Wednesday,23 September 2014

2 am

Taeyeon was sitting infront of the TV to see if there's any decent drama or show to watch.

Boring.

Boring.

Boring.

Taeyeon kept on changing the channels and finally stopped to watch the top-30 music videos. She held her cup of hot chocolate and chips as she was immersed,hoping they would top the chart. Though she knows Mr Mr went viral,she can't help to feel a little intimidated by other potential artists.

It was number 9 when she heard keys jingling outside of their dorm. She moved her gaze towards their front door and found who else but Jessica. She froze in her spot because it's kind of ridiculous how the Gods are playing with her life. 

Taeyeon mentally facepalmed herself because right now she's in an awkward situation. For her it is.

Jessica on the other hand was feeling nothing but sorry because she came in early in the morning.

Heyyy...what are you still doing up? Having trouble sleeping again?

Huh? Yeahh it's kind of hard to sleep nowadays.Taeyeon smiled weakly as she's fidgeting in her seat.

Jessica just sighed at the leader's answer while taking a seat beside her infront of the TV.

After what seems like awhile, Jessica opened , just to find them closed again. Taeyeon saw this and she was kind of bothered by the action so she decided to ask. 

What? Whats with your facial expression? Jessica was slightly taken aback when Taeyeon asked her that because she kind of doesn't want to say anything that was on her mind.

She looked at Taeyeon,knitting her eyebrows together and tried to smile through it. She finds it difficult to say. But since Taeyeon asked about it herself....

Well..don't be mad at me. But... Taeyeon looked at Jessica just to find herself blushing because Jessica's pouting and those eyes. Oh those eyes~

Jessica continues when she saw the older girl didn't seem to object where she's heading to.

I know you've been having trouble sleeping since the first day you realized we are now significant. And I know that you have thoughts...Dark thoughts in the middle of the night when you're all alone. Haunting you. And I'm also aware that sometimes you tend to turn to alcohol to get some sleep and shut the monsters in your head from destroying you any further. It's not yet severe but I think you think you're lonely. Taeyeon was stunned when she heard what the latter just said. She had slightly agaped. 

She admits she does feel lonely. Only when she's alone. She's so used to the crowd. To being around 8 other girls. It's at a level that when she's alone,all her dark secrets,her negative thoughts,her monsters came all at once. Her soul slowly losing it's identity. Her head playing a moment where everything went wrong over and over again.

Jessica and Taeyeon both knew that they are not that close to be having these kind of conversations. But somehow they both find comfort in talking about it. Jessica felt bad having said what she just said.T-T-Taeyeon-ah?

Taeyeon got out of her thoughts when she heard Jessica. She still had a questioning look on her face.

Im sorry. I shouldn't have brought it up. It's not my place to interfere. Sorry Jessica looked at her laps and slumped her shoulders when she realized how stupid she was.Then she felt a pair of hands cupping her cheeks and brought her head up to be met by those amazing looking eyes. Full of care. They both stared at each other for a few seconds when Taeyeon said,It's okay... We're a family. So you do have the rights to interfere. It means you care enough. Taeyeon lowered her gaze when she could no longer look into the latter's eyes. Her hands lowered to Jessica's arms.

Jessica was slightly interrupted because she swore she saw something else behind those dazzling brown orbs. Something dark. But it was taken out of sight when Taeyeon had lowered her head.

I guess it's because of the fact that we have always been around huge crowds. And we always had each other to entertain ourselves with. Most of us might want to take a break from all the nuisance and have a nice relaxing time alone. Throwing away all the tiredness. The act. Taeyeon paused for awhile to take a look at her company's reaction. And she was welcomed with a concerned smile,encouraging her to open up.

Though Jessica was surprised when their quiet leader who hates attention,who would rather keep all her thoughts in a bottle than to tell everyone about how she truly feels,who is reserved and has always been the one to listen not to tell,actually is talking about how she feels. And it's more surprising because it's her,Taeyeon's talking to. Out of all people.