Prompt 14: Vacation

Sandy beaches, clear water, quiet scenery; are these all there are to accompany him?

October 7^th. What an important day.

But here he is, all alone. The poor boy probably doesn’t even know what is running in his mind right now. A birthday shows how much you are loved on the world, but to him, it’s merely a date to remind him that what is his purpose on this world.

He trailed along the beach, kicking the seawater and letting the fine sand ride on the wind as he released it from his palms. He spent the whole day there, or to be more specific, since 10 AM till now where the sun is setting. Tears that has flocked his eyes for so long finally dried up and the only thing he could think of doing now, is to wait.

Wait for someone, anyone to come and pick him up, he guesses.

From this hell of a vacation he is at right now.

He feels so messed up right now. So messed up that he might explode any second. He can’t even understand what does he want or what does he need. It’s as if a hurricane just went through his mind, making his lose himself. The boy looked around the beautiful scenery, realizing that this is his very first time he asked for a birthday present form his parents, that is to leave him alone. He ran all the way here, at this isolated beach to spend one whole day alone, only to achieve,

Nothing. Nothing of what he originally planned of.

He gave himself a light slap on the face before chuckling softly, wondering what has he done throughout the day. Was it that hard to just sort out his feelings? Wouldn’t it be easy to wrinkle out his messed up mind and line his thoughts again by a-b-c? Why is he making things so complicated for himself, even if he knew the fact that it’ll hurt even more as time goes by?

“Well, are you happy when you’re around him?” The boy said while facing the big blue sea.

Is he? He assumes he is. Kris’s smile always gives him a sudden rush of happiness that he cannot explain. Not just that, whenever he’s able to get in a closer contact with Kris, he believes he is the luckiest person yet. Kris always looked after him with care, even though he’s a bit obtuse at times. So—is that called being happy?

“Then, do you want to confess?” The boy asked himself out loud.

Can he? He doesn’t think he can. Kris has a girlfriend now and he is merely a person he knows in school. He used to hope that they’ll break up quickly but he’s not a kid anymore, he can’t be that immature. He knows very well how Kris doesn’t like being fit into a tight spot where he must hurt either side. If he confesses, neither side will gain. His only choice is to wish them happy. So—he can’t confess?

“But, isn’t he yours?” He then questioned himself.

Is he? He doesn’t have the rights to say it is his. He has known Kris for merely a year, unlike some others who’ve known him for an even longer time. It’s just not right to call someone you’ve been a bit more intimate with “yours”. Even though he treated you a bit better than others. Even though you had feelings for him that you’ve never dared to tell him. Even though you wanted to be a closer to him. So—is he yours?

“Why do you like him in the first place?” He simply asked.

He doesn’t know. Don’t they always say that the sweetest love is when you don’t know why do you like that person? To him instead, it’s probably the most excruciating love. He wants to give up so badly, to remind himself that he already has someone, to stop himself, but he can’t. He wants to persuade himself with whatever he liked Kris with was a lie, but he couldn’t even think of something.

So—why did he like him in the first place?

“Finally, aren’t you tired?”

A soft tear trickled down the boy’s face when the words slipped out of his mouth. He is tired, really tired. He feels drained–out, exhausted and he really wants to stop thinking about it. His affections for Kris have mentally killed him again and again, and he really wants to stop right now. He couldn’t understand why is it so hard to love someone now. He only wanted the best for him and nothing more. He didn’t want all these ed up issue and worries to come torturing him every night.  He never-

“Yixing, is that you? I have been looking everywhere for you! Where on earth did you run off to-“ A voice screamed from the other side of the beach.

The boy’s head slowly turned to the voice’s direction, only to cry even harder as he saw the male running towards him.

Kris, why must it be you.

A/N: ish quality story. sorry guys

main pic: granelli