Title: Where Are You?
Author: Natalie1093
Characters: Kim Jong-woon/Yesung&&YOU

.o0o.
“Where Are You?”

“I’m sorry..”

“For letting you go..”

“But I had to..”

“I hope you’d understand..”

“That I had to let you go, only for a little while..”

“But someday, I’ll find you..”

“And I’ll make it up to you..”

“Where Are You?”

.o0o.

““Once Upon a Time in China, there was a boy and a girl. The girl was like a princess but the boy was a pauper and that meant that they can never be together...” Hankyung from Super Junior started his own version of Ren… ahh... I forgot the author’s name. But I know the book he’s reading is very famous, it’s even more famous in his home land, China.

I looked over at the other members who were also listening were wearing expressions of sadness and understanding for a reason that I do not know. All the members were listening to Hankyung’s story, all but one.

“Kim Jong-woon” I mumble his name to myself as I look away from his gaze.

No, he was no longer Kim Jong-woon. He is now, Yesung from Super Junior. I stole a glance from him, he was still looking at me, and he looked like he saw a ghost. My heartbeat raced as he continued to send daggers at me. I tried my best not to notice and listen to Hankyung’s story, as the head teacher in the orphanage it would be rude not to listen to a guest who took their time to visit and take care of the orphans.

“Teacher Jung..” a small voice said. I looked down to see Little Gyuri holding up her arms, wanting me to carry her. I look at her, such a pretty girl. I pick her up and cradle her in my arms. I took this as a chance to escape from the crowd and from him. I took Gyuri outside with me to the playground, it was deserted. I sat down on the bench with Gyuri still in my arms. I looked blankly ahead, I could feel Little Gyuri squirming around in my arms and playing with my curls, she giggles and cooed as she plays with my hair.

I turn around to look behind me, I could see clearly that Hankyung-sshi was still reading the book but while he was reading, I heard a piano being played softly, and I shifted my eyes and saw Kim Heechul’s back facing me, playing the piano. The song he was playing was very beautiful. It seemed as if it was for someone special, a song that will never let you forget. I turned away and closed my eyes as I held little Gyuri in my arms tight and warm as I start to remember myself and him before everything fell apart..

[ Flashback ]

“Congratulations! To Graduating class of ****!!” Our principal congratulated our class from the stage. We, the graduating class were ecstatic and threw our caps in the air. At that moment, as I look up at my cap in the air, total darkness covered me.

“Yah! Who is this?! I’m blind! Nooooo!” I said as I was still trapped in darkness. I touched the hands that covered my eyes. I smelled my captor’s sent and at that I knew who it was.

“Yah! Kim Jong-woon! Get your hands off of my eyes!” I commanded and that command, light came back to me. I squinted my eyes shut and rubbed them, as I got used to the light I turned around and punched Jong-woon lightly in the arm.

“Congratulations.” Jong-woon said. I smiled at him as he wrapped his arms around me, pulling me into a tight embrace.

“Oppa, I can’t breathe.” I complained. Jong-woon said, even though we were the same age, he was a bit older than me. I noticed he was holding a bag, I wonder what it’s for.

“Ahh, your such a killjoy ____ah.” Jong-woon said while threatening to ruffle my hair. I stopped him in the nick of time.

“Oppa, I really put a lot of effort in making my hair look pretty.” I said as I push his hands away. I looked around; everyone has taken off their togas and was now wearing their clothes for the graduation party. I decided to take of mine. I wore a simple white dress.

“Uwaa~ pretty.” Jong-woon said. I looked at him as he looked at me from head to toe. I blushed and tried to hit him again. Only to be dragged away by my friends away. As I try my hardest to escape their grasp, they hold on to be tighter and continue to drag me away from him. Unknowingly, I stretch my arm out to him while he watched me being taken away, with a gentle smile on his face and waved at me. I wanted to shout at him, say it to him…

“Saranghae..” that word lingered on lips, but again, I couldn’t confess.

[ End of Flashback ]

“Teacher!” Another little voice squealed. I broke away from my thoughts as I watched all the kids come out of the building to play; of course Super Junior was right behind them. At the sight of children coming out to play, little Gyuri squirmed in my arms, I let her go and she came running to her friends. I was again, alone.

