsy as ever, threw on his uniform, ate a small breakfast then left the apartment. He walked down the stairs to the city streets half asleep but grasped onto the railing just in case he felt like being clumsy. Things were getting better between Chanyeol and him. Jongin didn’t understand things how things had become so rocky with his once always-inseparable-best-friend Park Chanyeol but he decided to not dwell on it for the day.

The sun was shining over low clouds suddenly waking Jongin up for the rest of the day. Though his hair still looked slightly unkempt people didn’t seem to mind as he quickly the stray fringe away. A familiar figure caught his eye.

“Sehun,” the name slipped off Jongin’s tongue like a question, like he was surprised that Sehun was standing beside him waiting for the bus.

“Long time no see,” Sehun put up a hand as a greeting. Jongin shifted uncomfortably on one foot. He didn’t know what to say. His eyes stayed glued to a random street-food truck across the street. Steam poured from an opening on the top of its metal roofing. “Have you seen Baek or Chanyeol around?” Sehun asked suddenly.

Jongin turned back to the younger, rubbing the back of his neck. “Yeah, I’ve seen them around. Why?”

“Just wondering.” Sehun snapped back quickly and the conversation died down again. Jongin was back to fiddling with his hands in his pockets and looking for something else to admire. A thought popped into his head at that moment, though.

“Speaking of those two,” Jongin looked at Sehun again. Sehun looked back at him, curious. Jongin paused though, not sure how he should ask such a question. Words jumbled into his mouth and they came out in a mess. Sehun really had no idea what Jongin was trying to ask.

“They seem close lately,” Jongin finally sputtered out. Sehun nodded in agreement.

“Right, I haven’t seen Baekhyun in a while so that’s why I asked if you had seen him?”

“He’s with Chanyeol all the time now it seems.” Jongin replied. Sehun nodded again and sighed.

“It’s just been pretty quiet now. Jongdae just disappears and Baekhyun is now, too.” The younger explained. Jongin felt a tinge of sympathy for the other but remembering how Sehun never bothered to see Chanyeol in the hospital quickly pushed all the sorry he felt for the other away. The sound of Jongdae’s name makes Jongin flinch now.

Unexpectedly, Sehun moves closer to Jongin’s side. Jongin, caught off-guard, looks at Sehun skeptically. For a moment though he could see Sehun became visibly shaken. “Can you keep a secret?” Sehun peered up to Jongin. Something in the way Sehun looked up at him in that moment sent a crippling shiver down his spine.

“S-sure…” Jongin stuttered, almost afraid to hear what was coming next. Next, Sehun scanned the sea of people crowding around them, waiting for someone or looking for someone. Jongin couldn’t tell.

“Jongdae threatened us before he ran off,” Sehun whispered. Jongin’s eyebrows raised in surprise. “That is why Baekhyun and I never visited Yeol. I think he knew we knew what was going on. I think Jongdae knew that we were catching on.”

“Catching on to what?” Jongin pressed on.

“To what had happened between him and Chanyeol. I think everyone knew just how he felt about him and Chanyeol going off on him that day set him off the deep end.” It took Jongin a moment to remember what day he was talking about, hell, there was so much going on.

One stood out though, many months ago. When Chanyeol had told Jongin about him going off on Jongdae and leaving Baekhyun and Sehun with the fussy spoiled brat in that remote and outdated restaurant that long ago. Remembering this made Jongin nod finally in response to Sehun.

“I think Jongdae is just ing crazy now, Jongin,” the older looked back to the other. Sehun’s face became mortified, “I think Jongdae really wanted to kill Chany-”

“Hey guys,” Jongin and Sehun both jumped in fear of a voice suddenly joining their rather secretive conversation. The greeting was in a hushed tone and as the two both looked over their shoulders they saw Chanyeol leaning down to their level with a grin on his face. “Why are we whispering?”

Sehun pushed Chanyeol away playfully, “you scared us, damn.”

