Taeyeon's face seemed livelier than ever today. We've been best friends since our elementary school days, so I definitely know when something is affecting her mood. Some days, I'm part of the reason. Today is one of those days.

"What's up? You look like you just won the lottery or something." I told her.

She grinned at me. "Not the lottery, but this may be even better."

"Oh? And what is that?" I questioned, playing dumb.

She brought her arms around from behind her back, showing me a single rose and handwritten note.

"Someone gave this to me! I don't know who or how they got into my locker, but I this just appeared!"

I smiled at her. She would never know it was me. Even though I was the only person in this school to know her locker combination, my name was probably last on the list as a suspicious candidate.

"If I could meet them, I'd tell them I admire them a lot too. Hopefully, they have the courage to approach me after this." She thought aloud.

If only I had the bravery to do just that. My life would be so much simpler. If only I wasn't afraid of rejection, of ruining this friendship.

However, I was a coward.

I held my smile painfully. "Yeah... I hope so too."

An unfamiliar look flickered in Taeyeon's eyes as she turned towards me. "I'd tell this person that I'm willing to go out with them."

I became jealous... of myself. I was jealous of the person who wrote the message to her, even if it was me. That person was a hundred times more confident than the Tiffany in real life would ever be. I wanted to be the person she spoke about directly. I coveted to hear what she thinks of me in the terms of a lover.

"You don't even know who it's from." I replied.

Taeyeon scoffed at my remark, "But I do."

"Oh yeah? Who is it?" I asked, nervous that she knows of my secret.

"Someone special to me." She grinned idiotically, her true feelings masked behind squinted eyes.

"Who?" I pushed.

"Probably this one girl from my childhood." She shyly looked towards the rose again, rereading the message with curly letters. I deliberately used a different writing style to throw her off. No doubt she would have recognized my normal handwriting right away.

I sighed internally. It's me! I wanted to tell her. But I couldn't. I wouldn't.

"Well, good luck to you. If only she'd be brave enough to tell you herself." I said as I walked away.

"Yeah... if only she was brave enough." I heard Taeyeon say softly. I looked back as my legs brought be away from the one I wanted to run back to so badly. Her eyes bore into mine sadly as if she was disappointed in the situation. If I didn't know better, I would have thought that she was disappointed in me specifically.

But I know better. I tried to convince myself. However, later on I learned of the truth. Of what she knew at the time.

If only I was brave enough to stand up for myself, maybe my life wouldn't be such a mess.

If only I didn't give up on chasing after her.

But I did.

I did.