I watched all the members run around and play with the children. Their leader, Leeteuk was really good with kids, but he seems to favor the playground merry-go-round. He didn’t seem to want to separate himself from it and some little girls would want him to be on their side as they ride it, around and around and he didn’t seem to mind. I smiled; he’d make a good father. At that thought, my eyes wandered until my eyes set upon him.

“Oppa..” I mumbled to myself. I kept repeating it to myself as I watched him play with the kids. Regret and guilt washed over me and my heart wrenched. My placed my hand in my pocket and took out a piece of paper. It was pink folded paper crane, I flipped it to the other side and read what was written on it.

“ Jung _____, Saranghae.”
I brush my thumb over the words. I drift back to my thoughts, the sounds of Super Junior and the children drowning as I continue to look at the piece of paper.

[Flash back]

“Whoo~”

Newly graduated students ran around as if they were released from captivity as some partied and played games. All of us were in a hotel, where we’d be having an after party/2 days and 3 nights stay. I sighed as I watched them from my room. I wasn’t really into parties. So here I was, in my hotel room, bored to death.
*KNOCK KNOCK*
“Who could that be?” I asked myself as I step away from the window and walked over to the door. I opened the door, I was surprised. In front of me was the one I wanted to confess to so long, Kim Jong-woon.

“O..Oppa, what are you doing here?” I asked him. He looked at me, not saying a word. God, his eyes would make you melt. He didn’t answer, instead he let himself in. I was startled; I’ve never seen him act this way. What’s going on?

He sat on my bed, his back facing me as he blankly watches through the window, I just stared at him, as the moon shines on him. I could feel my heart race.

“I’m going to Seoul tomorrow.” He said breaking the silence. My eyes widen in shock, he was going to Seoul. Suddenly, he turned around, smiling at me. My heart soared and broke at the same time.

“But before I go, I have to do something very important.” He said and patted the bed, instructing me to sit next to him. I did what I was told. My heart beat faster as he was so near me.

“Here.” Jong-woon said as he hands me the bag. So this bag was for me.

‘Ah, thank you.” I said quietly and looked down at the bag. Jong-woon looked at me; I looked down at the bag.

“Well,open it.” Jong-woon ordered. I nodded my head and opened the zipper. My eyes widened at the surprise inside.

“Uwaa~ Paper cranes! So many~. Oppa, Thank You.” I said as I gave him a hug. I broke away to touch the paper cranes.

“Open one.” He said. I took one out and unfolded it. I was surprised at what was written on it.

“Jung _____, Saranghae.” He said what was written on the paper. I cried, why now? Why did he have to confess to me when he was going away? My heart hurts, I finally received love from him but in the end, I have to give it up. I cried harder.

“I’m sorry it took me so long to say it.” Jong-woon said. I cried even harder. He turns my shoulders around to face him. I couldn’t look at him, it hurts too much.

“___ah don’t cry.” Jong-woon said as he lifted my face up to meet his. I sniffed and cried and hiccupped. He smiled sadly at me and brushes strands of hair from my face.

“Oppa*hiccup**hiccup* Oppa, Sarang*hiccup* Saranghae.” I said. He smiled at me.

“Saranghae.” He answered back. In a few moments, his lips touched mine. My eyes widened in shock and eventually I closed my eyes and kissed him back. I felt like sparks were flying everywhere and bells were ringing. The both of us kissed endlessly, not noticing the party, the people below even the firecrackers show outside. All our senses were for each other ,for no one else but for each other.

.o0o.
Sunlight disturbed my eyes, I stirred in my bed and turned to my side and found it empty. I opened my eyes and sat up. I rubbed my eyes and tried to recollect myself and tried to remember what happened last night, I looked down and lifted my blanket. I quickly covered myself with the blanket. I felt my face turn red.

“Omo..” I said to myself. I realized that Jong-woon wasn’t in the room. Could it be?

I quickly ran to the bathroom to prepare myself to go outside and look for him, silently praying that he hasn’t left.
.o0o.

I got down to the lobby where everyone was there; I went over to his group of friends.

“Excuse me, where is Jong-woon?” I asked them. They fell silent my heart raced and wrenched.

“He…already left _____-sshi.” One of his friends said. I looked down in disappointment. He left without even saying goodbye.

