A Hint of Normalcy
Love? Hate? Death.
Yoochun POV
Let me enunciate on how badly Jaejoong and I freaked out when Yunho lost consciousness.
As Outposts of Nine, we weren’t *designed* to fall sick. All signs of viruses are completely eradicated from our systems by countless vaccines, pills and shots. There have never been *any* records of an Outpost falling sick, or succumbing to illness. Simply put, it was impossible for us to even get a runny nose.
I froze where I was, staring down at Yunho's unconscious form resting against my lap. Jaejoong responded by being Jaejoong. Screaming his head off.
"Whatdowedowhatdowedowhatdowedo?!" he squealed.
I said the only thing I could think of saying in that situation. "Turn off the gas. The food will burn."
Jaejoong ran to turn it off, before running back to me.
"Now what?!"
It took me a second to respond.
"I don't know."
It seemed Jaejoong was about to take action into his hands. He stepped over Yunho, sitting on his waist as he straddled Yunho's hips. Grabbing the collar of Yunho's shirt, he began violently shaking the elder awake.
"YUNNIE. WAKE. UP," he screeched.
"JAEJOONG DON'T!" I nearly screamed. Yunho's eyes shot open in shock, his hands immediately flying to Jaejoong's wrists in a reflex action to dislocate them. I intercepted by instinct, bringing my arm out to deflect Yunho's attack and slamming him to the floor as I did so.
There was a nanosecond of awkward silence between the three of us, as we gauged what to do.
"Yoochun," Yunho said, being the first to break the silence, "Help me up. The world is spinning."
I immediately retracted my hand and instead placed it on the small of his back to push him up to a sitting position. Once he had gotten into a sitting position however, he leaned forward to rest his forehead against his kneecaps.
"My head is pounding," I heard him say. "It's uncomfortable."
I rubbed the small of his back in comfort, massaging the nape of his neck as I did so.
"The AED voltage might have altered your immune system. Best you just rest to get over the fever."
"Don't we have to report to Nine?"
"No, we have the day off."
"Yoona Umma said we needed the rest," Jaejoong added.
"Where's Changmin and his younger brother?"
"Resting as well. Both are down with a fever."
Yunho nodded in understanding, probably too tired to say much.
"Yunho, lie down on the couch. Your condition wouldn't really promote much movement."
Yunho nodded, slowly moving to stand. He stumbled and I quickly caught him around the waist, helping him to upright himself as he leaned heavily against me.
"Yunnie!" Jaejoong squealed.
"Careful, Yunho. Slowly. Jaejoong, prepare the couch for him."
Jaejoong nodded as he went off. I ended half dragging Yunho to the couch, his arm slung over my shoulders. I tried to lower Yunho down gently, but he ended up flopping down onto the couch, immediately asleep. Jaejoong retrieved a thick downy blanket from the laundry room, making it a point to cocoon it around Yunho.
There was silence between us, before Jaejoong and I froze and simultaneously turned our heads to the direction of the door. I didn't hear anything, but I could feel a presence, an intrusion. Someone was in the house. I felt my body tensing in fear and apprehension. Who would that be? The Fixers? Would they be able to detect a faulty Outpost from afar? If it was, what would they do to Yunho? There haven't been records of an Outpost falling sick before. Would they exterminate Yunho?
Jaejoong curled his hands into fists, crouching slightly into an attack position. My hands suddenly itched for a weapon I didn't have. There weren't any footsteps heard, but I knew the person was getting closer. Who was it?
And walking into my vision was Junsu, dressed in a suit and tie, his blazer draped over his arm.
I sighed loudly as I straightened, my arms dropping to my side. Thank God for that.
"Junnie hyung," Jaejoong welcomed as he straightened as well, the relief evident in his voice. "Hello. How did you get in the house?"
Junsu tilted his head to the side. He looked almost confused, save for that stoic expression on his face. "I saw Yunho keying it in once." His eyes traveled to said person knocked out on the couch and his eyebrows came together in concern. He took several steps towards the couch. I flinched, torn whether to stop him or not. Junsu stopped, noticing my hesitancy.
"Do you think I'd stoop so low as to attack a man in his sleep? Yunho is my team mate. I won't harm him. As of yet."
He brushed past me, bristling me at his ending sentence. *As of yet* That still left room for consideration.
I turned to see him crouched in front of the couch, eyes studying Yunho silently, and placed a hand on Yunho's forehead. I bit my tongue to stop from lashing out at him. I knew he was my brother, and that I was supposed to trust him in order for the mission to go smoothly but for some reason I just couldn't. Seeing his hand on Yunho, who was so terrifyingly vulnerable at that moment made me awfully twitchy.
Jaejoong however, didn't seem to share my sentiment nor problem as he sat on the sofa arm, a hand never far from Yunho, like some sort of guardian Angel over the sleeping form. He stared at Junsu in strange amusement, yet never made a move to stop him. Like he trusted him.
"A fever," Junsu said, after a considerable amount of silence. "How rare." He suddenly stood, throwing his blazer on the other arm of the sofa before he headed to the kitchen. He made some noise in the kitchen, and I was about to ask what was up, before he came back out, a large bowl of water as well as two face towels in hand. "These should help," he said as he placed both items on the coffee table by the couch. "Wet them slightly and dab it across his abdomen to lower his temperature. Put the other on his forehead. I'll be upstairs."
And just like that he turned to leave, silently going up the stairs to the extra guest room. Jaejoong and I were silent for a while, before I caught his eye.
"I'll do it," he said, hopping off the arm rest to retrieve the towels, heeding to Junsu's instructions. I sat where I was, my elbows resting against my knees as I stared at the direction of Junsu's room. Well, it was his room now, anyways.
Accepting Junsu into our circle was harder than I had predicted. Junsu had the common attitude of an Outpost beaten into submission. These types never lasted long, valuing success in their mission over their lives, and Junsu's lack of understanding of a conscience made things twice as complicated. Everything he did, every step he took, every move he made was precise, forethought of and painfully calculated. There was never an action he did that did not fall back to the importance of the mission at hand. It should be simple, really, dealing with someone as innate as him, but it wasn't.
"You think we should get him some medicine? It looks like Yunnie might be knocked out for some time."
