"There are possibilities," Baekhyun started, scribbled on the back of Sehun's failed paper test. There were in the cafeteria without Namjoo and Jongdae, and they hoped that none of them coming anytime soon. "One, Jongdae keep everything inside, Minah doesn't know nothing and keep loving Jongdae until they got grey hair together," 

"And Namjoo?" Sehun asked plainly, didn't really believe what Baekhyun had offered. 

"She flies to the other side of globe and meet the love of his life there," Baekhyun shrugged his shoulder. "Second, Jongdae breaks up with Minah, with the best and polite way possible. Getting together with Namjoo, and they break their hearts again after the separation in the airport. Doing that damn long distance relationship, which wouldn't work out anyway, and breaking their hearts again for the second time. Three, Jongdae keep everything secretly behind Minah; confesses his feeling to Namjoo, and makes her happy in her last weeks in Seoul. And when Namjoo flies to SF, Jongdae still goes out with Minah,"

"And Namjoo?" asked Sehun again. 

"There is a plan hole in number third, right?" Baekhyun grinned after thinking awhile. 

"There are big black holes in the whole analysis, Hyung!!" Sehun pushed Baekhyun's side. 

"Are you sure that you are trying to help Jongdae and Namjoo?" Chanyeol ruffled his back hair, confused. "Because I think you just mention how to mess their relationship, three of them,"

"But we can't help them being together without hurting Bang Minah, dammit!" Baekhyun slammed the table in frustration. "It's just not fair for her!" 

Sehun sighed, agreeing what Baekhyun had said. He pressed his lips together, upset that he couldn't help Namjoo to have happy moments before her flight. 

***

When there was something that made Bang Minah fell in love deeper with Kim Jongdae, it was the promise that Jongdae gave to him in the hospital; and also in the soccer club room. The chance and the try. Jongdae really gave her a chance to prove her heart and her feeling. Never even once, he ditched her or he left her alone. He accepted the cold towel and water from her after practice, while the other members got it from Namjoo or Chorong. He still smiled and said thank you, ignored the boo~choir from the rest of the members (Baekhyun was always the loudest). When she gave him the bento she made, he ate it well, he even said sorry because he always gave the bento to Baekhyun and Chanyeol before. 

He gave her chance to know him better, he said that he didn't like oyster and broccoli. He didn't pretend to enjoy the meal when she put the broccoli in the box, he put it aside or feed it to her. It just made her laugh, and of course she ate it for him, while nagging that broccoli contains so much vitamin that good for his body. Deep inside, she was happy that Jongdae showed her his true self. 

When they went to Hongdae together, although it was always Minah first that clung on Jongdae's arm, he never avoided or dodged her. They still walked side by side, merged as one of couple in love in the middle of the street. No one had ever mistaken them as best friend or cousins, because they appeared like a lovey dovey couple. Then again, she smiled, because he gave her the chance to love him. 

Jongdae also tried hard to become a good boyfriend, and it always had been enough for her. He took her out every saturday night to every place she wanted, visited every restaurant she saw in the magazine. He never said no to her, even to her request to sing over the phone every night. Jongdae even gave an effort when she asked him to meet her friends, he was wearing his best clothes, telling them jokes (that could fit college girls, not full of sarcasm when he was with troublemakers), and even paid the entire meal-- for nearly 80.000 won. 

Jongdae was the perfect man. 

Minah was happy.

But she just felt it wasn't right. 

She knew that she was only the side character of the story. She wasn't that dumb to not notice that there was something going on between the two best friends; how Namjoo stared her boyfriend secretly with longing eyes, faking a smile or laugh every time Baekhyun and Chanyeol teased the only couple on the table. She noticed how Jongdae smiled awkwardly, pretending to be busy with anything on his hand, and after everything calmed down, he would check Namjoo's expression from time to time. He even forced Sehun or Baekhyun to send her home and it was just shined from his eyes, that he was worry about the only girl in the group. Jongdae sent her home, but she knew who was the one he wanted to be with if truth was told. 

Sometimes, it made her irritated if she thought it was not Namjoo-- she was the first who noticed about the striker. Even before Namjoo became the manager of the soccer team, and of course, Jongdae's best friend, it was her who fell in love with Kim Jongdae. So why did she have the feeling that she was pushed aside? 

