The first time Nichkhun wakes he has his nose pressed against the crook of wooyoung’s neck. He’s wedged between the backrest of the couch and wooyoung’s side, with wooyoung’s shoulder as his makeshift pillow. Wooyoung has an arm around him and nichkhun has his own hand clutching the front of wooyoung’s shirt. He shifts under the blanket, trying to untangle his foot from where it rests, but then wooyoung’s arm moves and now there are fingers carding through his hair gently.

“ Sshh...it’s okay.” wooyoung whispers softly, his eyes still solemnly shut. “ we’re okay… everything is okay now…” his voice trails away.

Nichkhun places his head back down, this strange comfort setting in his chest. He watches the way wooyoung’s hand finds his, his palm enclosing around nichkhun’s wrist while his other hand still moving against nichkhun’s scalp gently. He’s warm and nichkhun feels--, safe? Oddly safe from the nightmares, this feeling that nothing can harm him, them, anymore just because wooyoung says so and nichkhun’s still too clouded with sleep to start dissecting and analyzing of why he takes wooyoung’s word for it , he just--, he just does.  He trusts wooyoung. He trusts him with his life. He doesn’t know how, or why, it just kind of happened, the way the sun rising from the east and setting in the west kind of happened, it just is. Nichkhun can hear the sound of wooyoung’s soft breaths, the way his lungs expands, and the faint thump of wooyoung’s heart beating lulls nichkhun back to slumber.

The second time he wakes he can see wooyoung sitting on the smaller couch adjacent to his. It’s dark outside and wooyoung has his glasses on, an open book in his hand. The reading light makes his face looks so serene, and for a moment, he does look familiar. Nichkhun’s mind can’t find a trace of memory about him, but in his heart, wooyoung feels familiar.

“ you’re here.” Nichkhun rasps, his throat dry and burning but he doesn’t want to move, doesn’t want to take his eyes away from wooyoung. “ you’re alive.”

“Yes, I’m here, and I’m fine.” Wooyoung answers him, “ go back to sleep. It’s still a few more hours to sunrise.” For a moment nichkhun thinks that wooyoung will smile to him, but wooyoung doesn’t. His face is unreadable although his eyes are kind.

Nichkhun breathes out, curling in on himself more, he’s determined to stay awake, determined to etch wooyoung’s face on his memory so he will never forget him again. He doesn’t know why, but it feels important that he should.

“ I’m not going anywhere. Go back to sleep nichkhun.” Wooyoung says when he catches him staring.

When he wakes up for the last time, it is bright outside. Nichkhun stirs and eases away from his blanket, throwing his feet down and sitting up on the couch. There’s no sign of wooyoung anywhere although there are books on the table, showing nichkhun that what happened last night weren’t just another dream. His dream though, his dream was clearer. He can see wooyoung in his dream, which never happened before. wooyoung died in his dream, he remembers the blood, this terrible way he felt when he thought wooyoung was dead. Nichkhun lifts his hand to press against his heart where a dull ache is throbbing.

“You awake?” Wooyoung shows up, the door leading inside is swinging closed behind him. “ you can wash up and help me with breakfast. “ wooyoung says, crouching down in front of a large cabinet, pulling out a folded towel and a toothbrush to give it to nichkhun after. “ how do you feel?” he asks.

“ I’m fine. Thankyou.” Nichkhun answers.  And he is, he’s never felt so refreshed before. He’s had a good sleep, and he wakes up without the drowsiness his meds always gave him that made his limb felt like lead. “ how’s your leg?” he asks back.

“ better.” Wooyoung lifts his pajama pants to show nichkhun his ankle, the swelling visibly gone. “ just no jumping around for a while.”

“ that’s good.”  Nichkhun nods slowly.

“ I suppose.” wooyoung straightens his tee, pausing when nichkhun doesn’t continue. “ have you..” he hesitates, the corner of his lips turns downward, but then he inhales deeply and gives nichkhun a small smile instead.“ bathroom is just down the corridor, when you’re done you can find me in the kitchen, we can have breakfast and, …and we can talk. “

Wooyoung makes coffee, adding three packs of creamer into his own cup before stirring slowly. “ sugar?” he offers nichkhun.

Nichkhun stares at wooyoung, “ two cube please.” he answers,  saying nothing about the creamers.

“ Chansung’s gonna be here in a half an hour to pick you up, “ Wooyoung passes him his coffee, sipping from his own cup quietly before setting it down on the kitchen counter to get back to his sizzling pan. “ I hope you like pancakes for breakfast, I’m out of toast and I haven’t had the chance to do my groceries.”

