Tiffany felt like her whole world, so carefully stacked together, so fragile and beautiful and perfect, was crashing down around her.

She clicked on another tab, as another article about how Nichkhun had gone to the S.M. agency building just to visit her appeared, and more comments came up speculating that they were on a date and said they always knew she was a shameless flirt who couldn’t keep to one guy and was indecisive, and how Tiffany probably only used T.O.P as a rebound and how their whole engagement was probably a sham on Tiffany’s side–

People actually thought she was cheating on Seunghyun with Nichkhun.

She slammed her laptop shut, head spinning as she felt a loud throbbing start to build up behind her eyes and she realized that she was about to cry.

Tiffany hadn’t cried in ages, and she knew that it’s because of Seunghyun, her Tabi who always made her feel drunk, intoxicated on a potent concoction of his love and her own, who always cared for her and and made her feel like she was flying. She understood then why Taeyeon is always so afraid of the future even when nothing has happened yet because all of a sudden she’s terrified at the thought of losing Seunghyun.

It felt like she was reliving a nightmare.

“Fany.” Jessica was there all of a sudden, a slim hand light on her shoulder and Tiffany looked up dazedly.

“Jessi….”

“T.O.P. oppa is on the phone,” Jessica said quietly.

Tiffany only stared at her, eyes wide and dark and confused as Jessica nodded encouragingly, holding out Tiffany’s slim iPhone that she vaguely remembered leaving on the kitchen island when she first got the call from Sunny to look at the news portals.

“Trust him,” Jessica whispered, and Tiffany obeyed helplessly.

“Tabi?” her voice was tight, tears threatening the edge of her vision.

“Miyoung,” his familiar voice was deeper than ever, laced with relief and some other emotion she couldn’t quite identify.

“Seunghyun, I didn’t know–” she choked on her own words, her voice thick.

“Are you alright?” He cut in worriedly. “Wait, are you crying right now?”

Tiffany really did cry then, tears falling like diamonds as they rolled down her cheeks while Jessica stood, moving towards her worriedly.

“No,” she denies it but of course her voice breaks right then, betraying her lie.

Are you alright? he said. Are you alright?

“Don’t cry, Miyoung,” Seunghyun murmured comfortingly. “It’s alright, it’s okay.”

“Are you mad at me?” she asked timidly, fragile and vulnerable.

“What?” He sounded incredulous at the thought. “No – no, I’m not. Miyoung, I know you well enough to trust you.”

The tears dropped onto her hands, sparkling diamonds that shivered on her glittering ring as she bit her lower lip. “Nichkhun….he did come to see me, Seunghyun.”

“Miyoung,” he said firmly. “Did you know he was coming?”

“No–”

“Did you meet him with any intention of cheating on me?”

“What?” Tiffany’s face blanched. “No!”

“That’s all I need to know,” Seunghyun said calmly, and Tiffany blinked, her lashes long and wet against her cheeks.

“What?” she repeated.

“I’m coming over right now. Wait for me, I’ll be there in ten. I love you.” The phone clicked, and Tiffany looked up at Jessica blankly.

Jessica reached out to hold Tiffany’s hand comfortingly as she gathered Tiffany against her slim body, smoothening her hair, her voice low and soothing.

“I told you, you can trust him. He trusts you too.”

“It’s alright,” Seunghyun repeated softly as he held Tiffany against his chest, the tears on her cheeks now drying. “Your manager oppa said it himself, they’re handling the press releases and the whole thing will blow over soon. If you react calmly there won’t be a problem and this will all die down in a while.”

Jessica’s voice was an unintelligible murmur in the kitchen before the volume picked up slightly and fell again.

Tiffany only looked up at him with dark, wide eyes and he sighed, drawing her to the couch. He pulled her close to him as he smiled fondly.

“Miyoung, everything will be fine,” he said hurriedly as her eyes welled up with fresh tears before she brushed them away quickly.

 “I was just really afraid,” she confessed in a whisper, simultaneously emboldened and frightened, spurred on by the gentle affection evident in Seunghyun’s face.

“Of what?” His eyes were open, trusting.

I was afraid of you not trusting me, Tiffany wanted to say. I was afraid of you leaving me just like Nichkhun did. I was afraid of losing you and the same thing repeating all over again and then never being able to pick myself back up the second time, not again.