I turned my head towards Jaejoong, his wondering eyes on me. His hands rested gently against Yunho's ed shirt, a wet towel in his right hand.
"No. We don't know how his body will react to it, and frankly I'm too afraid to take the chance."
He nodded his understanding, his attention on Yunho once more.
I watched silently, as his hands fluttered oh so gently around Yunho's chest, continuing to his shirt before he carefully slid the towel over his lover's abdomen. You could see the obvious love and worry in his eyes, his hands never faltering as I heard him hum a soft tune, concentration fully on Yunho. When Yunho fidgeted, or even flinched in his sleep as a response to the cold wetness of the towel, the humming would suddenly break out in song, words traveling through the air in a blanket of comfort. His voice carried well, soft as a breeze, yet as clear as light. Like a mother's embrace. Or perhaps a lover's.
I always knew that Yunho would willingly break his back for Jae. The love and care he showered that was exclusively for him was an undeniably amazing feat, more so to the fact that Yunho cared for very few people in his life. But seeing Jaejoong as he was now, as vulnerable as he was, I knew that Jae would do anything for Yunho too.
The child I knew was growing up, I realized wryly as I leaned against the armchair. How fast time flies.
Jaejoong continued dabbing Yunho's upper body for about fifteen more minutes before he stopped, placing both towels back in the bowl and buttoning up Yunho's shirt and covering him with the blanket. He sighed, resting his chin against his palm, and for a moment, I didn't see a child, but rather an adult. An adult who was mature and growing and old enough to care for himself. No longer was he the childish Jae Jae with demanding needs and a handful of a personality but rather he was now Jaejoong, able to care not only for himself, but for others as well. My heart constricted uncomfortably. It lasted for but a moment before he got up to come and without a whisper of a warning, sit unceremoniously upon my lap.
"I want cuddles," I heard him mumble, his arms already around my waist and head buried in my chest. I couldn't help but laugh as I wrapped my arms around his shoulders.
Alright, perhaps he wasn't all that grown up.
He looked up at the sound of laughter, his eyes meeting mine, and in those genetically modified eyes of his I saw what I was searching for. Innocence. Youth. As well as a bit of confusion.
"Why did Chunnie hyung laugh?" he asked, an unconscious pout already on his lips.
"Ah, it was nothing," I replied hastily, my lips landing on his forehead in reassurance.
Jaejoong's tinted eyes searched mine for a moment, before he was once again resting against my chest, cheek against my pectoral. I knew his silence wasn't of anger, but that of wonder and confusion. Of worry.
"Chunnie hyung?"
"Yeah?"
"You won't fall sick, right?"
I smiled at the innocence of the question.
"I'll try not to."
"Promise?" he looked up at me then, his rounded chin resting between my ribs.
"Promise."
Satisfied, he leaned against me once more. "Good, because I don't think I like people around me falling sick. It's boring. And worrisome. And not fun."
I only hummed my answer, twirling his hair distractedly. My humming continued, before, just like Jaejoong's, it morphed into a soft song, a lullaby that put the child in my arms to sleep.
Junsu POV
I kept getting distracted.
I wasn't used to such an occurrence, so I slammed my laptop closed. I wasn't angry, nor frustrated at the constant interruptions, but rather now, I was curious.
What was that sound?
The thoughts in my head were too loud, getting louder than the reality around me, so I got up from the study table, the bed my only direction in mind. I had lost the sound, and needed to clear my thoughts to find it again.
I flopped down on the bed, ignoring the tendrils of pain creeping up my side from the punishment I had received back at Nine. Unlike my three new brothers, I had been denied the privilege of medication, simply being woken from my state of unconsciousness with a bucket of ice cold water in my face.
I felt pride blooming in my chest at the fact. I was stronger than the three, stronger than Yunho even, that I had withstood the punishment without any medical attention. Why, even Yunho's heart had stopped, his body being unable to take the rapid changes in his core temperature. I, however, had lasted throughout the entire ordeal without a word escaping my mouth. I stood strong. I was resilient. I was amazing. I was powerful.
I felt a smile breaking through my lips at the fact, at the mere idea that I was, somehow, in a way, better than them. A chuckle wanted to break through my lips as well, but it was suddenly halted by the pain shooting up my hip all the way to my ribs. I gasped instead, letting out a sliver of weakness escape my lips through a dry cough of shock.
I sat up, a hand to my waist as I rearranged my features, flawlessly hiding my pain once more. I closed my eyes for a moment, letting the pain seep out my mind.
In that moment of clarity, I heard it once more.
A song, drifting through the air, wrapping around me like a soft embrace. Catching the sound in my head, I opened my eyes. It was more a hummed melody than a proper song, but I could still catch the words if I tried. It was in Japanese, much to my amusement.
Pain forgotten, or at least adapted to, I got up, making way to the source of the sound. I found myself traveling down the hallway, making way down the stairs to the common room, where all three new brothers of mine were.
Despite me being completely quiet, Yoochun looked up. I knew at once that it was he who had been singing because the song suddenly stopped, his lips no longer moving in a hummed melody. I felt my heart constrict at the loss of song.
My eyes traveled from his face downwards, to see Jaejoong slumbering in his arms, fully asleep, just like Yunho. Perhaps that was why he was singing. To put the younger to sleep.
Silence between the two of us stretched, being the only two wake inhabitants in the room.
"You were singing." I mouthed the words, knowing full well Yoochun's ability to lip-read. I knew how lightly Outposts slept, and with one man down and a very heavy duty mission between the four of us, I knew they needed all the recuperation necessary. "Why?"
Yoochun blinked in confusion for a while before he nodded. "Did it disturb you? I apologize."
I shook my head. "It didn't."
A soft smile appeared on his lips for some reason. "I'm glad," he mouthed.
"You didn't answer me. Why were you singing?" I was curious, nothing more, nothing less. I found myself taking a seat by the empty armchair across from him.
"Singing calms not only the mind, but the body as well." Yoochun's answer was patient, like he was explaining to an inquisitive child, as he carefully repositioned the sleeping Jaejoong so the younger wouldn't slide off his lap. "Did it calm you?"
"Yes," I answered, unashamed of my honesty because unless there was a dire need to lie, I wouldn't do it. "How?"