“ exam week?”

Wooyoung makes this humming sound, turning to place the last pancake on the serving plate, and then bringing the pan to the sink. He unties his apron after, folding it and setting it aside. It’s all very clean, very methodical and it reminds nichkhun of himself, of his daily routine, and he wonders if wooyoung had morning visitors before, or guests that spend the night in his place, guests that stays for breakfast.  It drives an unknown itch under his skin, thinking about wooyoung sharing his nights with someone, someone nichkhun doesn’t know, someone wooyoung met while nichkhun was still oblivious about the people he left behind here. It shouldn’t though, wooyoung is his friend. Wooyoung trusts him to be his friend. But didn’t wooyoung say they’re not friends? Wooyoung must’ve hated him so much that he refuses to acknowledge their past friendship.

“ khun? Khun hyung? Yah, khun hyung!” Nichkhun snaps back from his thoughts and finds wooyoung shaking his head while placing a few stacks of pancake into nichkhun’s plate, one corner of his lips curls up to form a faint grin.  “You still like to space out I see. Sometimes I worry about you, you know. Always looking so lost and confused about everything.”  wooyoung chuckles, sounding amused but as soon as nichkhun catches his gaze, his chuckles tames down and his expression moulds into something careful, he clears his throat. “ sorry,i.. I didn’t mean to laugh.”

“ no it’s okay.” nichkhun smiles, “ I am confused, of a lot of things, actually.”

“ ah , that.” Wooyoung breathes out, getting a few pancakes on his plate as well. “ we’ll get there, but first we eat. Most important meal of the day and all of that.”

There’s a tub of ice cream on the table nichkhun hadn’t seen earlier, wooyoung must’ve brought it when he’s lost in his own thoughts.

 “ let me show you the best way to eat pancakes,” he declares, giving three generous scoops on top of their plates respectively before putting it back in the fridge and sits down on his seat again. “ don’t eat them just yet, wait until they’ve melted a bit and I promise you it’s going to be the best breakfast on earth.” He says with this spark in his eyes.

Nichkhun knows that, he knew that, he made the same exact breakfast for years, and that couldn’t be a coincidence, could it? not with three packs of creamer in wooyoung’s coffee. These habits are all too similar, too familiar but when he’s about to open his mouth and say something, Wooyoung pokes his tongue out and drags it along his lower lips slowly and the mere memory of how those lips had felt in his mouth--, warm, yielding, pliant, --scatters whatever words forming on nichkhun’s mind. There’s a row of yellow mugs on the cupboard, yellow plates stacked neatly and few glasses in various yellow shades and Nichkhun tries to focus his attention there.

“So, ..do you have them often, bad dreams?"  Wooyoung asks carefully.

Nichkhun shifts his gaze to his plate, the ice cream is starting to melt slowly. “ nightmares, ---night terrors  my shrink used to tell me.”. He doesn’t like questions, questions left him feeling vulnerable, and he doesn’t like feeling vulnerable.

“ chansung told me--, “ wooyoung pauses, worrying his bottom lips before continuing, softer this time, “ chansung told me, that you haven’t been sleeping well.  I never thought..”

“ never thought it means me kicking and screaming in the middle of the night?” Nichkhun snorts quietly, risking a glance to wooyoung’s face.

Wooyoung doesn’t smile back.

“I had them since the accident I guess, the nightmares. I lost my memories and got them instead. Not a fair trade if you ask me. But it’s not that bad.” Nichkhun says, and then realizes he’s lying, it is that bad. “ I mean, I used to have medications to prevent them from appearing, or just to lessen it a bit. But i--, I flushed them down the toilet a few days ago.” He chuckles bitterly.

“ why did you do that ?” wooyoung looks at him.

Nichkhun looks up to see wooyoung. Wooyoung seems genuinely concerned, he doesn’t have that sorry look nichkhun despises so much in people whenever they hear his story.  Boohoo, poor kid lost his memories and now he gobbles on pills just to keep him sane at night. , the last thing he need is another pity party.  Luckily, wooyoung seems to understand that, sitting there looking soft and young with his bed hair and simple tee, the dip of his collarbones peeking daringly through the neckline.

Nichkhun clears his throat, forming the words in his head and fighting the temptation to cave under wooyoung’s eyes, to avert his eyes anywhere but wooyoung’s. He takes a deep breath instead, “ because I’m tired. I’m tired of suppressing it. I want the nightmares to stop, and I was hoping if I can get my memories back, if I can remember things then maybe the nightmares will go away? And that’s why I’m here, after all these years.  God, it sounds so selfish now, I know.” He runs a hand over his face in a slight frustration.