“Well, next time you guys shouldn’t be all huddled like you’re doing some drug deal or whatever.” Chanyeol cracked a joke. Baekhyun appeared from behind him, catching Jongin’s attention. Thinking about what Sehun just told him he started feeling a bit remorseful. He thought about the day he yelled at them in the school cafeteria and instantly regretted. Was this really the reason why they were always absent?

Jongin couldn’t help but gaze at Chanyeol’s high spirited self. It was barely 7 am but he was so energetic as always. Chanyeol scrambled around with Sehun, teasing him about if he was ever going to grow and other things of the sort. Something made him uneasy though as he watched Chanyeol. He broke his gaze from the taller boy and noticed how Baekhyun was gazing at Chanyeol as well.

Jongin couldn’t help but wonder even more.

February 12^th became more than just any other day when Jongin met Kyungsoo before classes began. Chanyeol was trying to drag Jongin off to their rooms but Kyungsoo always had a gravitational pull when it came to Jongin.

“It’s your birthday?” Jongin’s interest perked.

“Yeah,” Kyungsoo nodded. His eyes glanced down to the small gift bags and small bouquets that Kyungsoo had already gathered from teammates and girls.

“Ah, I’m jealous,” Jongin joked as he eyed all the decorative bags. He wondered how much candy was in them. “Happy birthday,” Jongin added. Kyungsoo’s expression brightened up to where his iconic smile left Jongin weak and slightly queasy in the stomach.

“Thanks,” was all Kyungsoo said. He began to walk off and Jongin would’ve just let it go like that but Chanyeol burst from behind.

“Kyungsoo!” He yelled. Jongin quickly became embarrassed seeing other people stare at Chanyeol and him. Kyungsoo looked back inquisitively. “Let’s do something after school for your birthday!”

Jongin’s eyes widened at the invitation. He locked his gaze with Kyungsoo and he laughed at the overly confident Chanyeol and the bashful Jongin standing right by him. They were always such a weird couple, everyone thought, but they had always been together so no one ever questioned it.

Jongin groaned with all the attention on him. He tried to slide away in silence with no one noticing.

School blurred by for Jongin. Maybe because it was Kyungsoo’s birthday or maybe it was because he was still stuck on what Sehun had told him. It wasn’t much of a surprise to Jongin but to hear someone else say what he had been thinking for months changed everything. Someone else actually understood what Jongin had been feeling this whole time. The frustration that always bothered him now was on someone else’s mind.

Jongin did almost everyone instead of pay attention to lectures. He fiddled with his pencil or he slept. Either of which was more interesting at the moment, he would do it. Though Chanyeol was healing now to the point where it seemed like nothing ever happened, Jongin could never forget how it all happened. How Jongdae was behind all this and even though officials tried to find a way to catch him there was nothing to be done. That’s what bothered Jongin the most.

Lunch time was a bit strange that day. Baekhyun and Sehun joined Jongin and Chanyeol. The table was almost full like way back when. Jongin as always stayed to himself as the others talked about anything that came to mind. Though, he had to take note of something. The way that Baekhyun had begun to act so differently around Chanyeol. Jongin didn’t want to admit it but it really seemed there was more going on between the two.

Jongin wasn’t angry or upset he was just confused. He wondered why Chanyeol would want to keep something like this from him. Jongin had opened up just days ago about something so personal but Chanyeol still never said a word about anything. Maybe, Jongin was a little angry. He watched Chanyeol hang off Baekhyun like he used to do with him. Maybe Jongin was a little jealous. He saw how happy Chanyeol was with Baekhyun by him. Maybe Jongin felt a little replaced.

Quickly, Jongin looked down at his food as a couple of hot tears splashed onto the metal tray sitting in front of him. His hands trembled a bit but not for long as a hand skimmed lightly across his shoulder. With glazed-over eyes, Jongin looked over his shoulder to see Kyungsoo looking down at him and the other boys sitting at the table.