"I don't know. Music always has that effect on people."
"Do it again."
"Do what?"
"Sing."
Yoochun audibly laughed this time, his soft chuckles replacing the silence. It was cut short however, when Jaejoong mewled softly, disturbed by the noise. On what I assumed was a reflex action, Yoochun hummed another tune, as unfamiliar to me as all the other songs he had sung, but as comforting as a childhood lullaby. His humming slowly morphed to words once more, and I closed my eyes, letting the melody envelope me.
Yoochun POV
I looked up to see Junsu asleep. Wait. Was he asleep? He seemed so.
My lips twitched in a smile, but couldn't really because of the song I was still singing. I didn't stop, in fact I haven't stopped for the past ten minutes, three different songs passing through my lips. It was strange how I heeded so easily to Junsu's request, but I had found it strangely endearing when he had come to me, simply to ask me to sing, and then fall asleep as I did so.
I must say he was a strange one.
Perhaps my assumption that he would be a difficult one was wrong. I had never seen anyone so open, to just ask someone to sing for them, for curiosity or what I wasn't sure. Maybe it was a sign of a new beginning.
I leaned back against the sofa arm, a light feeling in my chest as the song died away from my lips, reduced to soft humming. I stood up, Jaejoong carefully held in my arms before I made way up the stairs to his bedroom. Placing him on his bed, my humming died away completely as I placed a soft kiss on the slumbering boy's forehead, before covering him with his blanket.
Yoona had promised to give us a rest day for tomorrow, but I wouldn't be so surprised if we were called in for another discussion. And anyways, Kangta had yet to meet the Shim brothers. He would want to meet them for evaluation, and soon.
My heart constricted in apprehension at the fact.
There was clearly no way that Kangta would let them go Scott-free, he was too severe for that. Changmin and Karam had not only seen our faces, but they had recognized us. We were school mates, and Jaejoong, I knew, was in the same class as Karam, the younger brother. They knew too much about us, and the threat that brought would be too large for Kangta to merely turn a blind eye over the brothers.
Perhaps I could convince Kangta otherwise. Maybe the brothers could join us. Join us in becoming Outposts. Changmin was a very clever kid, I knew he dabbled in hacking and 3D designing and I was sure that that'd be a great asset to Nine. Karam was swift, nimble and young. With youth on his side, adaptability would be easier. I was sure with the necessary training both brothers could --
I stopped myself, physically lurching forward in disgust. How could I. How could I wish for such a life for the brothers. How could I even, for a second, hope for them to live the life I do, to go through so much physical and mental pain on a daily basis. I felt bile rise up my throat in repulsion to my own thoughts. What a sick person I was. I would *never* wish for the life I have upon someone. Never. That would be too sick, too cruel, and too selfish.
But at least they'd still live
I halted the thought, forcing it from my mind. Kangta killing Changmin and Karam was not a given. Perhaps a miracle would happen and he'd spare them, just like that. Yes, it was rare and near impossible, but if Jaejoong had taught me one thing, was that anything was possible if you believed. It was a childish thought, I know, but that childish thought was the basis of Jaejoong's belief and honestly, it had yet to disappoint him. Maybe it wouldn't disappoint me either.
I straightened, exiting Jaejoong's bedroom and making way to my room a distance away. There was no way that I could control the outcome of whatever would happen to the brothers, and it was best for me not to worry and spend my energy on the mission at hand.
There were other targets to focus on, and I couldn't just let the presence of Changmin and Karam affect everything.
Junsu POV
I opened my eyes to the sound of silence, seeing an empty sofa in front of me. Yoochun had moved, taking Jaejoong along with him, I assumed. I looked to the right, seeing Yunho still fast asleep on the couch before I closed my eyes, searching for Yoochun with my mind. I couldn't hear him, and I only had to assume that he was asleep.
I moved, as quickly and as silently as I possibly could.
Crouching in front of Yunho, I grabbed my syringe and vacuum sealed container from my blazer. Yunho was going through a phase of weakness I knew could potentially help in the extermination of the Outposts. Perhaps the fever he was having was a result of the reaction from the torture. If that weakness was somehow harnessed, then defeating Nine could possibly be easier than expected.
As gently as I could, I took Yunho's left hand in mine, turning it palm downwards to search for a vein to pierce. I slipped the needle into the quickest vein I could find, hastily extracting blood from his hand.
Yunho's eyes opened as I did so, half-lidded and still heavy with sleep. His eyes roamed the surroundings for a moment, a blank and cold stare that was halted when I gently rested my free hand on them, covering his eyes and slipping the needle out with my other hand as I did so. I felt his eyelashes tickle my palm as he closed them for sleep once more.
I let out a silent breathe I hadn't realised I had been holding in as I stood, the blood-filled syringe in my hand. Transferring the blood into the container, I made a move to leave the house, as silently and as inconspicuously as possible.
Yunho POV
I woke up, delirious, confused and completely restless. Sitting up, I realized that my headache still pounded, although not as strongly now. Slowly, my eyes focused on my surroundings, and they confused me slightly.
The common room? Since when had I gone here? Perhaps the fever had fogged up my memory a bit too much. I felt uncharacteristically cold, only to realise that my shirt was wet. With sweat? I didn't think so. I was much too cold to produce even an ounce of sweat.
Confused and slightly uncomfortable in my own skin, I called out the first name that popped up in my mind.
"Yoochun." My voice sounded hoarse, croaky even, and I craved for a glass of warm water. I didn't need to repeat, knowing Yoochun could pick up a sneeze from the basement if need be.
Several seconds later, I looked up to a presence, a hand already on my forehead.
"How are you feeling? Your body's still pretty warm."
I cringed slightly at the volume of his voice. "Hush. Don't speak so loudly. It makes my head pound."
"I'm sorry," he said, significantly dropping his voice to a near whisper.
I closed my eyes as the world started spinning once more, and leaned heavily against the sofa, pinching the bridge of my nose.
"Perhaps you should sleep. We have the day off to rest. Do you want anything?"
"Water," I replied quickly, "Warm water."