“Ah, is that so.” I said and turned away, I walked slowly but I couldn’t hold my tears any longer, I ran for the elevator and when I got inside, I quickly pressed the close button and cried on the floor.
.o0o.
I entered my hotel room like a zombie, lifeless. I was so tired from the crying I did in the elevator. I just want to lie down on my bed and die. I dragged myself to my bed and laid down on it. I was about to close my eyes forever when I spotted something.

I sat up and reached out for the bag. I opened the zipper and saw the paper cranes, I don’t know how many there were but it wouldn’t compare to the broken pieces that my heart has. Suddenly, I noticed something pink. I took it out and it was a pink paper crane, which was slightly bigger than all the others. I flipped it over and saw his handwriting.

“I’m sorry, I love you.”

I swore my eyes were dry when I went in the room. I swore my eyes hurt from shedding so many tears that if I were to cry again, it would be impossible. If I were to escape that impossibility, I would have shed blood. But why? Why am I crying again? I placed the pink paper crane on my heart and cried.

[ End of flashback ]
I sighed and was about to put the crane back into my pocket when a voice stopped me.

“So, you’ve kept it all these years?”

I slowly looked up and saw, Kim Joong-woon, no..Yesung in front of me.

“Ahh, Yesung-shhi. An nyoung ha se yo” I stood up and greeted him. I couldn’t look into his eyes, his piercing eyes.

“Jung ____ ah, what happened to “Oppa” huh?” Jong-woon said, no…Yesung said.

“Ah.” Was all I could say.

“Let’s take a seat.” He said, I nodded at sat next to him. After all these years, I still feel the same.

“How have you been?” Yesung asked me. I shrugged in reply. He sighed.

“____ ah, listen. I’m sorry without saying goodbye.” He apologized.

“It’s okay, I understand.” I said. He sighed again.

“You know, I still feel the same after all these years.” He said, my eyes widen in shock my heart skipped a beat. I turned to look at him, he was so handsome. Then he turned to look at me and smiled.

“Jung ____, Saranghae..” He whispered.

“O..Oppa..” I said, I was about to answer him, tell him that I also still fell the same.

“Oppa!” We turn our heads to see a running Gyuri towards us. In a few moments, Gyuri was in front of us, well in front of Yesung.

“Yesung Oppa, play with me!” Gyuri said cutely. Yesung…no, no matter what calling him Yesung never sounded right to me. Jong-woon smiled at little Gyuri and ruffled her hair.

“Araso.” He said as he stood up. He looked down at me and smiled before I could’ve said anything Gyuri dragged him away. I watched him play with Gyuri. He would’ve made a great father. Guilt and regret washed over me. I could feel tears welling up. He wasn’t the one who should apologize, I should. I’m the criminal. I took a photo from my other pocket, it was a picture of a baby, the most beautiful baby boy you could ever lay eyes on, I flipped the photo over and brushed my thumb over the name written.

“Little Jong-woon”

My little Jong-woon, where are you?

[ Flashback ]

“That’s it _____! Push! Push!” The doctor said. I screamed, the pain was so excruciating, why didn’t I ask for the drugs to make this less painful?!

“Ahhhhh!!” I screamed, why is not he coming out? Little Jong-woon, are you going to be as stubborn as your father?!

“Okay! Push! Push harder!” The doctor said. I pushed harder. God, how harder do I have to push?

“I can see the head! Push!” The doctor said. I pushed harder.

“A little bit more!” The doctor said. I pushed even harder. Kim Jong-woon, do you know how much pian I’m going through right now?

“Ahhh!” I screamed and pushed harder.

“One last push ____ ! One last push! C’mon!” The doctor said. I screamed and pushed as far as I can.

“He’s Out!” the doctor said. I heard a baby cry. I was so tired, I wanted to rest. But suddenly something warm landed on my arms.

“Congratulations, you have a healthy baby boy.” The doctor said. I looked down at the little bundle in my arms. Nine months after that night with Jong-woon, this is the fruit of our love. Our Little Jong-woon.

“An nyoung ha se yo, my little Jong-woon.” I cooed. Little Jong-woon opened his eyes, I was taken back, he had his father’s eyes.

“Miss, we have to clean him now.” The nurse said quietly. I looked up at her; her face was full of guilt. I knew something was wrong. I was hesitant to give little Jong-woon away even for a while. But the nurse took him from my arms and led him away from the room.

.o0o.