Minah reassured her self that she was only a human, that she deserved to be a little bit selfish, that she deserved to be loved by her boyfriend. So, it was not also the first time for her to shift her gaze, pretending that she didn't know what's going on. She shield her heart by the answer she got from Namjoo months ago, that there was nothing between her and Jongdae. She just closed her eyes, love is blind, it was like a repeated mantra in her head. 

Jongdae gave her the chance, and he tried hard too-- why should she ruin her own happiness by questioning and being mistrustful of her own boyfriend?

She put an act to manipulate her self, tried to believe that Jongdae really liked her. She said it out loud that Jongdae sang for her every night, not just because she knew that Namjoo overheard her conversation with Yerim and Hayoung, but also to make her self believe that she shared more things with him than namjoo. Being a good girl like she has always been, she knew it was false and the guilty feeling consumed her from inside afterwards. I'm sorry, just a little while, she thought every time. Just a little while, she didn't know how and when she would open her eyes and stop lying to her self. 

Until the time was coming forcibly. Unwanted. Unplanned. 

It was a sunny afternoon when she and Yerim went to the soccer practice, of course with a different purposes. Minah, wanted to pick Jongdae up for afternoon date, maybe they could watch movie together, or strolling in the park, or just visit a patbingsoo cafe in Hongdae, if Jongdae was too tired after two hours of hard training. Meanwhile Yerim, being a part of student council, had to meet the captain or the manager to collect the report of Seoul Soccer Competition. She had to do it alone since Im Siwan said in a straight line that he didn't want to have business with soccer club. 

They were walking towards the club room after they met Yixing on the way and he said that Jongdae was supposed to be there to help Namjoo with the laundry. Yerim tagged along too, because she thought that Namjoo knew about the report things. Kill two birds with one stone; Minah could meet her beloved boyfriend and Yerim could run her errand. 

They were looking each other in confusedness when they spotted Namjoo and Sehun together not far from the club room. Even though she needed Kim Namjoo for the reports, Yerim was smart enough not to bother her. They just felt the atmosphere was not that bright after seeing Namjoo crying on Sehun's shoulder, with the boy's hand over her head, soothing her. 

Minah frowned while walking towards the room, having a bad feeling that she would hear something bad, whatever it was. But they were just a step away from the club room, and the voice inside were too loud, they could hear everything from behind the door. 

"… Yah Kim Jongdae! You are kidding right?" They heard Chanyeol's loud voice. Minah grasped Yerim's arm, gestured that they should stop where they stood right now. Yerim looked at her friend with frown, is she planning to eavesdrop? 

"Wait… are you saying that you kissed Namjoo? On the lips?" Minah held onto Yerim's arm tighter, this time to seek support for her body which suddenly lacking strength after hearing Baekhyun's voice. They could feel that Jongdae nodded after hearing Baekhyun's next question, "And you were falling in love with her… since… since… the first time?"

It was not like Minah didn't know his true feeling, but hearing directly from him like this was really breaking her hearts into pieces. She could draw the picture in her mind that Jongdae also nodded to the second rhetoric question. Yerim looked at Minah's pale face, felt anger filled her veins. Who do you think you are, Kim Jongdae. Damn you. She was ready to barge in when Minah held on to her hand, felt lost and wanting to go from the place as soon as possible. Yerim managed to keep her anger inside and guided Minah to go away. They still could hear faintly when Baekyun asked, "… you are still falling in love with her, aren't you?"

Minah keep holding Yerim's arm tighter. It seems I can't close my eyes forever. 

***

To: Bang Minah 

Were you not coming to practice today?

"What the hell!!!!!" Yerim screamed in frustration, reading Jongdae's message in Minah cellphone. The owner was still leaning her head on Hayoung's shoulder, tired of crying. They could still hear her sniffle between her breath. Good thing that Minah's house was empty so they could scream without being scolded. "Why is he still sending you message like this-- after breaking your heart into pieces?" 

Hayoung sighed, "I'm mad too, but Jongdae didn't know that she found out about his true feeling," Minah was starting to cry again after hearing Hayoung's statement, while Yerim glared the tallest of the group with her anger eyes. 

