ANGELA   I did the right thing, didn’t I?   The little voice inside my head whispered as I carefully sliced the piece of pancake laid out on my plate. The girls and I are having breakfast. They were all talking about something but I couldn’t really catch up on what it’s all about since my mind is pretty much boggled with something else.   Last night, Jonghyun confessed about being interested in me. I didn’t mind, really. I mean, what’s not to like about him? He’s been nice, sweet, caring and gentle ever since we met. I consider him as my first friend here.   But would I be ready to risk that now? Everything’s happening so quickly though. And not to mention, surreal. I’ve only been here for a month. I’ve been living and interacting daily with these Korean superstars for a month now.   What kind of luck have I really got here? Am I really lucky for landing in such kind of fate? Why am I getting this weird, sinking feeling down in my stomach whenever I think about Jonghyun’s confession? I’m supposed to be happy right? I’m supposed to be—   “Angela?” I felt EunHee’s hand on mine, saving the lifeless, already ragged piece of pancake from my merciless slicing.   And I actually thought I was being careful.   “You were about to slice through the plate.” EunHee, who was looking at me with a worried expression, said concernedly.   I blinked my eyes innocently at her as I think it’s the only thing I could do without doing any further damage on my pride.  This is quite embarrassing to be honest. Why do they always have to see me in my most awkward state? Pfft.   Zee who was sitting across me let out a sigh. “You know, you can take it out on us instead on those two defenceless inanimate objects.”   I sighed as I placed my knife and fork down and pushed the plate away from me. “I did the right thing, didn’t I?”   “What thing?” Kim Shin asked, leaning in forward, her face cupped against her palm.   “About Jonghyun courting me.” I said meekly.   The three all looked surprised and their eyebrows furrowed and before they could even ask me with the question I know they’ll be asking about, I answered it right away.   “I mean, I like him, alright? But…” I trailed off, totally clueless about the next words I’m supposed to say.   Well, it’s not that I don’t really know what I’m supposed to say but it’s just this feeling that it’s already at the tip of my tongue but I can’t bring myself to say it.   And I don’t know why.   “You’re starting to get confused about your feelings and you’re afraid you might hurt Jonghyun in the long run.” Zee filled in for me matter-of-factly and my eyes widened in amazement.   That’s how exactly I’m feeling. I wonder how this girl can always read my thoughts. Am I that transparent to her?   “And your eyes are widening because Zee is right… Right?” Kim Shin asked with one eyebrow raised and a knowing smile.   “Right. How do you know that?” I asked, sounding defeated.   EunHee chuckled heartily beside me. “Oh Angela. It doesn’t take a genius to figure that one out. And with your obvious actions and expressions, that’s pretty much a giveaway already.”   “And add the fact that we already know what you’re going through right now. So no matter how hard you try to keep it, that doesn’t stop us from not knowing anything. Especially now that you’re staying with us for the next two weeks.”  Zee said smugly.   Well, she does have a point there, and with a person as sharp as she is, it would be hard to keep things from her. It’s a good thing that she’s someone trustworthy. Next to Jonghyun, Zee is the next person that I’m at ease with. And now the list is growing longer with Kim Shin and EunHee around. I’m still a little awkward with the boys of Super Junior but I’m enjoying their company somehow. Well at least under the company of the ones I live with. Yes, even Kyuhyun, although there always seems to be a mental debate going on inside me whenever I think about it. At times I would admit it but at time it’s hard to admit that he’s starting to be okay for me now.   Right. So moving on, I think this is the perfect time to know the other half of the boys better.   “Fine! You caught me, alright?” I exclaimed in surrender as I cupped my face in between my hands. “I just feel so torn right now whether I did the right thing or not.”   “So! Any plans?” Zee asked with a wide grin and I looked at her with a confused expression.   “Well, what do you suggest I do?”   Honestly, all I want right now is for my mind to be at ease. If I’ll be going out with Jonghyun, I don’t want any of these uneasy feelings.   “Easy. Who do you like the best?” EunHee asked casually.   My jaws dropped at this. And before I could answer, Kim Shin pointed a finger to my lip as if she was casting a spell for me to zip it. “And think about it well before answering.”   “I can’t believe you guys are making me choose when there’s nothing really to choose from.” I told them aghast as I crossed my arms.   Actually, I know there is but I just can’t bear the idea of thinking about it…Err, about him rather as a choice. Kyuhyun might have been sweet to me the night before he left but that doesn’t make him my option, right? Considering he was ill-mannered again just right before he left yesterday.   Besides, they’re just constantly teasing me with him. That’s what this is all about. And no matter what they do, I know I shouldn’t give in.   But you and I both know how you truly feel. Why suppress it? Why don’t you just admit you’re starting to feel some sort of attraction to Mr. Cho? That smug voice whispered at the back of my head.   Oh conscience! Just shut up will you!   I patted both my cheeks lightly as I tried to shrug the annoying voice away. My three girl friends looked knowingly at one another and scoffed.   “Oh come on, Angela! Seriously, would you like us to do the honors of naming your options?” Zee said as she eyed me in scrutiny.   My heart was racing fast. My stomach was feeling uneasy and I’m 100% positive that it’s not because of the food or a bad case of intestinal flu.  I couldn’t find my voice to speak.   Argh! Angela, what is wrong with you?!   “I just realized that both their names end in ‘Hyun’.” Kim Shin giggled.   “So is it Kyu or Jong?” EunHee asked, gesturing both her palms alternately as she uttered each of the names.   “Wait, isn’t a bit too early for me to choose?” I finally blurted out.
