All the way on bus Myung kept his head rested against Kai’s shoulder, because feeling that he was just right next to Myungsoo made him feel better, it helped to pull himself together, so he wouldn’t start to cry suddenly. But even if his best friend was there to comfort him, he couldn’t think about anybody else than Kris. Painful and long six years didn’t break his love for the elder, but now, why he was giving up so easily when they both could be happy together again. He wanted to hate Yifan, because he left Myungie alone for so long, but his hate could never be stronger than his love, he couldn’t deny that. Why that stupid jerk had to become so handsome, so others would fall for him as well. Myungsoo was on verge to cry again, he couldn’t help, but hate himself for being so weak and stupid, Chanyeol because he fell for the boy Myungsoo loved for years already and Kris...he just hated Kris because he still loved him, more than he should. It just seemed like time they was apart their love didn’t fade slowly, but growed by days. „We have to get out at next bus stop...” Kai suddenly whispered to boy, keeping his voice quiet since he knew Myung’s mind was full with somewhat and he didn’t want to interrupt his thoughts. Letting out a shakily and heavy sigh Myung nodded and streightened up in his seat again, so they could get up from their seats and get out from the bus.

   Only in few minutes they arrived to Kai’s flat and that actually made Myungsoo more anxious, because he fighted his tears in public with all the strenght he had, but now when they would stay alone, he was afraid that it all may come out once again. All the way until they got here, they didn’t talk, only few small questions or sentences from Kai’s side may escape, but that was all. They exchanged many many worried glances and looks thought, because Kai was worried, indeed, he saw that there was a reason to be. Last time Myungsoo cried so much when Yifan left him, he rarely showed his true emotions anyway, so it made him wonder of what had happened. „Get comfortable...” He said while looking at Myungsoo and then left to put on a water to boil. „Do you want tea?” He asked after he heard that Myung followed him into the kitchen after he took off his shoes and jacket. „Mmm~ Yes please...” He nodded, his voice almost inaudable as he talks. Kai prepared everything to make tea they both liked so much. It was black tea with lemon and sugar, they were the only one between their friends who liked it so much, so every time they were together they always drinked it no matter what. „I guess you’re really lucky. I have some chocolate cake in my fridge left, i bet you want it. It’s really tasty, you will love it.” Even if he tried to bright up the atmosphere, it seemed impossible, so Kai really wanted everything to get ready faster, so they could get comfortable and talk about it faster. ‘Love’...Myungsoo thought to himself. He loved chocolate and cakes, his friends and family and on top of that Wu Yifan. Yet every kind of love he felt for each of the things, people was really different. Maybe he loved Kris just as much as chocolate, he was used to him, he got addicted, just like he got addicted and used to chocolate. But every addidtion could be healed right? People get addicted to alcohol, shopping, but they get better in time, if they’re cured right. So was Myungsoo’s love for chocolate, he would get boring one day of the endless sweetness, he was sure of that, but would he get bored of Kris? Would that be possible? What he was even thinking about...How he could compare Kris to chocolate. A cheap thing, which everybody loved and ate every day, a thing that could be get by money... But He couldn’t buy Kris, he was one and special and, he was something he loved more than anything... Myungsoo feel that his teary eyes watered up again and few small tears quickly rolled over his cheeks again. „Myung...” He heard Kai’s words and felt his strong hands wrapping around his body. He wished he would get out of tears sooner, because it wasn’t something he could bear any longer, crying this much about someone he could get when he chooses not to. Was there anyone who was dumber than Myungsoo? He just wasn’t a kid anymore, who believed that everything works like ‘I saw him first, so he’s mine’. It was different now, much different. „It’s fine, you can cry here now, i locked the doors and no one is going to mess us...” He told and softly rubbed boys back, before pulling back slowly to pour the water in cups where he had prepared tea already. While Myung was deep into his thoughts, he didn’t even noticed the moment when Kai already had placed cake and everything else on plate, so they could move to living room where it would be all comfortable.

