It’s her song again playing on radio of my Ford. Today I don’t drive the Chevy I used on our first date when she spilled her hot chocolate on the passenger seat. It has her scent up to every corner and we never erased the chocolate’s mark. She likes that one the most. Once, she spent a whole day curled up on the back seat reading novel which led her to this song.

  I still remember what she said about the book. I’m having a love-hate relationship with this one. Sometimes the writing is awesome but at another time this reminds me of those books I hate. Can’t you feel my dilemma?  was the beginning of her three hours review. I remember we were driving to the beach. She had my jacket on.

  I hate the lyrics more than my now neglected Chevy. It has so many questions. On the first three months, I changed all words with profanity every time my chest started to suffocate. I started to smoke, thinking toxic could kill heartache. I stopped a week later, thinking about her.

  I press number one of my keypad, Su Ji’s name still appear now matter how many times I change my phone. The annoying tone which won’t lead me to her voice rings. Thinking it’s still half of the song, it’s not too late to share her the song. I just want to tell her the answer is dust particle and hope she’ll give the answer for the other one question.

  The phone end at the same time as the song. I change the station; her song is playing again for the third time today.

  I turn off the radio.