“ It’s not selfish.” Wooyoung tells him.

“ it is.” Nichkhun deadpans, something building up inside him,  “it’s just that--, me, the younger me , the me that you knew, that everybody here knew, had a happy smile. That Nichkhun had an honest happy smile. I don’t have those. “ Nichkhun starts. “ I don’t remember the last time I gave anyone a sincere smile, a smile that I don’t have to fake to make others thinks I’m okay. Truth be told, I don’t remember how “okay” feels like. I wake up every morning and--,  and I do these things, these routinity and goes autopilot throughout everything, and I don’t hope for anything. I don’t wish, I don’t dream, I don’t want , I just don’t feel anymore, about anything in my life. I don’t--, I don’t feel anything inside, Wooyoung. I live my life because it’s there for me to live. I simply, …exist. And that’s not living, is it?”

His daily routine flashes before his eyes and Nichkhun realizes just how much he hates everything. How it’s so hollow and empty, cold and grey and wrong, so so wrong. Like it wasn’t supposed to be this way, like he was missing something but he can’t quite figure out what.

“ Khun..” Wooyoung holds his gaze, a discerning sadness shrouding his eyes and nichkhun feels guilty for that too.

He must’ve looked so pathetic to Wooyoung, but Nichkhun doesn’t care, he doesn’t have enough strength to keep it all in anymore. He’s been holding it inside all these years, not saying anything to anyone because he knows he’ll get them worried, but that takes a toll out of a person. Standing tall when he’s crumbling inside? Nichkhun had enough and if by tomorrow Wooyoung thinks he’s crazy then so be it.

“ it feels like the part of me that loves life is gone with my memories. The part of me that fights, that hates, that wants, that loves passionately. The part that makes me feels alive. I want that back. I want me back. “Nichkhun breathes out. “I want to know who I took to prom, Wooyoung. Did I get wasted there? Did I score with any girls?” he chuckles sadly.” I want to know which teacher I like, or dislike, or did I ever had detention and was it worth it. I want to know my favorite food and movie. I want--, God, I want to know everything. “Nichkhun tries to control his breathing. 

The ice cream has partly melted but neither man lifts their fork. Each lost within their own thoughts. Wooyoung is the first to break the silence.

“ Samgyupsal.”

“ im sorry?” Nichkhun lifts his head and sees Wooyoung staring at the table, he looks troubled, conflicted, but he has a small smile when he meets Nichkhun’s gaze.

“ your favorite food, Samgyupsal.” He lifts his shoulders. “ I don’t know what’s so good about it, Samgyetang tastes better if you ask me.. But well, it’s Samgyupsal for you, can never have enough of it.”

Nichkhun stares blankly, almost not believing that Wooyoung is actually telling him this. “ Damn.” Nichkhun tilts his head, remembering the time he liked the food instantly when he tried it with his sister. Turns out he liked it even before he can remember it. Maybe he didn’t completely forget after all, maybe, maybe there’s hope.

“ What?” Wooyoung asks.

“Nothing.” Nichkhun answers, then his eyes lights up with a thought. “Favorite dessert?”

“Anything sweet. You have a sweet tooth; you used to have stashes of candies to go everywhere.”

“sweet like in vanilla ice creams?” Nichkhun prods, catching the sight of the partly melting strawberry ice cream on his pancakes.

“nope. strawberry.” Wooyoung smile gets wider, lifting his fork and starts working on his own pancakes, beckoning Nichkhun to start eating.

“ strawberry? Not vanilla? “

Wooyoung laughs and he looks so beautiful it almost hurts to look at him. “ Vanilla is my favorite. I used to force you to get vanilla whenever we visited the ice cream parlor so I can talk you to share yours with me later on. Works every time.” He shakes his head in amusement.

“ Works every time? Why? “ Nichkhun asks, feeling a smile creeping on the curve of his lips.

“ because you love m--,” Wooyoung pauses and clears his throat, shrugging as he focuses on his food again. “ because you’re too gullible I guess.”

“ How about girlfriends? “ Nichkhun asks with a grin.” Did I have one back then?”

The smile on Wooyoung’s face fades a little. “Nope, no girlfriend.” He says, bringing another fork full of pancakes into his mouth.

“ There must be someone, a girl.” Nichkhun insisted. The couple’s ring in his possession is hard evidence that he did had a romantic relationship when he’s in high school. “Maybe someone I took to the prom?” He tries again.

