“I thought we are one. What made you leave the group? Our fans expect us to make them happy. They want us to stay together for better or for worse. And now, you’re leaving? How dare you do this to the group, to the company, and to our fans? Are you in your right state of mind? Just what kind of person are you, Kris? You’re not thinking about the people around you. You’re only thinking of yourself. Do you know how near our solo concert is? You don’t deserve to be a leader. You're so irresponsible!” Suho blasted out on the phone, shouting out all his shock and anger. Kris was in another place, far from his brothers, somewhere in the big city of Guangzhou, somewhere he didn’t want anyone to know.

He knew it all along. He knew how his decision would make the people around him confused, angry, frustrated, shocked, and even intrigued. He knew how the world would judge him like he was never good, like he was never human. He knew how many of the fans, who were once like puppies trying to grab his attention, would transform into monsters, ready to eat him up. He knew it; he knew it all along.

“Kris? Answer me,” Suho interrupted the long silence which Kris had thrown at him.

“Um...,” Kris replied, tears of glass welling up at the corners of his eyes. “I...I’m…I’m so…sorry,” he stuttered, heart wrenching with pain.

“You’re sorry? YOU’RE SORRY? If you’re sorry, take back that lawsuit! Admit that the decision you made was completely stupid and reckless, and apologize to all of us! If your 'sorry' is really sincere, do what I’m telling you right now!” Suho yelled as he burst out into tears too. Exo was still a rookie group, and the fear of losing a member already was all too real.

Kris was at a loss for words. His eyes, already swollen, reflected nothing but extreme remorse for Suho, for Exo, and for all their fans.

On the other side, Suho already had puffy, tear-stained eyes as he handled the phone, with Kris on the other side of the line, volume on loud speaker so that the other ten members, Exo's managers and SM staff could hear the whole conversation inside their small dorm room. They were all speechless, just waiting for Kris to say something. The other ten members were shedding silent tears, but Tao and Lay were crying the most. 

 “Kris, please…,” Suho's voice interloped the silence once again, but now he sounded gentle, even pained. 

“I’m…I’m sorry…I’m so sorry,” Kris stuttered again, “I’m sorry for making a decision without making you know beforehand. And I’m sorry, because I just can't undo what I've already done. I’m so sorry for making you all shocked. And I’m so sorry for disappointing you too much.”

The tone of his voice made it clear that he didn't want to talk about his lawsuit anymore. People close to him knew that Kris was a man of his word, and that when he made a decision, he would stick with it until the end, no matter what. Everyone in the room, at that point of time, realized in their hearts that it was useless to continue hoping for Kris to change his mind. It was the end of the conversation. There was no hope left.

“Suho, can you give the phone to Tao?” Kris suddenly asked, his voice low, tinged with the colour of tears.

Without a word, Suho handed the phone over to Tao, who was sitting right beside him. Tao, however, being one of the people most affected by Kris' sudden decision, took the phone, but placed it on his lap. He was too weak right now, too weak to hear Kris' voice again. His hands went to his eyes, rubbing frantically at them, trying to wipe away the tears and pain.

“Tao?” Kris asked hesitantly.

There was no reply.

“Tao? I know you’re there. Listen to me, please, Taozi. I’m really sorry for not letting you know. I thought that if I told you, you would try to stop me. I knew that once I saw your tears, I wouldn't be able to go on with the lawsuit, so I made up my mind not to tell you. Tao, I hope you understand. I'm not forcing you to understand my decision straight away, but I hope you'll think about it and understand why I would do this in the future. I’m so sorry. I love you. I love you so much,” he sobbed.

The echoes of tears going through the line told Kris that the others could probably hear what he was saying, and so he added gently, “To all of you guys there, Yi Xing, Luhan, everyone, I hope you'll understand why I did this. I love you all.”

Kris, already feeling a weird kind of pain in his heart, pressed the end button on his phone.

---

Kris' lawsuit preceded one of the worst times for Exo as a group, and also one of the worst for their fans, Exo-L. Everyone-- the remaining members, SM staff, and the fans-- felt frustrated and angered by it. People were addressing Kris, asking him to speak up, to take back his decision. Many were commenting, tweeting, posting messages that were crying for Kris to come back. SM made continuous efforts to contact Kris. However, it didn't matter how many messages were posted, and how many people cried, because nothing would happen. Kris' decision was his and his alone, and it was final.

Why did he break his word that Exo would be together forever, that they are one? Did he only say it because he was forced to say so? Wasn’t there a time that he sincerely and whole-heartedly said 'We will be together forever'?

Perhaps, somewhere deep inside his heart, Kris still remembered what he had once promised.