“It’s been days, why can’t I see my baby?!” I furiously asked the doctor. Just what I have said, after giving birth to little Jong-woon, I haven’t seen him since. They kept making excuses. I swear, if weren’t still sore from giving birth, I would’ve gotten up form my hospital bed and took me and my baby put of here.

“You can go now,” A voice said, I turned my head to see my stepmother. The doctor left without a word. I gave my mother a cold hard look.

“Child, don’t look at me like that.” She ordered. I raised an eyebrow.

“Why? You’re giving me the same look as well.” I retoreted. She scoffed and walked over to me.

“Here .” She said as she handed a picture. I took it and looked at it. My eyes widened in shock. It was a picture of little Jong-woon.

“What is this?” I asked my stepmother. She looked at me as if I was stupid.

“Are you blind? T\It’s a picture of your baby.” She answered. I looked at her as if SHE was stupid.

“I know this is a picture of my baby. But why are you giving it to me?” I asked her. She looked at me, a smirk formed from her lips. I was afraid, she could’ve have. Little Jong-woon was MY baby, not hers .

“My dear, didn’t you know? I gave up that little bastar—ah, baby away, for adoption that is.” She said sweetly. I got up from my bed, no matter how painful it was and slapped her hard.

“You..you..! You have no right! Give me my baby back!” I demanded from her,as I threw her across the room. I don’t care if she was my stepmother, I don’t care if people would think of me badly. She gave my baby away! How could she?! I was so angry that I could kill her. I gave her a murderous glare and walked towards her, she cowered in fear.

“Please, don’t hurt me.” She pleaded.

“ I never want to see your face again!” I screamed at her, she hid in fear. I walked out of my room. I ran towards the nursery but my baby wasn’t there. I ran everywhere and ached everywhere. I didn’t care about the pain I felt. All I wanted was to see my little Jong-woon.

I ran out of the hospital, and looked everywhere. Tears came streaming down as I shouted…

“Little Jong-woon! Where are you?! Umma is looking for you! Little Jong-woon, where are you?!”

I didn’t care that people were looking at me. I didn’t care that they might think I’m crazy.

“Little Jong-woon! Where are you?!”

[ End of Flashback ]

“I’m back.” Jong-woon said. I looked up at him, tears streaming down my face.

“Omo, ____ah why are you crying.” He knelt down and took my face in his hands.

“I’m sorry Oppa.” I said as cried.

“Why? What’s the matter?” He asked, clearly worried. I cried even harder.

“Jung ___, after all these years you’re still a crybaby. What’s wrong?” He said.

“I’m sorry.” I said again, I was sorry, really sorry. I was sorry that I didn’t tell him I was pregnant with his child. I was sorry I couldn’t protect our baby. I was sorry I deprived him from being such a great father. I was sorry I couldn’t tell him the reason I was sorry.

“____ ah, what’s wrong?” He asked again.

“I’m sorry.” I said again and stood up. He also stood up and placed his hands on my shoulders.

“Tell me what’s wrong.” He said. I looked at him at his pierecing eyes, they have the same eyes.

“I’m sorry Oppa.” I said and ran away. I ran and ran and ran.

“ _____ ah!”

As I heard his voice I ran faster and further until my legs would go weak.

.o0o.

I stopped in front of the Han River. I knew everything would be alright at the orphanage. Jong-woon was an idol, he knew how to act. The children would be fine, the other teachers were here.

I looked at the Han River, I wondered if Little Jong-woon was looking at the Han River right now too. I wonder if he grew up well, have good parents that watch over him, I wonder if he has his father’s voice. I could feel my tears flowing again, Jong-woon was right I was still a crybaby. I took a deep breath and shouted…

“Little Jong-woon! Where are you?!”
.o0o.
“Where Are You?”

“I’m sorry..”

“For letting you go..”

“But I had to..”

“I hope you’d understand..”

“That I had to let you go, only for a little while..”

“But someday, I’ll find you..”

“And I’ll make it up to you..”

“Where Are You?”
.o0o.

Author’s Note: I’m finished with Yesung’s one shot! Next is Kangin’s. Hmm.. can you guess what’s happening for that? XD. Last time, I didn’t get much readers..*sigh*..maybe..the oneshots aren’t good? Anyway, to those who read and comment, I’m very thankful. Please continue to give love and support on my one shots. :D
If you wanna talk on YM just add me up:
Natalie101993
Take Care~