"Dammit!" Yerim threw Minah's favorite stuffed animal on the bed after seeing Minah and Jongdae sticker photo in a frame, it made her angry. 

Minah wiped her puff eyes, and whispered behind Hayoung's shoulder, "I knew…" Yerim and Hayoung turned her head, "I knew it all along… his feeling…" 

Hayoung frowned, "What did you say, Minah-ya…"

"I said I knew," she repeated, "That Jongdae likes Namjoo for a long time…" she covered her face with her hands, crying again, making the two friends around her broke their hearts too. "I just decide to close my eyes… hoping that someday he would like me back, genuinely…" she let out a dry laugh, didn't dare to look her friends in the eye, "But, it's just too obvious that it won't happen, right?" 

*** 

Jongdae had promised Minah to be a good boyfriend and that's what he was trying to do for the last three month. He was genuinely trying to like Minah back, and like she said before, gave her chance to show her feeling. Three month being together with Minah was long enough to know her routine. She always greeted him the first time in the morning, through a kakao talk message. Sometimes it was just a simple Good Morning, Have a good day! or mostly with a question, Could you sleep well? Did you dream about me last night? It was also not rare that he got a bunch of lovely emoji. Jongdae was truly liking the content of the message, it was more then once or twice that he found he smiled like an idiot over her cute and bubbly text. Three months were also enough to know her habit. It just took her ten minutes the longest to reply his message. If she was busy, for example when she had a radio broadcast, she would text him back with one word reply (and about ten hearts icon, making him asked his self why she didn't just ignore the message because the it was not very useful). 

So that's why when he texted her last night and he didn't get any reply, he knew something was off. It made him frown when he sent another message and still, didn't get any reply, even though he knew that she read both of them. When he called her an hour later because he was worried, instead of her usual bubbly voice, he got a 'talk to you tomorrow'-- something that he had never gotten in three months of relationship. Today was also the same, that was just too strange that he didn't get any of her morning message. 

It was maybe just because of unimportant habit but he knew something happened with Minah, that's why he was standing in front of her door right now. But it wasn't Minah that he was facing, it was Kim Yerim, her friend. And her face showed that she wasn't pleased by his visit, "Yerim-ssi? Can I see Minah? Is she alright?" Judging by her appearance, she slept over in Minah's house last night. She was wearing a long cardigan over her pajamas. It looked like she was going out in a rush after knowing that he came. 

"Alright?" she repeated, let out a clear scoffed that made Jongdae frowned, "Are you asking me if she's alright?"

"Did something happen?" Jongdae dared his self to ask. He really didn't expect that kind of welcome he would face the first time in the morning, from his girlfriend's best friend. 

"Did you finish playing with Minah's feeling?" Yerim asked sarcastically. 

"What are you talking about?" Jongdae frowned deeper. He was right after all, something happened with Minah over night. And it wasn't something good. 

"So you lied for three months-- making my friend flew to the seventh skies, before brought her back to the ground harshly?" 

Hayoung was coming out, joining her friend, "Yah, Kim Yerim, your voice is too loud. We could hear everything from inside. She is still sleeping…" 

"I know that you seem… angry? But I have to know first, what happened, to sort out the problem," 

Hayoung pressed her lips together, while Yerim held her self not to rant, although an endless scoffs came out from , "We are disappointed, Jongdae-ssi. And now you want to sort out the problem? I'll tell you what the problem is-- you are going out with Minah while you fall in love with someone else," 

Jongdae could literally hear a PANG sound in his head, it was really not something he expected to happen. He could hear Hayoung let out a breathy exhaled, a breathy mad exhaled, before continuing what Yerim said, "She knew everything-- that you love Kim Namjoo for a long time, she overheard your gossip times with your friends yesterday in --"

"STOP IT, OH HAYOUNG!" Minah's voice was heard from behind the door. She went out and looked at his boyfriend with her swollen and puffy eyes. Jongdae could easily guess that she had a bad night, "I'm sorry for the inconvenient, Jongdae-ya… they are just worried about me," 

"Yah! Bang Minah, you…" Yerim was ready to rant when Minah cut her sentence. 

