ANGELA

I managed to wake up a little earlier than usual so that I could have ample time to cook Kyuhyun a little something to make him feel better before I go to work. Perhaps some Cream of Mushroom soup will do. I know I mentioned before that I couldn’t cook but for the past 2 months that I had been here, I managed to learn a thing or two in the kitchen with Zee.

Kyuhyun was burning with high fever last night and I guess I could say that it was that bad because he ended up falling unconscious!

That really scared the out of me. I had never seen him look that weak. I felt even worse that I had been ignoring him for quite awhile now. I could see that he was only trying to reach out to me while I did nothing but push him away.

I couldn’t help it though. Maybe I was just overwhelmed that all of these are happening too fast. After that conversation with Kim Shin last night though and after what happened to Kyu, I guess it’s about time that I stop playing this foolish game of “playing hard to get.”

“You’re up early.” Zee said with a yawn as she walked in the kitchen, still wearing her pajama.

“Oh hey Zee. Good morning!” I greeted her. “I was just trying to make Kyuhyun some mushroom soup before I head to work.”

I let the soup simmer for awhile as I tried to look for a food container for it on the cabinet next to.  

“Did I do it right?” I asked as I noticed Zee came closer to the stove and checked on what I was cooking.

It was pretty much my first time to cook on my own, and even if this was just an instant ready to cook soup pack, I honestly still have level zero confidence.

Zee scooped a little on her spoon and tasted my cooking. I bit my lip, a habit of mine that I do whenever I get nervous about something.

“You know for a first timer, it’s not so bad.” She said with a satisfied smile.

“Thanks, Zee. Well, I guess it’s because I just learned from the best.” I told her, meaning for it to be a compliment for her.

Zee and I had been working as a team in the kitchen even if I was still staying at Kyuhyun’s apartment. Now that I’ve officially moved in here, I was already like her apprentice. I know I was only supposed to stay here for the time being that Super Junior-M promoted in Taiwan, but we have decided to retain this kind of set-up (me staying with the girls) for everyone’s safety from the public eye. If their fans eventually find out that a girl is living with them, that will surely cause a big stir. I still go to Kyuhyun’s apartment from time to time to do some cleaning (which I did yesterday), since well, a deal is still a deal after all.

“I see you added some fresh mushrooms too.”

“Yea, I thought that will ought to give it more flavor. Oh! And of course, I added a pinch of salt and pepper too!”

Zee gave me a good pat on my shoulder as if to say ‘well done, my apprentice!’

“Well, this sure is made with lots of your tender love and care too.” She added with a teasing smile.

“Hey!” I said defensively that I nearly spilled the soup that I was trying to pour on the food container I prepared.

“Oh come on, Angela! You were nearly losing it last night with the excessive worrying that you didn’t even get to finish eating dinner, and now you’re still trying to deny your feelings for him? Aigoo!”

“It’s not that. It’s just that…” I said, suddenly at a loss for words.

“You’re afraid to let your true feelings out in the open?” Zee tried to finish for me.

“Yea. Something like that. I mean, it’s all happening too fast. It feels right but scary at the same time.”

“You know, I kinda understand where you’re coming from, but it shouldn’t stop you from taking that leap of faith if you really want to make things work between you and Kyuhyun. From the way you’ve been acting these past few weeks, girl, we could all tell that you’ve been quite resistant. It’s like your mouth keeps saying no, but your body language clearly says yes. And you know, they say that actions speak louder than words.”

I looked down as I put the pot back down. Embarrassment and guilt are eating me inside.

“Yea, I know. The feelings that I have for Kyu are real and genuine. However, maybe if…” I trailed off, unsure of how I was going to explain what’s been bothering me this whole time.

“If?” Zee raised both her eyebrows, waiting for the coherent words to come out of my mouth.

“Oh! Our situation just seems too complicated, okay?!” I finally uttered out loud, sounding frustrated. “For starters, Kyuhyun is a Korean while I’m a Filipino.”

“So what? I’m Chinese while Heechul’s a Korean, but we’re still together.”

“That’s cos you can speak Hangul well, and actually, that leads me to my next concern: language barrier. I feel like I’ve been giving Kyu a hard time with all my English talk.”

Zee let out a sigh as she sat down on one of the chairs. “Really Angela? Is that really it? Or are you just trying to convince yourself that you two are not compatible?”