Yoochun moved away, heeding to my request as he came back with a glass. I drank slowly, noticing the pounding lessened the more I drank. I handed the now empty glass to him with a mutter of thanks, before I leaned against the cushions, my eyes already closed for sleep.
"Yunho, perhaps you should move to a bed. It'll be more comfortable for you, rather than sleeping against this stiff couch."
I nodded in agreement, getting up to move. Immediately, a hand was on the small of my back, resting lightly in concern.
"Please be careful," I heard Yoochun mutter.
"I may be sick, Yoochun, but I am not made of glass." I heard the chuckle, missing the smile as Yoochun wrapped an arm around my waist to support me.
"You're really cute when you're sick."
"I detest being sick. It is against my nature."
Comfortable silence ensued, as I moved up the stairs, rejecting any offer of support, Yoochun fluttering around me not unlike a mother hen. Once at the top of the stairs, I turned to face him.
"Go check on the Shims. I can manage."
"Are you sure?" The hesitancy and doubt in his voice made me give him a stare of daggers, as if the question itself insulted me. In truth it did. I was sick, not an invalid.
Yoochun's maternal instincts were quite something.
He gave me a semi-apologetic loop-sided grin as he backed off, disappearing from my view soon enough.
I stood where I was, closing my eyes and resting a hand against the wall. I searched for a moment of clarity, forcefully absorbing all the pain my body felt, ridding and driving it off my system. I opened my eyes to stand straight, dropping my hand off the wall, resolutely ignoring the dull throb of my head.
I took a few tentative steps forward, adapting myself to my weak state. The subsequent steps were easier as a result, though I admit I had barely an idea which way I was heading. My mind was too fogged up, and I could only move where my legs brought me.
Perhaps it was instinct, or sixth sense, but I zeroed in on a closed door a short distance away, making it my aim to reach it and enter whatever room it was to take a rest. My left hand grazed the wall as I walked, sensing direction since I could barely see for myself. I reached for the doorknob, swinging the door open soundlessly as I entered just as quietly, making way to the only thing I could focus on; a bed at the far end of the room.
I somehow managed to walk steadily towards it, before I carefully sat on the soft bed. No need to be an animal and jump upon it like a beast. The pounding in my head suddenly intensified till my own vision turned hazy. I slowly moved to lie down, my head resting against the downy pillow, my pained eyes already calling for sleep. Arms suddenly s around my chest from behind, and I turned to face Jaejoong, my eyes still closed for sleep.
Soft lips met mine before a chuckle, as Jaejoong squirmed momentarily, before I felt his arms around my neck, pulling me downwards to lean against his chest.
"Sleep, Yunnie. You're so hot I could boil water on your skin." His voice was laced with sleep. Had I woken him unintentionally? I thought of apologizing, but the weight of his arms around my shoulders and his chin resting upon my head made it too comfortable, and I found myself falling asleep without a second thought.
Yoochun POV
I jolted awake for a reason unknown, finding my face plastered to the blueprints I had splayed all over the huge study. In an effort to keep my mind off the current state of affairs, I had dove head first into planning the next phase of the mission. My efforts were futile however, when my mind kept wondering to the fate of the two brothers. In a fit of frustration, I had thumped my head against the hard oak wood, and unknowingly fell asleep when I failed to move after several minutes. I must be really tired, I realised as I rubbed my wrists against my closed eyes. Well, no point trying to continue now.
A knock on the door made me turn my head, as Junsu slowly came into view from behind the slowly opening door.
"Junsu," I greeted, straightening as I began carding a hand through my hair.
"The Shim sons are awake. Do you want me to deal with that?"
"Huh?" I squinted my eyes in confusion, not getting to what he was hinting at, my mind still fogged up with sleep.
"Changmin and Karam," Junsu explained curtly, as if that was enough of a hint to show.
Gears shifted in my head as I finally understood, and at the same time, alarm bells went off in my mind.
do you want me to deal with that?
"No!" I practically yelled, making a ruckus as I stood too quickly and the chair I was sitting on toppled over backwards. Junsu flinched in shock, obviously taken aback by my reaction, and I struggled to collect myself.
"I mean, no, no, it's okay. I can deal with them. They're sick and the risk of contracting their illness wouldn't be something you'd want to deal with."
"I see," he replied after a few moments of awkward silence.
I took a glance at the wall clock, seeing the time before I gave him a onceover. "Were you from somewhere?"
Junsu's eyes widened slightly in surprise, probably at the randomness of my question.
"You changed your outfit. I saw you in a different attire a few hours ago but this already looks worn in," I explained. The question sounded painfully awkward, but I couldn't help wondering what my eyes could see.
"I went back to Nine and bathed."
"You drove all the way *there* when we have bathrooms here?"
Junsu didn't answer, leveling my gaze, as if daring me to challenge his logic.
I sighed as I dropped my shoulders, shaking my head in amusement. A cold exterior was something I was used to with Yunho and his hardly even fazed me. "Junsu, you're our brother. This house is yours too. Any room you want to use, you are at liberty to. You don't have to inconvenience yourself to that extent, alright?" I gave him a soft smile, tilting my head slightly to the side as I tried to convey my sincerity the best I could.
Junsu seemed frozen on the spot, a loss of how to respond, before he nodded once. "Understood." And he turned and left.
I stared as he closed the door behind him, his footsteps audible perhaps only to Outposts as he went down the stairs.
I felt a strange feeling in my chest as I wanted to laugh, yet at the same time cry at the extent of Junsu's gullibility. He was painfully innocent in a way that made it sympathetic. Perhaps it reminded me slightly of Jaejoong, who still managed to retain his innocence despite. Yet Junsu was different. His personality was ravaged from years of training at Nine, yet at the same time, his innocence was kept due to his blindness of the outside world, of humanity and pretty much everything else that did not include the teachings of Nine.
I took to give myself another sigh as I shook my head, focusing on what was at hand.
I padded downstairs barefoot. I had always wanted the house to be shoe-free, but Yunho tended to forget to take his shoes off when he was rushing from a mission. Which was pretty much always.
As the highest ranking Outpost in Nine, Yunho had the most experience for the job, and was sometimes the busiest, even going into missions solo at times. So even when I wasn't busy with school or 'work', Yunho always was.
And hence I had given up on a 'no shoes in the house' rule.