"Sorry, can I speak with Jongdae?" Yerim and Hayoung gave a gesture that they wouldn't move even an inch. "Alone?"

There was no one who started to speak after Hayoung and Yerim went in, they were just sitting side by side in her terrace. Jongdae thought it was one of those day where her mother wasn't around, he was a little bit thankful of it. The last thing he hoped to happen was being busted making Minah cry in front of her mother. 

"I'm sorry…" He knew that words wouldn't heal her wound, but he had to say something in this kind of situation and apology was the most suitable sentence in his mind. 

"You even don't oppose or defend yourself," Minah whispered, more to herself, but still, Jongdae could hear it clearly. 

"I'm sorry that you found out everything through this way," Jongdae sighed, the best way now was telling her the truth. Their relationship was complicated enough and he didn't want to hurt Minah more. He locked his mouth hearing Minah restrained her sniffles. 

"I'm sorry I can't be the one who you want it to be," she said between her crying. Minah looked at him with begging eyes full of tears, "Can't you just-- love me, Jongdae?" She hated him the most right now, how he looked at her still with those warm eyes, not judging, even though she seemed miserable and pathetic.

"You are perfect just the way you are," Jongdae said it, when she looked into his eyes, she was seeing pair of sincere eyes. "But, there is someone better for you out there, Minah. Someone who loves you more than me," he said, "You… don't deserve being treated like this," 

"But I don't want some--"

"Me too," his lips formed a subtle smile, remembering the times he tried to get Namjoo out of his head, "We couldn't force feeling, could we? How happy we were if we really could," 

Minah remembered what Yerim said last night, that she was allowed to be mad at him and not supposed to bottle up her feelings. "Don't smile if you don't want to give your heart to me," Minah sniffled, her lips shaped an upside down crescent. She tried to scold him with harsh tone, but it miserably failed. It sounded like a whining spoiled kid. "You are the meanest,"

"I hope I can give it to you, but I can't," Jongdae took out his handkerchief, wiped the tears on her cheek. 

"Stop being nice to me, Kim Jongdae. You keep rejecting me with nice words," she rubbed her eyes but the tears seemed didn't stop flowing. "Why you keep your promise, gave me the chance, and all? Making me harder to let you go," 

"I'm sorry, Minah," 

"I don't want your sorry," she cover her face with her hand, muffled the sniffling sound. "Oh my god, I look pathetic," 

"No, you are not," 

"I said-- stop being nice-- Kim Jongdae," she took Jongdae's handkerchief and patted it around her eyes. 

Jongdae smiled and her bangs, "You are really wonderful girl, you know. I'm glad it's you," 

Already stop her crying, Minah stared the striker with her puffy eyes, "I'm not glad it's you," she pressed her lips inwards, "It would take a long long time to forget you, you know that right?" she put the handkerchief on the table. "But once I forget you, I won't turn my back," she said again. Jongdae was relieved that this girl seemed more like Minah than two minutes ago, "I wouldn't say yes, even though you got down on your knees and begged me," 

"I know you won't," 

"Soccer team would kill you once they know they lost a faithful supporter," Minah rose up from her seat, felt the urge to go inside before she'd break down again. 

Doing the same, Jongdae brought his eyes in one level with her, "Minah, Thank--"

"And don't thank me--" she wanted to whine and nag for the last time before she caught Jongdae's shiny eyes. The flashback rushed through; all of the short memories they had together was being played in the back of her mind, the chance and the try, "--I'm thanking you, Kim Jongdae,"

"Take care, Bang Minah," he whispered, giving a light squeezed on her shoulder. 

"I won't wish you well, Kim Jongdae," she turned around before closing the front door, giving a last glance to her affection for the last two years, "This is very dumb to say-- and Yerim would be mad at me-- but I won't forgive you if you are not happy with Kim Namjoo,"

a/n

wow. I didn't imagine I would write an entire chapter just for Minah. I think I grew attached to her bubbly and loud character. I tried to make the break up less pain as possible for her (but still ;___;) she's a strong girl and surrounded by great friends. She would be alright. 

I want to make everything's alright before MT (and before SF).

goodbye Minah. goodbye angst chapters. 

next chapter; this weekend (I did a good job not to let you all wait too long, didn't I?).