two
catching up
 

The next day they walk in together, laughing and having the time of their lives. I mentally curse for being so focused on the door instead of trying to sleep, but I just wanted to see her the moment she’d walk in this morning. I even got here earlier! I guess I just wanted to remind myself that it’s true, she’s back. I forgot for a second Eun Bi and Han Yi An live nearby and take the same bus. I forgot that even if they are not childhood friends, they are still very close and if she and Eun Byul hadn’t been separated when they were kids, then Eun Bi would also be childhood friends with the swimmer.

I close my eyes and pretend I’m sleeping just so I don’t have to see them being that friendly, joking like that and that guy wrapping his arm around her shoulders so intimately. For a few seconds I wonder if they finally got together now she’s back and he’s been waiting for her for six months, but then I scold myself for even going there. I’m not a masochist, I don’t need to this to myself. 

I know I said I can endure this as long as she’s here and is part of my life, but that doesn’t mean it won’t be difficult and painful. It’s just that not having her is worse. I’m just preferring the lesser of two evils.

“Gong Tae Kwang,” someone calls and I would normally keep my eyes closed and pretend I don’t hear, but it’s her voice. Even if I haven’t heard it in six months it is still as familiar as when she was around. “Don’t pretend to b—”

I cut in before she can finish the sentence, my whole body bustling straight and my eyes seeking her hungrily. She smiles amused when she sees me react like that.

“Hi,” she says with that beautiful smile of hers. “I knew you weren’t sleeping. Why do you always pretend to do it?”

“Force of habit?” I suggest and she takes seat in front of me, on a temporary empty space.

“You’re hopeless. Anyhow, I wanted to ask for a huge favour,” she adds next and I’m nodding before I can even hear what she wants. I’m willing to help her in any way she needs… except if it is to look for a present for Han Yi An or something the like. I don’t think I’m capable of that. “I want to go and visit the House Of Love and I thought maybe you’d like to come with me. I bet the kids have missed you, too.”

I feel touched that she is asking me to go with her and that thinks the kids would like to see me, too. To be honest, if she weren’t asking I don’t think I would visit, even if I had fun that time I spent there with her long ago when her twin sister repaired, and we learnt she wasn’t dead and it was all a misunderstanding. But now that she suggests that visit I find myself really excited about it.

“I’d love that,” I reply and she gives me her brightest smile before she has to go to her own seat.

We don’t spend the day together because swimmer boy is always around her, demanding her attention and so are her other two friends. That’s the thing with Eun Bi: she has more friends. Meanwhile, I only have her so when she’s busy I’m all alone again. To be honest, I don’t have the stomach to roam around her when those people are next to her. Specially Han Yi An. I can tolerate her other girl friends, but swimmer boy makes me sick to the stomach and when we are in the same reduced space it’s just glares and I don’t want to make Eun Bi uncomfortable. 

That is why I spend all the recesses by myself on the rooftop, enjoying the warm sun and the tranquility. Besides