“Got an extra seat?” Kyungsoo asked.

Chanyeol quickly gestured the seat next to Jongin was open for taking. Kyungsoo sat and joined the conversation. Jongin stared back down at his meal. It was getting cold, he thought.

“Your food’s getting cold,” Kyungsoo muttered. It was like they had the same mind track. Jongin sneakily rubbed the tears away from his face and began to chow down. Kyungsoo noticed the small wet streak the tears left on Jongin’s cheeks. But he didn’t bring it up. It just wasn’t a good time.

Soccer practice was lonely for Jongin. Though Chanyeol was there to talk to he didn’t really want to see the other. He kept his eyes towards the clouds and setting sun. He kept his thoughts on things that happened that day. He wondered if Chanyeol noticed he wasn’t acting the same.

A lot of the time, Kyungsoo glanced over to Jongin. In a way he was a little worried. It was Kyungsoo’s birthday but for some reason he wasn’t excited. Something didn’t feel right. It was like he knew something was going to happen but he didn’t know what. Maybe that’s how Jongin had felt, too. Kyungsoo wanted to talk to him but he didn’t know what to say. Neither never knew what to say to the other.

Chanyeol knocked into Kyungsoo, breaking him from his thoughts. Kyungsoo’s gaze snapped to Chanyeol.

“Sorry…” Chanyeol unexpectedly groaned. Kyungsoo immediately grabbed onto Chanyeol. He quickly realized something was wrong. Then, Chanyeol collapsed. It was just like that. Chanyeol fell to the ground so quick and though Kyungsoo tried to keep him on his feet, he just couldn’t support the other. Kyungsoo began to panic just like the others. Everyone screamed for someone, anyone, to call an ambulance.

It took a bit for Jongin to see that Chanyeol wasn’t going to get back up. He figured it would be like that time just days ago. But it wasn’t.

Chanyeol wasn’t responding this time.

Jongin tried not to panic as he walked the quickest he could to Chanyeol and the rest of the soccer team. So many times Jongin called for him to wake up but this time the other wasn’t waking up. Jongin wanted to do everything he could to try to get Chanyeol back up and moving but he knew nothing would work. Something was wrong and he couldn’t help. Jongin just hoped it was nothing serious.

As time passed Jongin did nothing but wait like everyone else. In this moment, nothing else mattered. To Jongin, it was just Chanyeol now. It was like he could see life passing right through him slowly as they waited for a miracle or the ambulance, whichever could come sooner. Inside, Jongin knew he couldn't panic but his brain was racing through so many possibilities. Was this the last time he'd see Chanyeol?

The ambulance reached a few minutes after everyone had flooded the phone lines, screaming for them to help the soccer star Park Chanyeol. Everyone cried out for help. Jongin was silent, though. He just buried his face in his hands. Two workers placed Chanyeol on a stretcher and as they rolled him away Jongin wanted to speak out. He wanted to join Chanyeol. His mouth was moving but no words could come out.

Jongin was just as lifeless as Chanyeol it seemed. Everything was going by in such a blur. He couldn't even ing function properly anymore.

“Can we join Chanyeol?” A hand flagged down the paramedics just before they closed the doors behind them. Kyungsoo tugged at Jongin's arm. “Please, we're his friends.”

Words echoed and slurred to Jongin. He didn't stop the tears now. Everywhere he looked it was blurred. He watched the blurry people in the back of the flashing truck motioning to him. His head cocked to the side in confusion. His hearing was distant and almost gone. Jongin was losing his mind, it feltl like. He saw a blurry Kyungsoo lead him into the room in the back of the vehicle. Kyungsoo carefully placed the catatonic Jongin on a seat to the side of Chanyeol.

The last time Jongin saw was the double doors slamming shut. The ceiling. Chanyeol's limp hand hanging off the gurney. 

I'm very sorry for such a short chapter. It's almost 3 am and I am so exhausted. I hope you can understand.