I passed by Junsu in the library, a book in hand and earphones plugged in. It was obviously a sign that he didn't want to be disturbed so I continued on.
The silence of the house wasn't something I was unused to. The house would get like this from time to time when Jaejoong was warded in the hospital or the asylum, and Yunho being as silent as he always was. But now, with five other people in the house and it still being as quiet made it slightly unnerving.
I moved to the kitchen, making an early dinner of chicken porridge for Yunho, Changmin and Karam, and a bowl of Chicken Fried Rice with the rest of the leftover rice from the cooker. I had to look up online for what would make an acceptable drink for people with fever, and ended up having to drive to the nearest convenience store for a bottle of apple juice for Karam and Chamomile tea for Yunho and Changmin. It was only as an afterthought that I grabbed some cold pills from a pharmacy for Changmin and Karam. They were 'normal', weren't they? I assumed they could swallow over-the-counter pills if needed.
My return to the house was still uneventful, since I had been gone no less than a half hour. I felt like a domestic housewife running around doing errands.
I grabbed a few trays, arranging the meal in terms of person eating. Apple juice and porridge for Karam, Fried Rice and coffee for Junsu, chocolate milk and the same rice for Jaejoong and chicken porridge and Chamomile tea for Changmin and Yunho.
I gloated for a bit as I stared at all the neatly arranged food on the trays before I caught myself.
Man, I guess I really was a domestic housewife.
I grabbed Junsu's tray, making way to the library as I did so.
Junsu looked up as soon as I knocked, instinctively pulling his earpiece out.
"Hey, I made dinner," I said, placing the tray on the study he was using. "Don't forget to eat, alright? It's nicer when it's still warm."
Junsu had a confused expression on as he looked at the tray of food, then back at me, then back at the tray.
"What's up?" I asked, before he shook his head.
"Nothing. No one's cooked for me before."
I shrugged. "It's nothing. I always cook meals for everyone. Jaejoong tried once, he about burned the kitchen down, and Yunho doesn't have the patience to cook so I'm the sole user of the kitchen. There's more downstairs if you want."
I left, secretly gleeful at Junsu's dumbfounded expression.
What did I say about him being cute?
Exactly.
I made the second trip down to the kitchen to grab the lovey dovey couple's tray, deciding that it was easier to put all their food in one since they were in the same room.
I had a sneaking suspicion of where they would be since I had overheard Yunho's footsteps a few hours before. They had been uncharacteristically loud so detection wasn't all that difficult.
I stood outside Jaejoong's bedroom door for a moment, listening in to know if I would be interrupting anything important. Sounds like I wouldn't.
I opened the door soundlessly, seeing Yunho and Jaejoong both asleep on the bed. What surprised me, and touched me to no end however, was the position the both of them were in.
Yunho was curled up against Jaejoong, his head resting against the younger's chest, a soft hand resting on Jaejoong's hip, while Jaejoong had his arms wrapped protectively around Yunho's head. It was a sight that was usually in reverse, with Jaejoong cuddled in Yunho's arms, but it was infinitely sweeter because of Yunho's constant portrayal of being the stronger man.
It showed, not his weakness, but rather his morality, something he always tried to hide. I found myself smiling as I traveled the short distance forward to place the tray on the bedside table.
"Jae Jae?" I whispered, sitting gently against Yunho's side of the bed, the elder's back to me.
Jaejoong's eyes opened immediately, laced with sleep and confusion.
"Chunnie," he greeted, a sleepy smile on his lips as he settled comfortable into his pillow, chin grazing the top of Yunho's head.
"How is he?" I asked, leaning to the side to rest my weight against the heel of my hand. Yunho looked deeply asleep, his breathing deep but even, as he lay on his side. The thick blanket was brought halfway up chest, his shoulders barely peeking through. What was amazing was that he was still asleep between Jaejoong and I, despite the shift in weight and the conversations between us. He must’ve been really tired, more than I had expected.
"Deeply asleep," Jaejoong answered, carding a hand through Yunho's hair. "See? He doesn't wake up."
I placed a hand on Jaejoong's, asking him to stop. "No need to try," I advised gently. "His body needs the sleep. Let him rest, okay?"
"Okay," Jaejoong agreed, nodding along.
"How's he been, mostly?"
Jaejoong gave me a soft shrug. "He hasn't moved an inch since he came into the room. And that was about four hours ago. I think his fever's gone down. He wasn't as hot as he was before."
I put my hand on Yunho's forehead to clarify, and he was right. It was still hot, but thankfully not as hot as before. His hair was wet with sweat, a sign that his body was successfully fighting away the fever.
I took a glance at the clock, calculating how long Yunho had been asleep. It would be a solid twenty four hours, if not more.
"If he isn't awake by eleven, you should wake him. He needs sustenance after fighting off the virus for so long. And twenty four hours without food is going to weaken him considerably for the mission."
"Twenty four hours? Wow, Yunnie sleeps like the dead!"
I laughed at the comparison, ruffling Jaejoong's hair as I did so. "I need to check up on Changmin and Karam. Don't forget to eat your food. You'll be okay, right?"
Jaejoong nodded a bit too vigorously. "Of course! I got it covered." He gave me a mock salute, before cuddling into the blanket once more, eyes closed for sleep.
I tiptoed out the room, making way to the kitchen once more to grab Karam and Changmin's tray of food. I wonder if they had even eaten the previous trays of food. I sort of understood that if I was in their shoes right now, I wouldn't have the appetite to eat either.
I slipped into Karam's room first, aware of how late it was.
Karam was asleep, lying on his front, arms spread eagled with half his body covered by the blanket. It struck me how much he looked like Jaejoong; pointy nose, rounded chin, pouty lips. They could pass off easily as siblings.
His tray of food was empty, and his damp hair meant that he had just finished a bath. Good. It was a sign that he was recovering from the fever.
I placed the tray by the bedside again, retrieving the empty one as I did so. Out of mere concern, I felt for a temperature on his nape. His damp hair would lower the heat on his forehead, making it inaccurate to gauge. No fever, I smiled to myself.
I left him as he was, heading to the adjacent room; Changmin's.
