He Bade Goodbye

"Creek," I threw the keys roughly to the side after removing those painful heels. I didn't bother to turn on the lights. It was dark, yet it didn't bother me at all. In fact, it was better to stay in the dark; it made me feel better, it made me safe, it made me feel that I could just hide from all my problems, from the judging world, from everything that I was afraid to face.

I head to the room first and lay down onto the undone bed. It's been a week – 7 days, 168 hours, 10,080 seconds. Yet his scent, his smell continued to linger on the bed. I didn't know whether to keep or to get rid of that. Because part of me wanted him back yet the other half said no. It was difficult, it was tough, it wasn't easy at all and it made me feel like dying. Dying from the torture; the torture with him leaving me. But I know, if he comes back to me, it will be back to how the misery started, to how the arguments formed, with us yelling and spitting venom on each other’s face as we couldn’t tear our pride away. But above all, the silent treatment was the most unbearable and it was exactly why we ended up like this.

Wanting to feel refresh, I stood up from the bed and went up to the cupboard, wanting to pick my pyjamas so I could end another horrendous day. But the moment I open it, tears started forming again.

It was gone, they were gone. The clothes that used to fill up half of the cupboard were gone.

He came to pick them up.

As if it was on call, the voicemail rang. A familiar voice echoed out of it. My feet acted on its own as they picked me up, ran out to the living room and slumped down pathetically beside the telephone.

"Jieun-ah, it's me. I know you wouldn't want to see me, so I came when you're at work. Sorry for all the bad things I've done and most importantly, thank you. Thank you for everything, for all the happiness you've brought to me for the past five years. I’ve left the keys under the door mat; don’t forget to pick them up. And lastly, I hope… if one day, in the future, coincidentally, we bump into each other. I hope… we would be able to smile at each other… like how old friends do when they meet.”

Tears gathered in my eyes as they were threatening to fill up the brim and to fall, "beep." The moment I heard the message ended, those tears streamed down uncontrollably. I hurriedly grabbed the phone and irrationally, I used all the strength that I had to press the replay button. This time with the phone in my arms, I listened to the voicemail message again.

In all honesty, I missed him. So much, very much, too much. To the point where I couldn’t even remember who I was, what I was, how I was.

I missed him, I missed his voice, I missed his touch, I missed everything about him.

"Beep," and again. I quickly hit the button and replayed the message. For that entire night, again and again, without resting, that message was played till I could remember the little details, from when he would pause to take in a breath, to how he would clear his throat to prevent letting out a crack and even the words he said, I could almost memorise them.

And by the time I finally stopped replaying the message, the first sunray appeared. For the first time, I felt so much lighter as I stood by the curtain, opening them slowly. The sunrise was beautiful, just like the previous time, when we stood by here with his arms around me while whispering sweet nothings into my ears. However this time, I was alone, here standing at the same place, looking at the same view but with a different feeling. It was strange yet it was something that I knew I simply have to get used to. The last words that he said to me came ringing in my ears suddenly. I gently placed my hand on the clear window, as if trying to reach out for the sun.

"Till the time when we could smile at each other like old friends," I finally let out a smile, even if it was a forced one, "goodbye Yixing."
 

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Don't expect too much, all the chapters here will be rather short. Well, I don't expect to win anyway, just writing this out of pure pleasure. OTL I don't know what I'm writing anymore. Gonna continue watching Liar Game to fry my tiny brain.