Two hours ago, I was sitting at the desk, my head in my arms and my heart at my feet.  I can’t place it, but yesterday’s elation is somehow fading, and an unpleasant mood is settling in again.  Agitated with my foul temper and the images lurking within the drawers.

Fifteen minutes ago, I was stuck at the door of the apartment, one foot forward to go out, one foot behind me to hold me back.

After many sighs and great reasoning, I find myself standing beside the girl who just might be able to help me find the answers I’ve been looking for. 

Everyone has fear.  It could be pain, the dark, or the dreaded sound of the alarm at six in the morning.  But those things don’t frighten me.  I’ve been through enough pain to last me a lifetime; inevitably, the darker it is, the better.  And, well, I have no alarm. 

What I fear most though, is challenging another human being.  Physically, verbally, and emotionally.  Eye to eye, face to face, there’s no doubt I’ll fall short.

She looks at me with pleading eyes.  But there’s no escaping the spiteful scowl on the lips of the golden-haired man.

“You’re Tao, right?” he says.

I nod.

“You’re the irritable kid that everyone’s been talking about?  The one that does the kungfu?”

So he’s one of them.

                “Just because you can hit people with a stick?”

                Maybe I shouldn’t have come here after all.

                “You think you’re cool.”

                “And how do you know he’s not some super-human with time stopping powers or something?” she says suddenly.  “As much as I can see, you aren’t very good at first impressions. Kris.”

                Her voice punctuates pleasingly at the end of her statement, her words voicing what I tried to say and couldn’t. It’s as if she read my mind. 

For the first time in a long while, I feel…relief. 

* * *

                “So that’s mostly it.  I’m the granddaughter of a chunky eighty-year-old man with a sharp tongue.  And I’ve been at the academy since I was fifteen.  Now, it’s your turn.  Tell me about yourself.”

                I chew on my bottom lip as I give her a repressed look.  “Here?”

                She looks at me inquisitively.  “Why? You want to talk about this somewhere else?”

                “No, I meant to ask if you want to sit here, since we’ve been walking for a while now.”

                “Oh,” she laughs.  “Let’s sit then.”

                She brushes a few dry leaves off the grass as she eases herself into the shade of the oak tree.  Her legs extend naturally in front of her as she rests her back against the rough chest of the tree.  I join her, though I place a few feet’s distance between us. 

                We sit silently as the wind wisps gently over the lake and brushes along our backs.  It’s rather comfortable despite our frivolous encounters before.  

                I watch her twirl a few strands of grass between her fingers.  She’s quieter than I remember and my mind curls and uncurls about what I should say next.

                The way she retorted Kris’ gives me the impression she has a lot more under her skin than I expected.

                It may be because of my very much isolated life, or merely my unfortunately introverted personality, but it takes a while before I figure I should at least thank her, or familiarize myself with her. 

                But there’s something about the way she sits, or maybe it’s the way her lips shine when they mingle with the daylight, the way her eyes light up when she notices that I’m looking at her, that tells me not to disrupt the peaceful silence between us.