“Well, you actually don’t have to answer now. Like what we told you earlier, think about of your choice very well.” Zee told me with a sincere smile as she gave my hand a light pat before collecting the used utensils and heading to the sink to wash all of it. She instructed us to get ready as we are leaving for work in about an hour.   Kim Shin and EunHee went back to their rooms to prep themselves. I stood up and picked up the rag placed on the cold, graphite counter to wipe out the remaining food crumbs on the table while I silently contemplate about what Zee just told me.   No matter how much I want to deny it, I think Kyuhyun is playing a major part in what I am feeling right now. That supposedly private display of affection just happened for one night. ONE NIGHT! How can that one act affect me this way? A part of me thinks that I’m just overanalysing which is really pathetic. I don’t think Kyuhyun would like me. The cold look in his eyes and his curt gestures say it all. Maybe he just decided to be really friendly that night so his hyungs would stop biting his head off like what he said. It is right and just since he’s mean and cold to me most of the time.   Jonghyun’s been kind to me ever since. It is right and just as well to give him a chance, right?   But why is this sinking feeling there again? ARGH!!   I let go of the rag in frustration and turned to glance at Hyung, Zee’s pet German Shepherd, who was lying down with his head between his paws, his nonchalant dark eyes watching me silently.   “What am I going to do, Hyung?” I said softly, just good enough for the two of us to hear.   I was just glancing down at him, waiting for him to tell me it’s gonna be alright, which was close to impossible. Instead, he got up on his paws and let out a huff and walked out on me, like how he greeted me the first time I came here.   I can’t help but feel slightly bad that Hyung doesn’t like me. Every dog I used to cuddle from way back home seems to reciprocate what I’m feeling for them. They would wag their tails at the sight of me or would even my face every time. I don’t know what I did wrong but then Zee told me not to worry because her dog is naturally like that to other people apart from her. Well, that reassures me somehow.   So I just chuckled to myself and went back to wiping the table. At least that alleviated the stressful thought that’s been bugging me from last night. Haha!

 

I was so relieved to know that there are a lot of things to do at work today. At least there are a lot of things to keep me sane, so as to keep me from overthinking about the same thing again and again. There are a number of dogs checked in for today. Eunhyuk Oppa’s cuddly Pomeranian, Choco, for one is checked in for the time being as his owner is also staying in Taiwan for the next 2 weeks. Compared to Hyung, it’s also only been a day since we bonded but I think we kind of share a special connection already. Or maybe he’s just naturally friendly.   I spend around thirty minutes to one hour in order to finish grooming one dog, especially when they have long coats. If Minhyuk is here today, he will be the one helping me. I’ve heard from the girls that he applied as a volunteer yesterday. I guess I was busy doing something when he came in. I think Zee mentioned earlier that he was supposed to start today but then he received a call from him saying that he might not be able to come after all since he had to attend to something urgent. When I first met Minhyuk, I already got the feeling that he is really sweet and nice. Despite of his busy schedule, he was able to squeeze in volunteering to help around here.   I think I would appreciate it even more if Kyuhyun volunteered here instead of playing that Star Craft game of his whenever he have his free time. He’s giving me a hard time cleaning after his mess too.   Okay. That was a very random thought.   I started scrubbing Choco’s scalp rapidly but at the same time gently as I tried to bury the thought six feet under my consciousness.   After bathing Choco, I was about to get started on the next dog in line which is a Labrador Retriever when I realized that I’m out of towels. I checked the closet where we usually put the spare ones but to my dismay, I didn’t see any as well.   I placed Choco back in his cage before going down the lobby to inform Zee about the sudden shortage in towels. As I was going down, I heard a familiar, deep male voice.   Heechul Oppa.   He and Zee were speaking in Korean so I couldn’t really understand a thing. Not only is the language foreign to me but they are speaking fast too. I wonder if I’ll ever get to learn their language. I can’t imagine myself speaking that fast.   Although I think I could tell that they are talking about a serious matter by the tone of their voices. I don’t know if I’m just hallucinating but Heechul Oppa sounds kind of…concerned and worried.   I took a peek by the stairs which was just behind the desk and saw that Heechul Oppa had a serious face on—one that would mean to say that he really seems worried. I wonder what’s bothering him.   Oh well. I guess this is the perfect time to intervene while they’re not talking.   “Hey Zee,” I began as I went up to them. “Annyeong haseyo, Heechul Oppa.”    I greeted quite awkwardly, hoping it would somehow lighten up his very serious mood. I’ve learned some of the basic greetings here, and one of which is that. The girls are the ones teaching me.   Since Heechul Oppa seems like a pretty hard case to crack, I thought my desperate attempt to speak basic Korean would never work on him, which is why I was really surprised when I heard him chuckle, just like how my girl friends would be whenever they hear my awkward accent.   “Oh hello there Angela!” He greeted with a wide grin. “So, is Zee punishing you with too much work?”   Okay… So he looked so serious earlier and now he’s turned into some sort of a comedian. His mood shifts so quickly!   “Would you like to go back here and experience again for yourself, Heechul?” Zee challenged him.   Zee told me about Heechul Oppa volunteering here because of a bet he lost with her. It was all because of his cat, Heebum who was said to dislike women. The challenge was for Zee to make Heebum like her. Heechul Oppa was overconfident, as Zee had put it, but what he didn’t know was that Zee worked as an animal volunteer back in Canada and she had a background in taming animals with bad temper. And that’s what led to Hee