He was wide awake, which somehow didn't surprise me, and was leaning against the headboard, remote pointed to the muted tv, as he consistently switched channels. His eyes swiveled to me for a moment, before they were on the screen once more.
"Changmin?" I prompted as the silence between us stretched. I hadn't moved from the doorway, Changmin's tray of food in hand, and Karam's empty one stacked beneath it.
"It's not there."
I stayed silent, confused. "What is?"
"Karam and I. The break-in. It's not on the news," he explained curtly, eyes still glued to the ever changing channels of the tv.
I felt my heart clench painfully, my hands tightening ferociously around the edges of the tray. He wasn't getting it, I realised.
"Nine is protecting the secrecy of the mission."
"Nine?"
"The organization we work with. It will be under lock and key for as long as necessary."
"But Siwon is a politician. He's involved with the government."
"Changmin," I had to hide a sigh. He was too new to this, too hopeful of a positive outcome. It pained me to break it to him, but unfortunately, somebody had to. "Nine *is* the government."
There was silence, as the tv was suddenly switched off, a remote control being hurled against the screen. It bounced off the bulletproof glass with a loud thud, landing soundlessly as it hit the carpeted floor. I could hear Changmin's growl of frustration, turning to see him grip his hair with both hands, head ducked between his knees.
"Changmin."
"Don't," he interrupted me before I could say anymore. "Just don't."
The tone of finality was strong, something I didn't want to argue against.
"I-" I started, an endless amount of words vying to leave my mouth. "I... I brought food. I'll just leave it here in case you want to eat."
I slipped the tray onto the study table, shutting the door behind me as I left.
It wasn’t that I didn’t care. It wasn’t even that I didn’t want to help. But what could I do? *What could I do?* I was powerless in this almost as much as he was. I was only a pawn, moved and shifted according to the player’s liking. If he was to be killed, then what could I do?
I leaned heavily against the reinforced door, sliding to a sitting position as my forehead rested against my knees. I was doing it again. I was growing weaker, letting emotions override me, listening to my heart rather than my head, and letting both control me.
I couldn’t stop myself. I *wouldn’t* stop myself. I knew that there was something wrong with my moment of weakness, but something told me that I wasn't going to regret it.
Yunho POV
Restlessness, as I felt myself grow uncomfortably cold, yet could feel sweat plastered to my forehead. I curled into myself, hands tightening into fists, gripping onto fabric. I felt movement around me, a hand running through my hair, lips pressed to my forehead as a melody sung in a soft hum enveloped me.
Somebody was there, with me, right by my side.
I found myself relaxing slightly, my grip onto the fabric already loosening, as the kisses continued on, running down my forehead to my brow, my nose, my philtrum, before slowly and gently landing on my lips.
“Yunnie, wake up,” he whispered, lips still on mine, his breath smelling like vanilla.
I opened my eyes slowly. My eyelids were heavy, for some reason, and my discomfort at the sudden invasion of light made me close them once more, curling into myself till the position of the lips were no longer on mine, but were resting on my forehead.
A giggle, as Jaejoong kissed my forehead once more. “Yunnie. Love, wake up. You’ve been asleep for nearly a day.” His hands danced on my skin, running through my hair, wiping my brow, my cheek. His touches were insistent, and it was with amusement that I realized that he was purposefully trying to disturb me so I wouldn’t fall asleep.
I forced my eyes open and looked up at him, seeing a blinding smile greet me. “Good morning then,” I mumbled, voice hoarse from sleep.
“Morning?” A fly of giggles were let loose as Jaejoong amused himself at my expense. “Yunnie, it’s nearly midnight. You slept through the whole of today.”
I moved to sit up, slightly surprised at the fact. It was a great relief that the throbbing in my head had died down considerably, leaving only a dull and distant pain I could easily push to the back of my mind. I pushed the blanket off me, pleased to realize that the atmosphere wasn’t so painfully cold now.
“Are you feeling better?” Jaejoong asked, his hands wrapping around my waist from behind as his chin rested on my shoulder.
“Yes, thank you,” I said, moving to place a soft kiss on his forehead. “And thank you for letting me sleep with you.”
“Don’t thank me. Chunnie hyung did most of the work, since Oppa and Karam onii-san are down with a fever too.”
“And where might Yoochun be?”
He shrugged, momentarily tightening his hold on my waist as he did so. “Asleep? Oh!” he exclaimed as he let me go to turn around, “I nearly forgot. Chunnie hyung cooked for you, Yunnie! He made you porridge and said you had to eat it. HAD to!”
I shook my head, rejecting the offer of food, even though Jaejoong had already placed the bowl on his lap. “I’m not hungry.” Honestly, I did feel slightly queasy and my appetite hadn’t really come back as of yet.
“Yunnie!” Jaejoong whined, extending the last vowel unnecessarily long. “Chunnie hyung made it just. For. You! You HAVE to eat it! I’ll feed you. Jae Jae will feed you?”
I felt a bubble of laughter growing up my chest, reaching up to my throat, but died down before it could reach my lips. Jaejoong would always have his ways, who was I to argue? I would always lose anyways.
“Alright,” I said, giving in. “Just a bit.”
The Cheshire smile that spread on his lips was amusing to say the least.
Yoochun POV
Running footsteps, trained, quiet and calculated. Soft, calm footsteps behind them. A door, my bedroom door, to be more specific, being burst open.
I didn’t even bother to open my eyes as I heard Jaejoong scream in excitement as he landed unceremoniously on my bed, unsettling my sheets as he climbed atop my back.
“Chunnie~ Wakey wakey!” he patted the small of my back roughly, before a loud kiss was placed on my cheek. “Morning time! We have to get to Nine!”
I opened my eyes this time and looked behind me to see Jaejoong’s grinning face inches from mine, smelling a spinning combination of body soap, shampoo and peppermint toothpaste, Yunho standing by the bed with his hands in his pockets.
“We have to get the Shim brothers to Nine today. I think we should prepare them,” Yunho informed me, replacing his morning greeting with a fist bump that I lazily met with my own.
“I’m up,” I said, rubbing my eyes to chase the remnants of sleep away. Jaejoong clambered of me, instead jumping into Yunho’s already expectant arms. As always, I was the last among the three to wake up, with both Jaejoong and Yunho already dressed for the day ahead.