“Yeah, well you went to the prom with me. ” Wooyoung says with a snort. “ …and I sadly informs you that no, you did not score with any girl that night. No girls. ”’ He smiles, looking slightly embarrassed.

Nichkhun leans back, feeling rather disappointed. If Wooyoung doesn’t know this girl then Nichkhun doubts anyone else knew. But Wooyoung seems honest, or maybe he’s just a better liar than Chansung? But again, why would he lie? He must’ve known something about KY initials,  it wouldn’t hurt to ask. Nichkhun opens his mouth, a question teetering at the tip of his tongue.

“ Park Jinyoung.” Wooyoung beats him at the second.

“ Excuse me, what?”

“ Who, not what. “ Wooyoung swings his fork. ”Your favorite teacher. Park Jinyoung. He teaches music, and composition and vocals and all those things.”

“ I sing?” Nichkhun asks, incredulous. Because he has heard himself singing in the shower and to be honest, imagining him singing to other people is rather tragic.

“ Well yes..” Wooyoung answers, lifting another piece of pancakes into his mouth.

“ Was I very good at it?”

“ Well, no…” Wooyoung gives a half amused answer. “  you were decent though, and you have a very soft, very sweet voice…and it’s good to see you giving your best. I’m a fan of your voice by the way.” Wooyoung looks at him, eyes filling with admiration, adoration? Nichkhun can’t really say, because wooyoung turns his gaze back to his food, clearing his throat. “ anyway,  piano was your passion. Your thing. You were very good at it. Very very good. So good that you earned a scholarship to Juilliard. Your family was very proud.”

“ J- Juilliard.?” Nichkhun widens his eyes. He never knew this. No one in his family even mentioned about music to him. His choices were between business major or medical, like his father, like nichan, there’s nothing about music.

“Yes. It was-, what was it…” Wooyoung closes his eyes, brows furrowing together.” The…, umm, The Florence Dubinsky Scholarship in Piano . “ he states proudly, “ or was it Duschak?, something like that . anyway, you showed me the letter and we got cupcake overdosed celebrating it. ” wooyoung grins.

“ but that can’t be.” Nichkhun shakes his head, because this is ridiculous, they didn’t even own a piano back home. He never touched a piano in his entire life, or so he thought. “ I don’t--, I don’t even play the piano. “

“ What?” Wooyoung chuckles, but the smile freezes when he realized Nichkhun is telling the truth. “ but you were--.”

“ I can’t play the piano, Wooyoung.. I don’t remember that I can. They never told me I can. ” They never told him anything, and at this point nichkhun wonders what else his family is not telling him. and bloody hell, why?

“  tell you what, “ Wooyoung says after the silence stretches too long between them, he’s wiping his mouth with a napkin slowly, carefully , pausing for a moment before continuing . “ finals will be over in a few days, after that I can take you around, yeah? See if we can get you to remember things. It looks like you and Chansung hasn’t gotten any progress.”

“ Does this means we can be friends?” Nichkhun asks point blank.

“ is that what  you want us to be? Friends? ” Wooyoung asks back, quiet and careful. Careful of what? Nichkhun wonders. He knows most of the landmines in his family, things not to talk about, but here, what are the landmines that his friends all seems desperately to avoid? Something about his past relationship for one, and Nichkhun intends to find out more.

“ of course I’d want that.” He answers firmly, looking straight to Wooyoung. “ I want us to be friends.”

“ then we are. “ Wooyoung smiles after pausing for a moment, pushing his chair back to take his empty plate to the sink.

Friday is short and gloomy; it edges around lazy rains and dark clouds that hide the sun. It’s been raining for a few days since he’s back from Wooyoung’s house, Chansung picks him up in the morning and Nichkhun remembers this look on Chansung’s face when he sees the both of them; Chansung was all smile, as always, but he’s also holding something back, being careful. It feels like everyone around him was holding something back at some point.

 Nichkhun types in the last few words of his email to extend his “ vacation”  and sends it back to his office, stalling for a moment as he think about the life he have back in the states. He checks his phone and sees three missed calls from Tiffany. How are you, he imagines she’d say. I missed you, she’ll probably adds and Nichkhun bites his inner cheek, couldn’t find it in him to even say I missed you too when he doesn’t, he doesn’t miss her and he doesn’t want to lie anymore.