  Myungsoo shouldn’t cry right now, he was guest  and Kai was his best friend who was treating him so well, taking care, offering so many things and just...being the best for him now. He should appreciate it at least a little and hold back his tears. Myungsoo was sure, that once he will tell everything to Kai, it should be easier afterwards, right? He should feel better after he will get everything off of his chest, right? He wasn’t sure, but he hoped for the best. When they finally had got comfortable onto the couch, Kai turned his head to Myung and let out a small sigh. „Now, i can’t take it anymore... Tell me everything what you have inside. I have never been so confused before Myungsoo and more than anything i’m worried about you.” With a small nod he let out another sigh. Myung knew that there is no way back now and he needed help from aside, just so he would know of what to do, because he couldn’t figure out by himself for sure. „I-I...”  He slowly started to stutter out the words one by one when he felt Kai placing his hand on Myung’s which was rested onto his tight. It was nice and he was sure that Kai just wanted him to be more confident with talking and telling everything that was bothering his friend. „..Well, when i saw him at school, i knew before already that Kris was in town. While i was sitting in cafe with Chanyeol, he bringed a letter and, i was away at that moment, so i... ah~” Myungsoo let out a heavy sigh. He honestly didn’t knew from where to start, it was a long story actually, but maybe not so long as he just wanted to tell everything and so Kai would understand, facts were just tangling together so much, he had to think over every word before he would make a normal sentence. „No..that’s not it.” He shaked his head quickly and sighed again, just to start over again. „My friend, Chanyeol, the tall one, you probably met him before or at least saw...” He shrugged. „...when i got to this town at first, honestly he was the only one who wanted to be my friend, not only because of my looks, because he actually liked who i was. He didn’t use me to attract girls or boys or whatever, he was just a good friend. Like you are to me. We just knew each other for not so long. But even then, he helped me a lot, to fit in into the new place, support me with everything and he helped me every time when i needed that. I was so thankful to have him, because there was no one else around me at that time.” Myungsoo told to the other, leaning his side a bit against Kai’s. „I truly trusted him and he trusted me, telling me his every secret and everyone who he liked, he told me everything. But i was the jerk, who kept my secrets, not the small one’s. But i never said that i have loved anyone, he still doesn’t know that. He also don’t know, that i have been together with Kris and and...”Other gived Myung’s hand a light squeeze, just so he would know, he had to continue and tell everything. „..When Yifan moved to this city, obviously he had catched many eyes already. Supid jerk.” Myungsoo mumbled with a frown on his forehead. Even if he didn’t want, Kai couldn’t help but his lips just automatically curled up into small smile when he heard that jealous tone of Myung’s. Surely, he still loved Yifan, not matter what and that was obvious. „...and Chanyeol have born in this city, so while he spended his time in here, he had noticed Kris and in this whole time...” He sighed and leaned his head onto Kai’s shoulder once again. „Chanyeol started to really like Kris, even if they haven’t really talked much, he’s sure that he loves Kris and today i found that out. Like i started to tell before, he left a letter for me in cafe, while i was away, but Chanyeol saw him and even if all this time he had told about his big crush, i never really payed attention to the name. Now, i just...i can’t Kai... ” Kai placed his hands on Myung’s hair and ruffled them softly. „You stupid idiot, what’s wrong with you? It’s really everything you cried for?” He asked with almost amused tone. „Aishhh, you don’t understand. I can’t tell Chanyeol that i love Kris, when he does. He would just leave me, because i have never told that before and...he would just get so jealous. I can’t. I can’t Kai, when he’s my only friend in whole class already. I don’t want to be a loner...” He sighed when felt another ruffle on his hair. „Stupid. Kris is waiting for you and if Chanyeol is as good friend as you think, he will totally understand.” He stubbornly shaked his head. „No, no no... You don’t know how much he have fell for Kris, if it would be just another crush, i wouldn’t be like this, but he also loves him, just like me, but not so...strong...” Myung sighed and sadly slumped down against others side. He felt better that he have told somebody,but it still was painful and hard to think of what to do. „Myungsoo, why can’t you be selfish at least once in your life? You can’t be nice all the time and suffer while everyone is happy.” „Well, i am selfish sometimes...” Kai raised his eyebrow and questionably looked at Myung. „Really? When have you been really selfish?” „I was selfish all this time, when i thought and believed that Yifan could be only mine, when i thought that we...” His sentence was interrupted, because Kai had placed his finger against Myung’s forehead and pushed it forward, making boy frown and rub the place afterwards. „Yah, what?” He narowed his eyes slightly and looked up at Kai. „Aish, such an idiot. If you want this to happen fair, then why don’t you ask Yifan? Which one he choose? Then it will be fair. Myungsoo, it’s not your business to decide whatever he should do, expecially in situations like this. Let Kris choose then, let’s see who he will choose..” The only thing he could do was shake his head stubbornly, because at first there wasn’t any good words in his head to tell. But he knew that Kai wasn’t right. It wasn’t something he couldn’t decide, he was one of the players in this game after all. „You know who he will choose anyway, that’s why you said that..” „Of course. Even if Yifan isn’t my best friend, i have spend enough time with him to tell how he feels about you and also i know how you feel about him. Isn’t that enough to let you two be together again? The deep scar he left in you, when he fly away from you can be healed now, Myungsoo. Just let it happen...” Kai said, his voice now soft as he talked and softly caressed Myungie’s side. „I’m scared... Not that we could be happy again. But what if he will hurt me once more? He will finish his school here faster  than i will and what if he will leave again? I can’t take it forever Kai. One or two happy years when there will be bunch of years in pains afterwards.” He couldn’t disagree, that wasn’t right. But what he could tell? Take a risk? That is how life goes? This isn’t a dream, nothing lasts forever and not everything is perfect? „Uh...Then Myung, you should figure it out. What you feel for him, what you are ready for and if you even want to be with Yifan again. You’re right, i don’t want him to hurt you. I won’t be able to see you few more years like you was for those six. It was horrible, to know you’re in pains when i actually can’t help.” „I know already that i still love him. I thought  that i honestly don’t anymore, but when i received his letter, when i saw him, i can’t Kai. I can’t control myself anymore. I don’t want anything else than just be in his hands, feel him, hear his voice. It’s like obsession. And i know, if i will meet him, i won’t be able to hold back, but just break everything i say now. I won’t care about Chanyeol and anybody else, it will be just him. That’s why i don’t...i want, but i know it will be better if i will avoid him now. I lived peacefully so many years. I can last a little more, right?” And after his words Myungsoo sighed heavily, that was the sad truth. He was giving up. „Let’s just give you some time and live like this, you’re right. It should get better soon. But you know, that he will do anything to see you, right? And when i say everything i mean it. I will probably be dead by next time we will meet, because i was suppose to go after you not steal you from him.” He chuckled softly and ruffles Myung’s hair. „Just stay with me and everything will be fine. You know he would never dare to hurt you in front of me.” Myung smiled softly at the ruffle. „I can do that, since my lessons usually starts much later than yours i can walk you to school. And i’m sure i will be fine, don’t worry...” „Thank you for everything...” Boy whsipered and closed his eyes to enjoy the moment. What he would do without Kai...