It's been almost a year or so.

The ring around my finger feels like a second skin.

There isn't supposed to be any reminiscence.

But it feels like a joke. I laughed, really. I suddenly feel like a puppet played by an invisible puppeteer who decided that he missed some melancholy on his makeshift stage.

I laughed when I saw your face.

I stopped when you looked at me.

The look of surprise on your face, somehow it amuses me.

I wonder where did my hatred for you went.

You always have a way with me, Kim Himchan.

But well, it doesn't feel so good to see somebody you don't want to see, does it?

You paled when our eyes met.

My eyes narrowed when you ran away, flustered, nervous and full of anxiety, just like how a cheating ex would do.

I wonder why I didn't just turn away and go off.

I feel the tears forming in my eyes as I walk away.

It's been so long, I was surprised to find the corners of my eyes wet again.

It's such a cruel joke.

Why do we still meet?

Why do the two people who don't want to see each other always meet?

I've been trying to forget but you always appear when I let my guard down, stabbing me straight in the open wound when I'm not guarded.

I hate this feeling.

Trust me, I am equally surprised.

But I only did realise how much I miss you messing up my life when I caught you in the arms,

and kissed you.

I kissed you like you were air when I'm a drowning man.

Yes, I guess I'm drowning.

I'm all tied up without you but I don't even realise until now.

I hate myself for being such a useless trash.

Why do I still come back to you.

I thought I made a decision to never go back to you again?

I thought I made a decision to stop loving you.

But I found out, I've never once stopped doing so.

Old habits do die hard, don't they,

Himchan.