Nichkhun leans back on his chair, tired muscles relaxing as he stares onto the rain drizzling outside, the droplets falling against the window pane in front of his desk in Chansung's guest room. Wooyoung agreed to help him; this was a good progress, because although chansung is nice, it still feels like he’s not telling nichkhun the whole story. Wooyoung makes him hopeful, even if wooyoung won’t tell him much, being with wooyoung left him feeling like he’s getting somewhere.

Nichkhun presses the heel of his palms against his closed eyes. He tries not to think about it, about how wooyoung really makes him feel, about the warmth spreading through his heart whenever he remembers the way wooyoung holds him.  wooyoung was everywhere, his hands gentle on nichkhun’s back, on his cheek, his hair, wooyoung’s forehead pressing against him, arms wrapping around his shoulder, his body warm, solid, his voice soothing him, his scent lingering longer than it should in nichkhun’s memory.  And nichkhun tries to not think about that kiss, but the faint tingling he feels on his lips wouldn’t let him forget. Nichkhun runs his fingers carefully along his lower lips, he can still feel it, the warmth, the soft pull of Wooyoung’s lips between his own, the way it feels right when it should’ve felt wrong.

His phone vibrates again and he knows he should probably pick it up. Instead he takes another sip of his coffee, made with three packs of creamer, the way he always made them. The same way Wooyoung made his own coffee a few days ago, he noticed when having breakfast in wooyoung’s house.

A knock on the door takes Nichkhun back from his thoughts and he can’t believe his eyes when he turns the door knob and finds Wooyoung standing there, wearing a pink shirt, a baseball cap, red shorts and white chucks. Chucks. Nichkhun can’t help but smile. “ You look very..summery.” he points out. And very teen-ish , especially when wooyoung is not wearing his glasses today, but nichkhun doesn’t say. 

“  it’s getting warmer.” Wooyoung shrugs. “and you, sir, are not picking your phone up. “ Wooyoung raises an eyebrow up and somehow it pleases Nichkhun that Wooyoung is acting smug, seeing the smile quivering at the corner of those lips.

“ oh, that was you? Sorry, I thought--, I guess I’m not feeling like talking to anyone today.” Nichkhun steps back to let Wooyoung in.

“ what? not even to me?” wooyoung walk passes him, and nichkhun notices the difference in how wooyoung carries himself. He’s lighter, more laid back, “And I’ve left the warm comfort of my home, battled through the horrendous rain to actually come here and see you, nichkhun buck horvejkul how could you, I am devastated.” And friendlier, definitely friendlier.

“ horrendous rain, is it?” Nichkhun asks, already grinning back.  “ I thought the news only said slight drizzle.”

“ it’s a terrible terrible drizzle,” Wooyoung takes his cap off once inside and fixes his hair. 

“ I see.” Nichkhun nods. Wooyoung’s hair looks soft to the touch, and from this angle he seems almost angelic. Nichkhun let himself drink in the sight for a moment, pulling his focus away when wooyoung put his cap back on.

“ cos you’re not in the talking mood ,  how about we do a lot of listening today?” wooyoung doesn’t wait for a reply. “ You. You get ready, “ he gestures at nichkhun’s sweatpants and tshirt, “ and I’ll wait here,” he says before going to the living room and flopping down on one of Chansung’s couch.

Is wooyoung taking him somewhere? Nichkhun wonders.

“ well go on then, we don’t have all day, we have buses to catch, places to go~ ” Wooyoung says when nichkhun still hasn’t move from where he’s standing. Nichkhun grins; wooyoung is definitely taking him somewhere.

Two bus rides later, they arrive at a large building. Red brick walls and rows and rows of windows welcome them. The rain finally letting up and the sun is peeking shyly from the clouds.

“ but Wooyoung this is..”

“ My school.” Wooyoung turns to Nichkhun and smiles. “ our high school.” He continues, walking towards the entrance, not even waiting for Nichkhun to follow him from behind.

Nichkhun’s brow knits together, trudging footsteps over Wooyoung’s invincible trail trying to understand the reason why Wooyoung bringing him here. Wooyoung suddenly stops when they’re a couple of feet from the main door, turning and spreading his arms wide as if he’s welcoming a tourist group.

“ this is where we begin.” He declares, the afternoon sun drawing shadows upon his face, Nichkhun could see his loop sided smirk. “I’m going to take you to relive the days in the life of Nichkhun Horvejkul, seven years ago.”

Wooyoung has, it seems, asked the teachers that once taught them (and is still teaching to this day in their school) to give a little of their time to reminisce the Nichkhun that they remembered.