“I---I. It’s not that.” I leaned back on the counter, as I slid my hand back and forth on the cold marble interface. I was really starting to feel jittery. “It’s just that I’ve never been in a serious relationship before. Not even with a fellow Filipino. I just don’t know how this will work. Aren’t we too different?”

“It will.” Zee said, sounding a little bit more encouraging. “It’s not exactly rocket science. You support each other, be there for each other. There may be hard times but you go through it together. If it’s language barrier you’re worried about, then learn. I did not just wake up one day and spoke Korean, you know.”

“Well, you sure have a good point.” Good things take time after all.

“Besides, if you must know. Heechul told me how Kyuhyun’s been working the extra mile in learning English. Apart from asking for mine and Henry’s help a lot recently, I heard he enrolled at their company’s English tutorial classes which was really surprising because Kyuhyun once told me that he was done learning English after he graduated from High School. He hated it because he found it to be too hard. But for him to squeeze that in and give it another shot despite of his hectic schedule, it sure looks like he’s really determined to get better at it.”

I thought about it for awhile. To be quite honest, I kinda noticed he was becoming more confident in speaking English. I was about to let out a smile then my face fell when I realized that he could just be doing it so he can reach out to his English speaking fans.

 “And I’m pretty sure he’s not just doing it just so he can reach out to his international fans.” As if she read what was going on inside my head, Zee gave me a knowing look and I blushed at this information.

I already saw how much effort Kyuhyun has gone through just by trying to reach out to me, and knowing this made my heart flutter.

I found myself smiling at the thought but it suddenly fell as soon as another thought passed by my mind.

“What’s bothering you now?” Zee asked as she peered at my already worried-stricken face.

“I just realized that it hasn’t been long since Kyuhyun got heartbroken over Victoria, and…” I bit my lip. “One of the reasons why I’ve been holding back is because I’m afraid of becoming his rebound.”

Zee went silent for awhile, and she waited patiently for me to continue pouring my heart out.

“I mean, come on. What is my advantage over someone he’s known for a long time? Let’s face it. I was just some random girl he nearly ran over in the streets after all. He couldn’t even wait to get rid of me.”

“And that was before. Sure, you may just be some ‘random girl’ he met but can’t you really see it?” My friend was asking, sounding a little frustrated.

“See what?” I gave her a clueless expression.

“How it is that out of all the billions of women in the world, it was you he crossed paths with that fateful night?”

“Coincidence?” I said with a shrug.

And just as the reaction I was expecting, Zee put her wide-open palm on her face, as if she was finally giving up on how dense I was.

But honestly, speaking…

“I know what you mean, Zee.” I chuckled at her. “I was just messing with you.”

Of course, I honestly believed that meeting Kyuhyun and the rest of the gang was more than mere coincidence.

And with that, I knew this couldn’t mean nothing.

“I understand and I know I can’t say anything to convince you if that’s true or not but what I’m sure is that Kyu isn’t the type of person who uses other people in that way. I know it may be hard to believe and he could be really a real snark at times, but he’s one of the most genuine people that I know.” Zee told me with a hint of reassurance in her voice.

I replied back with a smile. She’s Kyuhyun’s best friend after all, so I guess she knows him really well.

“Thank you for listening, Zee. Maybe I’m just too overwhelmed with our differences. Someone once told me before that when two people are too different, it just will never work out.”

“Well, whoever said that must be a spinster. So bitter” We both giggled at it.

I suddenly remembered one of my single aunts in the Philippines who was nicknamed as a spinster because of her bitter remarks about dating and relationships. I sure didn’t want to be like that!

“You know, Angela. Just give it some time. I’m sure the both of you will work this out.”

I smiled at her again. “You’re right. I guess Kyuhyun and I will need to have the talk as soon as he feels better.”

Zee suddenly rolled her eyes. “He usually recovers quickly but I guess he’s just being a baby right now.”

I couldn’t help but giggle at her. A few minutes back, she was saying really nice things about Kyu.

Oh well, I guess that’s what best friends are for after all.

“Well then. I better get this soup to him then before it gets cold.”

“Wait!”

I was about to close the Kyu’s food container’s lid when Zee suddenly rose from her seat and came to my side.

“Why?” I asked, wondering if there was something I did wrong.

“I forgot to tell you something.” She tiptoed a little and reached for the highest cabinet above from where I was standing.

“Kyuhyun likes his dish spicy.” Zee pulled out a red container with a picture of some red paste