But all that came out was a weak excuse. “It’s just such an awful rumour. How can people be so mean, so hurtful?”

“We’re still celebrities,” Seunghyun reminded her gently. “No matter what we do, there will always be people thinking the worst of us, and we’re never going to be able to escape that kind of scrutiny; at least not for a few more years.”

“Is this all worth it?” Tiffany asked him as much as she wondered to herself. “Do you think this is all worth it?”

He looked at her, surprised, before his eyebrows drew together in worry at the sudden doubt in her voice.

“I ask myself that a lot too,” he said carefully, slowly. “Almost all the time, especially right at the start. I didn’t understand why people said hurtful things without thinking or caring simply because we were celebrities and were supposed to have been prepared for a life like this, being in the public consciousness.”

“And what…” Tiffany cleared , eyes dropping to her fingers that were intertwined so closely with his and a memory rose unbidden, to her mind’s eye, of another strong, warm hand that had been so familiar around hers even as it felt so wrong.

She swallowed, hard. “What did you eventually figure out?”

“I don’t know,” he murmured, eyes unseeing. A long finger traced spirals of fire around her wrist and hand, leaving a trail of heat in its wake. “I think, after some time, after realizing I can’t change a thing, it felt pointless to wonder.”

Seunghyun paused then before shrugging sharply.

“It didn’t stop me from still wondering, but I think it’s worth it. Making the music I want to make, standing on stages for people who adore me and want to listen to me rap, who cry and scream when they hear my name….It makes it worth it.”

Tiffany fell silent, mulling over his words before he poked her cheek.

“Penny for your thoughts,” he smiled.

She leaned her head against his broad shoulder, fitting perfectly in the crook between his shoulder and neck. Tiffany clung shamelessly to him like a lifeline, her hands knotted in the fabric of his shirt as she breathed him in.

“Nothing – I was just thinking about how life would have been if I hadn’t uprooted myself from America and come all the way here. At fifteen.” Tiffany mused aloud, remembering the noisy girl with an American accent and pure, unadulterated passion for music who still existed somewhere inside her.

“I must have been crazy.”

“Yeah, you actually still are.” Seunghyun said, his tone dry before he sighed almost comically. “I don’t know how I keep up with you, really.”

Tiffany elbowed him, laughing before she grew quiet again.

“Thank you, Seunghyun.”

“For what?” 

Tiffany buried her face in the crook of his neck, smelling his familiar scent and she just wanted to stay there with him forever.

“For trusting me. For loving me.” She mumbled indistinctly into his shoulder, lips moving against his skin as he laughed, the whole action making their bodies vibrate together in unison like two halves of a whole. Seunghyun was never one for much skinship – unlike Tiffany, who was a wholly different matter –  and he was hardly ever the first to initiate contact. He seemed to have a personal philosophy of physical distance being healthy in a relationship, but he always responded to skin-to-skin contact, and Tiffany knew he loved being near her, skin brushing against skin, never more than a fingertip away.

He touched her now, his expression fond and gentle as she tipped her head back expectantly.

“Tiffany,” Seunghyun started, before she raised her eyes to meet his. His pupils dilated and he spoke again, low and rough. His fingers brushed away the residue of salt water on her cheeks gently before he cupped her face. His low bass voice wrapped around her name like a caress this time, curling around the syllables lovingly.

“Miyoung….Just remember, trust and love are not mutually exclusive for me. ”

“Thank you, Tabi,” she returned, her tone almost as low and tender, her smile softening into a sweet and private and intimate smile Sunny so often called the Miyoung look that belonged to Seunghyun and Seunghyun alone.

Seunghyun kissed her then; sweet but not chaste. She smiled into it, breathless and longing as she looped her arms around his neck.

Tiffany pulled him even closer, seeing the pinpricks of light in his eyes that glowed like stars, and she felt like a meteor had just knocked all the breath out of her as it set her on fire. Tiffany closed her eyes and just let herself unravel in his embrace, falling apart in his arms, feeling like she was burning in him, in that moment.

A/N: The next few chapters will involve a lot more KhunFany and TaeNy than TOPFany because I need to resolve KhunFany and exorcise all their ghosts for real. But to all fellow TOPFany shippers, stay patient because I wrote one of the sweetest fluffiest chapters yet. Like, I was literally squealing to myself at two in the morning while typing it out. Anyways. Much love!