Two Weeks of Cold
Where I Belong
The evening went from bad to worse in Hyunseung’s opinion. Yoseob and Kikwang goofed around as usual in the back of the van, Junhyung grumpily ignoring them while Doojoon sat on Dongwoon’s other side. Dongwoon was paying more attention to what was going on in the far back than whether or not Hyunseung was still fighting tears.
Doojoon noticed without fail. Then again, he noticed anything to do with s. It seemed quite the drastic change from the tense but cheerful boy he’d seen after Junhyung’s reassurances in the studio. That deceptively delicate form was still tense but now in a different way, hands clenched tightly into fists on his knees while he looked out the window. His usually y feline eyes were anything but y now, red rimmed and watery as he fought an inner battle for control over his emotions. A frown marred the leader’s features as he looked the dancer up and down before turning his head enough to look at the rapper brooding in the back seat.
Junhyung had his arms crossed over his chest as he glared out the window, jaw tight and stubbornly set. Occasionally when the two boys sitting beside him would get too out of hand and irritate him too much, he cast that baleful glower onto the two of them. They would quiet down for a brief time, each snickering with the effort of not laughing as they tried to look properly chastised. It never lasted long, and with each recurring time Doojoon could see the rapper’s rotten mood worsen.
Something happened after they all went to the van. That was the only explanation. But what was it? There was no way he’d get it out of Junhyung; the guy was a tough nut to crack in a mood such as this one. He’d sooner dole out verbal whiplash.
When the van parked and the boys all trooped out of the van to meander down the sidewalk toward the restaurant chosen for their dinner, Doojoon hung back from the group. Yoseob had for once seemed to forget him and was happily playing with Kikwang and Dongwoon, loud and boisterous with their spirits high. Doojoon chuckled quietly to himself and shook his head. They’d probably already forgotten about Hyunseung’s promise to explain, which, given the dancer’s current dilemma, was just as well.
His watchful eyes to the two group members in question, who were walking a good five feet apart. Hyunseung was farther ahead, walking with his head bowed and his hands tucked in the pockets of his jacket just behind the excited trio. Junhyung was only a short distance ahead of Doojoon, and the leader shifted his position off to the side a little so that he was closer to the buildings and could see both member’s profiles a little better. While Hyunseung didn’t dare look behind him, Junhyung’s eyes seemed almost glued to the older boy’s slight form, even if they were glaring. Doojoon frowned at that. Now he knew they’d quarreled.
Damn it, hadn’t he gotten his message across to Junhyung in the practice room about not hurting the dancer?
“Junhyung.”
Frowning, the young artist in question turned his head to look over his shoulder. Doojoon’s long strides quickly caught up to him, and Junhyung looked ahead of him again. “What?”
“If you keep glaring at him like that, you’re going to burn right through him.”
“I’m not in the mood for jokes, Doojoon,” the rapper said stiffly.
“And I’m not in the mood to watch you rip one of our members to shreds with your eyes. Whatever you two quarreled about, you’d better fix it before the fans notice.”
“We didn’t-”
“I don’t want to hear it. Whatever happened, when I left him he was not shattered like that. Upset about what happened during filming, yes, but he was recovering,” Doojoon turned a reproachful glare of his own onto the rapper. “I leave him alone with you for two minutes and he spends the next thirty crying in the van. You’re lucky the others didn’t notice.”
“I didn’t make him cr-”
“Save it.” Doojoon snapped. He quickened his strides after that, easily catching up to Yoseob and slipping an arm around his shoulders. He hated snapping at Junhyung like that, but if it got him to fix whatever was wrong with Hyunseung, so be it. Hyunseung was a beloved member, as were all of them, and they could not properly function as a group if one member felt ostracized from even just one other.
During dinner, while everyone else ate and laughed, Hyunseung stayed on the fringes of the conversations. Anytime someone happened to look his way, he would nod and force a smile or mumble something noncommittal in reply, but he made no effort to be an active participant. Doojoon had taken his usual place beside Yoseob, so he didn’t miss the reserved behavior and certainly didn’t miss Yoseob’s puzzled look at his friend’s behavior.
As dinner went on, Junhyung slowly began to wonder if he’d been out of turn with his remarks to Hyunseung. It hadn’t been the type of embrace he’d initially thought, now that he really thought over what Doojoon had said to him. It was no wonder Doojoon had been patting his back like that if he’d been as upset about the filming as their leader had said.
The more he thought it over, the more he really started to feel sick about what he’d said. Especially when he looked beside him at Hyunseung and saw the way the dancer had begun to distance himself again.
Silently, he put a hand over Hyunseung’s on the table, trying to grab hold and squeeze. If he could get his attention properly, he could apologize.
Hyunseung stiffened at once and carefully pulled his hand away, discreetly shifting away from Junhyung at the table. Dongwoon pulled him into conversation and the dancer reluctantly allowed the other members to relieve his tension, eventually rousing that rare soft laugh.
Junhyung was left with the sickening realization that he had unmistakably screwed up.
---
“Yah, Seungie! It’s your turn in the shower!” Dongwoon called out cheerfully as he dropped his laundry off in the dirty hamper. He dropped down beside Kikwang and picked up a game controller.
The dancer looked up from the computer and nodded, logging off his fan site account and abandoning the computer. As he had done for nearly two weeks now, he kept his head down as he passed Junhyung and moved swiftly. The rapper didn’t even have a chance to grab his arm as he would have before his rant at the lithe boy.
Junhyung looked after him for a moment, then turned his attention onto Doojoon. The band leader was laying on the floor of the living room with Yoseob, both freshly showered. The latter was using Doojoon’s stomach as a pillow while he played a video game with Kikwang and Dongwoon. The unmistakable sounds of Mario and the funny music accompanying races wafted through the apartment. Doojoon felt eyes on him and turned his head away from the screen to look at Junhyung as the door to the bathroom closed.
It was clear Junhyung would receive no assistance from him, considering the last two weeks he’d spent more time giving the rapper disapproving looks than he had friendly ones. Junhyung scowled as Doojoon’s attention turned back onto the game, one hand slipping idly into Yoseob’s hair. No, he’d not get any help from him. From any of them, really. Yoseob seemed under the impression that the incidents of that dreadful week had just been too much for his friend, and that was the reason why Hyunseung had withdrawn from the rapper.
If only he knew…
Well, no more. For two weeks Junhyung had put up with Hyunseung’s skittish behavior and a meek but definitively cold shoulder. Time after time the rapper had tried to pull him aside and apologize, but it never worked. The times when Hyunseung didn’t turn tail and immediately scurry off, one of the other members would unknowingly rescue him. Now was the perfect chance. With four members glued to the television screen, three of them locked in a battle with banana peels and tortoise shells, there was no one to interrupt.
Determined, Junhyung strode toward the bathroom.
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