“I think we should take the brothers together,” I said as I sat up, “Easier to handle them that way.”
“Nine will take them.”
I froze where I was. “What?”
“Yoona has informed me that Nine will be retrieving the brothers for safe transportation.”
I snorted, getting over my shock at the ridiculous piece of news. “’Safe transportation’. They're probably just afraid that the location of HQ will get out. Knocking them out too, no doubt.”
“There is nothing we can do about it. It’s for the better.”
I nodded along, not really in the mood to argue. “And what time will they be coming to retrieve the brothers?”
“Yoona Umma said after we’ve left,” Jaejoong piped in, not wanting to be left out of the conversation.
“After we’ve left, huh? That would be around six thirty. What time is it now?”
“Six,” both Yunho and Jaejoong answered at the same time, their amusement loud in their voices.
“Crap!” I cursed, running to the bathroom. “Wake me up earlier next time, why don’t you!”
I came out my room at 6:27 am, dressed hastily in skinny magenta trousers and a slightly oversized white tribal sweater. I had to grab a beanie since my hair was a bedhead disgrace and my Vans weren’t even laced up properly when I passed by the door of Changmin’s room. Something made me backtrack for some reason, made me knock on his door once as I entered the room.
I was already used to see Changmin awake at odd hours of the day, and seeing him look up, a towel hanging from his head, in a change of outfit, was no different.
I closed the door behind me, wanting this to be a secret between us as I hastily came forward. His look of confusion was evident as he took a step back, unsure what was going on. I raised my arms to show I was unarmed, though in reality I had enough weapons under this outfit to immobilize a whole class of ninjas.
“Changmin, I’m not here to cause harm, but I just had to inform you. Kangta will be sending his men over to collect you and your brother when Jaejoong, Yunho and I are gone. Do NOT, under any circumstances, react violently to them or raise a defense, not even an offense, against them. The men coming to retrieve you are trained to kill at a drop of a pin, and even if Kangta hasn’t given a get-go to kill you, they won’t be afraid to hurt you bad. They will probably knock you out with some drugs to take you to Nine if you cooperate well, so *please*, don’t do anything that will make them twitch.”
Changmin could only blink in surprise at my flurry of words, taking another unsure step backwards, till his knees hit the edge of the bed and he dropped down on top of it, his face still a blank mask of uncertainty.
“I’d leave the door unlocked, but I can’t have Kangta think that we let you roam around the house freely. We’re going to try our best to get on his good side today so please work with us alright?”
Jaejoong’s voice rang in the house suddenly, breaking the tension building up in the room.
“Chunnie hyung!” he practically screeched, “We’re going!”
I exhaled loudly, forcing myself to meet Changmin in the eye. “I need to go. Please be careful, Changmin.”
I turned to quickly exit, not waiting for a reply from him as I locked the door and bounded down the stairs to see Jaejoong, Yunho and Junsu standing at the door, Yunho holding the door open for me.
“What took you?” Yunho asked me, his hands on the steering wheel as he drove around a corner.
Winter was getting ferocious, hitting its peak in the form of a blistering cold. We had to drive the SUV once again, since it was the only vehicle with chained wheels. Even then, the constant swerving the SUV made due to lack of grip on the frozen roads made the four of us buckle up from worry.
Nine was but a half hour drive away, extended slightly due to the difficult roads and we managed to reach the place by 7:25am, five minutes before ‘assembly’. And even then, the four of us were caught off-guard when the high pitched humming hit our ears.
It should’ve been something we’d expect, but the day off from Nine must’ve thrown us off slightly and all four of us lost it in the lift, Jaejoong reacting particularly violently, since it had been sometime since he had undergone this due to being away at the asylum.
***********
I woke up where I expected to be woken up though, lying among the other forty or so Outposts who were being awakened with the electric pad on our arms. Instinctively, I searched for Yunho, Jaejoong already by his side, before the four of us headed out for training.
After running and some simple evaluations (we had to miss the pain limit tests due to us being on a mission), an attendant met with the four of us in the changing room, saying Kangta requested our audience. Yunho’s eyes met mine, a hidden message conveyed between us before he nodded.
Instead of taking the lift to the forty third floor however, the four of us traveled down to one of the bottom floors, knowing exactly where to go as we headed for the prisoner compound. The guard questioned our presence, but made no argument when Yunho gave him the eye, keying the fifteen digit password and handing Yunho the cell key as he did so. You could probably feel the man shrinking in our presence, as if he was aware that the four of us could snap his neck just because we wanted to and get away with it. And with that in mind, I held on tighter to Jaejoong’s hand, keeping him close to my side so he wouldn’t run off.
We walked down the compound, systematically built like a maze and littered with guards in the unlikely event that a prisoner would escape. Prisoners here were many, as it was usually a stop-by place for criminals that posed as threats to national security. Treasoners, terrorists and political whistle blowers were common here, as well as the occasional Outpost locked inside for solitary confinement. The three of us, excluding Jaejoong, had enough knowledge and experience of this compound to know that it was never a given whether you’d come back out alive. Cases of suicide from prisoners here weren’t exactly rare and although it was protocol, it bristled me that Changmin and Karam would be locked in here. This wasn’t a place they should be in, even if momentarily.
Yunho led the way. He knew the place the best. Jaejoong clung on to me for a while, before he demanded to be carried, unsettled by the darkness, compact space and narrow hallways. After several moments of walking among twists and turns, we stopped in front of one of the many steel reinforced doors, marked only by a serial number engraved on the door to differentiate between the prisons.
The key was inserted into the keyhole that was exactly in the middle of the door, and once all four of us were inside, we had to walk down a short pathway that lead to a secondary door, one where we had to use the key again, but this time as a doorknob to open the door. It was quite literally maximum security at its best.
We entered to see Karam and Changmin on the floor, unconscious with a black sack over their heads, wrists, knees and ankles bound together with steel cable ties. The room was set to be uncomfortably stuffy, and both were wet with sweat. I could feel my anger grow at the unnecessary precautions taken. The brothers were being treated like animals used for testing. Beside me, the only word that could describe the look in Yunho’s eyes right now was rage. Cleverly hidden rage as his body maintained unaffected, but his eyes burned with a fire I couldn’t even begin to describe. Pure fury was perhaps something akin. Jaejoong squirmed to get off me, running to Karam, and then Changmin, his fingers quick to unravel the rope tied to the sacks, unveiling both brothers with hair plastered to their face, and bruises around their neck from rope tied too tightly.