It feels somewhat ironic, Nichkhun thinks as he sits wide eyed and ear focused. That these teachers, people with compassionate eyes and understanding smiles, are sharing him some snippets of his own life. The life he lived and lost. The life his parents never told him. Stories his siblings shy away from.

He laughs when Mrs.Kim tells him the pranks he and his band of six had done ( “especially that Ok Taecyeon and Park Jaebum,” she emphasizes). He listens solemnly when she tells him about the volunteered tutoring he gave and lessons for their special classes for kids with disabilities.  Mr.Son--,their PE teacher, tells khun about how talented he was in swimming, how he at basketball and flourished in athletics.  Mrs.Kang tells him that he was failing in her history class but was better after he was tutored by Taecyeon,  Nichkhun sees Wooyoung smiling  at this and guesses that Wooyoung remembers it too. Mr. Park tells him he’s friendly and caring as an English tutor to his juniors, Mrs. Shim who used to teach math tells him that he’s mischievous, getting into detention repeatedly on his second year for cutting class and gone missing on her class, but somehow, somehow, he manages to score an A on every math test. Wooyoung cleared his throat at that, using his hand to cover the smile forming on his face and Nichkhun wonders if his friend has anything to do with that.

He listens as empty pages being rewritten, lost chains reconnected, pieces of puzzles found, returned to his hands. Although he hasn’t yet know how to put them back together, it is pieces of puzzles more. More than what he would have if he never came back to Seoul.

“ Thankyou.” Nichkhun finds himself whispering to Wooyoung when they walk side by side through the empty corridors, the students being in summer break. His hand reaches for Wooyoung’s wrist, not really feeling like walking alone. He wraps his fingers gently, thumb pressing where the veins pulsates, and Wooyoung lets him.

Wooyoung had sat with him throughout the sessions, and although he was concentrating to the stories, , Nichkhun's eyes would sometimes strays to where Wooyoung is sitting.  Sometimes Wooyoung throws him a reassuring smile, other times a knowing look, or he will be rolling his eyes when the teachers praises him too bluntly. Sometimes Wooyoung would just sits there, arms across his chest as he solemnly listens to the stories , lost in his own reminiscence , his face stills and quietens with eyes wandering far, far beyond the walls and doors, through stretched years and time barriers to find two boys, carefree and jovial in their high school uniform seven years ago.

Sometimes Wooyoung wouldn’t be sitting, sometimes he’s standing up, looking out through his office’s window, the afternoon sun falling gently on his face, painting the outlines with delicate warmth. In all those times, there’s not one where Nichkhun doesn’t think of Wooyoung as anything less than beautiful.

“ That was our spot. They build the fountain a few months ago there, cut down all the large trees, all that’s left was that old bench.”  Wooyoung declares when they’re out, pointing out on a bench in the further part of the school’s yard, secluded if not for the fountain build right next to it. “ Well it was my spot, but you used to skip classes and followed me there.”

“ on math classes?” nichkhun prods.

Wooyoung laughs, lightly, wonderfully.

“ the audacity of skipping math classes to take naps and whatnot. tsk. You’re lucky Mrs.Shim didn’t fail you.”

“ I was getting straight A’s , how can she fail me?”

“ yaah, I end up tutoring you day and night , don’t you dare act all smug.” Wooyoung smacks his arm, his tone playful. “ Insufferable.” Wooyoung mutters under his breath, the corner of his lips curling to a smile.

Nichkhun wonders what it was like for Wooyoung. To wake up one day and found his dream crushed, the best friend who he shared his high and low nowhere to be found. Maybe in some strange way fate did dealt Nichkhun a better hand. Maybe forgetting was better than remembering. The horror of being fully aware of all the hurt and pain while pushing through to move on.

 There’s an overwhelming pull surging inside of him to move closer, to tug Wooyoung and wrap him in a heartfelt embrace. A hug too long overdue that Nichkhun feels he owes his bestfriend. To make up for all the lost time, the unsaid words of consolation, the shared smiles that never happened.

It’s the bitter sting of disappointment he tries to shake off in the end when Wooyoung takes his hand back and pries his wrist free from Nichkhun’s grasp. “ Come on, “ he said lightly, oblivious to Nichkhun’s conflict. “ we still have so many place to go to.” He grins to Nichkhun.

The wind blows soft on his fringe and Wooyoung’s warm warm smile reminds him of a summer sun stored somewhere deep in his memories.

a/n. thankyou all for the comments and im sorry it took a while to update, shoutout to jamie for holding my hand  in this!