“Yoochun, get them out of here,” Yunho’s command was sharp, calling for immediate heed.
I moved quickly, scooping Karam into my arms and standing to immediately exit the prison compound. There were bruises on Karam that weren’t on Changmin and a twist of guilt claimed my gut as I regretted not informing the younger brother of the soldiers coming to retrieve him. Yunho slipped out after me, Changmin in his arms as Junsu stayed behind to lock the prison once more and retrieve the key. Jaejoong ran ahead, already memorizing the way out of this maze.
We took the lift, the six of us, to the Fixers for maintenance. Neither brother woke up, which was thankful and at the same time worrisome. They hadn’t been overdosed, had they?
The Fixers retrieved both Changmin and Karam without comment nor question, and the four of us left immediately, not wanting to leave Kangta to wait for a moment longer. Besides, both of them were in good hands. We had some of the best doctors and most advanced technology for the Outposts. If the Fixers couldn’t heal them, then no one could.
I didn’t know how I actually felt about that thought.
We entered the office to see Kangta and Yoona, Kangta standing as he leaned against his desk, Yoona standing by his side as she silently conveyed what seemed to be an urgent topic to him in silent whispers. Kangta’s face was a blank mask, his eyes focused on nothing in particular, which was strange enough in itself, his arms crossed, as Yoona seemed to be convincing him of something, a very hard set in her eyes.
She looked up at our entrance, the tirade of moving lips suddenly stilled.
“Yunho. Jaejoong. Yoochun. Junsu. Come in. Sit.”
We did as told, not even Jaejoong working up a ruckus. Kangta looked… troubled? He had run his hand through his hair twice, arms still crossed, constantly looking away. I had just noticed the file that lay on the desk by his side. If I focused hard enough, I could only just make out the name Han Changmin, typed out in unmistakable Times New Roman font. I wonder who that was? As to my knowledge, the Changmin with us was surnamed ‘Shim’. What was his importance? Was he the cause of Kangta’s distress?
“Report,” he commanded, though it didn’t even look like he was paying attention really. I began talking, because honestly, I was the only one awake during the most of yesterday. I omitted out the part where Yunho fell sick though. I didn’t really need that.
I gave the most concise recount I could, from Changmin’s reaction when he woke up, to when both brothers tried to escape individually. I explained their fever, their injuries, omitting Changmin’s conversation with me.
I noticed Kangta only properly paid attention when I was speaking of Changmin, how his eyes seemed to unfocus so very slightly at any report that wasn’t about Changmin. How his biceps contracted at the mention of Changmin.
Something was definitely up.
“And how are both brothers?” Yoona asked, standing beside her husband in a near identical pose, though of course she didn’t look as tense as him.
“Both show signs of being over their fevers. It is very much likely that the fever was brought on by the stress of what happened. I cannot confirm that they are both fully healed, as both are naturally physically weak, but as to what I saw, both brothers were fine after a night’s rest,” I explained, never breaking eye contact with Yoona.
She nodded, knowing that I was done with my own report.
“Yunho. Do you have anything to report?” she asked him in turn.
“Negative.”
“Junsu?”
“Anything that would require being covered has just been done so by Yoochun.”
“Jaejoong?”
“Nope!”
She nodded again, straightening as she turned to the direction of the door. “Very well. Bring in the prisoners.”
The change in Kangta was unmistakable. He closed his eyes, a fist resting against his lips. His shoulders drooped slightly as he took in a deep breath. My eyes immediately turned to Yunho for clarification, but he shook his head, saying he could see the changes too, but didn’t get it either.
It was like Kangta was steeling himself for something to come. Something huge.
I could hear the brothers coming before I could see them. As usual, their untrained footsteps were loud and easy for our trained ears to detect. They were heavy, inconsistent and I could hear someone stumble. They were still heavy on the drug.
And then I could hear a knock on the door as the attendant asked for permission to enter.
“Enter,” Yoona said, being the only one among us to be fully facing the door, her arms still crossed over her chest.
The door opened and an attendant entered, bowing to all of us, before she backed away to let Changmin and Karam in. Both brothers came in slowly, looking delirious. Fear was something evident on their faces as they stepped inside, the cables thankfully taken off them. Guards surrounded them, in case they would make a random decision to bolt.
Karam only looked towards the floor, and I could tell the fever was starting to pick up from where it last left off with him. He swayed slightly, wobbling with each step he took, a hand clutching on to Changmin’s jacket. Jaejoong stood without being asked to, and came to his classmate, placing a comforting hand on Karam’s elbow. The message between the two of them as they looked eye to eye with each other was obvious and I found myself relaxing slightly at the exchange.
But what had my attention however, wasn't the exchange between the two classmates, it was that between Kangta and Changmin.
Kangta was rooted to the spot, his eyes on Changmin, unmoving and unsure. Changmin was slow to notice Kangta in the room, but when he did, he seemed frozen as well, his jaw slightly open in shock.
He said one word, one word that created a great chain reaction among everyone that was in the room.
"Hyung," he gasped, voice soft from shock. "Chil Hyun hyung."
And he came forward, walking as if the world posed no threat to him, as if the man he had just called hyung wasn't the one who was determining his fate, who determined whether he lived or die.
And he came forward and wrapped his arms around Kangta's neck, hugging him as if he was a childhood friend he hadn't met in years.
And Kangta, the leader of a government organization specialising in national security, the man who raised monsters called Outposts, the man who was unafraid to kill just to display his power, the man who made Yunho's heart stop, hugged him back, wrapping his own arms tightly around Changmin's waist.
Unmistakably, undeniably, I heard him say one word as well.
"Changmin."
====================
Already halfway through the draft of the next chapter, and I can't wait to post it up!
Hopefully the next chapter will provide y'all an insight to what happened between Changmin and Kangta.
Months of planning is finally loeading up to my most anticipated part to write about!! >.<
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